Control
by HugzForFree
Summary: Spencer Hastings is a 22 year old Philadelphia native, USC graduate, and new English teacher at Rosewood High. Emily Fields is a talented, shy, confused 14 year old who has a massive crush on her female teacher. What happens when one of them loses control? AU. WARNING: SEXY TIME WILL BE VERY "SEXY"
1. Chapter 1

**SO I NEVER THOUGHT I'D WRITE A SPEMILY STORY BUT FENDER18 HAS INSPIRED ME. THIS STORY IS ALMOST COMPLETELY ORIGINAL, SIMILARITIES WILL BE SUBTLE. AND NO, SPENCER AND EMILY DON'T GET TOGETHER WHILE SHE'S THAT YOUNG, IT TAKES A LITTLE TIME AND A LITTLE DRAMA.**

**LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK, REVIEWS, COMMENTS, ETC. ALL WELCOMED**

**THANK YOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**

"Good morning, I'm Ms. Hastings." Spencer began while sitting behind her oak desk. "Welcome to ninth grade English. This is a new experience for all of you, and it just so happens to be for me too. This is my first year teaching and I couldn't be more excited. Now I know new can be scary, but I promise to try and make this transition as smooth as possible." Butterflies fluttered in Spencer's stomach as she addressed her students for the first time in her life. "I'm very much looking forward to getting to know all of you. What really interest me in beginning my teaching career, here at Rosewood, is the fact that you'll have me, for English, all four years. Now I know that's probably less than ideal for some of you, having to look at the same teachers faces for four years, but I believe it'll be beneficial." Spencer walked around and leaned on the front of her desk. "It's very forward thinking of Rosewood high to have structured your four major subjects in this manner. That way your growth academically won't be interrupted by introducing you to a new teacher, with a different demeanor, teaching style, etc. So...you all are stuck with me, but I promise you won't be unhappy about it." She smiled brightly at her new students.

Spencer, who was only twenty two, felt uneasy about the way some of the young men were looking at her, but it's to be expected being such a young educator. It didn't help that she was five nine with legs that any woman would envy. Or that her naturally wavy auburn hair fell to the middle of her back. With her cleft chin and perfect cheekbones, she could have easily been mistaken for a model. Although she expected to become a few of her young male student's fantasy, she still wasn't fully prepared for the ogling that was occurring. Being the consummate professional she was, she shook off the lustful gazes, and continued with her lesson plan for the first day of school.

Emily Fields, Paige McCullers, and Mona Vanderwaal all sat in the same row, one next to the other, as they'd done the entirety of their schooling. They've been friends since before they were born since their mothers were all childhood friends. Emily sat still and listened attentively as her new teacher spoke. She turned around to write something on the board. For reasons unknown to herself, she couldn't stop her eyes from wandering all over Ms. Hastings form. She was one of the most beautiful women Emily had ever seen. Emily thought her new instructor looked perfect in her grey pencil skirt and black blouse, that clung in some places and hung in others. As hard as she tried, she couldn't avoid looking at her perfectly toned legs, accentuated with at least six inch black strappy heels.

"If it's not too much of an inconvenience, I'd like all of you to sit where you're seated for the rest of the school year. It'll be easier to remember all of your names that way, so if anyone wants to switch seats do it now." Spencer looked around her classroom as no one budged. "Good. So, I'm going to give each of you an index card to fill out the info I have on the board there." Spencer walked up to each student, asked his or her name, and handed them a index card. The closer Ms. Hastings got to Emily, the more her heart pounded. 'What's wrong with me?' she asked herself.

"And you?" Ms. Hastings floral scent sent a chill up and down Emily's spine. She was standing close enough to touch, and Emily wished she could.

"Uh...Emily...Emily Fields." She almost forgot her own name.

"Nice to meet you Emily, welcome to high school." Spencer smiled at the seemingly nervous girl, handed her an index card, and moved to the next student. Emily noticed her palms were sweaty and asked to use the restroom. She needed more than a few moments to compose herself.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Emily asked herself aloud. 'She's your teacher, you can't have a crush on your teacher.' She thought while splashing cold water on her face. Up until now, she had never fully admitted that she looked at women in a sexual way, but Ms. Hastings was making it harder to deny. 'I can't be gay. I'm not gay, there's just no way.' She collected herself as best she could and headed back to class.

At lunch Mona, Paige, and Emily found a table close to the large picture windows in the lunchroom. Immediately noticing Ms. Hastings across the room, her cheeks turned a bright red.

"Hey, Em?" Mona had never seen a look like that on her best friend's face. "Em?"

"Huh? Yeah, wassup?"

"You just don't look like yourself."

"Who do I look like then?"

"I don't know, you look a little flustered."

"She's been acting strange all day." Observed Paige.

"I have not, I'm just...it's just a little overwhelming, high school's so different."

"Well get used to it, we've got another four years." Mona laughed and mushed Emily's hair.

"Hey, cut it out!" the girls laughed and ate their lunch.

Spencer sat alone at one of the teacher's table with only an apple and a water for lunch. Even though half the day was gone, her stomach was still very much in knots. When she noticed her best friend, and fellow colleague, Aria Montgomery coming her way, she could have sworn she saw one of her female students gawking at her. She ignored what she thought was innocent and greeted Rosewood's newest art teacher.

"Hey Aria."

"Hey Spence. How's your first day going so far?"

"Pretty nerve wracking, but so far so good. The students I've met so far seem nice. You?"

"So amazingly great." Aria has always been one of the most bubbly people she's ever known, but today her chipperness was in overdrive. "What I love most about teaching art is that it's an elective, so all the students actually want to be there. There is so much talent here, some of these kids could give me a run for my money. I think it's impossible for me to be more excited. Is that all you're gonna eat?"

"Whoa Aria, want to spend some time actually breathing? You do know that it's an essential human function, right? Here I'll show you, first you inhale, then you exhale, it's rather easy, see."

"Very funny asshole." Aria said under her breath but couldn't help but laugh. She began scanning the cafeteria. "This place is so much different than Friends Central. I would have died ten times over if I had to eat lunch with my teachers in the same room."

"I know, but it's just as nice. Rosewood is a very progressive school, they want the student body to interact with the staff in a mature way. I'm loving it."

"Speaking of loving your job, are your parents finally okay with you being a teacher instead of a lawyer, now that we've graduated and have jobs and all?"

"Not in the slightest." Spencer said with a wide smile and a tiny chuckle. Her parents, who are partners at their own law firm, wanted both their daughters to join the family business, but she had other plans.

"You're parents are really something else. They hated that you choose sports over the debate team, they hated your first boyfriend, they hated you going to USC instead of Harvard. Then they hated your first girlfriend. Will they ever like anything you do?"

"If they aren't choosing it themselves, then I'd say no." Spencer could care less what her parents loved or hated about her life, she danced to the beat of her own drum.


	2. Chapter 2

Emily, Paige and Mona all lived within a half mile of each other, so they walked home together. Paige's house was the biggest. Her parents owned their own dentistry practice, and made us floss at every sleepover. Mona's house was the second biggest. Her dad works in product development at Motorola, while her mom stays at home. Lastly, Emily's house, wasn't as large as the others, but was nothing to sneeze at. Her mother is a general surgeon and her father trains recruits in the military. The three friends parted ways one by one until Emily was left alone to walk the two blocks from Mona's.

"Hey sweetie, how was your first day?"

"Solid, uneventful. You aren't working today?"

"I'm on call, but probably not. You hungry? I could make you a light snack before I get started on dinner."

"No thank you, I'm just going to go get started on my homework." Emily said, making her way to the staircase.

"Homework on the first day?"

"It's just a personality quiz I have to fill out for English. She wants to 'get to know us'." Emily told her mother, mocking her teacher.

"Well alright. I'll call you when dinner is ready." Pamela Fields gave her daughter a smile. She couldn't help but feel sentimental now that her only child was a high schooler.

**Back at school**

"I just bumped into the cutest guy in the hallway." Aria walked into Spencer's class just as she was packing up for the day.

"Aria, you know they're jailbait, right?"

"Not a student, asshole, a fellow teacher. He's so sexy, he's got a wicked smile, dark curly hair, and a cute butt."

"Does cute butt have a name?" Spencer asked moving towards the door.

"Ezra Fitz, he teaches Advanced Placement Calculus."

"So cute butt has a brain, that's a plus." Spencer laughed. "Do you want to grab a bite to eat, I'm starved."

"Sure, let's try the Applerose Grill. I heard they have a really good surf and turf platter."

"Great, I could really go for some steak and shrimp."

Twenty minutes later Aria and Spencer were seated in the middle of the Applerose Grill, taking in their new surroundings, waiting for their orders.

"I really like Rosewood, it's so quaint, and all the people are really friendly." Spencer smiled widely thinking about how different her new home was from where she grew up, just forty minutes away.

"Yeah, I think we're definitely here to fuck shit up." Aria said quoting "Step Brothers". Aria was rarely serious. Spencer thought that her tiny friend, that could easily still pass for a teenager, was wildly inappropriate, but hysterical. Aria looked adorable, Spencer thought, in a light grey knee length dress. The purple cardigan she paired it with made the flecks of hazel, in her emerald eyes, pop. "So since I've found my next boyfriend, let's find you a girl." She was endlessly attempting to find Spencer a girlfriend.

"Aria seriously, you just met the guy two seconds ago. And I don't need or want a girlfriend right now. What I need to do is focus on my students, and so should you."

"How can I focus solely on my students when I'm horny all the time? I have needs Spence."

Spencer began laughing. "Take care of them yourself perv." She said as she continued to laugh at her best friend of fourteen years.

"What about her?" Aria asked, ignoring Spencer, while pointing to a beautiful woman on her laptop, sipping a coffee. Her skin had an olive tone and her eyes were dark. Her jet black, curly hair stopped at her shoulders and her lips were pink and full. As much as Spencer wanted to ignore her, this mystery woman had her full attention.

"How do you know she's into women?"

"Look at her pants suit, and she's wearing flats. She likes girls, trust me, my gaydar is better than yours." Spencer wanted to argue with Aria, but oddly her gaydar was much better. "My gaydar is going crazy. Go talk to her, she's hot. And she's all alone, probably hoping for a sexy thing like yourself to come and distract her."

"Aria, can we just eat please?"

"Our food isn't here yet, just go spark up a conversation, I bet you'll get her number."

"I'm not that smooth." Which she wasn't, if it weren't for Aria, she would have never had sex after she broke up with her first girlfriend. Spencer was more shy than she liked to admit, she could never approach a girl. Aria got her laid more times than she could count on two hands.

"Fine, I'll go talk to her." Before Spencer could protest, Aria was closing in on the raven haired beauty across the restaurant. "Excuse me, I hope you don't find this to be intrusive or offensive but my best friend and I were trying to figure out where you're from." Aria pointed to Spencer, who formed an uncomfortable smile. "You're just so pretty and look...exotic."

"How could I be offended being called 'pretty'? Born and raised in Hawaii." Her voice was smokey and had the remains of a accent. Her eyes were intense, her smile deadly.

"Oh I love Hawaii, are you an insane person or something? How could you possibly leave?"

"Last time I checked I wasn't insane, but I've been known to change like the weather." The stranger joked. "I moved to to Philadelphia for work but I decided to live in the suburbs and commute so...what's your name bright eyes?"

"Aria Montgomery, nice to meet you uh..." Aria stuck her hand out and waited for a name.

"Meilani Akina, nice to meet you too." She responded shaking Aria's hand. Aria took a seat next to the Hawaiian.

"Can I be honest with you Meilani?"

"I wouldn't want anyone to be anything else with me."

"My best friend, Spencer, she thinks you're gorgeous, but she's way too shy to even think about talking to a beautiful woman such as yourself." Aria and Meilani glanced over at Spencer who had begun eating the food that just arrived.

"So, she's single?" Meilani gave Spencer the once over again.

"Sure is. I don't know how though, Spencer is really a smart, sweet, incredible person." Aria couldn't have been more genuine.

"And you're like her wingman?"

"Something like that, she didn't send me over here if that's what you're thinking. In fact she's probably over there crawling in her skin." Aria chuckled a bit as she noticed the uneasy expression on Spencer's face. "So...could I give you her number, or are you going to make me a bad wingman?"

Aria walked back over to Spencer as Meilani packed her laptop up and made her way to the exit. Spencer thought her friend might have been offensive, or maybe the mystery woman didn't like what she saw. Spencer knew she wasn't everyone's cup of tea.

"You're food is getting cold."

"Don't you want to know what we talked about?"

"No, lets eat." Spencer said dismissively.

"Are you sure?" Aria asked teasingly. "I think you'd like it." Spencer debated giving in but decided against it.

"Could you pass the pepper?" Just then her phone notified her she had a text.

**Spencer is it? I like that name. You wouldn't mind meeting for coffee sometime would you? This is Meilani btw...**

"Aria?"

"Yep?"

"The woman you were talking to, was her name Meilani?"

"Yep." With that, Spencer replied to the beautiful stranger.

**At the Fields**

Emily just got finished her personality questionnaire. All of the questions were pertaining to her likes and dislikes. She couldn't help but think about how much she liked Ms. Hastings, and how much she disliked that she did. Emily could remember the first crush she'd ever had on another girl, she was ten. There were plenty more to follow, but she always brushed them off or ignored them. This crush, however, was impossible to ignore. Emily always thought girls were cute, but for the first time in her life, she was physically attracted to one. When she looked at Ms. Hastings, there was an unfamiliar sensation between her legs. Although she'd never felt anything like that before, she knew Ms. Hastings turned her on, sexually. Emily didn't want to believe she could be gay, and she didn't want to have a crush on her teacher. Especially one she had to see almost every single day. If she couldn't sort out her confusing feelings, it would be a long four years.

Emily pushed her book bag off her bed, laid on her back, put her head behind her head and stared at her white ceiling. What would her friends think? What would people at school think? The people at her church. Emily shuddered at the thought of her parents, particularly her mom, finding out the ocean of thoughts in her mind. Her mom was a Catholic who never missed church, even if she had just worked thirty hours straight. Emily imagined having a conversation with her parents about these "thoughts" and she concluded that she'd probably be sent away to be de-gayed. No, Emily would not be telling them anytime soon, if at all, that she think she just might be... However she did need to talk to someone, desperately. She gave one of her best friends a call.

"Hey Em, wassup?"

"Hey Paige, could we talk, do you have a minute maybe?"

"Sure. You okay, you sound upset."

"Um...I...could we meet at your treehouse?"

"I literally just saw you, why didn't you ask then?" Paige wondered.

"I didn't want Mona to know we were talking without her. I don't want her to know, she'll probably tease me. I need to...you have to promise what's said in the treehouse stays in the treehouse."

"Duh. You know I would never tell anyone anything you tell me."

"Not even Mona?" Emily wanted to be sure. Of course she trusted Paige, more than anything, but no one could know what she was about to tell her best friend. She didn't want to speak the words out loud, but every passing day made it harder to keep inside.

"Not even Mona, swear."

"I'll be there in a few, meet me in there?"

"I'll be waiting for you, with snacks."

Paige was far more understanding and mature than Mona. If Emily had to tell someone, that someone could only be Paige. After getting up off her bed and throwing her sneakers back on she darted down the steps. She ran past her mom after yelling she was going to Paige's. Emily walked the five blocks to the McCullers estate, the gate was open so she walked down the long driveway, and headed straight for their backyard. Emily was always stunned by the elaborate treehouse. It was high above the ground in the largest tree. Calling it a treehouse was sort of insulting to the contractors Paige's parents hired to build it. The only way you could tell it wasn't a real house was the fact that there was a tree in the middle of it. There were windows, a small porch, electricity and water. Emily climbed the winding staircase and walked through the front door, there was also a exit in the rear. The inside was furnished with two plush, red love seats, a recliner, a fifty inch television and a full size bed. Emily estimated that the treehouse was at least a thousand square feet. She spotted Paige on the far side of her home away from home, with her head in her mini fridge.

"Hey, Em! Juice?" Paige was holding two pouches of Capri Sun.

"Sure, thanks."

"Don't act like a stranger, have a seat." Paige flopped down on the love seats across from Emily and tossed her the drink. "So what's wrong Em? Does this have anything to do with why you were so spaced out today? I know it's not because of school, you're one of the smartest people I know. So...what is it?"

"Paige, can I talk to you about anything? Like, say anything at all to you?"

"That's such a silly question, of course, you can tell me anything Em."

"I don't have to worry about you judging me, looking at me differently, or...not wanting to...be my friend anymore?" Emily's voice was a hair above a whisper by the end of her question. She had never felt so terrified in her life. But she couldn't keep holding on to this, she needed to get it out.

"Emily?" Paige rarely used her best friend's full name, but she knew whatever she wanted to talk about was serious. She got up to sit on the opposite couch and put her arm around the sweetest girl she's ever known. "How could you think there is anything you could ever say to me to make me stop being your friend? I would never judge you or treat you any different. You should know me better than that." Emily was shaking with fear, so Paige rubbed her shoulder.

"I just need to be sure Paige, this is...you might..."

"Emily I love you as if you were my own blood, hell we might as well be, we've been best friends since we we're in our mommy's womb.' Paige chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. But Emily couldn't control the emotions spilling out of her eyes. "Em, you're scaring me, please, tell me what's wrong."

"Swear you won't tell a soul."

"Em, I won't. Tell me, whatever it is I can handle it, and we can figure this out together."

"Paige swear!" Emily knew she shouldn't have raised her voice, Paige was only trying to help, but she had to swear.

"I swear that whatever you say will never leave my lips to another living being. I swear I will not judge you or look at you like you have three heads. Cross my heart and hope to die." Emily watched as Paige made a imaginary cross over her heart.

"Okay. Paige," Emily looked her in the eye, she needed to see her reaction, "I think I might be...I think I'm...gay." Paige's eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Emily thought she probably just lost one of her friends and put her face in her hands. She sobbed loudly and half expected to be told to leave. Instead she felt arms engulf her in a tight embrace. Paige let Emily cry for a long while. Once Emily looked into the eyes she was afraid to see, all she saw was love.


	3. Chapter 3

"Spencer's got a daaate, Spencer's got a daaate." Aria, never one to act her age, taunted Spencer.

"Shut up, it's just coffee."

"Stop acting like you're not excited. When's the last time you got laid?"

"Does it matter?"

"That long huh?" Spencer playfully pushed Aria in the shoulder. Just then a bus stopped two feet from where they stood outside the restaurant. The ache in Spencer's heart had to have been apparent on her face. "That's gotta be weird for you for you huh, Spence? Seeing her on magazines, billboards, the side of buses."

"It's not weird it's..." Spencer hung her head. She couldn't come up with the words to describe the anguish she still felt over her breakup with her first love, her high school sweetheart, who was now a movie star. She couldn't go anywhere without seeing her face, a constant reminder of not being good enough.

"Hey, fuck her. She'll never find another Spencer Hastings. Besides she's so deep in the closet, she's probably lonely and miserable. I've got an idea, let's go get a few bottles and get trashed."

"Drinking is never the answer to any problem."

"Problem? What problem? I just wanna get drunk."

Spencer, always the rational one in their friendship, thought against it. "We have school tomorrow."

"So! We aren't the students. Let's go get shit faced to celebrate the first day of our long happy careers." Before Spencer could get out another word, Aria was opening her car door. "Go home, I'll get the bottles, I'll be there in a half hour." She got in her car and drove in the direction of the nearest liquor store.

XXX

After seeing her ex's face, Spencer had a nagging need to see her again, so she looked at some pictures on Instagram. Then she needed to hear her voice, so she watched a few interviews on youtube. She was still so beautiful, even more so. Her mahogany skin was still flawless. Her teeth still perfect. The curves of her small frame were unrivaled by any girl Spencer has dated since. Her hair was a little shorter than the last time Spencer saw her, and dyed a honey brown, in contrast to her natural black locks. Spencer figured she changed her look for a new movie role. At the moment she was promoting her latest project. A movie about a family of vampires who live recklessly and don't want any responsibilities. All that changes when the eldest of the collection of blood suckers is called in to take the reigns of her empire. The former leader had been killed by demons who hate the undead creatures. So the five vampires decide to kill as many demons as they could manage. They also had to find whichever vampire was next in line, so they could maintain their freedom. The trailer looked interesting enough, and there was tons of action, just like Spencer liked. She probably would go see the film alone, there was no way she would ask Aria to join. As much as Spencer wanted to hate her ex, she couldn't, and she made a very sexy vampire. Spencer paused the interview to run her fingers through her hair. She put her head on the table and became grateful that Aria would return soon, with alcohol. She pressed play.

Question: I can't wait to see this movie, I love vampires, was it fun to pretend to be immortal?

Answer: It was a dream come true, I love vampires as well. Honestly I wish I was a vampire, who wouldn't?

Question: (laughs) Right. I can't believe someone who's only twenty two is such a great writer, did you always see yourself writing your own scripts?

Answer: Without a doubt, I have been in love with films for as long as I can remember. I wrote my first script when I was twelve.

Question: Do you still have it?

Answer: Yes, I have it framed actually, in my office at home. Don't expect to see it on the big screen though, it's pretty horrible. (laughs)

Spencer felt a pang in her heart. She had given her that framed copy of her first ever script for her eighteenth birthday. She'd found it in some of her girlfriend's things while helping her pack for college. She couldn't believe she still had it much less sitting somewhere in her home office.

Question: (laughs) I'm sure it's pure genius! Now enough about the movie, you already know what I want to know right? Are the rumors about you and your super hot co-star Colton Haynes true? Is he your newest beau?

Spencer scoffed, knowing that she'd be more interested in her other co-star, Naya Rivera. Who one of her new students resembles, she thought.

Answer: Colton _is_ rather gorgeous isn't he? (laughs) But sadly no, those rumors are false, we're just friends, promoting a movie together.

Question: Is there anyone special in your life at the moment?

Answer: Nope, single as a dollar bill. Which is fine, I'm so focused on work, I wouldn't have time for someone. I'm the type to put everything I have in a relationship. You have to put time, effort, and dedication into that type of commitment, and I really just can't right now. I'm married to my work and that's fine for now. I'm still young, I have time.

Question: Okay, okay, I'll let you off the hot seat. For now. So tell me, you hit it big at nineteen, how's it been adjusting to being a huge star?

Answer: Well, it was pretty difficult at first, being followed by paparazzi, people asking for my autograph, not being able to just go hang at the mall with my friends. But I think I've handled the transition as gracefully as I can. I really don't...

"Hey, why is your door locked? You knew I was coming over."

"Shit." Spencer said under her breath, closing her laptop. "Just a sec Aria." Spencer said, getting up to open the door. Aria had changed into a white tank top, light blue cotton shorts, and matching flip flops. Her long dark hair was pulled back into a messy ponytail.

"God I love living in the same building, we can get wasted and I don't have to drive home." Aria said walking past Spencer.

"What did you get?" Spencer asked, happy she had thought to lock her door. Had Aria caught her, there would have been hell to pay. Aria was fiercely loyal and loathed anyone that hurt someone she loved. Spencer often felt like Aria had more disdain for her ex than she did.

"Some Grey Goose cherry noir, some Parrot Bay pineapple rum, and ta da Patron! Get all of your shot glasses out, and get some tequila in me."

XXX

"Be careful, y-you're drunk." Spencer warned Aria, who was dancing on top of her coffee table. They had both drank three shots of tequila each and was finishing off their second cup of vodka and cranberry.

"Loving you is really all that's on my mind. And I can't help but to think about it day and night, I wanna make that body rock. Sit back and watch!" Aria sang along with Beyonce. "Shut up Spence and watch me dance for you. Tonight I'm gonna dance for you, oh-oh. Tonight I'm gonna dance for you, oh-oh. Tonight I'm gonna put my body on your body." Aria continued her seductive movements, mimicking the singer, drink in hand. Spencer wondered how that tiny five foot one frame could hold so much alcohol. "Do you feel better now?" She hopped off the table onto the couch next to Spencer, spilling some of her drink.

"Hey, you're cleaning that up lady!" Spencer slurred.

Aria burst out in laughter. "You're so smashed Spence! And I asked you a question."

"I guess so." She couldn't stop thinking about her former lover, no matter how much time had past. No matter many girls she slept with.

"Spencer, fuck her. She's all the way on the other side of the country not thinking about you. It's been three years Spence, and you're still not over her? She fucked up remember? You should hate her guts."

She should, Aria was completely accurate in her assessment, but there was one thought Spencer couldn't shake. If she never thought of her, or their three and a half year relationship hadn't meant anything, why did she still have that script. Maybe she kept it because she wrote it, or maybe she would have thrown it away had Spencer not framed it.

"You're right, fuck her." The friends clinked their glasses together and proceeded to drink.

XXX

Emily knew her eyes were begging Paige to say something, but they both remained silent. She couldn't believe she'd actually said the words out loud. She felt as though a ton of bricks were just lifted off her shoulders. After what felt like eternity, Paige spoke.

"Okay...why do you think you're gay?" Asked Paige with raised eyebrows.

"I have these...feelings."

"What kind of feelings?"

"For girls."

"What girls?" Emily knew what Paige was asking her. She'd already thought that was the assumption most females would make once they found out she might be gay. That she wanted them.

"All types of girls. Ones on TV, ones walking down the street. No one I know personally. Well actually, that's a lie. There is someone in particular. When I see her I can't even breath, she's so beautiful and...I...want her."

"Who?" Paige was being cautious, she moved away from Emily a bit.

"Ms. Hastings, I don't think I've ever seen anyone more beautiful in my life." She couldn't believe she was saying all of this, but she was no longer in control of the words spilling out her mouth. Paige relaxed and pulled her in for a hug.

"Gosh, I don't know what to say, except...you can't date a teacher." Emily and her best friend erupted in a giggle fit. She felt so relieved to know that she didn't hate her.

"I know that Paige. But that doesn't change the fact that I find myself attracted to girls."

"Do you look at boys?"

"No, I think boys are gross."

Paige giggled again. "Most of the time they are, but they can be really cute."

"Not to me." The mood became a serious one again. "I think I'm gay."

"If you're gay, then that's alright with me. I love you no matter what."

"Really?" Emily thought her ears were playing tricks on her. "You mean that?"

"Absolutely." Emily embraced her redheaded best friend. "But, there is something I want to know."

"What?" They pulled away.

"Are you sure, because you've said you think over and over. Do you think or do you know? Are you gay?"

"Yes, I am." Emily had never been so sure in her life, or at ease.

XXX

Waking up on her couch with Aria's and her body tangled was something she'd gotten used to over the years. Some people were sloppy drunks, some angry, some horny, but Aria was a cuddling drunk. Spencer had no clue when they drifted off to sleep but, even with the large quantity of alcohol in her system, her internal clock woke her about ten minutes before her alarm went off.

"Aria? Hey, sleepy head, get up."

"Noooo, five more minutes." Spencer was entertained by Aria nuzzling herself closer and tighten her hold. She couldn't be more comfortable with Spencer. Aria didn't blink when Spencer told her she was gay. She just didn't care. Spencer recalled Aria saying something crass like "a orgasm is a orgasm, what's it matter who's giving it to you." She always accepted and supported Spencer, no matter what. The only thing that changed about their friendship was how strong it got. After five minutes had past, Spencer tried again.

"Okay, Aria get up. We have school."

"Shit." Aria sat straight up. "I forgot, I gotta hop in the shower, can't be late." She bounced off the couch, leaned down to kiss Spencer on the head, and flew out the apartment. Spencer decided to wait the extra five minutes before getting her day started.

Spencer settled on a white french cut dress shirt with black stripes, charcoal grey slacks and her favorite pair of black Bianca Spike Louboutins. Even though they lived in the same building, Spencer never waited for Aria. She prefered to get there early and leave a little late. Whereas Aria like to get there just on time, and leave early. So Spencer drove to her new place of employment with black coffee in her portable mug, by herself. She always liked her coffee black, but it was especially needed this morning after too many drinks last night.

Her students started to file in, placing their homework in the assigned bin on her desk. She thought having them place it on her desk, rather than collect it, would save anyone the embarrassment, had they not done the assignment. She knew that some kids were just rebellious and needed a little help, maybe just some attention. If any of her students turned out that way, she'd talk to them, one on one. Be as helpful as she could.

"Good morning class. Glad to see we're all punctual. Let's see if we can keep that up all year." Spencer smiled at her students, she had all of their attention, accept one. The Naya Rivera look-alike. She recalled the girl avoiding eye contact yesterday, perhaps she was just shy. "So everyone did their personality quiz?" Some of the students smile, some nodded. "Great, I did one too. We'll share them. I know you guys are probably used to your teacher just showing up and doing their job, but I want to do more than that. I want to be the type of educator you can rely on, someone you know you can come to if you need help, with anything. I'm not just talking about English, I mean any subject. And it doesn't even have to be about school." She walked back and forth in the front of the class. "It could be about anything, maybe you just need an adult to talk to that's not your parents, or the guidance counselor. I just want you all to know that I'm here for you, to help you be productive students, and not too long from now, young adults. We're going to be spending a lot of time together over the next four years so I think it's smart we get to know one another."

"Now, let's see who's first." Spencer went over to her desk to grab the first quiz. "Sean Ackard, where are you?" A student with bleach blonde hair raised his hand. "Hi Sean, lets see. Your favorite color is blue, you like basketball and you're an Eagles fan. So am I, hope there aren't any Cowboy fans in here, I might have to give you detention." She laughed at her own joke and so did most of the students.

"I'm a Cowboys fan." Some of the students booed when the short, dark haired girl wearing glasses spoke up.

"Hey now, just a little friendly competition guys." Spencer couldn't have been having more fun, and there still was over six hours to go. But she loved her first period, they we're all so lively.

"You're from Pennsylvania, how could you like the Cowgirls Mona?" A light skinned boy wearing Ralph Lauren from head to toe asked.

"My father was born and raised in Texas, it's just how I grew up. I love the CowBOYS and I hate the Eagles." Some of the kids booed again.

"Listen up guys." Spencer look at Mona. "I don't have a lot of rules in my class. But one of them is to never use the word 'hate'. It's a powerful word used to destroy others. Nothing wrong with having love for your sports team, but refrain from using that ugly word in here, okay?" The young lady nodded. "Speaking of rules I guess I should tell you them huh? It's simple, no profanity, don't be late, do your work, respect yourself and others, and don't use that bad word." She looked over at Mona again. "So back to you Sean, one of your hobbies is playing Halo huh? What's your username so I can kick your butt."

"No way you play Halo?"

"I won five Halo tournaments when I was in college, no one wanted to play me after that. So I took to online tournaments, I won a pickup truck and a ton of cash. I think five will be out in a few months, it's called Spartan something, I can't wait."

"This is unreal, there's no way you play Halo." Another boy added to the conversation.

"Why's that because I'm a teacher?" She played dumb. She knew her males students thought there was no way in hell a girl could be better at a video game than them.

"Well, yeah, plus you're a girl."

"Anything you can do I can do better." One of the females students stated.

"Yeah whatever, but not Halo." Sean turned his attention to his new teacher, who he was slowly becoming enamored with. "What's the premise of the game?" He asked suspiciously, folding his arms across his chest.

"It centers on an interstellar war between humanity and a theocratic alliance of aliens known as the Covenant. The Covenant are led by their religious leaders, The Prophets, and worship an ancient civilization known as the Forerunners, who perished in combat with the parasitic flood. The game centers mostly on the experiences of Master Chief John-117, a cybernetically enhanced human super-soldier, and his artificial intelligence companion, Cortana. The term "Halo" refers to the Halo rings, they're large habitable structures that were created by the Forerunners to destroy the flood." Most of the students just looked at her, with shocked expressions on their faces. She was most happy with Sean's face, he couldn't believe what just came out of her mouth. "Write down your username for me. We can play later."

"Okay, you're officially the coolest teacher in the history of the world!"

Spencer laughed, enjoying impressing her students. "I wouldn't go that far, I'm sure Albert Einstein has me beat. But he and I share a birthday so maybe that's why I'm so awesome." She continued going through the quizzes, talking and laughing with her students, finding out what they thought was and wasn't fun.

Emily's heart was racing faster and faster with each paper Ms. Hastings picked up. She couldn't believe it but somehow she's gotten even more beautiful overnight. It was already overwhelming to look at her, but to talk to her, that would be too much. Before she knew it, her name was leaving those beautiful lips. She looked over at Paige, who was attempting to contain her giggle, but she couldn't keep a straight face.

"Is Emily not here?" Ms. Hastings looked confused.

"She's right her." Paige helped. "Emily, she called your name, don't be rude."

"Oh, yeah. Yes, here."

"Good. My favorite color is red too." Ms. Hastings beamed. "You like the Phillies, and you like to ride your bike for fun. Hey! We both share a birthday with old Albert. Looks like we have a ton in common. I know it's lame you guys but I'd like to bring everyone cupcakes on their bday. So extra cupcakes on ours." Her smile made Emily's heart beat a little faster than it's normal pace. When she didn't respond Ms. Hastings went on. "You don't have any siblings? I wish I was an only child, my sister is a pain." She walked over to Emily's desk. "You're not much of a talker are you?" Still lost for words, she just shook her head. "That's okay, we can always talk later, just you and me." Emily didn't think her heart could stand anymore pressure, luckily, the bell rang.


	4. Chapter 4

On friday afternoon Spencer was sitting at her desk grading papers during her free period when Aria walked in.

"Hey sexy, what you up to?"

"I don't know, this little thing called work, maybe you've heard of it?"

"Please, I love working. I get to paint, draw, talk about art, and look at other's art all day long. I'm living the dream. But I can't say I'm not counting down the days til summer."

"Seriously?" Spencer finally looked up from her papers to see a casually dressed Aria. She had on a black cardigan, paired with a white tee underneath, blue jeans, and black boots. In complete contrast to Spencer who opted for a brown pullover shawl, khakis, and a pair of beige Louboutins. She thought her best friend took the term "casual friday" too literally.

"Yes really, three down only one hundred seventy seven to go. This is the best job in the world, a whole summer off, I can't wait. We're going to get so wasted."

"You're a mess." Spencer laughed and resumed her grading.

"Excited for your date tonight?" Aria took a seat next to Spencer's desk.

"It's not a date, it's just coffee."

"At seven? Trust me, it's a date. You gonna get some cheeks tonight?"

"Aria, we just met!"

"So, you need some ass. And she's probably wild in bed."

"How do you figure?"

"She's exotic. They know how to have a good time, they're freaks, I would know." Spencer knew Aria was referring to the only woman she's ever had sex with. While they were at USC, an attractive Dominican girl would stop at nothing to get the brunette to her dorm. One day Aria finally gave in and ended up having a passion filled three month romance. Then a cute basketball player by the name of Corey caught her eye, and the islander got her heart broke. Spencer told her not to fall for Aria, but who wouldn't.

"Be that as it may, I'm not looking for sex. If something is going to happen between us, it'll be friendship first. We can see what happens from there."

Aria put her finger in her mouth then made a gagging noise. "You're so lame. But you're my lame." She got up and sat in her best friend's lap. "Why are you doing work on your free period. Let's go play hooky."

Spencer adjusted Aria's weight on her. "Don't you have a class you have to teach in about fifteen minutes?"

"Hence the word hooky, duh."

Spencer stared blankly into those vast green eyes. "Go away." Aria groaned, pecked Spencer's lips and walked away, disappointed her best friend wouldn't ditch class.

_**Later that evening**_

Always the early bird, Spencer was waiting at the Applerose Grille a half hour before she was supposed to meet with Meilani. They texted every night since Aria had given out her number. Nothing too deep, just light flirting, and small talk. In the middle of her second game of temple run, she felt a tap on her shoulder.

"Hello beautiful." She liked to be early too.

This was the first time Spencer heard her voice, it was sultry and alluring. She stood to her feet to greet the beautiful stranger, who was a few inches shorter. She looked stunning in a black blazer covering the sheer black top she wore, her black bra visible. She had on black leather pants and a motorcycle helmet in her hand. "Hi Meilani. You look...incredible." She couldn't control her eyes drinking in every inch of her from head to toe.

"So do you beautiful, and call me Mel." Spencer couldn't help but blush. Especially since she'd only thrown on a plaid button up, jeans and Chuck Taylors. She extended her hand only to have Meilani take it and kiss the back of it. "Let us sit."

"You like to ride?" Spencer inquired as the waitress sat their orders in front of them. They decided to get a meal since neither had ate. After enjoying casual chatting, Spencer wanted to know more.

"I love to ride." Spencer blushed at Meilani's obvious sexual tone. "I'm sorry, my friends say I make everything sound dirty. I have three bikes. Just got my first chopper built at Cavanaugh's in Jersey, do you know of them?" A wide smile spread across Spencer's face.

"Yes. Actually I know Toby Cavanaugh."

"You're kidding me."

"Nope. He's a really good friend of mine. Too bad I didn't meet you sooner, I could have got you a discount."

"Aw man. Well, I'll take my car there to get tricked out, see what you can do." Meilani joked.

"No problem." The ease of their interaction made Spencer blush, yet again.

"How in the world do you know Toby Cavanaugh?"

"He was actually my first, and last, boyfriend."

"You're kidding me." She repeated. "Did he take it hard, finding out you liked the ladies?"

Spencer laughed. "I'll say, he was so pissed. And hurt, he thought he found his future wife. Not knowing I wanted a wife too."

"Now that he's rich and famous, does he act different?"

"Not at all. I was the one who encouraged him to do the reality show. When it debuted at number one and his shop became overrun with bike and car orders, he sent me flowers every week for two months."

"He's so sweet, and really good at his job. Originally I was quoted a eight month wait. That man told me he put in extra hours to get it to me in five."

"That's Toby for you."

"Must be weird, having a famous ex?" Spencer shifted in her chair, not sure if she should reveal she had two.

"No, not really, they're people just like us. They're just on TV and loaded. So, what do you do Mel?"

"I'm the director of network engineering at Comcast." Spencer was impressed. She watched Meilani's sexy mouth wrap around her fork, enjoying her spaghetti.

"What do you do on a day to day basis."

"Do you really wanna hear that? Most people find it boring."

"I'm not most people and I don't really think anything out your mouth could be construed as boring. So, yes I'd like to hear." The smile on her face made Spencer's heart pulsate.

"Flattery will get you **_everywhere_** beautiful. Anywho, I'm responsible for overseeing and directing the national engineering group in support of the Comcast National Backbone. I oversee a highly technical team responsible for the design, scaling and implementation of the national optical. And the Layer 3 networks to include the core, edge, 3rd party interconnect relations and associated national fiber and facilities. Also I work closely with field operations, product development engineers and business development staff. I have to maintain and update engineering records of the network like network maps, databases, optical schematics, and wavelength plans, I really could go on and on. I'm boring aren't I?"

"Not at all, I assure you. You talk about you work with such glee and passion. It's refreshing."

"I do everything with passion beautiful." She gave Spencer a wink, and suddenly, her insides were on fire.

"Where'd you go to school?"

"Massachusetts Institute of Technology." She responded nonchalantly.

"You went to MIT?" Spencer was wet, nothing turned her on more than brilliance.

"Yep." She shoveled more spaghetti in her mouth.

"Their acceptance rate is under ten percent."

"8.9 percent to be exact."

"What did you get on your SATs?"

"2072, you?"

"2379."

"Holy shit, I'm impressed. Damn near perfect score. Where'd you go to school, and what for?"

"I'm the under achiever in my family. Everyone's in business or law and have a Ivy league education. I went to USC, for English while obtaining a certification in education. I teach English to the most amazing high school freshman, and I couldn't imagine doing anything else. My sister went to Harvard, both my parents attended Dartmouth. They basically groomed Melissa and I to do the whole Ivy league education then go to law school thing. But I wanted to teach. Just the thought of being able to help shape the young minds that are our future, I couldn't pass that up." Meilani got up from her seat and came to stand over Spencer. In an instant, and without a word, their lips were one. Meilani was already seated again when Spencer came out of the trance those soft lips put her in. She looked across the table in utter shock.

"Would you like to order dessert?" A nod was all Spencer could give.

During the rest of their dinner, dessert and lattes, Spencer discovered Meilani was thirty three and lived in Honolulu until she went away for college. She had two brothers and three sisters, she was the oldest. She realized she was gay once she fell in love with her roommate freshman year. They maintained a four year relationship until Meilani had to move to New York after a head hunter gave her an offer she couldn't refuse. Her favorite band was Linkin park, her mom was her hero, she loved technology and she's only been in two serious relationships. Dancing was her second love and photography was her third. She loves to travel but doesn't have much time to because she works nights, and most weekends, but she wouldn't have it any other way. Moving to Philadelphia was a tough decision, but she couldn't pass up being in charge, just how she liked it. Four weeks after she was hired, she relocated to Rosewood to buy a bigger house in a nicer neighborhood.

Spencer could not have been more captivated. She was shocked to hear that Meilani was over thirty because she didn't look like she was old enough to buy a drink. She was beautiful, intelligent, funny, and sexy. Everything she was looking for in a woman.

"I can't believe you had time to come out with me." They were standing in front of Meilani's motorcycle, holding each other's hands.

"I'm actually on vacation at the moment, I have nine more days left. I try to only take a vacation once a year, around my birthday."

"Oh, your birthday's coming up?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that...it's today."

"Oh my goodness, and you're out with me? Why didn't you say something. And why aren't you celebrating with friends or partying?"

"Honestly this was the best birthday I've had in a long time." She leaned in and captured Spencer's lips again. The first kiss was short, sweet, slow. This time it was deep, lustful, hungry.

"Do you always kiss your dates so unexpectedly?" Spencer asked after they parted.

"I haven't been on a date in...goodness...I don't know how long, but aren't the things that are least expected the best?"

"Sometimes, or they can be the worse."

"I try not to think like that. I just live my life, trying to make every moment matter, and in that moment I needed to kiss you. I never thought I could be so turned on hearing someone talk about their profession." Spencer thought the same. "But the way your whole face lit up talking about your students, I just had to. Life is so short, why not do the things you want when you want? That's how I am and I can't be any other way." Spencer felt her heart pulsate again, she hadn't felt like this in too long a time to measure. "You're beautiful, you know that?"

"Thank you. Happy birthday."

"Thank you."

"So no parties, no card or cake? No balloons, no funny hats?"

Meilani smiled. "I haven't have much time to make new friends. It's just me out here by my lonesome."

"Well you don't have to be alone tonight." Spencer released one of Meilani's hands and rubbed her face.

"An what exactly is that a invitation for?"

"To spend the whole night with me. We can go anywhere and do anything. It is your birthday afterall. So where to?"

So much for being friends.

**WELP, THERE YOU GO, 3 CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY (I WISH EVERYONE DID THAT). IF YOU HAVEN'T GUESSED ALREADY, THIS WILL BE A LONG STORY. THERE WILL BE LOVE AND HEARTACHES BEFORE YOU SEE SPEMILY. BUT IT WILL BE WORTH IT. ENJOY THE RIDE. I'LL UPDATE WITHIN THE NEXT 48 HOURS.**

**REVIEWS ARE MORE THAN WELCOMED, TELL ME WHAT YA THINK.**

**-MANAGEMENT**


	5. Chapter 5

While changing for gym, it dawned on Emily how dismayed she was it was friday. She wished she had school on the weekends just so she could be in the same room as Ms. Hastings, if only for a hour and fifteen minutes. Now she had to wait another sixty or so hours before she saw her again. No. Lunch, she'd see her at lunch. She couldn't help but smile, wishing gym was over already just to catch a few glimpses of the object of her affection. She wasn't sure how, but Ms. Hastings got more beautiful everyday.

Gym was the only class she didn't share with either of her best friends. It was only the third day of school, but she hadn't managed to talk to anyone new. Sometimes being immensely introverted was a burden so heavy, she thought she would eventually collapse under the weight of it. She tried to speak up, to stand out, but she always fell a little short. She walked out of the locker room and into the gym. Some of her classmates were playing basketball, some badminton, there was a friendly game of tug-o-war on the far side. At times like these she cursed herself for being so shy. For being incapable of walking up to a to a unfamiliar person and introducing herself, effectively making them no longer strangers. For a split second she thought about possibly joining the girls playing badminton, but walked over to the bleachers, having a seat instead.

"Gym is where you go to be active, not sit on your butt." Emily turned to her right and was face to face with a very pretty blonde girl with a round face and dark ocean blue eyes. She smiled, her face formed dimples, the weren't deep, they were barely there, but still noticeable. Her lips full and perfectly pink. Emily thought she was kind of sexy. As soon as the thought entered her mind she averted her eyes, as if the girl would be able to tell what's going on in her mind with a look.

"You're sitting on your butt." It was all she could think of.

"I saw you doing it and it looked like fun. Thought I'd give it a try, how am I doing?" She laughed at her own joke and was seemingly waiting for a reply. Was this girl flirting with her? It couldn't be.

"Not bad." The good looks of the stranger sitting beside her caused her brain to momentarily freeze. She couldn't think of anything witty to say. Who was this girl and where did she come from?

"I'm Samara, you got a name?" Good, she wasn't put off by the lack of banter.

"Emily." She feared Samara would think she was being short, when in all actuality, she was taken aback by how attractive she thought she was. "Um...why aren't you playing or something?"

"Why aren't you?"

"My mom says I should stay away from people who answer questions with questions."

"Why's that?"

"Another question huh? Because she says someone like that either can't think of an appropriate response or they can't be trusted."

"Maybe I can't be trusted, or maybe I just like to play word vollyball." Emily contorted her face into a questioning expression. "I like to go back and forth with people, word for word. It's fun. So what are you mixed with?"

"What makes you think I'm mixed?"

"Who's the one that can't be trusted now?" Samara let out a laugh like she just heard the funniest joke she ever heard. Emily couldn't help but laugh too, she walked into that one.

"My dad is Fillipino, my mom is French, German, Spanish, Native American, Scottish and Irish." Emily braced herself for another snarky response.

"Wow...what a beautiful combination." She was silent for a moment and Emily didn't know what to say. "What grade are you in?"

"I'm a freshman."

"Oh. I'm a sophomore."

"Have they always mixed gym classes?" She looked around the gymnasium, not really wanting to look at Samara.

"Well it's not trigonometry, it's just gym. I'm not positive...but something tells me we'll be alright." Emily couldn't handle another smile. But she hadn't stop smiling since she sat down.

"You're a smart ass you know that?"

"Yep. Wanna play basketball with me?" There's that smile again. How could Emily say no. It's simple; she couldn't.

During lunch Emily had all but forgotten about Samara as she absentmindedly daydreamed about Ms. Hastings, who was only a few tables away. She observed her teacher closely, noticing her extra perk today. Perhaps she loved fridays, a chance to get away from her kids. But that couldn't be, Ms. Hastings seemed to love her students, and love teaching them even more. Why was she so giddy today? Why was she so amazing? Why was she so beautiful? Why was she so...

"Emily? Emily?" Paige was, unsuccessfully, trying to get her attention.

"You say something?"

"You think? Lunch is almost over and you haven't heard anything we've said."

"What's up with you?" Mona wanted to know. "You've been acting super weird since the first day of school. I think I know what it is." Emily panicked, Mona couldn't know, not just yet. "You got your first period, didn't you? It's okay, it's perfectly natural." Mona and Paige erupted with laughter so loud, some people nearby looked in their directions.

Emily was firetruck red. "Oh my God! NO! That's not it you idiot." They were still laughing. "You're both idiots. So what are we doing this weekend?" She desperately needed the discussion to shift topics.

"Em, you're memory is the worse, we're having all my aunts and uncles and cousins over this weekend, I told you a couple of weeks ago." Paige's family always had large gatherings. Her dad had eleven brothers and sisters. No way Emily was going near that.

"Yeah and I'm going to Connecticut for the weekend. We're visiting my grandparents."

"Great, I guess I'll just stare at my four walls, my mom is working all weekend. I won't see her til it's time to go to church on sunday."

"The house all to yourself this weekend, I'd kill for that. I'm going to be surrounded by idiots the entire time."

"Yeah Em, why don't you throw a party." Mona was being sarcastic.

"Who would come?"

"You need some more friends."

"Now Paige, why would I go get new friends when I already have the greatest friends I could have ever asked for?" Both Paige and Mona looked at each other, knowing Emily wasn't being funny, just the impossibly sweet girl they've adored all their lives.

XXX

"Hey fresh meat." Emily turned away from her locker after packing it up for the day.

"I could have sworn I told you my name."

"Yeah you did. So what you up to today? Got any plans?"

"Unfortunately no, both of my closest friends are all tied up this weekend. I'll probably just order pizza and watch Netflix."

"What a giant coincidence, I love pizza, and Netflix. So what time should you be expecting me?" Samara put on a innocent face, but Emily wasn't falling for it. But that smile...that smile was dangerous.

"I don't recall inviting you Samara."

"Call me Sammy, everyone calls me Sammy. I told you that when I kicked your butt at one on one." Emily crossed her arms and knitted her eyebrows together.

"You beat me by two points." She corrected her.

"I kicked your butt, that's my story and I'm sticking to it. So when and where are we having this pizza fresh meat?"

"Keep calling me fresh meat and I'll keep calling you Samara."

"Alright, alright, alright. Emily. I'm serious, I'd love to hang with you. I'm not busy, you're not busy, why not be not busy together?" Emily was certain that smile could get Samara in or out of almost anything, and probably did.

"You're serious?"

"Yes woman." Her smile grew. "What...you want me to beg?" She gave her directions to her house and told her to be there at six.

Emily was excited preparing for her new friend to come. She wasn't sure why, or how, but this didn't feel like just hanging out. It felt like something more. If the butterflies in her stomach was any indication, this felt like a date. Samara told her she liked plain cheese, so that's what she ordered. Samara wanted brisk iced tea, so that's what she picked up from the deli on her way home. She wanted popcorn after the pizza for their Netflix marathon, so she grabbed a pack from her cabinet and put it in the microwave. Now when they were ready, all she had to do was press start.

This wasn't a date. How could this possibly be a date? Was Samara gay? Was she maybe confused about her sexuality? Did she like Emily? No, she was just being friendly. She was better at making friends than Emily was. That had to be it. Then again she did sort of call her beautiful. Was she just being sweet? Was she...

The doorbell jolted her out of her confused state of mind. Whatever this was tonight was happening now. Emily resolved to act normal, whatever that was. This was just two new friends hanging out, that's it.

"Mind if I park my bike on your porch?" That smile, that crazy beautiful smile. Emily felt weak. "Hello, Emily, you there?" So much for behaving normal.

"Yeah...uh...that's fine, you can leave it there."

"Thanks. Nice house. You know we live just ten minute apart right?"

"No, I didn't know that."

"Welp, now ya do."

"I thought maybe your parents would drop you off, seeing as how I'm a new friend and all." Emily moved aside to allow Samara in. She closed the door behind her, in disbelief that she was really there.

"My parents are literally never home. Like...never. And they don't bother to care where I go, what I do, or who I do it with. My mom works in corporate for Septa in Philly, and my dad works on Wall Street." She walked further into the Fields' residence, finding the living room on her own, with Emily right behind her. "He's a hedge fund manager, whatever that is. So he commutes, which means he comes home like twice a week and stays at his apartment in New York the rest of the time. I don't even think they know my name."

"You don't have any brothers or sisters?"

"No, you?"

"Nope. Just me."

"Where are your parents?"

"Work. My mom is a surgeon at Rosewood community and my dad stays on Carlisle Barracks military base. But it's only two and a half hours away so my mom takes me to see him, when she has time." Emily sat, and Samara sat right beside her, legs touching. "She's...on call all weekend so...she's gonna stay at the hospital." She struggled to speak with Samara so close.

"She trusts you to be alone?"

"Yeah. Well, her best friends check up on me. Mrs. Vanderwaal, and Mrs. McCullers so... Don't your parents trust you, since they leave you so much?"

"I have a live-in nanny. She sort of just goes shopping or stays in her room. I don't tell my parents they're paying her to talk on the phone, go to the mall and get freaky with her boyfriend, and she doesn't tell them I..."

Ding-dong.

"Must be the pizza."

"Yummy. Perfect timing."

Three slices of pizza each, a bowl of popcorn, and eight episodes of Avatar: The Last Airbender later, Emily looked at the clock. It was past ten.

"I better get going, it's late."

"Sammy, it's too dark to ride your bike home."

"I've been out waaaaaay later than this. Trust me."

"Sammy..."

"What do you propose? We make this a sleepover?" Emily's heart skipped a beat just at the mention.

"Well, yeah, sure. I don't want you to get hit by a car or something."

"Good point, but I don't have any clothes. Doesn't matter I like to sleep naked anyway. Okay I'll stay, naked sleepover party!" Emily's complexion left her in an instant. She was a white as a ghost, and frozen in fear. "Whoa, I'm just kidding. I mean I do sleep naked but, I guess I could stomach wearing pajamas for one night. Got any I could borrow?"

"Uh...sure." Her color slowly returned as she got off the couch. Samara walked with her. "Don't you need to call your mom or something?"

"I guarantee you she's home, sitting in her office reading emails. She probably thinks I'm in my room. Speaking of rooms, yours is really nice."

"Thanks. But she can't be that bad." She opened her draw to find her favorite pajama set.

"To be honest with you, I'm pretty sure I was a mistake. My grandpop more than likely forced my mom to marry my dad, and they've been unhappily wed ever since. Who wants to talk to or spend time with the biggest mistake of their life?" She handed her a pair of pink shorts and a small matching tee. "Thanks. When I graduate, I'm gonna leave this place and never look back."

"So you're never going to see or talk to your parents again?" She couldn't imagine never talking to her mom or dad again. Although they were both busy with their work, they made time for her and she knew she was loved. She felt bad for her new friend.

"Never, hell what'll be the difference?" She unbuckled her belt and unbuttoned her jeans. She slid out of them, and lifted her shirt up. Emily turned away, not wanting to stare. "We never see or talk to each other now."

They made a pallet on the floor in the living room with the couch cushions and blankets from the hall closet. They never put a new episode on, they just laid on the makeshift bed and talked. It was hours before either of them left to go use the bathroom. Emily wished the conversation would never end.

"You got a boyfriend fresh meat?"

"No, Samara, I don't. Do you?"

She laughed a bit. "NO, I don't have one of those. How old are you?"

"Fourteen, I'll be fifteen in March."

"March what?"

"Fourteenth. When's your birthday?"

"It just passed, September first. I'm the big one six. I got held back a grade if you were wondering. This is my second go at tenth."

"How did that happen?" Were her ears working properly? She couldn't imagine someone as smart as Samara being held back.

"Last year I started smoking weed with my friends. It was such a magnificent escape from my life and I liked it so much that I just stopped going to school. I would just hang out and smoke weed all day. Guess I missed enough assignments and flunked all my classes. I thought Robert and Lynda would freak. Honestly," her voice got low, and her eyes were sad, "I thought, to myself it was awesome, maybe Robert and Lynda would notice that I'm alive. The whole summer came and went, they never asked to see a report card, never asked how I was coming along with school, nothing." Emily couldn't control the need to hug her. So she did.

"That's so sick. How can they ignore such a wonderful daughter."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Shoot."

"You like girls...don't you?" How did she know? Was it the hug, was it the blushing when she changed in front of her? Was it because she called her wonderful? She searched her mind questioning what gave her away. She wanted to lie, to adamantly deny liking girls, but that damn smile. Why was she smiling?

"I've never...done anything with... How did you know?"

Samara shrugged. "Like minds."

**BOOM, THERE YOU GO, ANOTHER CHAPTER : )...I'LL PROBABLY HAVE MORE FOR YOU TOMORROW. MAYBE. THANK YOUR THE REVIEWS AND ESPECIALLY THE FOLLOWS.**

**A/N: NIA PEEPLES REALLY IS MIXED WITH ALL OF THAT, I WASN'T OVER DOING IT.**

**BTW...FENDER18 I LOVE YOU! THAT IS ALL (HOPE MY UPDATING STYLE INSPIRES YOU)**


	6. AUTHOR'S NOTE

**THIS IS A WARNING...**

**HELLO EVERYONE, HOPE YOU'RE ENJOYING YOUR DAY, I KNOW I AM. I HAVE THE WHOLE DAY TO MYSELF TODAY, SO THAT MEANS I'LL BE BRINGING YOU A FEW CHAPTERS. I'LL ALSO, MORE THAN LIKELY, UPDATE "EMAYA IN LOVE", IF YOU HAVENT'T READ IT YET GIVE IT A SHOT. **

**ANYWHO, I'M WRITING THIS A/N IN RESPOSE YO A REVIEW I JUST READ:**

with the age difference (gail bait) its getting boring, and i dont think people have the patience to wait 'years' maybe you should skip a few years until it is appropriate

**THANK YOU FOR YOUR REVIEW MYSTERY PERSON : )**

**I'M SURE YOU MEANT "JAIL" AND SECONDLY, I WARNED YOU THIS STORY WOULD BE A JOURNEY. I'M NOT SURE WHICH CHAPTER, BUT I LEFT A NOTE SAYING PREPARE FOR A LONG STORY. THERE A SOOOOOO MANY THINGS THAT NEED TO HAPPEN BEFORE SPENCER AND EMILY FALL IN LOVE. **

**EMILY HAS TO BECOME A LITTLE MORE COMFORTABLE WITH HERSELF**

**SHE HAS TO SEE WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE WITH SAMARA**

**SPENCER IS STARTING A NEW RELATIONSHIP WITH MEILANI...**

**IF YOU ARE BORED, DON'T READ, I'M NOT PUTTING A GUN TO YOUR HEAD, HOWEVER, DON'T BE SO QIUCK TO THROW THE STORY AWAY, I BEILEVE THE JOURNEY IS JUST AS IMPORTANT AS THE DESTINATION. DON'T YOU?**

**ALSO THERE WILL BE PLENTY OF TIME JUMPS, AND YES IT WILL BE OVER FOUR YEARS, BUT I WON'T SKIP A TON. A MONTH HERE, SIX MONTHS THERE. SOME WILL BE A FEW WEEKS. IT'S JUST IMPORTANT TO WATCH HOW THESE CHARACTERS GROW.**

**NOW**

**FOR ANYONE READING THIS A/N AFTER I HAVE ALREADY UPDATED FUTURE CHAPTERS, IT IS UP TO YOU WHETHER OR NOT YOU WANT TO CONTINUE, IF YOU DO, HOPEFULLY YOU WON'T BE ****DISAPPOINTED. I DON'T THINK YOU WILL, I'M NOT BEING COCKY, I JUST THINK THE STORY IN MY HEAD IS WORTH READING.**

**CONTINUE OR DISCONTINUE, IT'S YOU'RE CHOICE.**

**PLEASE CONTINUE TO GIVE ME FEED BACK**

**I'LL BE UPDATING LATER ON TODAY. **

**HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY EVERYONE!**

**THANK YOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**


	7. Chapter 6

**I KNOW I PROMISED THIS YESTERDAY, BUT I COULDN'T GET IT QUITE RIGHT. SO HERE IT IS AFTER MUCH EDITING. MORE TO COME VERY SOON. **

**THIS REVIEW HAD ME LAUGHING.**

**Guest 6/10/13 . chapter 4 **

seriously! seriously! what's where the chapter ends, man that was good, is it bad that i'm rooting for Mel over Emily? fuck it, Mel's hot

**YOU CAN ROUTE FOR WHOM EVER YOU LIKE LOL AND SHE IS VERY HOT! : ) DON'T WORRY, MEL AND SPENCE WILL HAVE A EPIC LOVE STORY, BUT SPEMILY IS THE END GAME.**

**ALSO SOME OF YOU HAVE WONDERED ABOUT HANNA...I WILL BRING HER AROUND IN THE LEAST EXPECTED WAY, REMEMBER THIS IS A A/U STORY SO DON'T KILL ME. SHE WON'T BE LIKE THE HANNA WE ALL KNOW AND LOVE, JUST AS MY OTHER CHARACTERS ARE QUITE DIFFERENT. I HOPE YOU ENJOY...**

**DON'T HESTITATE TO GIVE ME YOUR FEED BACK**

**ON WITH THE STORY...**

Meilani gave her helmet to Spencer and let her curly shoulder length hair blow in the wind as her chopper zoomed down I-95. Spencer held Meilani tightly, enjoying the closeness. She'd never been on a motorcycle before, and it was as exhilarating as she imagined. She wasn't sure where or why they were headed to Philadelphia, and she didn't care. Meilani was the most intriguing person she'd met in a long while, and she wanted to be near her.

They pulled in front of the Comcast building, and Meilani shut the engine off.

"What are we doing here?" Spencer always admired the architecture of the skyscraper, but she'd never been inside.

"You said we could go anywhere I wanted, so here we are. There's something I want to show you." She took Spencer's hand into hers and walked through the entrance.

Spencer's eyes widened upon seeing the lobby. There was a wide circular, metal staircase in the middle. She could she a few storefronts and part of a restaurant as they walked by. What really caught her eye was the live imagery above the security desk.

"Isn't it stunning? That's my favorite part of coming to work everyday, I never know what's going to be on the up there." They stood and watched the stars and planets slowly moving in the galaxy. "That's a 2000 square foot LED screen. It's resolution is 500% greater than that of an HD television. Cool huh?"

"Very, I've never seen anything like this. Is this what you wanted to show me?"

"No. I have something even better. Hey Ted." Meilani waved to the guard, he nodded and returned his attention to his laptop. Spencer wondered how late Meilani usually stayed in this building if she knew the night guard by name, it was almost 10 o'clock. On the elevator, Meilani gushed about her building. "This is the tallest building in the city, the 15th tallest in the country, the 16th tallest in north america, and the 76th tallest in the whole world. Do you know where the tallest building in the world is?"

Spencer smirked. "Dubai, the Burj Khalifa. It's beautiful there."

"You've been?"

"Several times, I almost never want to leave every time I go. Aria and I, you met her,"

"Ah yes, bright eyes, remind me to thank her for her boldness later."

"Will do, well she and I have gone every summer since we graduated high school. It's kind of a tradition now." The elevator opened to a grey hall with a exit door at the end.

"After you beautiful." Spencer walked ahead of Meilani, slowly, to the red door. Her lips parted and a astonished gasp left her. There were endless buildings houses and lights, the city as far as the eyes could see. "The general public isn't allowed on the roof, but I come up here sometimes to just...get away. You can see the entire city from up here, see that?" Meilani moved behind Spencer and placed her hands on her hip and her head on her shoulder. "Straight ahead, you can see all the way to the atlantic ocean. What do you think?" She stepped in front of Spencer, whose eyes were transfixed on the view.

"I think that...I've never seen anything more beautiful in my life."

"I have." Meilani's seductive voice consumed her. No one had looked at Spencer the way she was in some time. The sensation was overwhelming.

Spencer looked at Meilani. For some moments, they said nothing, comfortably silent. Meilani lazily swept some hair out of Spencer's eyes, then put her palm to her face. They looked at each other longingly, and Spencer moved as close to Meilani as she could, their bodies gelling together. Spencer could feel Meilani's breath on her lips, noses touching, breathing slowly increasing. Meilani put her arms around Spencer's neck and licked her lips, Spencer clasped her hands together around her waist. Each movement meticulous and deliberate. Neither was in a rush and both wanted to savor the moment. One of Meilani's hand delicately took hold of the back of Spencer's neck, pulling her lips nearer, until the met. Her heart, momentarily, stopped beating. The kiss was gentle, sweet, loving. Their mouths moved in a sensual rhythm, causing Spencer to part her lips. Meilani used the opportunity to intensify the kiss. Eventually their tongues collided and massaged each other. Meilani's other hand became entangled in Spencer's long, soft locks. The pace of their lip lock still unhurried, yet powerful. They moaned into the kiss. They were submerged in a state of euphoria as the world around them disappeared. Nothing matter in this moment, expect Meilani. Nothing else could exist, expect Meilani.

For the next eight hours Spencer and Meilani alternated between making out and meaningful conversation. Neither of them saw the stars fade from the sky or dusk turn to dawn. The were both thoroughly mesmerized. The world only reappeared when the sun began to peak over the horizon. Spencer reluctantly ripped her eyes away from her date. The sun was creeping over the neck of the ocean. The sight was simply breathtaking.

"Wow. That's so...beautiful. I've never watched the sunrise with someone before." Spencer looked at Meilani, wondering how many girls she's brought here.

"Neither have I." Exactly what she wanted to hear. "You're pretty amazing, you know that? I don't think I've ever had the pleasure of meeting someone as extraordinary as you." She sighed and took both of Spencer's hands into her own. "Spencer listen, I'll be frank, I'm much older than you. I've lived a lot more life than you have, and I'm in a different head space at thirty three than you are at twenty two. There's a world of difference between us. Don't get me wrong, you're extremely mature, but I don't want to waste either of our time. At my age, I'm not looking for someone to have fun with, I'm looking for someone to potentially spend my life with."

Spencer mustered up as much seriousness as she could. "So am I."

"Okay. Good. So...if I fall for you, you'll catch me?"

A half smile appeared on Spencer's face. "My arms are already waiting." As scary as the thought of falling was, particularly atop a 58 story building, Spencer had never felt so safe.

In her car on her way home after being dropped off in front of the Grille, Spencer's mind was flooded with the memories of the past evening. It felt almost unreal, like she'd had a remarkable dream she wished would come true. But this was no dream, this was a reality and she knew Meilani was special. The type of special that only excited in fairy tales or corny romantic movies. She knew that if she wrote down all the things that would make someone perfect, Meilani would be that, and so much more. She's only felt this once in her life, and that ended in misery. Spencer quickly shook off the negative memories of her first, and only love, only to have her mind dominated with Meilani again. They had only just met, and only had one date, but this was exceptional, it was rare. People like Meilani are hard to find, and it was just her luck that her pushy best friend spotted the gorgeous Hawaiian. She would have to thank Aria later. At the moment she was on her way home to shower and sleep. She and her new companion had made plans to have a late lunch together after getting some much needed rest. They'd been awake the whole night giving each other their undivided attention, neglecting the human need for slumber. They could barely part ways from the roof top until well past 8 o'clock. She didn't really want to sleep, because at the moment, her reality was better than any dream she could dream.

**I KNOW, A LITTLE SHORT, BUT I'LL HAVE MORE LATER, PROMISE.**


	8. Chapter 7

Samara was still asleep when Emily woke up around noon. The rest of the evening was spent with Emily interrogating Samara about her sexuality. What does it mean to be gay? How can you even be sure? Had she had sex? With how many girls? What was it like? How about boys? What was the difference? Do her parents know? How did she come out? Was she scared? How does sex even work with two girls? This went on until very early in the morning. Samara had drifted off to sleep answering her last question, and that was the one she was most curious about. Emily was thankful to have someone, who was a little older and experienced, to talk to. Paige was really sweet and understanding, but she certainly couldn't understand nor explain the complexities of lesbian sex. So she felt like she had no one to satisfy her growing curiosity. As luck would have it, her new friend not only identified as gay but had plenty to share on the subject.

She wasn't shy either. Emily envied how openly and casually she'd answers her questions. Samara knew she was gay from a very young age. She treated and looked at girls differently than boys. When all her classmates had a crush on Tyler Washington, she couldn't keep her eyes off his twin sister, Taylor. Obviously she didn't immediately reconize it as homosexuality but, once she found out what "gay" meant, she realized that's what she was. She wasn't scared or nervous, quite the opposite, she was eager and anxious to get her hands on the cutest girl in her ninth grade class. With her unmistakable wit, and disarming smile, she had the girl wrapped around her finger in less than a week. Actually that's how all her "conquests" ended up. She told Emily about the only boy she's ever had sex with. She was curious and wanted to make sure she was making the right choices, or wasn't going through a phase. So, she did it. It was painful and over in an instant. His kisses were rough and too sloppy. He didn't know how or where to touch her. There was no doubt in her mind that girls were the right thing for her. Now she's never going to have to wonder, or listen to stupid boys tell her she's gay because she hadn't had a guy. She did, and it just didn't feel right. Not just the awful sexual experience, everything about it felt wrong. Emily knew she would take her advice of not trying a guy to prove something to herself or anyone else. "You don't need to have sex with a guy to know you're gay Emily. Do boys have sex with other boys to know they're straight?" She had a good point, and besides Emily didn't want a guy, she wanted Ms. Hastings.

Fortunately or unfortunately, however one may look at it, her parents acted indifferent to her coming out. They told her she was her own person free to make any decision for her life she wished. Most gay teenagers would kill to have their parents react like that, but Samara was pained that yet another thing in her life was being ignored. She sat them down at the kitchen table on a rare night when they were both home. She stated simply that her interests were in the same sex. Of course they could care less. She told Emily detail for detail, one by one, all six of the girls she had sex with. The sensualness of it, how soft it was. How the taste of a woman is familiar but somehow varied from person to person. Emily's cheeks flushed a deep red when Samara told her how much she enjoyed sex with a woman sex. How wet it got was they sexiest thing. Second only to hearing a her moan, she declared that nothing compared to the sound of a woman moaning. Emily wanted to know how exactly to make another woman moan, but instead inquired on how it "works", being too shy to ask what she really wanted to. But the sandman took a hold of Samara before she could get into it. Much to the chagrin of a very curious, wide awake Emily. She sat motionless and silent for a few beats, absorbing everything she'd just heard. As much as she desired to hear more, she would just have to wait until the morning.

X

As Samara slept, Emily busied herself in the kitchen cooking a filling breakfast. Homemade waffles, turkey bacon, scrambled eggs, and freshly squeezed orange juice. The smell of home cooking woke the newest addition to her life.

"I don't remember the last time someone cooked for me." Samara entered the kitchen yawning and giving her limbs a good stretch.

"Oh hey, good morning. How'd you sleep?"

"Great. What's for breakfast?"

"Waffles, bacon, eggs. Nothing special." Emily held a plate out for her.

"It smells so good." Samara said leaning her head to breath in the aroma. She lifted her head and was only inches from Emily's face. Emily never noticed the small cluster of freckles on her nose and under her eyes. Those freckles, those luscious lips, those limpid pool of blue eyes, that provocative smile. There was no denying her beauty. After looking at one another, at lost for words for a few moments, Samara took her plate. "Thanks fresh meat."

"No need to thank me Samara, you're my guest."

"Sammy."

"No it's Emily." She said pointing at herself.

"Ah, so someone's becoming a smart ass. Good thing you're learning from the best."

All during breakfast Emily wanted to pick up where they left off last night, but she thought against it figuring it wouldn't be appropriate over eggs. Once they'd finished and Emily cleaned up, she attempted to restart the conversation from the night before.

"So Sammy...we were, uh...last night we..."

"Still have more questions huh?" Samara was quick, and Emily liked it.

"Well, yeah."

"So..."

"Last night, before you dozed off, you were gonna tell me about...how to...what to do with a..."

"How to pleasure a woman?"

"Yeah." Emily felt so small at that breakfast table.

"Hmmm, lets see. Where to start? Okay, you have to take your time. Girls don't like to be rushed. They like it when you warm them up first." Emily's brow indicated she had no clue what "warming up" meant. "You have to rev up her engine, get her juices flowing. You know, foreplay."

"Ohhhh...how do I do that?"

"Are you...is there someone you want to have sex with?"

"I've never even kissed a girl. In fact you're only the second person I've ever talked to about this. It's just that...I know this information can be useful...in the future."

"Hmmm, okay." Samara said skeptically.

"Most guys, from my own experience, and what my friends have told me, don't really care about foreplay. They like to dive right in, maybe because they're horny idiots or maybe because they're selfish lovers, maybe both I don't know. But women, they don't want you to just stick it in, they want to be...how do I say this? They want you to make their temperature rise, so to speak. Slowly. Lots of kissing and lots of touching. Girls are turned on by what they hear so it's also good to throw in a few compliments in between kisses."

"Like?"

"Tell her how sexy she is, and what you can't wait to do to her. Lick her all over and kiss her gently. You don't want to be too soft though, there has to be a bit of aggression and passion there. What I like most about sex with girls is how sensual it is. But it can't be too soft, or timid. She's gotta know you want her. All women like different things so pay very close attention to her body, listen to it, and respond. How does it feel under your touch? What are the things that make her arch her back? Back arching is definitely a good sign. And when she bites her lip. Also if she tries to run from you. And if you can make her toes curl, you're doing great." Emily listened, regretting not bringing a pen and a piece of paper. "You probably want to have sex with a girl who has experience. That way you can let her do you first then you can sort of mimic what she does."

"I see. You said you weren't nervous the first time you had sex, why?"

"I don't know, I was just...excited. I couldn't wait to get her clothes off and explore her body."

"But you didn't know what you were doing."

"Well I more or less did." She shrugged. "I mastered the art of masturbation a long time ago. Since she had the same eqiupment as me I just did what I know I liked. As far as oral, well I had to feel my way around, but I had fun learning." Samara smirked at the memory but noticed Emily's discomfort. "Hey, was that too much?"

"No, not at all. It's just that I never...touched myself before."

"What?! How is that even possible? Aren't you curious? Shit, aren't you horny?" Samara laughed causing Emily to throw a banana from the fruit bowl. "Hey!" Now she was laughing hysterically. "I'm just asking a question."

"Yeah, I guess I'm curious."

"You seem _plenty_ curious to me Emily." She stopped and looked to be in meanigful thought before she spoke again. "How about I teach you?"

"Teach me what?"

"Everything I know. Life is the best teacher, and I could show you better than I could tell you."

Emily wasn't sure if she was kidding or not. She didn't look to be kidding, her face was still as stone. What exactly was she offering? "Show me?" She asked slowly.

"Yeah. Everyone expects their first time to be this special magical moment with their one true love. That's not life Emily, that's fairytale bullshit. And you're first time is _never_ magical, it's awkward and can be scary at times. If you wanna know how to please this girl you're obviously smitten with I could show you, teach you all my tricks. Then when you do have your 'first time' it _will_ be special. And you'll know how to make her scream. Which by the way, is also a good thing." She gave Emily a wink, and she realized she wasn't kidding, she meant every word.

_How did she know there was a girl?_ "Are you suggesting you show me how to have sex by having sex with me? Like a tutorial?"

"Pretty much, yeah. It would be devoid of pressure or expectations and I could instruct you. Then we'll be best friends forever because you'll be eternally grateful I showed you how to give a chick a mind blowing orgasm." Although she had a wide smile on her face, her words were serious. Emily thought about it for a minute as Samara ate the banana that was tossed at her head.

"Are you serious or are you messing with me?" She had to be sure.

"I'm very serious."

"Why would you do that for me Sammy?"

"It's not like it would be a chore. You really are beautiful. And so sweet. Any girl would be lucky to have you, and even more lucky if you were skilled at cunnilingus." Once again Emily didn't know what she was talking about and Samara could see it on her face. She chuckled. "Oral sex, fresh meat. Cunnilingus is the performance of oral sex on a woman."

"So if I say okay, when would we...?"

"Whenever you feel comfortable."

**I KNOW, ANOTHER SHORT ONE BUT IT NEEDED TO BE. I HAVE SO MUCH IN MY HEAD I CAN'T GET IT DOWN FAST ENOUGH. MAYBE IF YOU'RE GOOD. I'LL GIVE YOU 4 CHAPTERS IN A ROW OPPOSE TO MY USUAL 3. I CAN'T WAIT TO GET TO A CERTAIN CHAPTER SO I'LL BE WRTING FOR THE REMAINDER OF THE DAY : )...**

**I'M NOT SURE WHERE I'LL GO WITH SAMARA AND EMILY, MAYBE THEY END UP A COUPLE MAYBE THEY DON'T? WHAT DO Y'ALL THINK/WANT?**

**PLEASE REVIEW**

**THANKYOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**


	9. Chapter 8

**THANK YOU ALL SOOOOO MUCH. WOW 104 FOLOWERS. WELL HERE YOU GO. I'M CLOSE TO CHAPTER 11. THAT'S THE ONE TO LOOK OUT FOR. HOPEFULLY I'LL GET THAT TO YOU SOON. ONCE AGAIN THANK YOU : )**

**FLASHBACK IN ITALICS...**** THIS CHAPTER IS A LITTLE SAD. YOU'VE BEEN WARNED.**

There was a knock on Spencer's door. Then it opened. Only one other person had a key, and that was her best friend. Aria excitedly skipped over to the couch where Spencer was sitting, jumped on her straddling her thighs, and threw her arms around her neck. She began placing kisses all over Spencer's face.

"Muah, muah, muah muah. Spency, I've missed you! Muah, muah muah." She continued her kisses and then squeezed Spencer's neck. Spencer held her best friend as close as she possibly could. She knew no one, aside from her family, loved her as much as Aria. Their bond was special, strong, and everlasting. Aria had always been very affectionate, but when she missed Spencer, she couldn't help giving her extra kisses. "Muah, Spency, where in the world have you been." Spencer giggled at her best friend's pout and the use of her childhood nickname.

"I told you, Mel works like a dog and she's been on vacation the last past week so, I've been with her. Actually this is her last day and we're spending it together." She told Aria, who was still holding on tight to her neck.

"Oh. Well can I have my best friend back when she goes back to work tomorrow?"

"I'm all yours munchkin."

"Yay!" She nuzzled into Spencer's neck. They sat like that for a few moments until Aria decided to gwt up and raid her fridge. "What you got to eat."

"What do I _have_ to eat?" She corrected her.

"I'm not one of your students _Ms. Hastings_."

"You don't have food in your apartment?"

"When do I ever, you always feed me. I've been starving these last nine days."

Spencer laughed and shook her head at Aria. "Come on, let's go to Wal-Mart."

"I thought your new honey was coming by."

"She is, but I have time to take you food shopping. I can't have you wasting away. You're already skin and bones." Spencer teased.

"Shut up jerk! Let's go."

X

"Soooo...y'all fuck yet?"

"No Aria." Spencer groaned out.

"Why not, you two have been spending so much time together." Aria put ten cans of sliced pineapples in their cart.

"Do you really need all those?"

"Don't avoid my question."

"Honestly, we've just been getting to know one another. We haven't even had a conversation about sex."

"But you told me y'all got hot and heavy on the rooftop." Aria said, confused.

"Actually, it was incredibly romantic and sweet. It wasn't...lustful. It was meaningful.

"Holy shit!" Aria exclaimed as a few shoppers look in their direction. Spencer grabbed her to walk over to the cereal aisle.

"Watch your mouth munchkin. You might run into one of the parents of your students, this is a small town."

"Okay okay, but I haven't seen that look in your eye since..." She trailed off not wanting to ruin the mood by saying her name.

"I know. Mel is special."

"Holy shit." She repeated, not as loud.

"What is wrong with you woman?"

"You haven't used the "S" word in..." Once again she didn't want to bring up her ex, but she was quite enthused that her best friend finally found someone she like.

"Exactly. That's why I'm not rushing the sex thing. I want to see where this could go. I think she could be..."

"The one?" Aria asked cutting her off.

"I don't know yet. I'm trying to find out so just relax."

"When do I get to meet the new Mrs. Spencer Hastings?"

"I wouldn't go that far just yet. Uh, I don't know. I'll try to see if I could tie her down for an evening next week. Her first week back is going to be hectic so even I won't be seeing too much of her. But we'll see, I'll try to arrange something."

"Awesome!"

"So how are things going with you and cute butt?"

"Might I say his butt is even cuter without any clothes on it." Her smile was wicked.

"You two did the nasty?"

"Yep."

"How was it?"

"The best I've ever had."

"No."

"Yes. Except for Camilla, no one can do what that woman can." Aria shuddered thinking about her former lover. "But as far as guys. Oh my goodness, he was amazing. He's a very generous lover. He made sure I had two orgasms before he even stuck it in."

"Impressive."

"Indeed."

"Do...you like him."

"Actually...um, I think I do. Should I get pop-tarts?" Aria never liked anyone and Spencer knew it. She knew she shouldn't push further, knowing, when she was ready, Aria would come to her.

She couldn't believe all the junk food Aria had got, but Spencer threw in some items to make healthy meals. She knew if she didn't cook them for her, Aria would never eat them. They finished up shopping and headed to check out. The lines were pretty long, but Spencer expected nothing less on a Sunday.

"Wait here, I'll go grab us some gossip magazines."

"Aria I don't..." Before her sentence was finished, Aria was at the magazine rack.

"Are you serious?" Aria's raised voice caused a few of the customers to look at her questioningly, as did Spencer.

"What is it?" She asked as Aria came back over with a look of disgust on her normally smiling face.

"Look who they chose for this years number one Maxim hot 100. They couldn't have picked someone better than her?" Aria handed her the magazine and Spencer's mouth began to water. There she was, her ex girlfriend, looking delectable in a barely there white bikini. She looked the hottest Spencer had ever seen her. Aria snatched the mag from her hands and opened to the article, snapping Spencer out of her less than respectable thoughts. "Oh my goodness, she is such a filthy fucking liar!"

"Aria, your mouth." Spencer warned. "How is she such a liar?"

"Look right there." She pointed to the second question on the page. "She got asked what's her perfect guy, what does he have to do to get her attention. What she should have said was lose his dick and grow a pair of tits. Instead she lists all this bullsh..." Aria caught herself. "She's such a bit..um...you know what we should do?"

"What's that Aria?" She was beyond annoyed.

"We should out her. It would ruin her career." Aria was scowling while still skimming over the article.

"That's a terrible thing to do to someone, even her. Besides she wouldn't be ruined, she'd probably get more job offers. Lesbianism is not deemed unacceptable in hollywood, in fact they celebrate it. And everyone thinks it's hot."

"Yeah, that may be true, but she's gone to great lengths to hide the fact that she's a flaming homosexual for a reason. I think people have a right to know that the chick movies they're flocking to is a deceitful prick." She was fuming.

"Aria, that's not your or my concern, just hand me that." She took the magazine from her and sat it back on the rack. She took one last look at the exquisite body she used to make passionate love to and proceeded in the already moving line.

X

Spencer helped Aria put her groceries away, gave her a peck on the lips and left to get ready for her date. She took the two flights of stairs, down to her own floor, slowly. Her mind was engrossed in a battle over the woman on the magazine cover Aria was so up in arms about.

_Damn she looked sexy. I actually miss her, I shouldn't though. She's been out of my life for some time now. She did look really good though. Doesn't matter, I've got Mel now, my focus should be on her. Yeah fuck..._

"Hey beautiful." The deep, raspy voice of Meilani jarred her out from her thoughts.

"Hey you." She blushed, as she always did anytime she was called beautiful by the figure standing before her. Meilani pulled her in for one of her patented slow kisses. Every time she kissed those lips, her mind went blank and body went numb. "I'm sorry I lost track of time, I didn't mean to make you wait, I had to help my friend with something."

"You're a good friend, don't ever apologize for being there for your loved ones." She kissed Spencer again, and both of their worlds started to spin.

"We...should...I have to get ready." Out of breath, and fearing she'd be unable to stop, she opened her apartment door. "I won't be long, please make yourself at home."

"Take your time beautiful." She rarely called her Spencer, and she liked it that way.

X

"Ready. What are we doing today?"

"I was thinking we'd catch a movie and go to eat after."

"Sounds perfect. Anything in particular you want to see?"

"Yeah, that new vampire movie looks good." Spencer tried hard to not react. "I read somewhere the actress who stars in it actually wrote it."

"Yeah, I heard that too. When's the next showtime?"

X

The movie started and Spencer wasn't sure how to relax. She was at the movies with her new, well sort of girlfriend, watching her ex girlfriend take a bite out of an unsuspecting victim's neck. She had never seen one of her movies with anyone else much less a date. She tried her best to enjoy the movie, which was actually quite intriguing. She knew her ex was a talented writer, but the plot was much deeper than the trailer conveyed. Halfway through the film Meilani startled her with a question.

"She's sexy isn't she?" That was too much for Spencer.

"She's my ex." Spencer blurted out, her mouth working faster than her brain. But she couldn't stomach Meilani thinking her ex girlfriend was "sexy".

"What?"

"That's my ex, the one who went to USC with Aria and me. The one who broke my heart."

Meilani looked at the screen at the beautiful actress ripping a demon apart. She pointed to the screen. "That's her?"

"That's her."

"What didn't you tell me?" Spencer thought back to the amazing night they'd spent on the roof of the Comcast building. She spilled her guts about her ex, but neglected to mention who she was.

_Yet another long, slow, passionate kiss had Spencer's head in a whirlwind, and her body on fire. No one had ever taken such time and paid so much attention to her mouth. Meilani broke the kiss first. Much like all of their kisses, Spencer was left reeling. When she came to, she smiled at the beautiful woman she was spending her night on a rooftop with. Neither had a clue what time it was and neither cared. Meilani was the first to speak._

_"I've told you about my two epic love stories, so...have you ever been in love?"_

_"Once."_

_"Just once, uh oh."_

_"What's wrong."_

_"They say you only get three loves in life. Your first, your great, and your true. That means I gotta end this date and wait for you to come across your second."_

_"Or you could be my great and true all wrapped in one." For the first time during their date Meilani blushed._

_"Perhaps. So tell me about her."_

_"That's such a long sad story."_

_"Beautiful, we're on a rooftop in the middle of the night, where am I going? Do you have somewhere you need to be?"_

_"No."_

_"The way I see it, I have plenty of time to listen to your long, sad story."_

_"Okay then. I thought I was in love with Toby. We knew each other since kindergarten. He used to put dirt in my hair, and we used to get into as much as we possibly could without getting caught. We would wrestle and he'd run and tell on me when I'd beat him up." Spencer smiled thinking about the bond that could never be broken. "He was my best friend until I met Aria, then we became like the three amigos. We were inseparable. When we turned twelve, he asked me to be his girlfriend. I didn't know, but Aria told me I should because he was "sexy", how she knew what that was is beyond me, but that's Aria for you. So I said yes, the three of us still were never apart. It was like nothing changed, except Toby and I making out._

_When high school started, we had been together for almost two years , and still going strong. We hadn't had sex or anything but there was definitely some heavy petting." She paused. "I knew I loved him, but I also knew there wasn't any...fire. I liked kissing him, but only because I liked the contact, and I liked his companionship. But there was never any fire there. Obviously I didn't know that at the time. It was January of our sophomore year, and we were four months away from our third anniversary. I knew in my heart that I was attracted to girls, often I fantasized about them while making out with Toby. But I never said anything, I didn't dare break up with him. Our moms were already planning our wedding. So I just kept everything inside. So like I said it was January and it was our first day back after winter break. For the first time in my life I felt that thing I always knew was missing with Toby. I was head over heels before I knew what hit me the moment we laid eyes on each other. She smiled at me, and I was done for."_

_Spencer had to fight back the tears welling inside her eyes, she didn't want Meilani to see her so vulnerable so early on in their courtship. She closed her eyes, took a deep breath and continued._

_"Later on that day, I walked into science class and there she was. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. I'm not sure what came over me but I went and sat right next to her. She looked at me and that...that was the end of Toby and me. We couldn't keep our eyes off each other, we were smiling like fools, not even paying attention to the lesson. After class I got her number and she told me I better call." Spencer chuckled remembering how forward she was. "She didn't have to worry, I was chomping at the bit to get home and call her. Toby, Aria and I normally hung out after school, but I made up some excuse and got home as fast as I could. She answered on the first ring, we talked on the phone til like five in the morning. The only reason I went to bed is because we had school in three hours."_

_"Did you break up with Toby after that?"_

_"The next day. He and Aria lived in the same neighborhood we all grew up in but, when my parent's law firm took off they moved Melissa and me to a condo in center city. So we would all me up at 30th street terminal, then make our way to school together. On the train I told Aria I had something really important to tell Toby, so she put her headphones on and sat a few rows behind us. I told him I was madly in love, with a girl. I apologized repeatedly and told him we couldn't be together anymore. I told him it wasn't fair to either of us. He was so mad, he walked to the next train car, then the next."_

_"Wow. What happened when you saw him at school?" Meilani was very interested in Spencer's retelling._

_"He didn't come to school that day, or the next two. I saw him on friday and he would barely look at me."_

_"How did Aria react?"_

_"She was sad that she wasn't going to be the maid of honor and best man at our wedding. Don't even get me started on how she was suppose to pull that off. Anyway, she wasn't thrilled, Toby was her best friend too. But she hugged me for hours while I bawled my eyes out thinking I lost one of my very best friends. Aria ended up doing the opposite of what I thought and told me she didn't care who I dated, just as long as I was happy. And sexually satisfied." Spencer laughed out loud remembering Aria's words._

_"She said that?" She asked a little taken aback._

_"Among other things. That's just how my munchkin is. She has no filter, and she's very comfortable with sexuality."_

_"What about Toby, you said he wouldn't look at you, but tonight you told me he's one of your closest friends."_

_"When he found out, from Aria, that we were moving away for school, he came over to my condo in the middle of the night, in the most dramatic fashion. It was raining and he didn't have an umbrella, so when I opened the door he was soaking wet and out of breath. I still had a ton of his clothes so I let him dry off, get dressed and we drank hot chocolate by the fireplace. We talked forever and made up, we've been back to being best friends ever since. He flew out to me the second Aria told him about the breakup, he was so kind and just...just Toby. He's the best."_

_"So what happened next?"_

_"She and I spent every waking moment together. I was spellbound, she was incredible and I was in love. Almost three years with Toby and he barely made it past first base. A week with her, and we couldn't wait to make love, and we didn't. We did it everywhere, all the time. At school, at her house, my condo, the movies, dressing rooms, literally anywhere and everywhere. I was so happy. She told me her dream was to go to USC film school, that there was no other school for her, so she wouldn't be applying to any other schools. So neither did I. Aria applied to Cal, USC, and UCLA. She knew I'd get in and she wanted to be close just in case USC rejected her."_

_"There were no other schools that she wanted to go to?"_

_"Aria didn't care what college she attended. She had two criteria, parties and me. Where ever I was, she was gonna be. And vice versa. We can't be apart from one another, I think we're sick." Meilani laughed. "We just love each other so much, she's like the sister I wished I had, she's my person."_

_"Awww."_

_"Shut up!" They laughed and Spencer finished her story. "So there we were, three and a half years together, we'd finished freshman year and Aria and I were in Dubai. I thought we were going to get married. I would be a teacher and she would be an actress, and we'd have babies and be a perfect little family. She had been going on auditions like crazy since we moved to LA. She got a few commercials and a few speaking roles on network shows but nothing major. When I got back from Dubai, she jumped in my arms and kissed me so fiercely, I just thought she missed me. She barely let me get in the shower before coming in and...we made love for hours. After we were both exhausted, we laid in each other's arms and she asked me how I liked the celebration. I asked her what in the world she was talking about. She told me we had just celebrated her getting her first starring movie role. I jumped up and down on the bed I was so excited. I called Aria and she brought over way too much tequila."_

_"So she made it? She's famous now?" Spencer nodded. "Who is she?"_

_"Please don't make me say." Her voice was barely a whisper. "I'm sorry I just don't say her name, her name is never to be spoken."_

_"Don't apologize beautiful, I didn't mean to pry, go on."_

_"Well she filmed the movie, hired an agent and a manager, got a ton of offers, and dropped out of school. The movie came out and it was a huge success. She was catapulted into fame. It was so hard seeing her face everywhere. Anyway, when she got done filming her first movie she came home. She woke me up out my sleep and her eyes were so sad. She told me she cheated on me while she was filming in Vegas. I cried for I don't know how long, then I told her we could work it out. That's when she told me she didn't want to, that she "can't be gay in this business." It would be "bad for her image." So she left, she left everything behind, she didn't even give me a chance to beg her to stay. She just walked out on me." She tried hard but she couldn't help the one lone tear that fell from her eye._

_"That's so fucked up."_

_"Tell me about it." They were quiet for a bit until Meilani spoke again._

_"I'm sorry all of that happened."_

_"It's life..."_

"You could have told me, I would have never brought you to this movie had I known she was the ex you were talking about. Why didn't you say anything?"

"Mel, I wanted to see this movie. I would have come alone had you not suggested it. I've seen all her movies, she's a very talented actress and I'm very proud of her."

"You're a better woman than me Spencer Hastings."

"That's highly debatable." They kissed a slow, loving kiss, the rest of the movie.

**I REALLY VALUE YOUR FEED BACK. DON'T HESITATE TO GIVE IT. **

**BTW FOLLOW ME ON INSTAGRAM DEETHEPOET**


	10. Chapter 9

**AN: NANI IS "BEAUTIFUL" IN HAWAIIAN**

"What do you want for Christmas nani?"

"I'm not sure." Spencer watched her girlfriend, who was preparing one of her favorite Hawaiian dishes, portobello mushroom burgers, with grilled pineapple, while sitting at the kitchen bar.

"I've been asking you for over a month now and you still don't know?"

"Mel, I have everything I want. So why don't we just spend Christmas together drinking Aria's special eggnog. We can roast chestnuts on an open fire too." Spencer giggled as her girlfriend gave her a stern look. "Baby, I grew up privileged to say the least. We always had over the top extravagant Christmas', I'm sort of over it."

"So you don't have any plans?"

"Don't you think I would have told you by now? Christmas is less than two weeks away. Is there anything in particular I could get you?"

"You could come to Hawaii with me." Spencer had known for some time that her girlfriend was going to visit her family for the holidays, but this was the first time she asked her to join her. She wasn't expecting to be invited after only three months of dating, so she was indifferent towards her leaving. The only thing she felt was a little sad to be away from the woman she had yet to tell she loved.

"Are you for real? You want me to come with you?"

"Yes. I've been thinking about it and...I really want you to meet my makuahine and my kaikunāne ā he kaikuahine lāua." Meilani often spoke in her native tongue and Spencer loved learning new languages so she threw herself into learner how to communicate with her.

"I'd love to meet your mom and your brothers and sisters. Only if you're absolutely sure though."

"I'm sure nani." Meilani left the stove to pick Spencer up and kiss her beautiful lips.

X

Spencer made a habit of arriving for work at 7am everyday. It gave her time to herself to mentally prepare for the day ahead. On this particular day she heard a piano being played on her way to class. She walked over to the music room entrance and saw her favorite student, Emily Fields, practicing. She almost turned to walk away but Emily started to sing. She began to belt out "Always on my mind" by Willie Nelson. She didn't sing it like him though. Her rendition was full of soul. Spencer was shocked to hear such a big voice come from such a quiet, reserved girl. And she hit notes most singers only dream of. Spencer didn't want to disturb her so she thought to slipped past the music room and go to class. But not before Emily sung the very last note.

The friday before winter break was covered in snowflakes. Spencer couldn't have been happier. She was going to Hawaii with Meilani and she was hoping to see some snow before she left. While Spencer sat at her desk grading papers she heard a knock at her door, she checked the time on her phone. It was 7:32am.

"Come in." Emily Fields walked in with tupperware in her hand. "Emily, what in the world are you doing here so early? School doesn't start for another forty five minutes."

"Oh...I just like to come a little early and...well I find somewhere to sit and have breakfast, alone."

"Why would you want to have breakfast all by yourself?" Spencer motioned for Emily to take a seat in the chair next to her desk. Emily placed her book bag on the floor and sat.

"Well...I spend practically every waking moment with my best friends, so I just like to take a little me time. Is that weird?"

"Absolutely not. I know exactly what you mean actually. My best friend, Ms. Montgomery, the art teacher, we've been friends since we were eight. We've never been away from each other more than a few days. We went to elementary, middle, high school, and college together. Now we work at the same school, I can't escape her if I tried." Spencer began to laugh, but thought about how Aria was just as important as one of her limbs. "But I really couldn't imagine my life without her, I don't think I'd be able to function properly."

"Yeah, I feel the same way about Paige, Mona, and Sammy, but everyone needs a little 'me time' right?"

"Indeed. Was there something you needed? Besides your me time?"

"No, actually, I baked too many muffins this morning and I came to see if you wanted one." Emily hadn't baked too many, she wanted an excuse to talk to Ms. hastings, alone. Since school started, she found any excuse to sit and talk to her crush. She opened the lid that contained the muffins and placed them in front of her teacher

"Mmmm...they smell so good." Emily's heart throbbed as Ms. Hastings closed her eyes and inhaled the fresh baked goods. "Are these blueberry?"

"Huh?"

"The muffins, they're blueberry right?"

"Yes, do you not like blueberry?"

"No, I don't. I LOVE blueberry anything. Thank you so much."

"You're welcome." Emily watched as her teacher picked up a muffin, picked off a small piece with her hand and popped it into her mouth.

"Oh my God, Emily. This is the best muffin I've ever tasted in my life."

"Really?"

"Are you kidding me, like you don't know your muffins are incredible." She put the muffin to her mouth and took a big bite. "Mmmm, this is delicious. Mmmm...so good, simply amazing." Spencer complemented Emily's baking skills with every bite. It didn't take her too long to finish off the muffin and look at the container with desire. "Emily, wow that was perfect, it was soft and moist, with just enough blueberries. Not too much not too little. You're a really good baker."

Emily couldn't control the blush that spread across her face. "Thank you." She said sheepishly. "I love to cook more than bake though. I think I want to be a chef, maybe open my own restaurant."

"Really? Not a singer?"

Emily panicked, how did Ms. Hastings know she liked to sing? "Um...why would you think I would want that?"

"Because I heard you singing the other morning. You're not fooling anyone, you come to school early to get in the music room, don't you?" Spencer asked her student while eyeing the muffins.

"I...uh...not really, I just wandered in there. That's all. Take another one." Emily lifted the container towards her teacher, desperately wanting to talk about anything else.

"Oh no I shouldn't, put that lid back on because if you don't I might eat these last three."

She put the lid back on grateful to have distracted her beautiful teacher. "Ms. Hastings, why don't you just take these, eat them later."

"You sure?" Spencer asked happily.

"Yeah, take them."

"Thank you, and Emily, if it isn't school hours, you don't have to call me Miss. Please, call me Spencer."

"Really?" Spencer. Her name was Spencer, what a beautifully unique name.

"Sure. So not only do you cook, bake, sing, but you play a mean piano too. You're very talented."

"I don't know about that...Spencer." Emily couldn't control the fire that was burning throughout her body. She feared she would spontaneously combust.

"You know what you should do?" Emily shook her head, "You should go home, bake a confidence pie, and eat it." Emily couldn't stop her giggle before it escaped her lips, Spencer joined her. "Seriously Emily, you're far too modest. You sound better than half of these girls with record deals. Ever think about being an entertainer?"

"Well...yeah...but I could never get up on stage and perform in front of people. I'd probably puke all over the audience or forget all the lyrics. I'd rather be in the kitchen where no one can see me." Emily lowered her head, afraid of what she might see in Spencer's eyes. To her surprise, Spencer took her chin in her hand and lifted until their eyes met.

"Emily, I don't want to hear you talking like that ever again, do you understand me? You are a talented, beautiful young lady, who should believe in herself." Spencer let go of Emily's chin, but there was a lingering sensation where her hand just was. She rifled through some papers and handed one to her student. "And you're pretty darn smart too. I don't have a ton of teaching experience, but from what I do know, I've never had someone understand Shakespeare like you. This is a comprehensible, organized, well written essay Emily. Great job. I can't give it to you yet though, you have to wait until I pass it out." Emily handed to A+ essay back with a huge grin on her face. "Just believe in yourself, a little confidence can go a long way, trust me."

"Thanks Spencer." She was in love.

X

In the months since the offer was made, Emily and Samara never discussed it again. Although there were tons sleepovers that occurred there after, neither brought it up. Some with Samara, Paige and Mona. Some with just she and Emily, some with Samara's friends, but neither talked about the proposition that was made. Emily almost thought it was forgotten about, but she knew better. Samara was staying with the Fields' for winter break because her parents were going on Safari in Africa. When Emily asked why she didn't take the opportunity to be alone with her parents, she told her it was because she would be alone with them that she didn't want to go. Pam Fields adored Samara, and loved having her over. She practically insisted that she stay the two and a half weeks her parents were out of the country.

On Saturday morning Emily woke up on their usual pallet in the living room. She went into the kitchen to get breakfast started to see her mom left her a note.

Dear Emmy,

There's breakfast waiting for you two in the microwave. You girls behave yourself, I shouldn't be home no later than 7am tomorrow. Make sure you're up and getting reading for church..

I love you

Mom

Emily sighed, she didn't really like going to church. Maybe it was just her church she didn't like. The people were old fashioned and the Pastor was boring. He never talked about anything she wanted to hear. The sermons mostly consisted of all the evil wicked things they better not do or they'd be sent to the eternal fire. Emily didn't fully agree with everything she learned in church. She did believe you shouldn't lie, and you should treat people right. But she couldn't bring herself to think that just because she was attracted to another human being, who happened to be the same sex, she was going to hell. She figured if she was a good person who believed in Christ, then she would see him one day. She tossed the note in the trash and ran into the living room. She flung herself onto her sleeping friend.

"Wakey wakey!"

"Ugh...sleepy, sleepy."

"Come on Sammy, I don't want to eat breakfast by myself." Emily pulled all the covers off of Samara. "Get up!"

Breakfast was uneventful, except for the few playful insults they hurled at one another. Samara had been asking for weeks now to spill the beans about her crush, but Emily stayed tight lipped, even when she got teased. They showered, bundled up and went for a walk around the neighborhood.

"Wanna come to my house? You rarely ever come over." Samara faked a pout.

"Everytime I try you yell at me." Emily laughed as they headed in the direction of Samara's house.

"That's because there's someone always there, it's completely empty for the next two weeks." The only thing Samara disliked more than her parents, was being anywhere near them, so she was excited to go home.

"We're already going in that direction, why not?" Emily picked up some snow and hurled it at Samara's head.

"I'm gonna get you!" Samara started to run towards Emily, who tried to evade her oncoming attack, but wasn't fast enough. Samara tackled her into a large pile of snow and threw a little on her. They rolled around in the pile laughing, stuffing snow in each other's faces.

"Ow, you got snow in my eye, ouch."

"Oh Em, I'm sorry, you okay?" The last thing Samara would ever want to do was hurt her Emily. She had grown very fond of her the last few months. They were practically inseparable. It was pretty safe bet that if you saw Samara, Emily wasn't far behind, and vice versa.

"Got ya!" Emily smashed the ball of snow she had hidden in her right hand on top of Samara's head. She looked stunned and began kneading Emily's sides causing her laughter to become uncontrollable. "No, no stop, don't tickle me. I'm sorry...I'll never do it again...stop...stop." She begged between laughs. Samara was on top of her now, attacking her neck.

"Say I'm the queen of the world and you're my loyal subject, and I'll stop."

"Okay...okay, you're the queen of the world and I'm you loyal subject!" She stopped tickling her and they stared at each other out of breath. Samara couldn't handle waiting anymore, every sleepover, she was on the verge of kissing Emily, but she didn't want to make her uncomfortable. After thinking about it, she figured Emily wouldn't ever come to her on her own like they discussed, so she went for it. She slowly inched her lips towards Emily's. When she didn't move or protest, she captured her lips. She let them linger for a moment before she pulled away. It was their first kiss, but it was Emily's first kiss ever. Emily kept her eyes closed out of fear and shock. Once she opened them, she realized there was nothing to fear as long as Samara was by her side. She felt a familiar feeling in between her legs, a feeling that only Spencer had made her feel. They smiled briefly before emily pulled her down for another kiss.

**DON'T JUDGE ME BUT...THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER WAS INSPIRED BY A DELICIOUS BLUEBERRY MUFFIN I WAS EATING LOL.**

**SNEEK PEEK: SAMARA AND EMILY WILL TOTALLY HAVE SEX, TWO CHAPTERS FROM NOW...**

**PLEASE REVIEW. I'D LIKE TO KNOW WHAT YOU GUYS THOUGHTS ON THE STORY ARE THUS FAR.**

**FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DO REVIEW...THANK YOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**


	11. REVIEWS

**SOOOOO I WILL UPDATE ON THURSDAY. **

ANYWHO I'D JUST LIKE TO TAKE A MOMENT TO TALK ABOUT SOME REVIEWS.

**Guest ****6/16/13 . chapter 10 **

I want to follow you on IG lol but I don't want to be tempted to comment things like, "When you gonna update the story?"

**LMAOOOO...IT'S QUITE ALRIGHT, YOU CAN SAY WHATEVER YOU LIKE TO ME ON IG...AND I DON'T REALLY TAKE TOO LONG TO UPDATE ANYHOW. I REALLY THINK I'M SPOLING YOU GUYS BC IF I DON'T UPDATE FOR ONLY ****THREE ****DAYS YOU GUYS ARE JUMPING ON ME.**

The Dark Knight's Princess 6/18/13 . chapter 11

Really love your story even more now! Can't wait to see where you're taking this next. I know you said be patient but I'm still going throw a Hanna withdrawal :((( lol but anyway, great writing!

**THANK YOU SO MUCH, I'M FLATTERED YOU LIKE MY WRITING : )...HANNA WILL BE AROUND VERY VERY SOON...YOU GUYS REALLY LOVE HANNA HUH, I GET ASKED ABOUT HER DAILY ALMOST.**

**KayrotheLunatic ****6/17/13 . chapter 11**

Ha, the author's notes always make me laugh. I'm excited for Emily and Samara. They didn't give Emily and Samara enough time in the show. This is a great story. Almost a story within a story because of the length. I don't mind lenth. That sounded dirty. I didn't mean it. Except, yeah, didn't mean it. Hawaiian... Yeah. That was a part. DIVERSION.

**SOOO I LAUGHED FOR ABOUT 5 MINUTES AFTER READING THIS ONE. AND I WON'T MAKE YOU GUYS WAIT TOO TOO LONG FOR THINGS TO UNFOLD ALTHOUGH THERE IS A LOT THAT HAS TO HAPPEN. JUST TO LET YOU KNOW I WILL MAKE THIS A TWO PART STORY...I'M GLAD I MAKE YOU LAUGH **

**Guest ****6/15/13 . chapter 8 **

I think we could use a little Emily self-love/exploration next chapter. ;) good job. Post more soon.

**I AGREE...I WASN'T GOING TO, BUT NOW I WILL WORK THAT IN, THANKS FOR THE SUGGESTION**

**Fender18 ****6/17/13 . chapter 11**

Spending Christmas in Hawaii sounds amazing! Spencer is so lucky.  
The scene with Emily and Spencer was too cute! Emily is so love struck, it's adorable. Now she's juggling a crush on Spencer with her feelings for Samara, I think it's a pretty real scenario. I can't wait to read more of Emily and Samara's blossoming friendship and possible relationship. I wonder if they'll actually start a relationship or just have sex and that'll be that? Either way I'm excited to find out. Update soon.

**THANK YOU...AND I'M SLIGHTLY IN LOVE WITH YOU...AS I'M SURE MOST OF YOUR READERS ARE. YOU'RE AWESOME! THAT IS ALL...**

**recklesslittleliar ****6/16/13 . chapter 10**

Ugh I hate you! you are trying to make me guess who this spencer ex-gf character is! obviously its someone from glee considering her co-star is Naya rivera.  
You make everything so complicated!  
update soon please :P

**LOL! ACTUALLY SPENCER'S EX IS STARRING IN A VAMPIRE MOVIE WITH NAYA RIVERA...SO NOT SOMEONE FROM GLEE. I WILL LET ALL OF YOU IN ON A SECRECT...I WILL REVEAL SPENCER'S EX IN CHAPTER 11. IT WILL BE EPIC!**

**OKAY THAT'S ENOUGH FOR NOW. SORRY TO THOSE WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS AND UPDATE BUT I JUST HAD TO SHARE SOME OF THOSE. THANK YOU ALL FOR YOUR KIND WORDS. AS I SAID I WILL UPDATE ON THURSDAY. HAVEN'T GIVEN YOU MUTIPLE CHAPTERS IN ONE DAY IN A WHILE SO IF YOU'RE GOOD I JUST MIGHT.**

**SNEEK PEEK: SPENCER AND MEILANI WILL BE EXPLORING SOME NEW TERRITORY IN THEIR UNION...SAMARA AND EMILY SHARE THEIR FIRST TIME...THEN FINIALLY WE WILL LEARN THE IDENTITY OF SPENCER'S FAMOUS EX...WHO DO YOU THINK? COULD BE A REAL ACTRESS, COULD BE A CHARACTER FROM ANOTHER SHOW...COULD BE ANYONE.**

**ANY SUGGESTIONS, THOUGHT, COMMENTS, OR CONCERNS ARE ALWAYS WELCOMED.**

**THANKYOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**


	12. Chapter 10

**LET ME START OFF BY SAYING THIS CHAPTER IS DARN NEAR 8000 WORDS. I WAS GOING TO SPLIT THEM UP BUT THEN YOU GUYS WOULD HAVE TO WAIT LONGER FOR THE "BIG REVEAL" SO...IT'S REALLY REALLY LONG. I WAS GOING TO DO MORE WITH THE HAWAII SCENE BUT THE CHAPTER WAS JUST TOO LONG. SO I WILL HAVE SPENCER TELL ARIA ALL ABOUT IT IN CHAPTER 11.**

**ALSO THERE IS A REALLY LONG, REALLY SEXY SEX SCENE (MY FIRST ONE THIS STORY) TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK. IF YOU ARE NOT A FAN OF SMUT, SKIP TO "A COUPLE HOURS LATER" (YOU'VE BEEN WARNED)**

**ON WITH THE STORY...**

Spencer was excited, yet nervous to meet her girlfriend's family. Since she asked her to come Hawaii with her, all she's been able to think about is making a good impression. Meilani talked about her family all the time, and talk to them as much as possible. She knew how important they were to her. Her family was a complete contrast, they rarely saw each other and spoke to each other even less. She worried how she would fare in a family oriented environment, not having much experience in the area.

Aria happily danced and sung while she helped Spencer pack for her week in Hawaii. She watched as Aria picked up a piece of red lingerie from her drawer. She held it to her body and gave Spencer a wink. She inched towards her open suitcase on the bed to put it in.

"Munchkin, we're going to be at her moms house with practically her whole family there, when would I be able to wear that for her?" She walked over to the other side of the bed to remove the nighty. She placed it back in her draw and turned around to see a disappointed Aria.

"Y'all still haven't fucked yet so I thought I'd help you out with that. I've gotten you so much pussy, it's like second nature to me." Spencer tried to say something but Aria just talked over her. "Plus I'm dying over here without any sexy details. So you have to have fuck so I can hear all about it."

"You finished?" Aria nodded as she plopped down on the edge of the bed. "She wants to take it slow."

"Slow?! She has redefined taking it slow. A week, okay, two weeks? Maybe. But three months?! You have to have some serious lady blue balls."

"She wants to make sure I stick." Spencer said, defending her girlfriend.

"Stick? What should should want to 'stick' is your tight little..."

"Stop being gross Aria."

"I'm gross...duh, can't really help it."

"I know you have no idea what's it's like to take it slow with someone, but she just wants to be sure."'

"Sure of what? She's sure enough to take you home to meet the fam. Maybe this is a test. If you pass maybe you get some booty." Spencer thought about her words. She might be right, perhaps this was the last hoop she had to jump through to finally get as close to Meilani as she wanted. She wanted Meilani, in the worst kind of way, but when she tried to be intimate with her, she was told to pump the breaks.

"Mel has rushed into bed in the past and doesn't want to make the same mistake with me. When I tried to be with her she told me she wanted to wait to develop a more meaningful connection. A spiritual, mental, emotional, and intellectual connection. She believes those are far more important because any two people can connect physically. But any two people can't have the aforementioned connections." Explained Spencer repeating her girlfriend's words verbatim. "And I agreed with her. Sex complicates things and gets in the way. Especially if you want to have more than sex with that person. Having sex too fast can lead to some poor decision making, not excluding staying with someone bad because the sex is good."

Aria knew that was a jab at her for staying with a verbally abusive boyfriend way past the expiration date. She had a point.

"Okay, I'll take that...I suppose. But you took a month to become official and now who knows how many more months until you get to make love." She was taken aback by her choice of words. Normally she'd say "fuck" or "get some cheeks" or something else completely unromantic and vulgar. "What is she waiting for? Have you not told each other you love the other?"

"If we had I would have told you."

"Now this makes sense, she's waiting on the magic words." Aria was beaming upon her realization.

"Maybe, but I can't say them first."

"Why?"

"I don't...I'm not sure, but she has to say it first. Maybe I'm just waiting to see if she sticks too."

"Spency, you are smart, beautiful, sweet, and just simply wonderful." She got up off the bed and walked over to Spencer who was leaning on her dresser. She put her arms around her neck as she's done a million times before. "If she doesn't stick around, she's an idiot." She pecked her lips and hugged her tight.

"Do you know how much I love you?"

"Who wouldn't I'm incredible." Aria said after she pulled back to look at Spencer's face.

Spencer laughed. "You sure know how to ruin a moment."

"I love you the mostest Spence." They embraced for a while, like they normally did. Aria pulled away first. "Can I ask you something?"

"Anything at all munchkin."

"If you're not leaving til monday, why are we packing on a saturday."

"I like to be prepared Aria, is that a crime?"

"Fuck being prepared, let's get drunk." She skipped out of the bedroom humming a tune, in search for alcohol.

X

**The next evening**

Meilani and Spencer sat in an empty Stone Cold Creamery, eating sundaes. Whenever they went to a movie, Meilani insisted on getting some frozen treat afterwards. At this point, it's become a ritual.

"You're the only person in the world who loves ice cream this much in the winter."

"I highly doubt that nani, ice cream is amazing." Meilani responded with seriousness. She stopped eating her sundae, and stared at her girlfriend.

"What?" She often stared but Spencer always felt the need to ask what she was looking at. Meilani would respond with a "nothing" or "I can't believe how beautiful you are." But today was different.

"Do you love me?" Spencer dropped her spoon and it crashed to the floor below them. Her eyes wide, her mouth open, she was not expecting that. "Because I love you, and if you don't love me back, well...then I'm not working hard enough. I'm so in love with you Spencer." Her name. She never said her name. Only beautiful or its Hawaiian equivalent. She only said her name when she was being serious or was saying something important and needed to get her message across. The message was loud and clear, she was a woman in love. Spencer had known she loved Meilani for what seemed like a lifetime, just too afraid to say it. Didn't know how to say it, didn't want her feelings to be unreturned. However, here they were, and she heard the declaration she'd been yearning for.

"Of course I love you Mel, don't I act like it?" She tried to play it just as cool as her girlfriend, but inside she was doing backflips.

"Are you...are you in love with me?" That's what this was about, fear. Fear that love wasn't enough, fear that her feelings would be unreturned also. Both women in the same boat, afraid to fall overboard and drown.

"I'm in love with you Meilani. Yes.

Meilani smiled a sweet, soft smile, stood up to cross over to Spencer, and like she always did, gave her a slow, passionate kiss.

"So you have all your bags right?"

"Of course Mel, you asked me that before we left my house." Meilani suggested that Spencer spend the night at her house so they could wake up a little later than normal for their ten hour flight. Spencer had stayed the night in her bed plenty, and Meilani sleep in Spencer's arms in her bed as well. But nothing had ever happen, both respecting each other's bodies even though they wanted to be as improper as possible. They waited. They cuddled. They kissed. But no sex. Tonight, however, might be different Spencer thought. Now that they both know they love each other.

"Well then we should get going beautiful."

X

"You find everything alright?"

"I know my way around your house Mel, even though it's pretty easy to get loss in." Spencer finished towel drying her hair and laid on Meilani who was on her chaise in her bedroom. Her home was massive, far too big for one, too big for eight. It was a 17000 square foot home on six acres of land. There were nine bedrooms, twelve and a half baths, a billiards room, a finished basement, a wine cellar, a fully equipped gym and a pool. Her master bedroom was 2500 square feet alone. When Spencer commented on the inordinate amount of space for a single woman, Meilani just shrugged.

"Well good, how was your shower?"

"Relaxing, yours?"

"I was lonely. Do you have any clothes on under that?" Spencer shook her head. She purposely came back into the bedroom with nothing covering her except her robe. "Good, less time wasted. I love you Spencer." She kissed Spencer softly and put her hand inside her robe at the top of her shoulders.

"I love you too Meilani. Are you sure you're ready?" Even though she felt as though she might explode soon if Meilani didn't touch her, she wanted to make sure.

"I'm sure beautiful. I want to make love to you. Are you...do you..." Meilani's attempt at her question was cut off by Spencer's lips. She kissed her eagerly and undid the tie to her robe.

"Whoa, slow down beautiful, I wanna take my time. There's time for us to get wild and crazy and we will, just not right now. It's our first time, I want it to be special."

Although she wanted to savagely attack her girlfriend, she took a deep breath and slowed herself. "Okay baby. Round one we do it your way, round two we do it my way."

"What about round three?"

"God I love you Mel."

"Good, come on."

Spencer got up and Meilani lead her to her bed. They stood on the side of it holding each other's hands, just like outside the Grille before the rooftop. Meilani leaned in to touch Spencer's lips with her own, just like every other kiss, slowly. Spencer's already undone robe fell open exposing most of her naked form. Meilani reached her hands underneath and slid the robe off her shoulders, then her arms, then it was gone. Nothing was covering her and Spencer couldn't have been more unashamed. She learned to love her long thin frame long ago, and by the look in her girlfriend's eyes, she wasn't the only one.

"Koʻu nani kama. Ko aloha makamae e ipo. Aloha au ia 'oe." (My beautiful baby. Sweetheart, you are so precious. I love you.)

"I love you too Mel, I love you so much." Spencer closed the space between them kissing her firmly, yet smoothly, still unhurried. "You're the beautiful one."

"How about this, we make a really good looking pair."

"These are facts." Spencer giggled as they pressed their lips together once more. Meilani's tank top was off in a second and on the floor behind them. Spencer had to inwardly remind herself that the woman before her needed to take it slow. She took a little more time on her shorts, lowering herself as she slid them down. Meilani stepped out of them. Now they were both on an even playing field. Both bare, both exposed, both vulnerable. About to make love to the other for the first time. Meilani's lips moved to Spencer's, their kiss making her insufferably wet. Then her lips moved to her neck. Spencer tilted her head back, her girlfriend's kisses furthering her arousal. Her shampoo invaded her nostrils. Her hair always smelled like that, a hint of citrus. It was a smell that intoxicated Spencer, and this moment was no different.

Spencer's hands slowly made their way down Meilani's back, resting on her ass. She gave it a squeeze. After a trail of kisses were left along her entire neck, Meilani looked her in the eye. Momentarily Spencer was completely lost in her chocolate brown eyes, so deep, so dark, yet so welcoming and kind. They kissed again, moaning this time. She didn't know how much more she could take, but she would take it for Meilani. Anything for Meilani. Hands moved to breast, cupping them before lips took their place. Licking, sucking, biting. Weak knees, dripping wet center. Spencer was lost in Meilani's world, savoring each passing moment. Now it was her turn. She pulled Meilani's head by her hair, gently directing her upwards. Their eyes locked once again, silently communicating their affection. Spencer put her mouth to Meilani's breast, while her hand massaged the other. Glorious. Her breast were glorious. She always wondered what her D cup breast looked like uncovered. She no longer had to wonder. They were glorious. Large, round, perky, soft, perfect. Spencer had much less to offer in that department, which is probably which she's always been drawn to women with large breast. But no more. The only woman she was drawn to was in front of her, moaning at the pleasure she was receiving. Spencer paid a long visit to each of her girlfriend's ample breasts.

She heard a curse word, then she heard her name. Both rarely left her lips, but Spencer liked hearing her name in this context, she liked the profanity too. Moans, lip biting, gasping for air, more obscenities, hands buried in auburn hair. Meilani knew what Spencer had already discovered: this was worth the wait. Spencer finally, reluctantly, released her breasts. They paused. They were still standing. Time to get in the bed. They didn't need to talk, their eyes told them everything. Spencer made sure she was on top, she wanted to taste her sooner rather than later. First, she had to feel her. They kissed another passionate, agonizingly slow kiss. Spencer moved her body so that she was on the beautiful Hawaiian's side. Her hand made the journey from her neck, to her breast, onto her toned stomach, to the top of her womanhood. Her fingers did a dance the rest of the way until they reached a drenched center. Heaven. This had to be heaven. She wasted no time slipping between her folds to caress her. In a slow motion, she moved in circles. It was slippery, but she maneuvered just fine.

The noises coming from her girlfriend sent her diving head first over the edge. She had never reached that height just by pleasuring someone. Then again, she never had Meilani before. Her hand stopped moving so she could collect herself. A few more beats and she was ready to continue. Two fingers played with a wet center. Then entered. Meilani spread her legs wider. They kissed. Her hips moved according to Spencer's thrusts. Heaven. They were both in heaven, or something like it. She heard her name again and she knew the place she was currently taking her girlfriend would be the only place she'd hear it. Again, her name. The excessive amount of moisture collecting on her fingers was taking her to a place she's never been. She was experiencing feelings she never felt, not with anyone. Not even "HER". No one had ever gotten _that_ wet. This was new. This was heaven. She couldn't wait another moment. She removed her fingers and placed her mouth where they had just been. Meilani's body jerked, hips lifting off the bed to meet Spencer's mouth. Her mouth. Meilani wondered for months what those perfect lips felt like on her. Every time she licked her lips, every time they kissed. She wondered no more. Her mouth was as skilled as she predicted.

Spencer circled her with her tongue, adjusting speeds along the way. Making sure not one inch went untouched by her tongue. She often fantasized about the flavors she'd encounter below Meilani's waist. This was better. So sweet. No one had ever tasted that sweet, then again, no one was Meilani. What was in her mouth was perfection dripping down her throat. She couldn't lick or swallow fast enough. She would have a appetite for this, for Meilani, forever. She couldn't imagine having anyone else in her mouth, not after her sweet, delicious Meilani. She had to let her know. She pulled her mouth away. She stared at the massive amount of fluid that had stained the bed.

"Mel, do you know how good you taste?" She crawled up her heavily breathing, sweaty girlfriend to connect their lips, they parted. Their eyes talking. _I adore you._ "That's the best thing I've ever tasted."

"Is that so?"

"Yes it is."

"What are you waiting for?" Meilani put her hand on the top of Spencer's head, effectively putting her back to work.

Long strokes of the tongue, some screaming, more profanity. Heaven. Spencer placed both hands on either side of Meilani and parted her lips with her fingers for better access. Meilani had achieved three orgasms, each one stronger than the last, all due to Spencer's mouth. But she didn't stop, even when her head was being pushed away. She latched on tightly wishing she never had to stop. She was drunk off Meilani. Her touch, her scent, her taste. Now Meilani was on all fours, Spencer's brillant mouth taking her in from behind. Another orgasm. That made four. She couldn't take anymore. She had to tap out. She crawled away but Spencer quickly got a hold of her. Spencer had to punish her for making her wait this long.

"Where do you think you're going?" Meilani was on her back, Spencer was holding her in place with one arm and placed the other between her legs. She entered Meilani, pumping in and out.

"Baby...please...please. I...I can't take anymore."

"Take it."

"No...I can't."

Spencer leaned close to her ear. "You're going to take it." And yet another orgasm. Meilani never imagined the sex demon Spencer would be. She thought her sweet Spencer would be delicate. Although her pace was never erratic, she was far from delicate. She wanted to make love and Spencer was doing just that, but with power, with force. With her fingers still inside, she took Meilani over the edge for a fifth maybe sixth time, they had both lost count. Spencer reached her second. She stopped moving inside her. They laid there regaining their composure. Spencer kissed her cheek and played in her hair. Their eyes met again, speaking the language only they could speak. _That was mind blowing, you wore me out._

"Just give me a minute here." Meilani requested.

"Take all the time you need. Time doesn't exist here."

"Oh really? Where's here?"

"Heaven." That sounded about right. Where else could they be. They were no longer in Meilani's bedroom, they weren't even still on earth. They were on another plain completely, lost in each other. Reveling in making love for the very first time.

Meilani managed to recuperate and Spencer smiled to herself, proud of having that effect on her. She moved between her legs. She sucked on her neck. Spencer moaned in her ear. She felt so good. Her skin on her skin, her lips on her neck, her curvy body lying on hers. Meilani kisses moved around her body. Spencer waited in delightful anguish as her girlfriend once again took her time. It was alright, she'd be patient. Every part of her body had been kissed, head to toe. It was time. Meilani copied Spencer's dance from earlier. Her fingers easing down to where Spencer wanted, needed them. The amount of wetness she encountered was unreal, but expected. She would have to change to sheets, maybe even flip the mattress.

"No one has ever made me this wet." It was the absolute truth. Spencer's voice was low, sexy.

"Me either nani, me either." She kissed her lips, she toyed with her center, gentle circles, fully aware of how sensitive she was.

Fingers entered. Mouth open, noises that made Meilani throb again, came from Spencer. Sheets gripped, moans increasing in volume, fingers pumping, toes curled. Heaven.

"Say it." Meilani requested.

"Say what baby?"

"That you love me. Say it."

"I love you. Meilani, I love you. Oh God, you feel so good." Spencer cried out. Followed by Meilani picking up her pace. She watched Spencer's face change. Her mouth wide open, eyes wide shut. Spencer told her she loved her in succession. Over and over and over. Meilani was on the verge of climaxing again hearing those words while inside her girlfriend. These feelings were unexplored for both women. Neither had ever waited, until they knew 100 percent they were in love, to act on it physically. And this was the result. Heaven. Meilani pulled her fingers from Spencer when she felt her contract. She placed them in her mouth. She tasted amazing. She was on her knees looking in Spencers eyes. Between those exquisitely long legs, one hand in her mouth, one hand on the side of Spencer. She watched with lust as she tasted her.

"I need your tongue." Request granted.

Her mouth wrapped around her and she sucked. She kissed it. She licked it. Fast. Slow. Spencer's legs wide, as wide as she could get them. Her tongue just as talented as her fingers. She grinded on her face, slightly rolling her hips with every lick. She used one hand to part her lips, she used the other to grab Spencer's. They held hands. They were in love. And for the first time, they were making love. Their fingers intertwined as Meilani devoured Spencer. They held on tight to one another, never wanting to let go. They both came to the realization, they would never let the other go. This was it. This was how love was supposed to be. Sweetness, tenderness, understanding, loving, lustful, amazing. Heaven. That's exactly what their union was and their lives were now forever altered because of the other. Hands still holding tight. Mouth still consuming and swallowing. Moans getting louder and louder. Orgasm. Tongue still licking relentlessly. It was time for Spencer's punishment.

Round one was just as Meilani wanted. Soft, affectionate, loving, passionate, romantic. Round two was just how Spencer wanted. Rough, unpredictable, raw. Lots of ass smacking, hair pulling, back scratching, there was some biting two. Round three was Spencer on top, their centers connected, hips grinding a wonderful rhythm. Eyes still talking. Mouths announcing love. Lips kissing, hips still riding. Orgasm. How many was that? They didn't know, they didn't care. Spencer collapsed on her girlfriend. She wanted to keep going, she didn't want to ever stop. It just wasn't physically possible. After her breathing evened out, she rolled off Meilani and cuddled into her side. Their arms were wrapped around the other and their legs tangled. Just like the first night they spent together, they watched the sunrise. The sun was peaking over the balcony just outside Meilani's bedroom. They held each other silently and watched it rise. Heaven. Where else?

"We have to get on a plane in..." Meilani craned her neck to look at the clock on her nightstand. 7:19. They made love for almost eight hours. Breaks in between, but no sleep, just love making, eight hours. Heaven. "two hours. We'll arrive in Hawaii around six."

"Want to take a shower with me?"

"Sure nani. I love you."

"Aloha au ia 'oe." Spencer was still learning the language, but she knew how to express herself. To declare her love, that was easy, she could do that in any language.

X

**A COUPLE HOURS LATER**

"We're flying private?" Spencer asked as their car pulled into a hanger. A crew of five was standing by a boeing 707. One of them jogged over to Meilani's S550 to retrieve their luggage. Spencer knew Meilani made top dollar at Comcast, but she couldn't wrap her head around her renting a large aircraft. Meilani just smiled and lead her girlfriend on the plane. The crew all formally greeted Ms. Akina, and Ms. Hastings. "You rented this? That's got to be a small fortune for a ten hour flight." Meilani didn't answer, she just lead Spencer through the plane. It looked like a house on the inside. There was a bar, a kitchen area, lounge chairs, couches, tables. They got to the back and Meilani opened a door. She pulled Spencer in and shut and locked the door behind them. It was a rather large bedroom with two recliners and a flat screen TV. The bed was more than enough room for the two of them.

"Take your clothes off." Meilani ordered with lust in her eyes.

"Mel, we just had a marathon last night, the only thing I want to do in that bed is sleep. Although I appreciate it, you didn't have to rent a plane."

"I didn't, this is one of my mom's." Meilani put her arms around Spencer and hugged her tight.

"One of?"

"Yeah." Meilani was nonchalant, but internally, she was getting a kick out of Spencer's reaction. "She has three, I can't for the life of me figure out why she needs three, but she does. This one is the largest, then there's the mid-size, then there's the seven seater."

"Oh. Do you mind me asking what your mother does?"

"Of course not. She's a...businesswoman. She owns a lot of commercial real estate on all of the islands and most of south america. A little in Europe too. Her family left her ten acres in Hawaii which she built a small B&B on. She ended up buying some surrounding land and turned the B&B into a hotel. Not long after that she purchased the remaining land and transformed it into her first resort. She expanded from there, now she has a little over 300 hotels, several dozen resort and spas, private villas all over the world and a few casinos. She also owns tons of land in Hawaii, a few islands too." Meilani pulled Spencer by her shirt to the bed. "We're actually staying on one of the islands she owns. It's her favorite one."

"Wait so when you say she owns islands, you mean like a private island?" Meilani was a billionaire, and Spencer would have never thought it.

"Yes nani, a private island. It's over a hundred acres. I don't know why she likes is so much though, there isn't a private beach like her one in Hilo, or her one in Belize. We'll have to go there sometime. Oh, and her hotel in Bora Bora is incredible. The entire hotel is built in the middle of water. It's so beautiful there."

Spencer was shocked that Meilani's family was so well off. She didn't act like she came from money, and she never mentioned her mother's business before this plane ride. "You never mentioned anything about..."

"I don't normally lead off with "Hi, I'm Mel and my mother is a gizillionare." So...plus I need to be careful who I fully let into my life, and what I tell them. You never know someone's motives."

"So you didn't decide to trust me or let me in 'fully' until now?" Spencer asked, agitation clear in her tone. She could care less about how much money her family had, she felt upset to know Meilani didn't trust her.

"It's not that beautiful, I just didn't know how to bring it up." She sighed. "I must be honest with you, trust does not come easy for me. It's a constant struggle. Now that we've made our feelings for one another known and we've made love, it's even harder, but I'm trying."

Spencer had no clue Meilani didn't trust her, or anyone for that matter. She knew she wouldn't do anything to betray her trust, so she let the subject go. She kissed her to try to convey how she felt about her, but she was exhausted from the sleepless night before, yawning into the kiss. Meilani chuckled slightly and brought Spencer further onto the bed. She was asleep in seconds. Spencer looked up at her girlfriend and marveled at her beauty, she kissed her chin then not soon after, drifted off.

X

After a fifteen minute ride on the highway from the hanger, Spencer, Meilani, and her driver turned onto a paved road. About three minutes in, Spencer's stomach turned up in knots. She couldn't have been more nervous to meet her girlfriend's family. Two minutes later, they were parked in front of a large burnt orange house. The driver placed the bags by the dor, Meilani tipped him, and he was on his way.

"Wow, this...wow." Spencer said gazing at the home.

"Yeah, it is pretty nice. She has much nicer ones trust me. Much. This one is her smallest home.

"Small?"

"Yeah, it's only 5000 square feet. And there's no beach, we have to drive to the beach." Meilani pouted

"You really grew up spoiled huh?" Spencer was poking fun at her life, she knew Meilani was far from spoiled. In fact it was still hard for her to come to terms with how wealthy she was, she didn't act spoiled the slightest.

"Something like that. You ready to meet my ohana? It looks like they're all here." Meilani said looking at her family's cars that were sprinkled in the driveway.

"Hold on. I have a question."

"What's that nani?"

"Why didn't you come back to Hawaii when you were done with school. If my ohana was this loving and close, I would have come back."

"My mother wanted me to, actually she wanted me to work for the family business, but I wanted to pave my own way. Sure I could have come work for her and live in my home, but I wouldn't have been happy. I wanted to make my own money. That's why I work so hard, I want to be able to afford whatever I need or want, without help. So one day, I could give my kids the life I had, and know it's because I worked for it, not because it was handed to me."

Spencer could not have been more turned on. She was sexy, beautiful, smart, sensitive, independent, loving, thoughtful, hardworking. Meilani was everything. She placed a quick but loving kiss on her girlfriend's lips. "I love the way your mind works."

"I love the way your everything works. I love you so much Spencer. I feel so privileged to have you in my life, I can't believe you're mine." They kissed again, this time they lingered and the embrace deepend.

"Well believe it. I love you too Mel." Spencer said after breaking the kiss, but they quickly resumed.

"Hey, that's gross!"

Meilani and Spencer turned to see where the voice was coming from. Meilani's face lit up and so did the young boy's. Spencer assumed it was her youngest and favorite brother. He was only fifteen but he was well over six feet tall with a scruffy beard. His locks were long and as dark as Meilani's. Spencer thought he looked exactly like her girlfriend as the two embraced. The resemblance was uncanny, he could have easily been her son. He picked his oldest and favorite sibling off the ground and squeezed her tight. He was speaking a little too fast in Hawaiian for Spencer to catch on, but she caught a few words and knew he was telling her how much he loved and missed her.

"And who do we have here?" The younger Akina asked.

"Kia, this is my lovely girlfriend Spencer, Spencer, this is my annoying little bro Hikialani."

"So nice to meet you." Spencer said with a wide smile, extending her hand. He smiled back and picked her up off the ground, squeezing her like he missed her just as much.

"I'm sorry." Hikialani said after putting Spencer back on the ground. "I'm just so excited to meet you. Mel has never brought anyone home before. Mom is already planning you guys wedding." Meilani swatted her brother with the back of her hand.

"Shut up!" Meilani said. Spencer's nerves shot through the roof. She knew Meilani had been in two serious relationships, now three, all with Americans. She would have never figured she was the first to meet her family. "Go tell everyone we're here so we can make a grand entrance." Hikialani happily ran off to do as his sister told. "Hope you're ready." Spencer tugged at Meilani's arm as she tried to turn around to pick up their bags.

"Wait..." The lump in her throat wouldn't go away. "I'm the first person you've ever brought home to meet you ohana?"

"We have a rule in this family. You can't bring someone home unless...unless they're the..." Meilani checked Spencer's eyes which were wide. "My mom doesn't want a parade of boyfriends and girlfriends around her family so, we can only bring home one, the one we believe is...special." She noticed the fear and confusion in Spencer's eyes. "Hey, hey, calm down, I'm not proposing or anything. You're only twenty two for God's sake. I just know in my heart that we won't be separated again. You hold the key to my heart Spencer, and I don't want to ever let you go."

Spencer lept into her girlfriend's arms and kissed her with as my love as she was feeling for her.

"You ready now?"

"Yes baby, let's go. I love you."

"I love you too Spencer." Her name, she only said her name when she was serious.

Inside the home was beautiful. There was a mahogany grand staircase that was wide and spiraled. There was a dramatic thirty foot cathedral ceiling in the main entrance, with rounded walls and floor to ceiling windows looking out to a forest and the ocean. The flooring was brazilian cherry wood. They continued to walk through the house, and she got a glimpse of the kitchen which was made completely of wood. When they got to the family room Spencer saw ten men and women who all looked exactly like Meilani, with the exception of one, She recognized him to be her father, who she saw in tons of pictures. He was standing with his wife, tall, maybe 6' 10". Her mother was unmistakable, Meilani looked like her replica, as did all her children, she was the first to speak as everyone got quiet and all eyes were on the couple. She slowly walked across the large room which held five couches. She placed her hand on her eldest face and looked at her lovingly. Meilani hadn't been home in six months.

"Let me look at you." She said in Hawaiian. "You're so beautiful my love. I've missed you dearly. They embraced. After they pulled apart, she turned to Spencer. "Well hello."

"So nice to meet you Mrs. Akina." Spencer's heart stopped when she pulled her in for a hug.

"Please call me Olina. Nice to finally meet you too. So," She started, looking at her daughter. "I see you've finally settled down?"

"Yes I have." Meilani took Spencer's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. Meilani introduced her two brothers, three sisters, dad, and her dad's parents to Spencer. There was Mr. and Mrs Akina, A'la'i who was Meilani's next sibling, she was thirty, Enakai she was twenty six, Makaio he was twenty one, Rosabela she was eighteen, and Hikialani, who gave her a second bear hug. Everyone was friendly and seemed happy Meilani had brought someone home. No one else had a mate with them, she figured none of them had met "the one" yet.

"Kia, take your sister's and Spencer's bags over to her house." Kono, Meilani's dad, instructed. Hikialani hopped up and hurried to gather their luggage. "Makaio, go help."

"Your house?" Spencer asked confused.

"Yeah, I had it built a few years ago so that when I came here I could have some privacy."

"How much privacy do you need on a island your family owns." Spencer teased.

"Actually nani, it's more like a private rainforest, there's no beach."

"You and this damn beach, stop being so bitter. Some of the most beautiful beaches in the world are in Maui."

Meilani leaned into Spencer's ear. "And I plan to make love to you on every one of them."

X

Once they were settled in the 3000 square foot, three bedroom home that was a mile away from the main house, they couldn't keep their hands off each other.

"We should...really...go to the bedroom." Spencer tried in between kisses.

"There's a perfectly good couch right here."

"What if someone walks in?"

"They won't." That was the end of the debate. Meilani pulled her tank above her head and shimmied out her shorts. Her bra and underwear were off just as quickly. Spencer eyed her curvy body for a moment before removing her clothing as well. They made love on the couch until dinner.

X

Spencer and Meilani walked hand and hand on their way to the main house. It was 83 degrees and sunny. The perfect day, with the perfect girl. Spencer heard running water.

"What's that?" She pointed in the direction of the sound.

"Let me show you." Meilani lead her to a high waterfall with a swimming pond at the bottom of it. Exotic flowers surrounded the rocks, and the water was a clear light blue. "It's one of many, but this is mine since it's so close to my house. There's one in the back of the main house, it's twice the size of this one, I believe this is only two miles long and wide."

"Why in the world would you complain about the beach when you have private waterfalls and ponds in your backyard?"

"Meilani shrugged. "I just really like the beach." Spencer laughed, and they walked towards the house.

Once she had her fill of food and conversation, mostly telling Meilani's family about herself, she wandered off to find the waterfall she was told about earlier. Her eyes widened at the gorgeous sight that was indeed bigger than the other. She was relieved that her family accepted her, and saw how happy the couple made each other. Thoughts of her early evening love making rushed to her mind as she took a seat to put her feet in the water. There was some twigs snapping behind her and she thought it might be an animal, but Meilani's sister appeared.

"Hey Enakai."

"Hey yourself, what ya up to."

"Just relaxing, I love large bodies of water, any kind of water really. I wouldn't mind having a waterfall in my backyard."

"Yeah, we're blessed." Enakai sat next to Spencer and dipped her feet in the water too. Spencer looked over at the younger Akina, she didn't look 26, she looked 16. Spencer briefly thought about what her children would look like if Meilani carried them. The men were handsome and the women were stunning. None of them looked their age, especially the matriarch of the family. Meilani's mom didn't look 30 much less like she had two children over 30, her age of 56 would shock anyone with eyes. They all had the same chocolate eyes and the same smile that made Spencer weak. All their hair dark and curly, they all looked identical. The women were short, and the men tall and strong. She certainly wouldn't mind a couple of her children carrying the Akina genes.

"You certainly are." They sat in silence for a moment.

"You're way prettier than any of her other girls." Spencer was thrown off by the comment. She thought none of her family had met anyone else. "Not that I've met any of them, I've only seen pictures." Spencer could breath again. "But you're definitely way prettier, beautiful really."

"Thank you." She blushed.

"Ever model? You look like a model. An American one."

"Nope. Never thought about it."

"So you always wanted to teach? Even though you could make a killing in the fashion industry? You have a face people pay a lot of money to replicate, like your cheek bones are perfect."

Spencer tried to ignore the compliments, not really knowing how to feel about them. "Well, money should never be the goal for anything you do."

"Why not?" Enakai wondered.

"In the famous words of Bob Marley, "Money can't buy life". And it can't, the most important things in life don't have a price tag on them."

"I suppose that's true. So you're not after money?"

"Who's money?"

"My sister's."

Although she was thoroughly offended, she didn't react. She understood her family being protective. "No Enakai. Actually, I had no clue your family was so well off until about thirteen hours ago. Meilani is such a hard worker I just assumed her drive came from going without. She works her fingers to the bone, she barely has time to breath. I grew up having money and everyone in my neighborhood did too. A lot of my classmates were snobs and elitists who didn't know the value of a dollar. It's so refreshing to know Mel grew up with ten times as much and is still humble and works so tirelessly."

"Are you in love with my sister?"

"Of course. Deeply."

"How could you know? You're so young. Hell, I got you by four years and I have no clue what love is."

"Age is a number, maturity is a mentality. I don't have to be a certain age to know anything about anything. You live and you learn. Besides, I've always felt older than what my birth certificate says. And trust me Enakai, I'm in love with Mel."

Enakai looked at Spencer for a long while before speaking again, she didn't really seem interested or convinced by her words. "Don't hurt her Spencer." She stood up and Spencer watched her walk away.

X

"I couldn't wait anymore to give you your Christmas gift so...here." Spencer handed Meilani a navy blue velvet jewelry box.

"Nani, Chrsitmas is tomorrow, you really can't wait another 24 hours?"

"No. Open it." Spencer was shoving the box in her face. "Come on take it. Pleeeeease?"

"Fine. But now I have to give you your gift." She took the box, sat it on the night stand and disappeared in her walk-in closet. "Here." She handed Spencer a square white box with a oversized red bow on it.

"You first." Spencer watched as Meilani opened the lid to the box. Her eye sparkled upon seeing the 4 carat "S" pendant on a 10 inch necklace. "Look on the back, it's engraved.

**So I'm always near your heart. -Nani**

"Do you like it?"

"Spencer, I love it. I love it, thank you." She grabbed Spencer for a tight embrace. "Help me put it on? I'm never taking it off again. Okay now open yours."

Spencer dropped to the floor and excitedly ripped open the box. She pulled out the tissue paper and what was waiting underneath immediately brought a tear to her eye. She was speechless, how did Meilani know. There lied a vinyl record of "The Washingtonians" by Duke Ellington. She looked up from her spot on the bedroom floor, tears streaming down her face.

"I was looking through your vinyl collection and saw you had everything Duke Ellington had ever done. At least that's what I thought so I researched all of his work." Meilani kneeled down so she was on the same level as Spencer. "I realized you didn't have this one, once I started looking for it, I found out why. There's only eleven of these in the world. I found one guy who was willing to talk to me. He said he wouldn't let it go for less than 20 thousand. I didn't even think about it because I knew the look on your face would be worth a million bucks. So you like it?"

Spencer sent Meilani crashing into the floor when she jumped on her her a roughly pressed her lips to her girlfriend's. She had been obsessed with vinyl records since she was 14 and had an enviable collection. Some of her records were worth well over 15 thousand dollars, but this record meant more to her than any single possession could. She looked high and low for it for over six years, but constantly came up empty. Perfect Christmas eve with the perfect girl. They never made it to the bed even though it was five feet away. Spencer spent the rest of the evening on the floor with Meilani, showing her just how grateful she was.

The remainder of the trip went by in a blur. Everyone was sweet and kind and welcoming, just like Meilani. Except for Enakai who seemed to neither like nor trust Spencer. She would make remarks that were meant for only Spencer, and it made her uncomfortable, but no one else picked up on it. They all made promises to come to Philadelphia to visit. Even though Hawaii is a part of the US, it felt like a world away, and Spencer wasn't quite ready to leave.

"How about I stay, and you go, I'll catch a commercial flight back. I don't have work for another nine days."

"No, you're coming with me."

"Why?" Spencer whined.

"Because Spencer, I want you in the same state that I'm in at all times if possible. So you're coming home with me." Spencer didn't dare argue with her girlfriend when she spoke her first name.


	13. Chapter 11

**PLEASE READ:**

**WOW...I AM TRULY SHOCKED AT THE LACK OF FEEDBACK OVER MY LAST CHAPTER. IT WAS OVER 7000 WORDS AND ONLY A FEW OF YOU HAD SOMETHING TO SAY? I DON'T NEED REVIEWS TO BOOST MY EGO, IT'S JUST THAT, YEAH I WRITE FOR MYSELF, BUT I ALSO WRITE FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO ENJOY IT. THE THING I REALLY LOVE ABOUT THIS SITE IS TO BE ABLE TO WRITE SOMETHING AND INTERACT WITH THE READERS. WHAT I DO NEED IS YOUR COMMENTS, QUESTIONS, SUGGESTIONS, CONCERNS, ETC. EVEN IF YOU HATE IT, TELL ME. I REALLY THOUGHT MY LAST CHAPTER WOULD START SOME GOOD DISCUSSIONS, I'M REALLY PROUD OF HOW IT TURNED OUT. I'M GRATEFUL FOR THE FOLLOWS AND THE FAVS, AND THOSE OF YOU WHO DO TALK TO ME. BUT AS A WRITER, MY INTEREST IN THE STORY IS BASED OFF OF YOURS.**

**IF THERE'S SOMETHING YOU'D LIKE TO SAY, GOOD OR BAD, PLEASE DON'T HESITATE. IT'S APPRECIATED**.

"How about I make us some hot chocolate, sound good?" Samara asked as she hung her keys on the custom key holder by her front door. It was large and wooden. It said "Cook", Samara's last name.

"Sounds great." After making out in the snow for ten minutes, they got up and walked the rest of the way to Samara's empty house hand and hand. Emily felt nervous. She didn't know what might happen next, she didn't know what she _wanted_ to happen next. Samara was so wonderful and had, in a short amount of time, become one of her best friends. She admired her for how bravely and unapologetically she lived her life. She loved her corny jokes and her boldness. She loved her smile. Good God, that smile. She'd be lying to herself, or anyone else that could possibly ask, if she denied her beauty. She was devastatingly enchanting and Emily couldn't miss her attraction to her if she tried. She just didn't know if she could do it, if she could give up her virginity for the sake of perfecting the craft. Sure she wanted to be skilled once it came time for her to be with the love of her life, but at what cost. What if she was so horrific, Samara laughed at her. What if she didn't like it? Even scarier, what if she did like it and wanted to keep doing it. But she could never use Samara like that, she meant too much to her. More importantly, what if it ruined their friendship? That wasn't something she was willing to risk. She was so immersed in her thoughts, she didn't see Samara come back in the room with two mugs. She handed one to Emily and sat next to her.

"Something on your mind? You know you can talk to me about anything." Emily knew just how true that was.

"Um...Sammy, I'm not sure if I can do this."

"Do what?"

"This, you know...it."

"Have I asked you to?"

"No."

"Do you think I would force myself on you?"

"Of course not."

"So then what are you worried about? I can't lie and say I don't want it. Cause I do, badly, but I would never do anything you didn't feel comfortable with. Even if we got started and you asked me to stop in the middle, I'd do it, because I...I just care about you so much Em. You mean a lot to me and I'd never hurt you." She put her free hand on Emily's knee. "You believe me don't you?"

"Yeah. I do. It makes me feel so much better to hear you say all that. I was freaking out for a bit."

"Why, because we kissed?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Did you like it?" Samara had been dying to ask, but waited for the right opportunity.

"I did. I liked it a lot. Is that okay?"

"Of course it is silly."

"But...you're one of my best friends."

"And I will still be tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that. After every kiss, every hug, every moment we share." The things she felt for Emily, she had never felt with anyone else. She meant every word.

"You don't think having sex could...you know, maybe ruin our friendship?"

"No. Not at all. Why do you think that could happen?"

"Because, it's not about us being together or anything, it's about sex. But you're not some stranger, you're my friend. I don't want to feel like I'm using you cause I'm not, I would never."

Samara sat her mug on the table. "I would never think you could be capable of using anyone for any reason. Much less someone you just called a friend. You're such a good person Em. I've never met anyone like you. You're so special, and kind. Listen, I told you I'd help you and I will. If you want me to. If not, we don't have to."

"Okay."

"You said you liked the kiss though, right."

She blushed. "Yes. That's what I said."

"So, you liked the way it felt, the way my lips felt on your lips?"

"Yes."

"You liked the way it made you feel?"

"Yes."

"Did it make you wet?"

Emily was startled by the question. She was even more shocked at how casually it was asked. "What?!"

"Calm down and answer the question."

"No, I'm not telling you that!"

"You tell me everything else." Reasoned Samara.

"No."

"No it didn't make you wet?"

"No, I'm not talking about that."

"So it did make you wet?"

"Sammy!"

"Listen Em, I know you're a shy person. That's fine. But there is no room to be shy in the bedroom. Do you want to kiss me again?"

"I...I don't know."

"Yes or no...gun to you head." Samara put two fingers on the side of Emily's head. She raised her eyebrow and smiled the smile that got her what she wanted most of the time.

"Um...yes."

Samara put her lips on Emily's for the third time that early afternoon. The subtle, sweet kiss turned into a heavy make out session. Emily was underneath Samara with her in between her legs, lying down on the couch. Their hands explored each other's body. Pulling away panting, Samara posed the same question she had earlier.

Emily wouldn't answer, she just looked in Samara's beautiful eyes. "Did I?" Still nothing. "If you don't answer me, I'll have to find out for myself."

"Oh yeah, and how are you going to do that?"

"I'll take your pants off, or maybe I could just stick my hand in them." Emily swallowed hard. "If you don't want me to, then stop me." Samara sat up a bit to unbutton Emily's jeans, when she didn't move to stop her, Samara unzipped them. She put her hand in Emily's underwear.

"I'm wet! I'm wet okay, very." She grabbed Samara's hand to stop it from going any further.

"And earlier, out in the snow?"

"I was wet Sammy okay. You made me wet, your kisses did at least."

"Are you ready for this? I'll stop if you want me to."

"No, no. Don't stop. I...let's go upstairs.

Samara got up from the couch and pulled Emily up with her. She walked towards the staircase with Emily in tow. She cautiously walked up the steps just in case Emily got cold feet. But she said nothing and followed. They walked into Samara's spacious bedroom and she closed the door. For a few nervous moments, they stared.

"You sure about this Em?"

"Yes...I am."

"Okay, so take off my clothes."

"What?" Emily asked confused.

"Take my clothes off. You can do it at whatever pace you like but when you're undressing a girl there are different speeds for different occasions." They stood a few inches apart at the foot of Samara's queen sized canopy bed. "If you're about to make love, you want to go slow, if you just really wanna fuck her, rip her clothes off with haste. But you always want to undress a girl first."

"Why?"

"It gives you the upper hand. Plus if you ever become like me and enjoy casual sex, then that means you'll have a lot of first times with different girls. If you're settled with one this lesson doesn't matter. But the first time you bone a girl, any girl, undress her first. That way you get to taste her first. You undress her and do the whole foreplay thing and you stick your hand between her legs. Bring you fingers to your mouth and taste. If you don't like the smell or the taste you can make up an excuse and go. Or you could just make that "ew" face, tell her she's a dirty bitch and leave."

"I think I'd be a little nicer than that." Emily said trying to hold back her laughter.

"I figured. So take my clothes off."

"All of them?"

"Yes." Emily was still hesitant. "Em, you're shy, I get that, but I told you, you can't be shy in the bedroom. This is the one place there is no room to be shy in." Samara lifted her shirt above her head, slid off her boots and stood in only her bra, jeans, and socks. "There, I've taken some of the pressure off, now you do the rest."

Emily' mouth was agape. She had never seen Samara like this, not even at any of their sleepovers. She always wondered what she looked like minus clothing but didn't dare approach the subject.

"Have you never seen a naked woman?" Emily shook her head. "Are you kidding right now? You've never watched porn?" She didn't respond, she couldn't take her eyes off Samara's perfect breasts hidden behind a pink bra. "Emily, everyone in the world has watched porn. How is it you've never seen a porno?" Samara laughed a little at Emily's innocence. "Okay, okay um...would you feel better if I undress myself? You could do it next time."

"N-next time?"

"Yeah, this is gonna take awhile for you to get good at it. Practice makes perfect." She undid her jeans and pulled them down, exposing her matching boy shorts. She took her bra off and her underwear soon followed. Emily wanted to be ashamed for staring, wanted to look away, , but she couldn't. Samara was beautiful from head to toe. Her body was perfect, and Emily felt a fire coursing through her that landed square between her legs. "There. Now you've seen a woman naked. Oh and we're going to have to do something about this porn thing, but we can tackle that later. Okay, now you."

Emily reluctantly heeled out of her boots. She took her time taking her jeans off, followed by her sweater.

"Wow Em, you're..." Samara swallowed hard. Her heart rate picked up and she couldn't wait to make Emily moan. "You're really sexy, you know that? Don't stop."

Emily stood in front of her blushing with her right hand across her body, holding onto her other arm. "You're...sexy too." She managed, causing Samara to flash her deadly smile. "You're like one of the most beautiful girls I've ever seen. I...I always wanted to tell you that." She could no longer hold Samara's gaze upon her confession. Samara took Emily's face into both her hands forcing the taller girl to look at her.

"Emily, you are the most beautiful girl in the world." She didn't mean to say it, but she couldn't help herself. She pulled Emily down for a kiss. She didn't want her to know that her feelings were more than platonic, but she had no control. Their tongues danced against each other and Emily tried to keep up with Samara's rhythm. In the last hour she had taught her how to kiss and properly use her tongue.

"Are you wet?" Emily surprised herself with the question she asked once the kiss was broke.

"Wanna feel?" She could only nod her head. Samara guided her hand in between her legs and Emily felt the excessive amount of moisture. Samara winced a little at the contact. She pulled her hand away and looked at her glistening fingers.

"Is that...normal? For it to be so...much?"

Samara couldn't suppress her laugh. "That's a _really _good thing Em. The wetter you've got a girl, the better."

"I made you that..." She tilted her head towards her fingers. Her eyes widened in was shock when Samara grabbed her hand and placed her fingers in her mouth tasting herself. She smirked at the expression on Emily's face.

"If a girl doesn't wanna taste herself, then you probably don't want to either. Plus she's probably not a freak, in which case you don't want anything to do with her." Emily simply nodded her understanding. "Why am I the only one naked? Go ahead." She motioned towards the remaining bra and underwear set that still covered Emily's body. She took a deep breath and removed them. Samara looked her up and down, then licked her lips. The look in her eyes was foreign to Emily, but she was sure she was looking at Samara the same way.

"Okay. Next lesson, hygiene. It's extremely important to take care of your lady parts. And by take care of I don't just mean keep it clean, I mean keep it well groomed as well. As you can clearly see, I'm bald. In my opinion, that's the only way a woman should be. Or at least keep it really low."

"Why?"

"Different women probably have different reasons but, honestly, it's just cleaner. Plus, there's no hair getting in the way whilst receiving cunnilingus."

"You can't just say oral sex?"

"Nope. Now come on lets get you shaved, I'll teach you."

"What?!" Emily exclaimed as Samara tried to pull her to the adjoining bathroom.

"Would you stop questioning my genius? Let's go."

Once in the shower Samara explained and demonstrated to Emily how to shave her privates. She told her to bring the soap to a foam like texture, then to lather herself with it. She warned her to be careful and not to nick herself. Emily still uncomfortable with going hairless asked Samara to do it for her. She complied. She carefully lathered, shaved, rinsed, and repeated until all the hair was gone. They both showered themselves and headed back into the bedroom. But not before Samara reminded her that hygiene was of the utmost importance. Emily laid on the bed and identified the look that had been in Samara's eyes since she lost all her clothes: lust.

"Did you masturbate like I told you to?"

"No." Admitted Emily.

"Well..." Samara started while looking at Emily's freshly shaven flesh.

"What? Right now? In front of you?"

"Yeah, I think it'll be good for you. Masturbation isn't just about getting off, it's a really good self discovery tool. With you being a lesbian, you must familiarize yourself with the anatomy of a female, and what do you know? You just happen to be one." Aside from her sarcastic remark, Emily though Samara sounded like a college professor. "Also, it will help ease some of that fear. So touch yourself and when it feels good, just know that's probably what a girl likes."

"There's no way I'm doing that in front of you."

"Em I just shaved your pussy, and you can't touch yourself in front of me? Emily listen, girls think it's sexy, I know I do. There shouldn't be anything you're afraid to do in the bedroom." Samara walked over to her desk and rolled over her chair. She moved it in front of the bed and sat. "Just close your eyes and pretend like I'm not here."

She didn't want to but Samara was doing her a favor, and she was the expert. So she did as she was told. After closing her eyes and swallowing her fear, Emily found the courage to touch herself with Samara watching. Although it was the last thing she wanted to do, she trusted her, so she did it. She couldn't help her wetness, she was just looking at a naked Samara. Her breast were beautifully round and perky. She thought of them in her mouth. Her body was thin, but not too thin. She was sexy. The image of a Samara sans clothes, danced around Emily's mind as she rubbed circles on herself. The pleasure she felt varied based on the area she touched. She found a comfortable and satisfactory rhythm right in the middle. Emily used just her index finger at first, but incorporated her middle one too. She circled herself faster and faster, moans escaping her lips. She knew Samara's eyes were on her and that turned her on even more. Samara had mentioned liking to watch, she hoped she was giving a good show.

Emily felt the bed shift. Samara must have wanted to get a closer look. She kept her eyes close. Suddenly she felt something warm and wet on her. Opening her eyes wasn't necessary for Emily to know Samara had placed her mouth on her nipple. She didn't stop rubbing herself, she didn't want to, it felt too good. Samara's tongue licking her only heightened her pleasure. She felt Samara inch up her chest to her neck, leaving kissed along the way. Samara grabbed the hand that was in between her legs and lifted it above her head. She took her other arm as well and pinned them to the bed while straddling her thighs. Emily finally opened her eyes and relished the vision of beauty on top of her. She closed them again as Samara kissed her roughly. When Samara pulled her lips away, Emily looked at her.

"You ready?" All Emily could do was nod.

X

Emily walked into her kitchen and found her mother and Samara laughing while preparing dinner together. Emily loved how well her mom and Samara got along. Her mind briefly thought of how disgusted she would be if she knew she was sharing laughs with the girl that was having sex with her daughter. She shook the negative thought off and observed her two favorite girls.

"Sammy, would you mind if I left you here with my mom for like an hour? Paige needs me." Emily asked, making her presence known.

"Of course not, your mom and I are cooking a really big dinner so we'll be awhile, right Mrs. Fields?"

"Right. Is Paige okay sweetie?"

"Yeah, yeah she's fine, she just needs to talk to her best friend is all, I won't be gone too long, have fun."

"We will." Samara and Pam said in unison as Emily rushed out the door.

She ran the five blocks to Paige's house, she couldn't wait any longer. Paige didn't need to talk, she did. Once settled on her favorite couch and sipping some apple juice, she finally got her chance to tell Paige what's been going on the last five days. Ever since she lost her virginity to Samara, she couldn't get enough. With her mom working so much, she and Samara we're left alone often. And when they weren't, they'd sneak over to Samara's. Paige listen intently as Emily described her first sexual encounter.

"It was...it was so sweet. She went really slow and talked me through the whole thing. I couldn't believe how attentive she was. She kissed me everywhere and her touch was so gentle. The way she talks about other girls and sex, I just figured she would be eager, and rough. But it was...perfect." Emily gushed.

"So what...did y'all do, like did you do stuff to her too?"

"I did. Like I said she talked me through it. After she had...um, gave me...after she..." Emily tried.

"Gave you head? You can say it Em." Paige said between giggles.

"Yeah after she gave me head..."

"How did that feel, what was that like?"

"Getting head?" Paige nodded. "It was amazing, it was incredible. I didn't know I could feel so good. My whole body tingled from head to toe. Her mouth is...outstanding. She sure knows what to do with it. The whole thing was out of this world. Especially when she, I don't know, she does this thing with her tongue. God her tongue...it's magnificent. Anyway, after she was done with that she asked me if I wanted to try."

"You weren't nervous?"

"I was scared out of my mind, I had no clue what I was doing, but she instructed me. She told me to just make out with it. Kiss it, suck it, lick it, change up my speed. At first I was holding back, then as I got into it and she started to moan and grab my head...I figured I was doing something right. So I just went for it."

"Did you like it? I mean, giving her head."

"I loved it Paige. She told me to put my fingers inside her while keeping her in my mouth. It was tricky at first, but I got the hang of that too. I ended up crawling up her body so I could kiss her. So I had my fingers inside her and she was clawing at my back, moaning my name in my ear while I kissed her neck. It was so amazing. Before I knew it, I made her...come. Mmmm...the noises she was making." Emily closed her eyes reminiscing about their first time. "It set my soul on fire Paige. It was crazy good."

"Was that the end of it?"

"No way. We did it for like...I don't know how long. She taught me different positions to give and receive head in, how to move inside of her, where to kiss, where to bite."

"Did she finger you?"

"No..." Emily said sadly. "I wasn't ready for that, I'm still not."

"Still?" Paige was shocked.

"We've been doing it everyday since Saturday. I really can't get enough, like there aren't enough hours in the day to have as much sex as I would like. She's just so good at it, it's so incredible."

"You told me you had an agreement for her to teach you."

"Yeah and she's still teaching me."

"But..."

"What?"

"You two are actually having sex with each other, constantly, it wasn't a one time thing."

"You're point?"

"What if she finds a girl she wants to be with?"

"That's not going to happen, she's not the relationship type, besides, I keep her plenty busy."

Paige looked at her friend and almost didn't recognize her. "Wow Em, having sex has really changed you."

Emily frowned. "In a bad way?"

"No not in a bad way. In a you're-way-more-confident type of way. So...you two are going to keep having casual sex? Even though you're friends?"

"Well...I don't know what we are."

"What do you mean?"

"We aren't having sex Paige, I mean yeah sometimes we do, but most of the time I...I feel like we're making love. Like she's making love to me because she loves me. I don't think this is just sex to her. She'll lay between my legs while having her hand on me, moving in heavenly circles, kissing my lips and my face. When she's like that, she'll look me deep in my eyes and sometimes I swear she's gonna say she loves me, but doesn't. But we've never talked about our feelings, ever."

"How do you feel about her?"

"Paige, I'm so...gosh, I simply adore her. I'm falling for her."

"What about Ms. Hastings?" Paige teased.

"I'll probably always want to jump her bones, but we both know that'll never happen." She laughed.

"Don't let Sammy get in your head Em, you said yourself, she's not the relationship type."

"But...I feel like we're together. The way she looks at me, the way she kisses me, the way she holds me at night. If I try to move she pulls me closer, like she never wants to let me go. And when we make love Paige...I'm telling you it's special. She tells me how special I am all the time. Sometimes she'll just hug me and kiss me without sex being the aim, she showers me with affection, she's amazing." Emily couldn't help but spill her guts to the only person she knew she could trust with this information.

"Emily?" Concern was apparent on Paige's face.

"Yes?"

"Please...seriously, please be careful."

X

After going at each other for the past two hours, Emily and Samara laid breathless on Emily's bed. Emily finally felt comfortable to let Samara go inside her. It was painful, but enjoyable, and Samara took her time. Samara wrapped her arms and leg around Emily as she normally did. The looked at each other basking in their after sex glow. She smiled at her and Emily smiled back. Samara's smile made Emily's heart flutter. She always smiled and it was always beautiful, but there was something different about her smile in intimate moments. Emily knew that only she saw that smile, and that made her heart sing. She had it bad for Samara, one of her best friends. But she knew they were more than that. She thought of her earlier conversation with Paige, and her smile faded.

"What's wrong Em? Did I not give you enough orgasms?"

Emily laughed, Samara was always so silly, and she loved it. "Oh no, you gave me too many orgasms."

"Is there such a thing?"

"I guess not, but I don't think there's anything left in there." They shared a laugh.

"So then what's wrong?"

"How, um...I want to know how...how you feel about me. About us and what we're doing."

"Us?"

"Yes. If you want to stop...we can."

"Do you want to stop?"

"Honestly? No."

"Neither do I."

"Okay...so how do you feel?"

Samara knew it was only a matter of time before she would be faced with this question. "Em, I...how do I feel about what specifically?"

"Me."

"You're the most amazing girl I've ever known. You're a great friend, and you're too sweet for words. Honestly I don't think there are words that could properly describe you. You are so Special Emily." She stroked Emily's cheek.

"Do you _have _feelings _for _me?" She took a deep breath, and waited for a response.

"More than friend feelings?"

"Yeah. More than friend feelings."

"Why do you want to know?" She knew Emily hated when she answered questions with questions, but she couldn't help herself.

"Because I do."

"That's not an answer."

"Neither was yours. So..."

"Do you have more than friend feelings for me?"

"I asked you first." Emily snapped.

"I asked you second, are we keeping score." Going back and forth, that was Samara's MO.

"Ugh...could you just answer the question please?"

"Yes."

"Good, so...do you?"

"I just told you, yes."

"You do?" Even though she suspected Samara was harboring feelings for her, she was still shocked to hear the truth. Happy, and shocked.

"Yes. Do you?"

"Yes. I do. I like you. A lot."

"Good. Emily, while we're on the subject, would you be opposed to, uh, maybe...being my girlfriend? I've never had one and I don't know how good I'll be at it, but I want you all to myself, and I wanna be yours."

"Oh my gosh, Sammy, are you serious, did you really just ask me that?" She nodded. "Of course I want that. I..."

Samara kissed her with all the love and passion she could, ending their conversation. Their tongues did a familiar dance and they moaned in one another's mouths. Emily's hands moved to Samara's hair, while Samara had a tight grip around Emily's neck, pulling her impossibly close. The kiss said everything they couldn't or wouldn't say. In that moment they both knew what that kiss meant. The end of their friendship, and the start of something new.

**I KNOW, I KNOW...YOU ALL WERE EXPECTING THE REVEAL** **RIGHT**?** BUT 2 THINGS HAPPENED...ONE: THERE WAS MORE PLOT TO BE TOLD...TWO: YOU GUYS STOPPED TALKING TO ME.**

**HOWEVER I'M NOT A EVIL PERSON, SO THE REVEAL WILL BE LATER ON TODAY...BUT ONLY IF YOU'RE GOOD**


	14. Chapter 12

**OKAY GUYS, FINALLY...I REALLY DON'T THINK YOU ARE READY FOR THIS.**

**WARNING: THIS CHAPTER MAY BE TOO AWESOME FOR YOU TOO HANDLE**

**LOL**

**HAPPY READING...**

**AND LET'S NOT FORGET TO REVIEW**

Spencer stepped off the Akina owned private aircraft to see Aria parked not far from Meilani's Mercedes. She was standing on top of her Honda accord with a sign that read: Welcome back Spency. She slid off the car to jog over to the steps of the plane. Spencer looked at her girlfriend.

"I might of called Aria from your phone and asked her to meet us here. I could tell how much it was killing you two to be a part." Spencer hugged Meilani before getting down the steps quickly. She had missed Aria, badly. This was the longest they'd ever been apart since they've known one another. Spencer barely made it off the last step before Aria tossed her sign to the ground and jumped in her arms. She wrapped her legs around her waist and placed multiple kisses all Spencer's face. Once she stopped kissing her, Aria buried her face in Spencer's neck.

"I've missed you so much Spence! You can't leave me for that long ever again. Got it?"

"Got it." Spencer began spinning the small burnette around making her giggle. Aria started her kissing attack again, just as Meilani got done placing Spencer's bags in Aria's trunk.

"Don't you ever take my Spency away from me that long again." She shot Meilani a stern look.

"I'll try my best."

"So I'm kidnapping her and you can't have her back for three days."

"You're the boss. I have a lot of work to catch up on anyway, emails, phone calls and such. So I better get going. Mind if I give my girlfriend a kiss goodbye?" Meilani asked. Spencer had yet to put her best friend back on the ground.

"Go ahead."

"Um...you wanna get down so I can kiss her properly."

"No. You've had her for damn near a week, I'm never letting her go again, hell if we could drive like this, I would. So give her your kiss and be on your way." Aria wasn't kidding.

Spencer laughed at her loving friend, then looked at Meilani, who looked confused. "Just do what she says, it's in the best interest of everyone." Meilani leaned in and placed a quick kiss on Spencer. "I love you."

"I love you too beautiful." Meilani watched as Spencer carried Aria over to her car. Her arms were still tight and her legs even tighter. Meilani tried to shrug off her wandering thoughts and turned on her ignition.

Even though every chance she got to be alone she would facetime Aria, she still missed her like crazy. She held her close as her tiny best friend kissed her face over and over again. Aria placed a kiss on her lips, she lingered there a little longer than normal. Spencer didn't mind, she knew Aria missed her just as much. This was the longest amount of time they'd spent apart since meeting at the playground fourteen years ago. Spencer heard Meilani's car drive away behind her as she neared Aria's Honda. Aria didn't relent with the kisses and Spencer couldn't stop smiling. When Spencer tried to put her down, she stopped kissing her, tightened her grip on her neck and clamped her legs in place around Spencer's waist. She couldn't let Spencer go, not just yet, she had to wait another 40 minutes to hug her again once they started driving. She hated being away from her, even for a second. Five days was brutal. After holding one another for a few long moments, Aria pulled her head back to look at her newly tanned friend.

"The sun was good to you huh?"

Spencer blushed. "Yeah, I'm feeling the tan."

"Tell me everything."

"Munchkin, I talked to you everyday, not much more to tell."

"Well tell me anyway."

"Could we maybe get in the car now?" Spencer snickered at Aria's pouting face. "Listen, when we get home we can get drunk and cuddle all night.

"Really?"

"Yes, really. But we have to get there first." Aria hopped off Spencer and skipped over to the driver's side.

X

"So why do you think she doesn't like you?" Spencer had just finished telling Aria, for a second time, about her constant uncomfortable encounters with Enakai.

"I have no clue." Spencer answered honestly. "She just doesn't trust me. I can tell, I don't know why, but she doesn't.

"Doesn't she know you have your own money?"

"Do you know what Olina Akina's net worth is?" Aria shook her head, keeping her eyes on the road. "Over three billion dollars. And that's net worth, that means she's got that money sitting in a bank. Their family has billions of dollars and they're careful about who they bring around. I told you about that family rule. Anyway I get being protective over your family, but...I don't know I just really wanted them to like me."

"I thought you said Enakai was the only one who was on your case."

"She was."

"So don't worry about it. How was Christmas?"

"It was amazing. We slept in the main house so we could all wake up together. Everyone exchanged presents and we listened to holiday tunes, it was sweet. There was this awkward moment between Olina and I though. Well not completely awkward, she just threw me for a loop."

"What happened?"

"She asked me to help her glaze the pig outside, she said she usually does is with one of her daughters, but since I was there, she wanted me to."

"Wait the really roast pigs?"

Spencer laughed. "They sure do, and it was delicious."

"Gross! So you go to get the pig ready, then what?"

_Olina silently prepped the pig, showing Spencer what she needed to do. After they were finished and placed a apple in the dead animal's mouth, they cleaned themselves up with the garden hose._

_"Have a seat with me Spencer." They took a seat on the lounge furniture, just by the pool. "So is there a wedding I should be getting ready for anytime soon?"_

_Spencer's heart was caught in her throat. She wasn't expecting such a question. "Not that I know of Ms. Olina."_

_"No?" The woman looked shocked._

_"Nope."_

_"That's odd."_

_"How's that?"_

_"You two aren't engaged?"_

_"No, we aren't." Spencer wasn't sure if this was a joke, if it was she didn't see the humor._

_"Well my children know not to bring someone home unless they are going to marry them."_

_Spencer's heart left her throat and slid down to her feet. She and Meilani had never discussed marriage. "Oh, well we haven't gotten around to the topic."_

_"Yet?"_

_"I'm...I..."_

_"I know you're much younger than my daughter, but she knows the rules. So I'm assuming eventually she will ask you to be her wife. Which I'm fine with, you're a very lovely young lady. You're beautiful, and kind, and I can tell you make my kaikamahine very happy. Which is more important than anything. It's just that I was expecting a ring on your finger and here you are, ring less." She looked at Spencer's left hand. "No pressure or anything, but there's another rule in this house, no children til marriage. And honestly I thought I'd be a kupuna by now. But alas, I'm grandchildless. No pressure though." She chuckled, then playfully nudged Spencer. "I'm going inside, coming?"_

_"I'm just gonna watch the sun set." She was, but she also wanted time to think._

"Wow. So Mel clearly knows the rules of her mother's household?"

"Without a doubt in my mind."

"So you think she'll propose soon? Are you even ready for that? Did you tell her about the talk with her mom?" Aria often fired off questions without waiting for answers, Spencer was more than used to it.

"I have no idea. Maybe. And no." Spencer said answering all of her inquiries.

"Why not?"

"I was already a little freaked out, and it was the middle of Christmas day, she was playing games with her brothers and sisters, and a few of her cousins. I didn't want to ruin her trip."

"If she asked, whether it be today or six months from now, would you say yes?"

"In a heartbeat."

X

Spencer sat on her couch with her computer in her lap. Her hair was pulled into a messy ponytail and she donned a white tank and grey leggings. Her legs were crossed and she was focused on her screen. Aria had just left to go meet up with Ezra. They spent the last 70 hours drinking, talking and cuddling. She barely let Spencer talk to Meilani, who would be at her door any minute. She sipped her coffee which was desperately needed after almost three days of not enough sleep, and too much booze. The knock on her door broke her concentration.

"Hey you." The faint hint of a accent accompanied by a beguiling smile made Spencer go weak upon opening her door.

"Hey baby." They wrapped their arms around each other. "I'm sorry Aria's kept me hostage. She can get like that sometimes."

"It's okay, I had a ton of work to do." Meilani kissed Spencer and backed her into her apartment, closing the door with her foot. The exchanged became heated in a matter of seconds. "God I missed you." She said against Spencer's lips.

"I missed you more." Their embrace was cut short by Spencer's phone ringing, it was Aria's ringtone. Meilani took a seat while Spencer tried to rush her best friend off the phone. She hung up and sat on Meilani's lap, giving her kisses on her cheek and neck.

"Can I ask you something beautiful?"

"You can ask me anything." Spencer replied against Meilani's neck.

"Have you and Aria ever had sex?" Meilani was startled by how quickly Spencer sat straight up and climbed off of her. The look on her face was a mixture of disbelief and disgust. Her eyebrows were furrowed and her face scrunched up.

"No! That's disgusting! That would literally be like having sex with Melissa. Why would you ask me some crazy shit like that?" Spencer didn't like to use profanity, only when she was upset or angry.

"The way she was with you when she saw you at the hanger. She was all over you." Meilani said calmly.

Spencer stood over Meilani. "So?! That's just how Aria is. She's loving and affectionate. She missed me! She showers me with kisses if she doesn't see me for two days, how do you think she felt after five."

"Calm down nani, I was just asking a question."

"A disrespectful question!" Spencer was furious that Meilani could even think to ask such a thing.

"Don't be so defensive, I was just..."

"Damn right I'm defensive of my relationship with her! I would take a bullet for her, I'd put a bullet in someone for her. She owns a piece of my heart no one can ever touch! I can't believe you asked me that. And after three days."

"Well I haven't seen you remember." Meilani rose from her seat, she was a few inches shorter than spencer but she stood firm.

"You've been holding on to this for three days and you just now wanna bring it up? How could you be pissed about my bestfriend and me?"

"I wasn't pissed, but I'm getting there. I saw her kiss you!"

"Again, SO?! What's your point? We kiss all the time." Spencer reasoned.

"On the lips? She kissed you on the lips, and it didn't look friendly!" Meilani yelled.

"I'd be worried if she gave me some pedestrian kiss, our love for each other is special. Don't get me wrong my family and I love each other but aria...she's special. We've always kissed on the lips, even when we were kids."

"So you never fucked her?" Meilani didn't use curse words too much either, but the debate had her blood boiling.

"I already told you no! That's gross!"

"Never thought about it?"

"What the...get out!" Spencer had had enough of her ludicrous accusations.

"Seriously? You're kicking me out?" Her tone was back to normal.

"I don't even wanna look at you right now! Get the hell out!"

Meilani stood her ground. They stared each other down seeing who would budge first. She briefly thought about apologizing but turned around and left.

X

The next day was new year's eve and Spencer couldn't stop thinking about her fight with Meilani. They hadn't talk since, each of them waiting for the other to make the first move. She still couldn't believe Meilani had the audacity to ask her such a ridiculous question, but the more she thought about it, the more she realized how her relationship with Aria could possibly look from the outside looking in. Even still, she couldn't stomach that Meilani would think that. The longer she was left alone with her thoughts the more agitated she became. She needed to talk. She grabbed her keys and checked the clock. 11:23am. She knew Aria would probably be asleep, but she needed her best friend. She ran up the two flights of stairs, taking two at a time. She walked down the long hallway and stopped in front of her door. There was no sound. She unlocked the door to the spacious two bedroom dwelling to find her best friend and Ezra Fitz wrapped up in one another, naked, on the couch. Her cheeks were flushed and she quietly snickered. She walked over to Aria's elaborate sound system and turned it on. Some Katy Perry song came on and she turned the volume up to the max. Ezra and Aria jolted awake at the loud and sudden noise. Spencer laughed heartily once Ezra saw her on the other side of the living room and quickly grabbed a throw pillow to cover himself. She turned the system off while unsuccessfully trying not to continue laughing.

Aria rubbed the sleep out of her eyes and pushed Ezra off her. She got up as he watched her naked form walk over to her best friend. His eyes bulged when he saw her wrap her arms around Spencer's neck and pulled her down, giving her a peck on the lips.

"Ew munchkin, you have morning breath."

"So, you still love me." She said sleepily, with her arms still around her neck. Spencer pulled her close.

Spencer looked over at Ezra who was like a deer caught in the headlights. At that moment she knew, for a fact, it would be easy to think they might have had, or was still having, a sexual relationship.

"I'm sorry Fitz, didn't mean to wake you guys, or disturb your naked party, but I need to talk to my bestie, if that's okay." Spencer and Ezra watched Aria saunter towards the bathroom. The sink faucet turned on.

"Um, I...um, yeah I, uh...it's okay."

"Here ya go, I'll cover my eyes." Spencer said as she tossed him his pants and covered her eyes.

"Aw what's the big deal, you know what a penis looks like." Aria asked coming back into the living room, her red satin robe on.

"I know but he seemed uncomfortable." Spencer teased. They both looked at Ezra who had put his jeans on and sat back down on the couch.

"I'm fine..." He said unconvincingly. "Why don't I go in the bedroom and let you ladies talk?"

"Actually, you could be useful." Spencer said, taking a seat on Aria's laz-e-boy.

"Okay, now I'm intrigued. What's up Spency?" Aria asked.

"Fitz, how did you feel, or should I ask what did you think when you saw Aria hug me without any clothes on?"

"Um, I, uh..."

"It's not a trick question, it's kinda why I came over here, so be honest, was that weird for you?" Spencer and Aria looked at Ezra waiting for his response.

"Uh, well...yeah kinda."

"Why?"

"Because, she wasn't wearing clothes, and you just...held each other tight. It was sexy don't get me wrong but odd. Aren't you a lesbian?"

"Yes, what does that have to do with anything?"

"Well, one might think..."

"That we had something going on?"

"Looks that way." He smoothed out his long curly mane.

"Hmm..." Was all Spencer could offer.

"What's this about Spencer?" Aria asked after turning her attention back to her best friend.

"We look and act like we fucked, that's what it's about."

Aria gasped and stared at her in utter shock, Spencer never cursed, she knew something was terribly wrong. "Baby, what are you talking about?"

"That, how we talk to each other, how we show each other affection, it looks suspect. But I love you so much and we've always been this way. I don't even know how to begin to even think about changing it." Spencer said with obvious sadness in her voice.

"Spencer, what's going on, I'm confused." Aria looked over at Ezra who scooted a bit closer to her, putting his arm around her.

"Meilani and I got into a huge screaming match. It was our first fight." She paused, Aria and Ezra waited patiently for her to resume. "It was over you." She looked in Aria's eyes which grew wide.

"Me?" She asked with disbelief. "What did I do."

"At the hanger, before she pulled off, she saw you kiss me. I knew you gave me a longer one because you missed me, but she wasn't too pleased to see your lips on mine." She looked at Ezra, who looked confused. "We always kiss on the lips, but it's not sexual. It's never been. Aria was the first person I ever kissed, when we were nine." She saw Aria's face light up at the memory. "She asked me could she practice on me, and not knowing any better I said sure. After that we always kissed on the lips. It's not even really a kiss, it's just a peck. But what Meilani saw was not a peck, she kissed me and I kissed her back. There is nothing and has never been anything between us except friendship, we're just ridiculously close." she explained.

"I see that. Did you tell your girlfriend this?" Ezra wondered.

"More or less." She reclined the chair and put her feet up. "Actually I started yelling at her the second the question came out her mouth."

"What question." Asked Aria.

"If you and I ever had sex." They were all quiet for a moment. "What really set me off was when I told her no, _twice_, and she asked if I thought about it."

"You two never thought about it? I'm just asking, don't kill me." Ezra said when Spencer shot him a nasty look. "You know just to scratch that itch. All girls think about what it would be like to have sex with another girl, gay or straight." Spencer realized Aria hadn't told him about the Dominican.

"I've had sex with a woman, and it wasn't Spencer." His eyes bulged for a third time. "She's like my sister, I would never. The thought has never crossed my mind."

"That's what I said! I tried to explain, but she just hurled accusations at me and I kicked her out."

"Spence, you kicked her out?"

"Yeah."

"Have you tried talking to her since, wait when was this?"

"Last night, a little while after you left to meet Ezra."

"I'm so sorry Spency." Aria got up and laid on Spencer. She soothingly rubbed her hand up and down her arm. Spencer looked at Ezra. "Does this make you uncomfortable, does this look bad?"

"If I was a stranger, and didn't know the nature of y'all relationship, I would think y'all were together."

Aria looked up at Spencer. "Spency, I don't know how to be any other way. I'm sorry."

"Aw, munchkin, I don't remember the last time I saw you sad. Could you stop, you're going to make me cry." It was true, Spencer rarely saw Aria in a bad or upset mood. She was the happiest person she had ever known.

"I can't help it, I feel bad."

"Don't feel bad baby." Ezra chimed in. "You love your best friend, there's nothing wrong with that."

"He's right Aria." They held each other tight. She looked at Ezra who had love in his eyes, then she glanced at Aria. As much as they shared with each other, Aria never talked about Ezra. Normally Spencer would shrug it off because she never got serious with anyone, but something was different. "Um, baby? Did her just call you baby?"

"We're together okay?" She got up and walked back over to the couch. She plopped down next to her boyfriend. "Get off my back with all your questions!"

Spencer laughed. "I asked one question, relax. So...when did this happen?"

"You didn't tell her about us?"

"It's none of her business Ezra!" Aria was getting frustrated. She didn't like having feelings for anyone except her family, her friends, and most importantly, her Spencer. As much as she would have liked to deny it, she had fallen in love for the first time in her twenty two years of life. She just wasn't quite ready to talk about it.

"She's right Fitz, none of my business." She would grill her later. "So, what do I do about Meilani?"

"Just go talk to her, go take her lunch or something, it takes forty minutes to get to philly anyway, by the time you get there it should be near time to eat. Just talk, don't yell. And kiss and make up and have some freaky office sex. Problem solved." Spencer and Ezra laughed at the tiny brunette, but she was right.

X

Spencer stepped off the elevator on the 55th floor of the Comcast building. It was a little after 1:30 when she arrived. She walked the down the row of cubicles as eyes followed her. She always looked her best when visiting Meilani at work, she wanted to show off what their boss had. Her makeup was flawless, she covered her lips with a pink gloss while her eyeshadow was dramatic and dark. Her naturally wavy hair was pin straight. Her six inch black heels made her stand six feet three inches, but complimented her toned legs. Her black skirt hugged her body and stopped in the middle of her thigh. She topped off her outfit with a white long sleeved shirt that hung low in the front, exposing her chest. Her peacoat jacket hung on her arm as she made her way to Meilani's office, and there wasn't too many people who weren't staring. Their boss' girlfriend was definitely hot.

She stopped in front of Meilani's door, her secretary wasn't at her desk, so she took a breath and walked into the large corner office. Two sets of eyes were on he and two mouths dropped at her presence. She smiled and sat her coat and their lunch on the table between her couches.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt, would you like me to come back?" Spencer was happy that Meilani was looking at her like she wanted to ravish her, step one, check. But so did the man in an expensive suit, sitting across from Meilani.

"Uh, no...we were just chatting." The man stood up and a bright smile spread across his face. He was handsome, but clearly not Spencer's type. "This is Derek Washington, he's the project manager for the new product we're working on."

"Pleasure to meet you..."

"Spencer."

"Yes, uh, Derek, this is Spencer, my girlfriend." The smile faded from his face as he absorbed what he was just told. His cheeks flushed pink at his thoughts. Before he knew this was his boss' girlfriend, he was going to try and get her number. That was out of the question.

"My goodness Meilani, you're a very lucky woman." He said never taking his eyes off Spencer. "I see she brought you lunch, I'll get out of your hair." He shook Spence's hand and was on his way. She couldn't help but be amused at him drooling over her.

"So I'm still your girlfriend?"

"I don't recall breaking up." Meilani said. Spencer locked the door and walked over to Meilani. She took her hands and lead her over to one of the couches. She kissed her, soft at first, but then it turned hungry. She lowered herself on the couch and pulled Meilani on top of her. She couldn't resist Spencer, even if she wanted to. She pushed Spencer's skirt up and went to take her panties off, only there weren't any. She pulled back a little to see a mischievous grin on her girlfriend's lips. Their lips met again and Meilani thrusted her fingers inside of Spencer. Meilani's lips muffled the moans that were coming from Spencer. She moved to her neck and sucked. Every time her fingers come out of her girlfriend, she curled them up, making Spencer damn near scream. Then she thrust them back in with force. In and out, as Spencer pushed her hips towards Meilani's hand. Spencer knew she couldn't last much longer. She loved having quickies in Meilani's office, and this was all the more sweet because they were making up. Meilani shushed Spencer, she didn't want everyone in the building to know what the pair were up to. It didn't take many more thrusts to get Spencer to reach her climax. They laid there, motionless. Meilani kept her fingers inside and Spencer ran her fingers through her dark curls. Step two, check.

"I love you."

"I love you too Spencer, so much."

"Can we talk?"

"Yeah, wanna use my bathroom to freshen up?"

"Sure, thanks." When Spencer came back into the office, Meilani had already started their lunch.

"Sorry, you know I love Chipotle, thank you by the way. For lunch, and the sex."

Spencer chuckled. "My pleasure, _trust me_. So, about yesterday." Spencer picked up her burrito bowl and sat next to Meilani. "Mel, I'm really sorry I got so upset. I didn't mean to yell, and throw you out, I was just really..."

"I understand nani. I had no right to ask you that. I wasn't thinking. I love you and I...well I'm trying to trust you."

"You still don't trust me?" Spencer couldn't have been more hurt.

"It's just really hard for me to do. The fact that I'm so crazy about you doesn't help matters."

"That should be all the more reason to trust me." She sighed and ate a fork full of her food. "Mel, be honest with me do you think Aria and I had sex? Or do you believe me?"

"I believe you. I'm sorry." Step three, check.

"Okay." There was no more that needed to be said. "I also wanted to make sure everything was all set for the party tonight." Spencer asked Meilani to plan a new years party at her mansion so they could invite all their friends.

"Everything is right on schedule."

"Great. Meilani?"

"Yes?"

"I love you." They shared a small kiss and ate the rest of their lunch.

X

The party was in full swing when Toby entered the family room where everyone was gathered. A few people stared and a few murmured, recognizing him from TV. Meilani noticed him first and pointed him out to Aria and Spencer. Aria ran over to him and the gorgeous blonde on his arm. Spencer pulled Meilani over to where they stood. Meilani felt even more guilty about her fight with Spencer when she saw Aria hop in Toby's arms. She kissed him all over his face then pecked his lips. When he set her down her picked Spencer up off the ground and spun her around. She pecked his lips too, then they greeted the blonde.

"Toby this is Ezra...my boyfriend." Aria mumbled.

"Your what?" Toby asked in shock.

"Her boyfriend. Nice to meet you, I love your work, Meilani's chopper is amazing, quality work." Ezra said.

"Aw man thanks a lot." Toby shook Ezra's hand. "This is my girlfriend Lily." Lily greeted Ezra and Meilani. "Mel, so nice to see you again." He leaned in to give her a hug. "How's that chopper treating you?"

"It's fantastic, but he's lonely since I can't ride him. I should move somewhere warm and sunny."

"You aren't going anywhere." Spencer wrapped her arms around Meilani's waist and kissed her.

X

"He told me he loved me."

Spencer's jaw dropped and she smiled wide. "He did? What did you say?" She and Aria were in Meilani's bedroom. She took her upstairs to ask what was going on between her and the AP calculus teacher.

"Well, I kissed him and as you saw, we never made it to the bedroom."

"It happened last night? No wonder you had your panties in a bunch when I asked about you two. So...do you love him?" Spencer already knew the answer. Aria had a three month rule, no one gets past three months. Like clockwork, on the day that marks three months, whoever she's dealing with gets dumped. They had been dating a week over her deadline. She had never seen Aria in love, but she knew what it looked like. She couldn't have been happier she finally found someone special.

"I don't know..."

"Sure you do." They were seated on Meilani's bed. Spencer put her hand on Aria's face to get a good look in her eyes. "Sure you do munchkin. I'd know that look anywhere."

"I don't know what to do with this Spencer, I know how to fuck. I know how to have a good time. I _do not_ know how to love someone."

"You love me don't you?"

"It's not the same."

"All I'm trying to say is you _do_ know how to love. It may be a different kind of love, but you know how. Just be with the guy, you don't have to do anything special. Except maybe one thing."

"What's that?"

"Tell him you love him. Here, practice on me."

"Okay...Ezra, I love you."

"That wasn't so hard was it?"

"I think I'm going to puke."

"Stop being dramatic Aria." They laughed, hugged, and headed back to the party.

"Ten, nine, eight..." Everyone shouted.

"You know," Meilani started looking up in Spencer's eyes, "they say the person you kiss on New years is the person you'll spend your year with."

"Oh really?" When the room erupted with "Happy New Year!" Spencer leaned down and captured her girlfriend's lips. She hoped she would spend the rest of her life on every new years with her.

X

Emily couldn't wait to give Ms. Hastings her Valentine's day muffins. She made up a recipe to make raspberry muffins and she hoped she would like them. Although she was very happy in her almost two month long relationship with Samara, she still had a major crush on her English teacher. She stopped in front of her door and her heart stopped at the sight. Ms. Hastings had her tongue down a very attractive woman's throat. A part of her felt excited to learn she was gay, and another part felt sad she had a girlfriend. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door. They two women separated and Ms. Hastings blushed.

"Emily, what are you doing here so early?" Even though Emily often came in early to see her, she was a little embarrassed to have been caught making out with Meilani.

"I...I wanted to...I made you muffins."

Spencer instantly forgot about her faux pas and perked up, she loved it when Emily brought her treats. "Blueberry?"

"No, I came up with a new recipe. They're raspberry." Emily held out the tupperware for Spencer to take while eyeing the woman she didn't recognize.

"Oh, that sounds tasty. Oh geez, where are my manners. Meilani this is Emily, Emily this is Meilani."

"Your girlfriend." It was a statement not a question.

"Yes her girlfriend, and you're her favorite student." Emily blushed and Spencer playfully slapped Meilani's arm.

"You're not suppose to say that. I'll deny it if you ever told anyone, but yeah you're my favorite."

Emily felt giddy at the confession. "I'll deny it if you ever tell anyone, but you're my favorite teacher. Happy Valentine's day."

"Thank you Emily." She smiled brightly and took the muffins. "Happy Valentine's day to you too. Do you have someone special?"

"Yeah I do actually, someone really special. I guess I'll head over to the music room and let you two finish making out. Nice to meet you Meilani." Spencer and Meilani laughed and felt slightly embarrassed. They enjoyed Emily's marvelous muffins and resumed their makeout session.

X

Spencer slept peacefully with Meilani by her side. They stayed the night over at Spencer's since it was her birthday. Meilani had a huge surprise at her house and didn't want her to ruin it. Spencer didn't mind if they slept at her house or Meilani's as long as they were together. And for the last six months they have been, happily. Her telephone vibrating woke her out her sleep, she kept her eyes shut as she fumbled to answer the call that was coming well before her 6am alarm.

"Hello?"

"Bugg."

Spencer's heart stopped. Her eyes shot open, she didn't say anything. Her mind raced and images of her skin, her smile, her body, her long dark hair, those eyes, invaded her sight. The sound of her laughter flooded her ears, then came the sound of her moans increasing in volume making her heart start to beat again, faster than it's normal pace. She couldn't possibly be calling. What for, why now? This was the last thing she needed or wanted. Her life was perfect. How could she call? How did she find the nerve? After all these years, all the pain, all the tears. What did she want?

"Bugg?" She waited for Spencer to respond hoping she hadn't hung up.


	15. SPECIAL DELIVERY

Spencer's breath hitched. "Maya."

**THE LAST CLIFF HANGER WAS TO MESS WITH YOU GUYS, ****I DARE YOU NOT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS ONE HAHA...I HAVE BEEN WAITING SO LONG TO TELL YOU GUYS! OUT OF ALL THE REVIEWS AND PMs I'VE GOTTEN, ONLY ONE OF YOU GUESSED MAYA, I'M NOT SURE WHO BC THEY WERE A GUEST, BUT GOOD JOB. IT'S BEEN MAYA ALL ALONG. IF YOU'RE GOOD, I'LL HAVE THEIR FIRST CONVERSATION AND EVERYTHING THAT PROCEEDS COMING SHORTLY. BUT ONLY IF YOU'RE GOOD...**

**SIDE NOTE: A TON OF YOU REALLY LIKE MEL AND SPENCE & SAMMY AND EMILY TOGETHER...SORRY TO DO IT, BUT THIS IS A SPEMILY FANFIC...SO PREPARE YOUR TISSUES. THEY BOTH WILL HAVE NICE LONG RELATIONSHIPS THOUGH, WITH A FEW TIME JUMPS. BUT I DO ALREADY KNOW HOW BOTH RELATIONSHIPS WILL END, AND HOW SPENCER AND EMILY WILL BEGIN. HOPE YOU ENJOY IT, AND HOPE I CAN DO SPEMILY JUSTICE. ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU GUYS LOVE THE OTHER PAIRINGS SO MUCH.**

**ALSO: I KNOW I HAVE SHARED SOME PMs WITH SOME OF YOU REGARDING HANNA. THE STORY TOOK SOME UNEXPECTED TURNS IN MY MIND...SO YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO GO A LITTLE LONGER. I'VE DECIDED TO INTRODUCE HER IN A DIFFERENT WAY THAN I ORGINALLY PLANNED, WHICH WILL TAKE ME A LITTLE LONGER TO GET THERE. Y'ALL REALLY LOVE HANNA HUH? I WILL TOTALLY MAKE UP FOR THE LACK OF HANNA THUS FAR. BARE WITH ME.**

**ONE MORE THING: JUST TO CLEAR UP THE "TIME" IT'S MARCH 14TH WHICH IS SPENCER'S AND EMILY'S BIRTHDAY (IT ALSO HAPPENS TO BE MINE) SO THAT MAKES IT SIX MONTHS SINCE THE STORY STARTED. REMEMBER IT STARTED IN SEPTEMBER, SHE MET MEILANI AFTER HER FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. SAMMY AND EMILY HAVE BEEN TOGETHER ABOUT THREE MONTHS NOW. HOPE THAT CLEARS UP ANY CONFUSION. THERE WILL BE MORE TIME JUMPS (OBVIOUSLY) BUT I'M NOT SURE WHEN, THERE'S STILL SO MUCH THAT HAS TO HAPPEN...I'D ALSO LIKE TO CLEAR UP MAYA AND NAYA RIVERA BEING CO-STARS**

**THEY BOTH ARE IN THE VAMPIRE MOVIE THAT MEL TOOK SPENCE TO SEE...NAYA IS ONE OF THE VAMPIRES AS IS COLTON HAYNES.**

**SNEEK PEEK: MAYA WILL BE A HANDFUL...**

**TALK TO ME PEOPLE...THOUGHTS?**

**SERIOUSLY, HOW DO YOU FEEL? WHAT DO YOU THINK?**


	16. Chapter 13

**_This chapter is dedicated to Breyanaxo, just because you seem to be enjoying this story more than anyone and oh yeah, you're awesome..._**

"Bugg?" She waited for Spencer to respond hoping she hadn't hung up.

Spencer's breath hitched. "Maya."

"Hey, it's good to hear..."

"What do you want?" Spencer asked cutting Maya off.

"To say happy birthday."

"You've missed a few birthdays, now all of a sudden you want to call? Why do you even still have my number?"

"I couldn't bring myself to delete it. I'm glad it's still the same."

She looked over at a sleeping Meilani. "I've had the same number since I was fourteen, no use in changing it."

"If you did, then people like me wouldn't be able to get a hold of you." Maya said regretfully.

"Is there something else you wanted? I have to get ready for work."

"You're teaching right?"

"Yeah."

"Where? You still in Cali?"

"No, Maya, I have to go."

"Wait, Bugg..."

"Stop calling me that!" Spencer demanded in a hushed voice, she didn't need Meilani waking up right now. She couldn't stomach the affectionately given nickname a second longer. Maya started calling her ladybug after the two of them saw a picture of ladybugs mating while studying entomology for a science project. After awhile she shortened it to just "Bugg".

"Okay, okay, sorry Spencer. I just...miss you." This was more than Spencer could bare. "It takes me all the willpower I have every single day not to call you. I miss you so much I can't stand it."

"Is that all Maya, I have to go." Spencer knew she should just hang up, but couldn't find the strength.

"I guess so. Well...enjoy your day."

"Thanks."

"You're very welcome Bugg. Bye."

X

Spencer stared at her ceiling for a half hour until her alarm went of. She was so lost in her thoughts, Meilani had to reach over her to turn it off.

"You okay?" When she didn't get a response she shook Spencer violently, fearing something was terribly wrong. "Spencer!"

"Huh?"

"You scared me half to death, you looked like you weren't even breathing. Jesus! Don't do that to me!" Meilani was visibly shaken, so Spencer pulled her on top of her and held her close.

"I'm sorry baby, I was just...reflecting."

"Nani, you just turned only twenty three, how much reflecting can you do? Speaking of, happy birthday!" Meilani said cheerfully.

"Thank you baby." She strained a smile. "I have to get ready for work."

"Right. Don't forget I'm coming to pick you up for a late breakfast, so don't eat too many cupcakes."

"I don't know Mel. If Emily's cupcakes are half as good as her muffins, I can't make any promises." Spencer's favorite student offered to make homemade cupcakes oppose to letting Spencer buy some, but only for their birthday.

"Well just try. Hey," Spencer was already at her door headed to the bathroom to shower. "I love you."

"I love you too Mel." Once again her smile was strained and she hoped Meilani hadn't noticed.

X

Emily normally walked to school, but since she offered to bake cupcakes for Ms. Hastings' birthday, she offered to pick her up. She arrived at 7:10, and Emily was already on her porch waiting. Spencer helped her get the cupcakes in the car and headed towards school. Spencer was still very distracted, aside from good morning, she didn't say anything else.

"Spencer?"

"Yes?"

"Are you okay?" Spencer sighed and didn't answer. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to...it's none of my business."

"No I'm sorry Emily. I just had a really rough morning."

"On your birthday? That sucks."

Even though she was giving Emily a ride because she made her cupcakes, she had forgotten it was their birthday. "Shoot Emily, I'm so sorry, you must think I'm a jerk, happy birthday sweetie."

Emily couldn't control her heart rate when Spencer called her sweetie. "T-thank you. Um, happy birthday to you too."

They stopped at a red light. Spencer looked over at Emily who was smiling at her. Even though she was her student, Spencer couldn't ignore how stunning she was. Spencer thought to herself that Emily was going to be a heartbreaker not too long from now. "Am I still you favorite teacher?"

"Of course, forever."

"Good." Spencer gave her a wink and started to move the car again.

X

"Okay guys, if I ask you "How many times have you been to the mall in the last month?", how would you answer?"

Sean raised his hand, Spencer pointed to him giving him the go to answer. "Five times."

"Really, five times in a month?" Spencer asked laughing.

"Yeah well, I gotta stay fly for the ladies." Some of the students giggled, and his best friend Ryan gave him a high five.

"Okay Mr. Fly. But you answered the question wrong."

"How?"

"When you get asked a question, whether it be in English class or any other, you always answer it by using the question itself. So if I ask this question the appropriate response would be "I've been to the mall five times this month". Always use the question in your response, understand?" Most of the students nodded and looked like they understood. "Great! Now when you ace all your tests in other classes you can thank me. I accept gifts by the way, cash will do as well." She laughed with her students, which was a daily occurrence, she loved them and they loved her. "Okay, everyone pull out your copy of..."

Her mind must have been playing tricks on her when her classroom door opened and Maya walked through. The closer Maya got to her the more she realized, this was no trick. Maya smiled at her students as most of them began to whisper, while other's jaws dropped. Spencer knew her face had betrayed her. If she ever saw Maya again she wanted to appear unfazed, but that wasn't possible with her showing up so unexpectedly.

"Happy birthday Bugg." Maya handed Spencer a bouquet of a dozen long stemmed red roses.

Emily knew who the actress was, she even liked a few of her movies, but seeing how Ms. Hastings looked at her, she knew she wasn't just a friend, she knew they were lovers. Her blood began to boil.

"Class," she cleared her throat, trying to find her voice. "this is my childhood friend, Maya St. Germain. Maya this is my first period ninth grade English class." Spencer managed to get out while placing the flowers on her desk.

"I love you! Can I have your autograph!"

"Aw that's so sweet, sure." Maya smiled at Sean.

"Everyone settle down please, if Maya doesn't mind signing her autograph, then we can do that towards the end of class." She glanced at the clock.

"I don't mind at all." Spencer wished Maya would stop looking at her like a piece of meat in front of her students. "So, I can stay and watch you teach?"

"I guess so."

"Good. I'll just..." Maya took a seat in the chair Spencer kept by her desk, their eyes still locked.

Spencer tried as best she could to continue discussing one of her favorite novels, To kill a mockingbird. Which she assigned a week earlier, and couldn't wait to read her students interpretations of. But it was becoming increasingly difficult with her ex-girlfriend's eyes piercing into her. When she was done with her lesson and it was ten minutes until class was over, Spencer allowed her class to line up to get autographs. Most of them got pictures with the movie star too. Except Emily, she stayed seated and quietly looked out the window while the other students fawned all over Maya. Spencer figured she probably wasn't a fan.

"If I thought you were a cool teacher before, actually you're the coolest person in the world!" Sean exclaimed much to the amusement of Spencer and Maya. Sean couldn't help wrapping his arms around his favorite teacher just as the bell rang. "It was so awesome to meet you Maya, see you later Ms. Hastings." The class reluctantly filed out of the class.

"Alright guys, get out of here, I don't want any of you to be late to your next class, out, out." She pushed the last one out and closed the door.

"Do you have another class?" Maya asked.

"No, not for another hour or so. Second period is my free period."

"Oh, so do you want to go to breakfast?"

"No I don't want to go to breakfast with you! What are you doing here?"

"I have this month off, so instead of sitting at home alone in Los Angeles, I came to stay with my mom."

"That explains what you're doing in Philly, why are you in Rosewood?"

"I wanted to say happy birthday."

"You said that this morning." Spencer snarled.

"I wanted to say it to your face. Damn Bugg, you look...so, so good.." She licked her lips slowly while looking spencer up and down, then her bottom lip got caught between her teeth. "You look amazing actually." She moved closer to Spencer. "Better than I remember."

"How did you know where I worked?"

"I might have bribed your mom with some donuts. After you hung up on me I went to her office. I figured she be there, your parents live in that place. Her staff was really excited to see me, and the Krispy Kremes. We chatted for a bit, and I casually asked where you were teaching." Spencer made a mental note to kill her mother. "I miss you Bugg." Maya was only half a foot away from Spencer, and she felt her insides begin to ignite. As much as she wanted to loath Maya, she was still very much attracted to her.

"Don't call me that." Spencer said through clenched teeth.

"You'll always be my LadyBugg." Maya pulled her hair back and pulled her ear down, revealing the matching tattoo she and Spencer had gotten behind their left ears. It was a red ladybug, but Maya had added the word "LadyBugg" by it, Spencer wondered when she did that. Then she absentmindedly touched her own tattoo.

"Ladybug has one "g"." Spencer said matter of factly.

"You're too special for just one "g"." Maya tried to touch Spencer's face but she knew if she let her, the little amount of composure she had would dissipate. "Please Bugg let me explain. I know I fucked up but there are some things you don't know, and some things you think you know that you're wrong about, I finally found the courage to..."

"You have to leave, my girlfriend will be here soon." Spencer felt a tinge of satisfaction over the face Maya made, she actually looked hurt.

Maya closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "Good, I wanna meet her, make sure she's not too much competition."

"Maya would you just..."

"Hey nani, you ready?" Her smile vanished quickly when she saw Maya. Spencer put a little distance between Meilani and Maya, stepping in front of her ex.

"Hi, Maya St. Germain. You must be the girlfriend." Meilani didn't even look at her.

"What is she doing here?" Each word dripped with venom.

"She just showed up, baby, relax."

"How am I supposed to relax when I come in and you're with your ex?"

"She was just leaving." Spencer turned around to face Maya and shot her a pleading look. She didn't want her and Meilani to get into any type of altercation. Meilani knows taekwondo, but Maya could handle herself. Spencer shuddered at the possibility.

"Right, I was. It was so good to see you Bugg. I hope we can catch up, like I said, I'll be here all month and some of April."

"Don't forget your flowers." Meilani told Maya with her eyes on the bouquet.

"Of course, don't want to forget those." Maya grabbed the flowers with a smile and walked past the couple.

"What the fuck was she doing here?!" Meilani yelled as soon as the door closed.

"I told you, she just showed up." Spencer replied cooly.

"And you let her come in?".

"We were in front of my students, what was I supposed to do?"

"Tell her to eat shit and die!" Meilani yelled with rage in her eyes. In the six months they'd been together, she had only raised her voice at Spencer once. Sure they had debates and disagreements here and there but she was the most gentle, soft spoken person she's ever met. Seeing her enraged was, shocking to say the least.

"I'm sorry I didn't get rid of her sooner." Spencer moved towards Meilani to touch her face, but she pulled away.

"What did she want? Was she trying to get you back?"

"I..." She didn't want to lie. "I don't know why she was here, I guess she wanted to explain what happened between us all those years ago."

"Explain?!" Meilani was livid. She stepped closer and Spencer backed away. She wasn't sure, but she thought Meilani was angry enough to strike her. Before she could move away again, Meilani had her wrapped in her arms. "What's there to explain? She had you, she lost you, and now you belong to me. You're mine and If she thinks..." Spencer kissed her. The jealous version of her girlfriend frightened her and turned her on at the same time. Although she was tense, she kissed her back.

"You're right." She said once she broke the kiss. "I am yours, I do belong to you. There is nothing she could say or do to change that, I promise. Please calm down baby. I love you." She kissed her again. This time Meilani relaxed into the kiss.

"I'm so sorry I yelled beautiful." Her voice was back to it's normal soft, low rasp. "The thought of her coming in here and trying to take you away from me...I can't lose you. I know you two have a lot of history and..."

"And that's exactly what it is. History. And that's how it will stay. I'm yours, all yours." Spencer tightened her arms around her neck and Meilani leaned into her touch with her arms around her waist.

"I love you so much beautiful. I just can't...now that I have you, I can't imagine breathing without you." She looked up at the taller woman and let a tear fall. "I don't want to know what it is to be without you...ever again." Spencer wiped her tear.

"Oh baby, I'm here."

"Spencer," She was being serious and she wanted her to how serious. "I don't think you understand what I'm saying here...I want to spend my life with you."

"You...do?"

"Yes." They didn't say anything else, they just held one another until the next bell rung.

At lunch Emily eyed Ms. Hastings. The same bothered look was painted on her face. She figured her rough morning had to do with Maya St. Germain, and when she showed up, she must have made her day worse. Emily then had an idea how to cheer her teacher up. When she tried to excuse herself from the table, Mona was less than pleased.

"Em, you never pay us any attention anymore and you're trying to run off again? What are you going to hang with your new best friend _Sammy_? Don't you see her enough?" Mona was always on Emily's case about how much time she spent with Samara, but she just ignored her.

"I have something I have to go do, and it has nothing to do with Sammy, okay?"

"Whatever."

"Hey, you still coming over to the tree house later right?" Paige asked. On each of their birthdays they had a sleep over, even on school nights, it was tradition.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world Paige, so I'll see you guys later?" She didn't wait for her two best friends to respond before she headed over to the teachers table.

"Sp...Ms. Hastings?"

"Yes Emily?"

"Could I talk to you for a moment? It's really important."

"Of course Em, is everything okay?" She got up and put her hand on Emily's shoulder. The touch sent a chill up and down her spine.

"Yeah...um, I don't know, could we walk and talk?" Spencer nodded her head and told the art and calculus teachers she'd be right back. Emily lead Spencer into the music room, she sat at the piano and motioned for Spencer to sit beside her. Spencer sat patiently as Emily thought to herself. She looked at Spencer and her heart did a dance. Emily thought Spencer was more than gorgeous. She especially loved the two moles on the left side of her face. The one below her eye was her favorite. "Spencer, opps, I know it's school hours, but we're alone..."

"That's fine Em, as long as other students aren't around, I wouldn't want anyone getting too jealous." She smiled gleamingly at her student.

"Spencer, I'm not sure why that actress showing up got you so upset, but I have a feeling she's the reason you were so out of it this morning." Spencer shifted uncomfortably at how astute Emily was. "It's obviously none of my business, and I would never tell anyone you're gay, I wouldn't want anyone to do that to me." Emily watched as Spencer's eyes expanded in shock. "But I have some idea why her presence clearly made you uncomfortable. Don't worry, I think I'm the only one that noticed, they were all drooling over her."

"Emily..."

"No it's okay, like I said, none of my business, but you _are_ my business, being my favorite teacher and all. And I don't like to see you upset so...I thought I'd try my hand at cheering you up." She faced the piano keys and took a deep breath. She never played in front of anyone, not even Samara. She cracked her knuckles and placed her finger on the keys. She began playing "Superwoman" by Alicia Keys.

_Everywhere I'm turning_  
_ Nothing seems complete_  
_ I stand up and I'm searching_  
_ For the better part of me_  
_ I hang my head from sorrow_  
_ state of humanity_  
_ I wear it on my shoulders_  
_ Gotta find the strength in me_

_ Cause I am a Superwoman_  
_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes she is_  
_ Even when I'm a mess_  
_ I still put on a vest_  
_ With an S on my chest_  
_ Oh yes_  
_ I'm a Superwoman_

_ For all the mothers fighting_  
_ For better days to come_  
_ And all my women, all my women sitting here trying_  
_ To come home before the sun_  
_ And all my sisters_  
_ Coming together_  
_ Say yes I will_  
_ Yes I can_

_ Cause I am a Superwoman_  
_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes she is_  
_ Even when I'm a mess_  
_ I still put on a vest_  
_ With an S on my chest_  
_ Oh yes_  
_ I'm a Superwoman_

_ When I'm breaking down_  
_ And I can't be found_  
_ And I start to get weak_  
_ Cause no one knows_  
_ Me underneath these clothes_  
_ But I can fly_  
_ We can fly, Oh_

_ Cause I am a Superwoman_  
_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes she is_  
_ Even when I'm a mess_  
_ I still put on a vest_  
_ With an S on my chest_  
_ Oh yes_  
_ I'm a Superwoman _

She closed her eyes and belted out the last part of the song, trying to put as much feeling in it as she could. Every lyric was exactly how she felt about Spencer and she hoped she could brighten her day a little. It was her birthday after all.

_ Oh, let me tell you I am a Superwoman,_  
_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes she is_  
_ Even when I'm a mess_  
_ I still put on a vest_  
_ With an S on my chest_  
_ Oh yes_  
_ I'm a Superwoman_

_ I'm a Superwoman_

_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes we are_  
_ Yes I am_  
_ Yes you are_

The last four lines of the song she looked at Spencer who had tears streaming down her face, but her smile was wide.

"Emily, goodness gracious, your voice...it's incredible. Thank you so much." Without a second thought she pulled Emily close to her and hugged her. Emily, a little thrown off by the contact, tensed a little. Once she realized what was happening she grabbed Spencer just as tightly. They sat there embracing for a few moments, Emily was in an unearthly state of bliss. There were so many moments she wished she could have hugged Spencer, plus much more, this moment was perfect. Spencer sniffed a bit and pulled away. She wiped her tears of joy and shook her hands. "Emily, you've got me all shaken up. I have goose bumps your voice is so powerful. I wish you would reconsider your career path, it's not proper to hide such a gift."

Emily was blushing hard, she was sure she mirrored a tomato. "It's not easy singing ang playing in front of people Spencer. Actually...I _never_ play or sing for people. I just did it for you cause you were so sad and no one should be sad on their birthday, plus...you're really special." She looked away from Spencer and hoped she didn't see the longing in her eyes.

"You're the special one. I'm so honored you performed for me, you have no idea what it means to me." She gave Emily another hug, this one was shorter but just as sweet. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome."

"Listen, come to my class after school, I have something for you. I was going to give it to you at the end of class today but..."

"She showed up."

"Yeah. Hey, you sensed something was wrong, is that why you didn't ask for her autograph?"

"I can't like anybody who upsets you. I'm going to go home hand throw away her DVDs."

Spencer laughed. "You don't have to do that."

"Yes I do, I _hate_ her now."

Spencer couldn't identify the feeling she was having. It could have been pride from just hearing her sing or it could have been joy because she Emily cared so much about her. Whatever it was, it was so strong, she didn't even mind that Emily used her least favorite word.

**TALK TO ME PEOPLE. WHAT YA THINK? ANY QUESTIONS? THOUGHTS? COMMENTS?**


	17. Chapter 14

**Guest 6/23/13 . chapter 14**

**I really liked that chapter, I love the confidence that Samara brings out of Emily when they're together. I honestly could read your writing for hours and hours! How often do you update by the way?**

**WELL, GUEST, THANK YOU! AND I UPDATE A TON. AND IF YOU GUYS HAVEN'T NOTICED THE MORE YOU TALK TO ME,** **THE MORE I UPDATE. THIS MAKES WHAT, 3 DAYS IN A ROW? KEEP TALKING, I'LL KEEP UPDATING AS QUICKLY. YOU INSPIRE ME...**

**BTW, THERE WILL BE SOME EMILY/SAMARA NASTY TIME (NOT SEXY, NASTY!) SO IF YOU AREN'T A FAN OF SMUT, PLEASE SKIP THAT PART...**

**THANKYOU**

**-MANAGEMENT**

The card that Spencer gave Emily had been read and reread three times before she even thought to go look for Samara. She was taking Emily over to her house since Emily had a sleepover, plus she needed privacy to give Emily her gift. She was excited to see Samara's new car. She just passed her driver's test and received her junior license. Emily couldn't wait to open the carefully wrapped present Spencer gave her either. She ripped it open to find a novel by Wyatt Webb. "The Five Steps To Conquering Fear And Self Doubt" Emily read out loud. She opened it up and there was a note written inside.

_Dear Emily,_

_I know I constantly encourage you to follow your dreams, and I know you're scared. So here's a book I think might help you come out of that shell of yours. You've got the talent to make it, now all you need is the courage._

_HAPPY READING,_

_Your favorite teacher..._

She smiled to herself and read her card for a fourth time.

_Dear Super awesome student of mine,_

_I don't normally give students birthday cards or gifts for that matter, but you're my favorite and we share a birthday, so I made an exception. I know you have trouble realizing how special you are, so I making it my personal mission to help you. Guess what? You're special! I'm not sure what it is about you, but you've got "it" whatever "it" is...you've got it. I really hope that the whole world will know what I know someday. Perhaps your present will help you get to a place where you feel comfortable sharing your gift. You're amazing and I wish you knew it._

_Have a very happy birthday Emily!_

_Sincerely,_

_The best teacher in the history of the universe (hehe)_

Emily let out a content sigh, closed her eyes, and held her card and the book to her chest. After slightly coming down off her high, she searched for Samara. She was near the football field, behind the bleachers, where she regularly skipped class and smoked weed with her friends. Emily hated that Samara didn't take school as seriously as she should, but Samara promised her she wouldn't fail again. The 12th grader Samara was smoking with saw Emily approaching first. He nudged Samara who turned and gave the birthday girl a bright smile. Noel Kahn was Samara's best friend and the only other person who knew about their relationship besides Paige.

"Hey sexy." Samara pulled her girlfriend in for a quick kiss and embrace. "What ya got there?"

"Hey guys. It's just a book." Emily hid the card in the pages of the book, those words for her eyes only. She put the book in her backpack.

"You ready to see my new car?" Samara asked, blowing out smoke.

"Yeah I am, what is it?" Samara and Noel started to laugh.

"You'll see. Wanna smoke?"

"No thank you." Emily smoked with Samara from time to time, but she didn't want to be high knowing she'd be around Paige and Mona later.

"Come on, it's your birthday. You only turn fifteen once freshman." Noel said.

"You only turn every age once Noel." Emily quipped.

He let out a hearty laugh. "Tell that to my mom! She's been thirty five a while now." They all laughed. Samara and Emily said goodbye to Noel and headed for the student parking lot.

"Okay close your eyes, no wait, turn around, I'll pull the car out. When I beep my horn, turn back around." Emily obliged her girlfriend's silly request.

When she turned around after hearing the horn, her jaw dropped, Samara sat behind the wheel of a shiny silver brand new Bentley Continental GT coupe. "Your parents got you a Bentley?!" Emily practically scream, climbing inside the passenger seat.

Samara just shrugged. "They told me to write down three cars that I wanted. I put this, a Ferrari, and a Bugatti, just to be a smart ass. I figured they come home with a Benz or a beamer, but when I woke up this morning, this was sitting in the driveway."

"These things are like half a million dollars!" Emily said still in shock.

Samara laughed. "No they aren't. This was only 220,000. My dad makes like 1.5 million a year and my mom doesn't do too shabby either, this didn't hurt their pockets."

"You're dad's a millionaire?" Samara nodded, then pulled off.

"Then why don't you go to one of those uppercrust uber expensive private schools?"

"Got kicked out. Besides, for a public school, Rosewood high is a quality education. Look at the area we live in. Rosewood is the equivalent to a private school in the city."

"I suppose that's true. So, what in the world did you get kicked out for."

"Got caught having sex in the teacher's lounge." She noticed the grimace on Emily's face. "Look the girl was hot and there was a couch." Emily just shook her head and turned the radio up.

X

"Is this blindfold necessary?" Emily asked Samara as she tied it behind her head.

"Very." Samara whispered seductively in her ear. She told Emily to take off all her clothes with the exception of her underwear and sat her in a chair in the middle of her bedroom.

"Where's your nanny?"

"I don't know, probably with her boyfriend."

"And your parents? What if they catch us?"

"They haven't caught us yet have they?"

"No."

"So stop worrying. Besides my door is locked. Now...are you ready for your gift?"

"If it's sex, then yes."

"You're so nasty Em, I'm glad I'm the only one who knows that." She leaned into Emily's ear again. "And if I had my way, I'd be the only one to ever know." Emily felt a pounding in her chest after hearing those words, and a throbbing between her legs. She wanted Samara all the time, everywhere, but she would never tell her that. Emily heard "Slow Wind" by R. Kelly begin to come from a set of speakers.

"What do you know about R. Kelly Sammy?"

"What do you?" She laughed. "Take the blindfold off." Emily's mouth began to water at the sight of her girlfriend. Samara was wearing a white buttoned shirt with only two of the buttons done, which showed off the fire red lace bra she had on behind it. Her thong matched her bra and so did her platform pumps. Her hips were doing exactly what R. Kelly was asking in the song, slowly winding. Emily already knew Samara could move her hips, but this was different. The fire that was burning inside of Emily was unlike any other, she'd never been more turned on in her life.

"Wow Sammy...you're so damn beautiful."

"Thank you baby, you aren't too bad yourself." She smiled at Emily. She still thought she was the most beautiful girl in the world. "You like you present?"

"It's the best birthday gift I have ever gotten. Could you come here so I can unwrap it?" Earlier Emily was told she could not move from her seat, so she was trying to obey the rules. But with her girlfriend looking so delectable, she was finding it difficult to stay put.

"Not yet." Samara continued her sexy dance torturing Emily as the song went on. She unbuttoned the buttons that were keeping her body obstructed. She opened the shirt, took it off, and threw it at Emily's feet. She put her hands above her head and turned her back to Emily in the process. Her hips rolled as she bent over, keeping her legs straight. She saw Emily hold tight to the sides of the chair, pleased with the effect she was having on her. While still bent over, she pulled her thong to the side and touched herself. Emily had seen Samara touch herself plenty of times before, but watching this made her want to pounce on her. She rubbed small circles then placed two fingers inside eliciting a whimper. She stood up straight and faced Emily again, still dancing to the music. She sauntered over to Emily.

"Open your mouth." She did. Samara stuck her fingers in her mouth and Emily sucked them clean. "Good baby?" Unable to form actual words, Emily nodded. Samara put her six inch heel on the chair between Emily's thighs. She maintained her dance and Emily watched in confoundment. She took her foot down and sat on Emily's lap with her back to her front. She rolled her hips to the beat and could feel Emily's arousal on her cheek. Emily grabbed her girlfriend's breast and Samara tilted her head back on to Emily's shoulder. Her hips were still moving as Emily began biting her neck.

"Can I take this off?" Emily asked with both of her hands filled with Samara's breasts.

"Yes. What else do you want? It's _your_ birthday."

"I want you in my mouth. Right now!" Emily took Samara's bra off and she got up from her lap. She pulled Emily up as well and lead her over to the bed.

"You sure? I'm supposed to be pleasuring you."

"I'm sure, it's my gift isn't it?"

"Yes it sure is."

"You're all mine right?" Emily asked.

"Yes I am."

"Well take off that thong." Samara went for her shoe first, but Emily stopped her. "No, leave those on."

"See, you're so fucking nasty and I love it. I thought you were suppose to be unwrapping your present yourself." Samara said gesturing to the only clothing left on her body. Emily happily pulled the thong down and quickly attached her mouth to her girlfriend's center. "Oh my God Em...yes, fuck...yes!" Samara clutched Emily's hair pushing her deeper and keeping her in place. Samara was proud of everything she taught her and hoped no one else would ever benefit from her hard work. Emily put her hands behind Samara's knees and lifted her legs, she pushed them back and held them in place while she feasted on her. "You love eating this pussy don't you?"

"Mmm hmm." Emily moaned against Samara. She seldom talked dirty in the bedroom, but she loved it when Samara did. Emily stuck her tongue inside Samara which drove the both of them crazy. Samara loved feeling her skilled tongue inside of her and Emily loved the direct access to her juices. Samara started to squirm under Emily and they both knew she was close. Emily let go of her legs and took her tongue out. She licked Samara up and down causing her to scream out Emily's name. She put her fingers inside and pumped at a vigorous pace. She put her mouth back on her and sucked and nibbled while her fingers worked inside her girlfriend.

"Em...fuck! Don't stop. Oh my God...yes, right there. You ready for me to come in your mouth?"

"Mmm hmm." Emily sped up her thrusts and Samara exploded on her fingers and into her mouth. Emily removed her fingers and replaced them with her tongue. She got on her knees and lifted Samara's lower body up onto her lap. She spread her legs wide and pumped her tongue in and out. Once she had drank enough of her girlfriend she started sucking her again. Emily moved her hands around Samara so that she was hugging her stomach, lifting her lower body on Emily's chest. Emily didn't have to suck long before Samara reached her peak again. She repeated sticking her tongue in her girlfriend to lick her clean, while prolonging her orgasm. Yes, Emily was a good student and a fast learner.

Emily gently lowered Samara's body back down on the bed. She didn't give her much time to recuperate before she took her own underwear off and sat on Samara's face. "Eat." Samara took Emily into her mouth and breathed heavily through her nose. She still hadn't recovered her breathing, but it _was_ Emily's birthday. Emily sat lightly on Samara's chest and rocked her hips back and forth on her expert tongue. Emily couldn't imagine that anyone on earth knew how to use their tongue better than her girlfriend. She didn't talk, and Samara wasn't in a position to say much either. The room was filled with only Emily's deafening moans and Samara slurping her up. Emily surprised Samara when she, out of nowhere, turned her body around. She used her fingers to spread Emily's lips and went right back to work, enjoying her meal. No girl had ever tasted like Emily, no girl had ever made her feel anything. It was always just meaningless sex. But with Emily, her heart swelled with emotions. Emily rode her face from the back and was close to coming. She dipped her head down to take Samara into her mouth again. They both sucked, licked, and swallowed each other until both climaxed into each other's mouths. Emily loved swallowing everything Samara had to offer and the feeling was mutual. They licked each other clean, and Emily rolled off her girlfriend. Once Samara caught her breath, she repositioned herself so that she now laid her head on Emily's chest. Emily put her arms around her and Samara laid her arm on her stomach.

"You keeping the heels on...that was hot."

"Oh you liked that huh?"

"Yeah, that was a really sexy birthday present."

"Well I'm glad you enjoyed it. Emily?"

"Yeah?" Emily asked with her arms holding Samara tightly and her eyes closed.

"I...I need to tell you something."

"That doesn't sound good." Emily Loosened her grip and opened her eyes. Samara propped herself up on one elbow and looked down at her devastatingly beautiful girlfriend.

"It's not bad I promise." Samara said with a shy smile. "Emily do you know how gorgeous you are?" Samara shook her head in disbelief. She had never been so attracted to someone in her life. "Emily you're so beautiful inside and out. Em, there's something I've been keeping from you."

Emily got scared and tears threatened her eyes. Samara said it wasn't bad, but it was sounding that way. "How could you keep something from me? I thought we told each other everything?"

"I know, I know...but I just haven't known how to tell you this."

"Just say it Sammy."

"I...I, uh..."

"Samara, please, you're scaring me."

"I love you." She was barely audible, but Emily heard her. She had strong feelings for Samara but she had never thought to decipher them. It wasn't until this very moment that she questioned whether or not it was love. Samara loved her, and she had been keeping that fact from her. Maybe she knew Emily wasn't sure how she felt, maybe she was scared she did know, and didn't love her back. Was this love?

"I've never...have you ever..." Emily didn't know what she was trying to ask exactly, but Samara was quick.

"I have never felt like this about anyone Emily." She sat all the way up, so did Emily. They were facing one another and Samara took her hands. "Actually I never felt anything at all for anyone. I always thought I would just have fun with chicks and dispose of them when they weren't useful anymore. I figured I'd live this bachelorette lifestyle until I was in my thirties or something. Never giving a damn about anyone except myself. But then..." She took a deep breath and looked in Emily's eyes. "then I met you, and I didn't...I couldn't understand why I cared more for you than I did for myself. That's the moment I realized I was in love with you. Emily I know we're young and we both have our whole lives ahead of us. and if you meet someone you like more or that can treat you better than me, fine. But I'm going to treat you like a queen, for as long as you'll let me. I'm going to do everything in my power to make you as happy as you make me, and hope to God you never want to leave me. Because I love you."

The fearful tears that were in her eyes turned to happy tears listening to Samara express herself in a way she never had before. The fleeting moments where Emily couldn't decide if she loved her back had passed, she was sure.

"I love you too Sammy, and you make me so happy, I swear." Emily pushed Samara back down on the bed and softly caressed her lips with her own.

"Wait, don't you have a sleepover to get to? It's already 5 o'clock."

"They can wait a couple more hours, I'm not done playing with my gift."

X

Samara and Emily sat in the brand new Bentley in Paige's driveway. They were in a smoldering lip lock that neither wanted to break. After willing herself to pull away, Emily stared at her girlfriend. She looked different than she had just four hours ago after school. She looked more beautiful than Emily had ever seen her.

"I love you Emily."

"I love you too." They kissed.

"You sure you can't skip this thing so I could fuck you senseless all night?"

"Must you be so vulgar? And no, we've been doing this since we we're in our cribs."

"Yeah, yeah. If we keep kissing I'll have to kidnap you and your friends willl just have to be mad." Samara said with a scowl.

"Guess I better go then."

"Yeah, guess so." Neither moved. "I love you."

"I love you too. Bye Sammy."

"Bye baby. I love you."

"You sure like telling me that."

"I guess...I'm just making up for lost time. You're so special."

"You aren't bad yourself." Emily kissed Samara one last time before exiting the car.

X

"Okay girls, don't stay up too late, it's 10, so you guys can stay up another hour, then lights out, got it?" Nick McCullers asked his daughter and her two best friends.

"Got it." They all said together. Nick left the tree house and the girls continued their Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles marathon.

"Hey Paige could you pop some more popcorn?"

"I'll do it." Emily offered getting up.

"It's your birthday Em, I know, but you look so comfy, it's no big deal."

"Em, your phone is ringing." Mona told her.

"I'll get it in a minute."

"If you weren't at that stupid sleepover I'd be fucking your brains out. You were so good earlier." Mona read.

Emily was frozen at her place in front of the microwave. Did she just hear what she think she heard? She turned around to see a horrified look on mona's face. "Why are you reading my texts?"

"I wasn't, I just picked it up and saw the screen. You're having sex? With Sammy?!"

Paige and Emily shared a look. "Paige, you knew about this?" Mona looked shocked, disgusted, and hurt.

**SORRY TO DO THAT TO YOU...BUT...YEAH...SOOOOOO ANYWAY, IF YOU'RE GOOD, I'LL UPDATE TOMORROW. BUT ONLY IF YOU'RE GOOD.**

**COULD I JUST TAKE THIS MOMENT TO TELL YOU HOW MUCH I APPRECIATE THE FAVS, FOLLOWS, AND REVIEWS? **

**YOUR QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS KEEP ME GOING SO ASK AWAY...**


	18. Chapter 15

**HOW MANY DAYS IN A ROW IS THIS? MIGHT I SAY YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME...**

**IF SOME OF YOU ARE WONDERING WHY I'VE SKIPPED SEXY TIME WITH BOTH SAMARA/EMILY AND MEL/SPENCE, IT'S BECAUSE I'M SAVING THE GOOD STUFF FOR SPEMILY**

**ALSO, I WILL TRY TO HAVE MORE SPEMILY MOMENT AS WE ARE NEARING BOTH THEIR BREAKUPS, HOWEVER I STILL NEED TO ALTERNATE CHAPTERS BETWEEN THEIR LIVES BC IF I DON'T THEY WILL END UP BEING 9000 WORD CHAPTERS AND THAT'S JUST TOO LONG. BUT I'LL TRY...A LITTLE**

**KEEP YOUR COMMENTS AND QUESTIONS COMING, THEY INSPIRE ME, PLUS THEY CAUSE ME TO UPDATE FREQUENTLY, YOU LIKE UPDATES DON'T YOU?**

After a few hours, a glass of wine, and a slice of cake at Aria's, Spencer headed to her girlfriend's. When Spencer arrived at Meilani's house she was hit with the aroma of lavender and vanilla. There were a trail of rose petals on the entryway floor that she followed. She was lead down to the basement where her girlfriend stood holding a shiny bottle in her hand, along with two champagne glasses. There were two massage tables and two masseuses. On her right were two asian women sitting in chairs beside two pedicure tubs. Meilani wore nothing but a smile, a robe, and the S pendant that she never took off.

"There you are beautiful." Meilani poured champagne into the glasses, she handed one to Spencer.

"Oh my God Mel, thats a 40,000 dollar bottle of champagne." She recognized it from an article she read a few years ago. It was a seven year old bottle of Dom Perignon White Gold Jeroboam. The bottle itself was made entirely of white gold, hence the name. "When did you buy this?" She asked as she took the glass.

"Back in 2005. I thought I'd save it for a really special occasion."

"It's just my 23rd birthday, it's not even one of the big ones."

"It's a big deal to me, this is the first of many birthdays we will share, so I had to go all out. Now if you'll go in the bathroom and change into a robe, you don't have to keep any clothes on, they're professionals." Meilani looked back at the smiling masseuses.

The next two hours were spent with champagne sipping, massages, pedicures and manicures. Spencer had never felt so relaxed. She truly needed some relaxation after her run in with Maya, so this was the perfect birthday gift.

"Mel, you're the best girlfriend in the world, you know that?"

"I'm only second to you beautiful. I love you."

"I love you too Mel."

"Okay guys, thank you so much, you've all been wonderful." The workers nodded, smiled and began packing up their equipment. "Nani, go upstairs in the first guest room, there's another gift in there for you."

"Mel, this is already too much."

"I won't hear of it, now get."

Spencer walked into the first guest room at the top of the stairs to find one long stemmed pink rose on top of a rather large white box. She picked the rose up along with the note.

**OPEN ME**

Spencer couldn't believe her eyes when she pulled out a red strapless floor length satin gown. Underneath the dress were two more boxes. She opened them to find a marquise flower necklace in a white gold setting, dripping in white diamonds. The other box contained a matching bangle bracelet. There was another note.

**LOOK UNDER THE BED**

Under there was Christian Louboutin box. She figured Meilani had noticed it was her favorite shoe maker. She almost dropped the box upon opening it to find a pair of Daffodile Strass'. Spencer had always wanted a pair, but couldn't justify purchasing shoes covered in swarovski crystals that retailed for over 6000 dollars. It's not that she couldn't afford them, she received a substantial trust fund from her grandparents when she turned 21. She just couldn't bring herself to buy such expensive shoes when there were children starving in the world. She stared at them for a moment hoping they weren't going to fade away. When she realized this wasn't a dream she put all the items on and did her hair and makeup. Downstairs Meilani was in a strapless dress as well. Only hers was black and high on her thighs. Spencer thought her girlfriend looked so good, she'd rather eat her for dinner.

"Mel, you look gorgeous...wow."

"You're the gorgeous one. You find everything alright?"

"Yeah. Um...Mel, this is really all too..."

"Spencer, stop it. Let's go eat." They walked into the dining where the floor was covered with pink rose petals. There were two men standing by the table that had a few candles lit on it. One of the men was playing the violin while the other was holding the Dom Perignon they hadn't finished. They were both dressed in white tuxedo jackets with white shirts, black bow ties, and black tuxedo pants. "Is this okay?"

"Meilani, this is incredible."

"Would you like to slow dance while we wait on the food, it shouldn't be more than ten minutes."

"Lead the way." They danced while holding each other closely. Once their food was placed on the table, by a professional chef, they ate in silence, enjoying the classical music the violinist was playing. After two more bottles of slightly less expensive champagne, Meilani thanked the men and sent them on their way.

"So how'd I do?" Meilani asked as they walked out the dining room.

"You blew my mind. How the hell am I supposed to top this on your birthday?"

"Easy, just give me head for an hour straight, happy birthday to me."

"I've given you head for over two hours non stop, how will just one hour do?"

"Okay two hours."

"Mel, I'm serious, I have no idea what I could do that would be half as special. Thank you."

"You're so welcome. Listen beautiful, I don't need anything but you on my birthday, and on Christmas, and St. Patty's day, and groundhog day, Valentine's day, president's day." Spencer began to laugh as Meilani kissed her in the middle of her foyer. "I just need you, everyday of the year, forever if you want."

"I think I do want that..." Spencer trailed off not knowing what else to say, and not knowing if Meilani was about to propose. She wasn't sure if she wanted her to or not, but she knew she'd say yes.

"Good, now let's get you upstairs and out of that dress." She kissed her again. "I need to make love to the birthday girl."

**The next day at school**

Spencer let her students discuss with one another their thoughts on the third chapter of To kill and Mocking Bird. While most of the students participated, she noticed Emily hadn't said a word. Neither had Mona, and Mona had the biggest mouth of all her students. The both looked like they were on edge and Paige looked sympathetic. Now that she was paying attention to the three girls she knew were best friends, she saw that something was off. Spencer saw Emily try to give a note to Mona who brushed her hand away and made eye contact with Spencer. Mona tried to engage in the debate about the chapter at that point as Emily and Paige still sat quietly. Spencer was certain something had happened and it didn't look good. When class was dismissed she called after Emily.

"Hey Emily could you hang back for a sec."

"Wassup Spencer?" She felt so comfortable calling her by her first name.

"You don't really seem like yourself today, is everything alright? You know I'm always here to talk. Even if you need to stay a few extra minutes, I'll write you a late pass."

"Do you even know how awesome you are?"

"Yes. Yes I do." They shared a laugh before Emily's face got serious. She took her favorite seat right beside Spencer's desk.

"Well...I kinda told you I was gay yesterday, in the music room, remember?"

"I kinda remember that." She smiled at Emily.

"Okay so my best friend Paige has known for some time, but I've been super scared to tell my other best friend."

"Mona?"

"Right. So we were having our annual birthday sleepover and she looked at my phone screen. My girlfriend sent me...a...um...dirty text. When Mona saw it she freaked out."

"Oh, Em, I'm so sorry to hear that. What happened?"

_"So you're having sex with Sammy and you knew and I didn't, does that sum things up?" Mona asked looking back a forth between Emily and Paige._

_"It's not that simple, Emily wanted to tell you but she just wasn't comfortable yet."_

_"But she's oh so comfortable with you?"_

_"She needed someone, anyone to talk to. She figured I'd be the more understanding of us two."_

_"Wait, are you gay?" When Emily didn't respond, Mona raised her voice. "I asked you a question!"_

_"Yes." Emily responded weakly._

_"And you knew?"_

_"I think we've already established I was aware Mona." Paige said sarcastically._

_"So you're gay and you're screwing Sammy? And here you are at a sleepover with two girls, lucky you. How many times have we changed in front of you?"_

_"Emily's not like that! Just because she's gay doesn't mean she looks at us in that way. She's our best friend Mona, we're like sisters." Emily hadn't moved from her spot in front of the microwave. She was frozen and simply watched the heated exchange between her friends._

_"Some 'sister' she is, hiding this from me. And you! You hid it too!"_

_"It wasn't my business to tell! And judging by the way you're reacting now, she made the right decision not to tell you! Look," Paige started, calming down, "it's her life and her choices, and we should support her."_

_"She chose to be gay, how the hell am I to support that?!"_

_"Being gay isn't a fucking CHOICE!" Emily was so enraged she was shaking. Mona nor Paige moved and didn't know what to do. Emily had never cursed before and they both knew it. "Who the fuck would choose to be gay Mona?! Huh?! No one in their right mind!" She finally moved from her spot to stand in front of Mona. "It's something the whole world makes you feel ashamed of, it's something complete strangers hate you and judge you for. Being gay could mean being disowned by my family, by my friends! Being gay means I have to fight just to get the same rights every person should have. Being gay means if I'm with someone for 20 years and they get sick, I can't even know what's going on at the hospital. Who would chose this life? It's ten times harder because of people like you! People who think it isn't 'normal'. I prayed to God EVERY night that he would take these feelings away from me, and he never did. I can't help that I'm gay, I can't help that I love Sammy. She's not just someone I'm screwing, she's my girlfriend and I love her! I'm not some alien that fell out of the sky Mona, I'm still Emily, I'm still your best friend."_

_"Best friends don't lie and keep secrets from one another Em. If I was really your friend I wouldn't have found out by glancing at your phone." Mona started to get her things together._

_"Where are you going it's Emily's birthday."_

_"So?" Mona put her coat and sneakers on and threw her backpack over one shoulder._

_"Mona," Emily was near tears. "Please, you can't tell anyone. I haven't told my parents yet and..."_

_"And you should be more careful where you leave your phone."_

"Then she walked out the door and hasn't talked to me since. I just really hope she doesn't tell anyone."

"Wow Emily, that really sucks."

"I thought you'd have something a little more wise to say, or at least more articulate, being a English teacher and what not."

"Sometimes things just suck, and it's okay to say that. What else can I say besides she's really being a dick about the matter." Emily stared at Spencer, not quite sure if she heard her correctly. "I'm sorry. It's just that...well you know that I'm gay too and I had a rough time with my family. It always gets under my skin when people are unaccepting of the way other's live their lives. You don't have to like what I do, but everyone is owed respect. I think it's messed up that you all have been friends your entire lives and now all of a sudden she acts like you're someone she doesn't know? Just because you're gay? That's messed up, and it's a dick move, so there I said it."

"You're totally right Spencer, she is kind of being a dick about the whole thing."

"Emily, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Why haven't you told your parents?"

"I'm so not ready for that talk. My mom is a devout Catholic and my dad isn't super religious but he's a military man. They have a code of honor they live by and I highly doubt he finds homosexaulity honorable."

"Geez Em, you sure got the short end of the stick huh? I thought my parents were bad. I mean not bad, just as far as coming out to them goes, you're going to have a way tougher time than I did."

"Tell me about it." Emily grumbled.

"You can't hide who you are forever. I know it's super scary to tell people, but I promise, if you show that you're comfortable in your own skin, other people have no choice but to accept. And you never know, they may become okay with it too."

**DAMN, MUST BE NICE HAVING A GIRLFRIEND WHO'S A FLITHY RICH HUH? MEL IS THE BEST GIRLFRIEND IN THE WORLD RIGHT? I'LL BE SAD WHEN THEY END...**

**WONDER WHAT WILL HAPPEN BETWEEN EM AND MONA...**

**THOUGHTS?**


	19. Chapter 16

Samara watched with worry as Emily paced back and forth in front of her bed. It had been a month since Emily's birthday disaster and Mona still wasn't speaking to either of her best friends. Not to mention all the nasty remarks that Mona would spew when she saw either Paige or Emily within ear shot. Unfortunately for Mona, Samara didn't put up with anyone hurting her girlfriend. So after about two weeks of her indirect insults, Samara threatened Mona. For the life of Emily, she couldn't get her girlfriend to tell her what she had said, but the insults stopped. In fact, she stopped looking in Emily's direction all together. The stress of not knowing whether Mona would spill the beans about her sexuality was weighing heavily on Emily. But a week went by, then two, then four and she figured Mona wouldn't tell. However, she couldn't help but feel despair over essentially losing Mona because of her sexuality. Not only that, but she knew eventually one of their parents would ask what's going on, and she had no clue how to navigate that. Although she was good at hiding things, she was a terrible liar, and when her mom does ask, she had no clue what to say. The knock on Samara's bedroom door halted her stride.

"What?" Samara asked her live in nanny, who wasn't much of a care giver at all. She served less purpose than a pocket with a hole in it.

"I'm going out, here." She handed Samara a twenty. "If you get hungry."

"Thanks, see you." Samara closed and locked her door and went back to her earlier position on her bed. She watched as Emily resumed her pacing. "Baby, please."

"I just don't know what to do Sammy. This is literally my worse nightmare coming true."

"She won't tell your parents, or _anyone_ for that matter, if she knows what's good for her."

Emily stopped and turned to face Samara. "Sammy, imma ask one last time, what did you say to her?"

"And I'm going to tell you one last time, I'm not telling you! It's none of your business, that was between she and I." She rose from the bed when she saw her words and tone had saddened her girlfriend even more. "I'm sorry, I'm just not going to tell you, so stop asking. Please."

"It's probably why she won't even consider talking to me now."

"Oh so this is my fault? How many times do I have to apologize for sending MY girlfriend a text. And for defending her, when her _friend _is being an ass and hurting her feelings? I'm such a horrible fucking person huh?"

"No Sammy, baby. I didn't mean..." She wrapped her arms around Samara's neck. "I don't mean to blame you. This whole situation is just too much. I'm so...stressed."

"Let me relieve you of some of that _stress_." Samara suggested seductively.

"As much as I would love that, you have to take me home soon."

"Baby, could you just think about telling your parents?" It wasn't the first time Samara had asked the question and she was sure it wouldn't be her last. She was very comfortable in her skin and wished she didn't have to hide their relationship, and her patience was waning.

"I...I can't, I'm not ready."

"I'm sure it will feel like a ton of bricks has just be lifted off your chest. It's terrible being in the closet. It's lonely and scary, always thinking someone is going to find you out. Closets are for clothes, not people Emily."

Samara always surprised Emily when she spoke so profoundly and movingly. Her words were almost enough to cause her to march home that instant and tell her mother she was in love, with a girl. With the girl her mother had grown very fond of. Emily came home from Paige's on numerous occasions and her girlfriend was with her mother. Samara knew Pam Field's work schedule better than Emily did. Sometimes Samara would come over to the house just to chat with Pam while Emily was having some of her "me time".Then she'd go upstairs, kiss Emily goodbye and go home. Samara would cook with Pam, and shop with her too, they truly were friends. Emily knew the news of her sexuality would be hurtful but the fact that she's in a relationship with the young lady her mom adored, would be devastating. Samara was scared too, she loved Pam dearly. She couldn't believe Pam had opened her home and heart to her like she had. Pam was more of a mother to Samara than her own. In the last seven months Pam had treated her with more love and kindness than she had experienced her whole sixteen years. She was grateful to have Emily, and for her to have brought Pam into her life. They both knew Pam felt the same way. She was terrified to upset Pam, but she wanted her to know she was in love with her daughter.

"Emily listen to me, we can't keep going on like this. We've officially been together what, four months now? I've been patient but..."

"And you're going to continue being patient."

"You think this is okay, you think I'll just wait around?" Samara couldn't control her anger, or her voice. "I won't be your dirty little secret forever!"

"I'm not going to be pressured into doing something I'm not ready for Samara!" Emily grabbed her coat and left.

XXX

Enough was enough. Emily had never sneaked out of her house before, it was a school night, but she didn't care. She knew she had to take matters into her own hands. Her mom was home but sleep after working two doubles back to back at the hospital. Emily knew she was out like a light and wouldn't hear the front door opening. She ran as fast as her legs would carry her to the Vanderwaal's. She climbed up the tree closest to the house and swung her self off a branch to land on the side of their roof. She walked carefully over to Mona's window and hung upside down to knock. Mona was startled by the sudden noise, but quickly walked over to her window to open it. Emily turned herself around to slid off the roof and safely into her former best friend's room. Mona shut the window and waited for Emily to speak.

"Mona, I can't do this anymore." The tears started before she got her name out of her mouth. Mona looked away, clearly bothered by Emily's crying. "You're my best friend, I love you with all my heart. No one could ever take you or Paige's place. You have been so cruel to me, yet here I am, begging for _your _forgiveness, even though I don't even know why you hate me so much all of a sudden. But I'm here anyway, climbing trees just to steal a moment to talk to you. So please, just talk to me. If you hate me because I'm...gay, then just say it and I'll never bother you again."

"You're an idiot. I don't care that you're gay." Mona spat.

"Okay, so what is it? Mona please." Emily cried a little harder.

Mona bit back her own tears before she spoke again. "I don't hate you, I'm mad as hell you thought I would. I'm mad you went to Paige instead of me. I'm mad that after Paige knew for however many months, you still didn't tell me. I'm mad because you've had a girlfriend for however long and I had no clue. I'm mad that Paige never urged you to tell me nor ever hinted that you and I needed to talk. I'm mad that I was the last to know. I'm mad that you call me your "best friend" and tell me you "love me with all your heart" and kept something like this from me. I devastated that you didn't trust me." She crossed her arms in front of her chest.

"Mona, you will _never_ know how sorry I am I didn't trust you. I could say sorry for a million years and it still wouldn't amount to how truly sorry I am. I was scared. I need you to put yourself in my shoes, if only for a minute. No one knows I'm gay, no one knows Samara and I are in love. I'm terrified of people knowing..."

"I'm not people!"

"No...you aren't. You are one of the most special human beings in my life. In the world Mona." Emily stepped just in front of her and uncrossed Mona's arms. She cupped her cheeks. "Mona I love you dearly and I need you to know I'm sorry, but I also need you to take a minute to try and understand. Stop looking at _what _I did and take a moment to look at _why _I did what I did. It wasn't to hurt you. It was to protect myself. People are evil out there, and hateful, come on Mona, we live in a small town. Would you be able to live with yourself if you outed me and I got hurt. Or what about school, how will you feel once people do find out and I'm ostracized, will you still be my friend? Will you still love me?" Emily let her hands fall from Mona's face and placed her face in them. She began to sob at just the thought of being hated by the people she loved most. Mona took her by the arm and lead her to sit on her bed. She held her tight until Emily stopped crying, which was more than an hour.

"Okay...okay, I get it. I'm a complete bitch."

"Yeah, you were."

"You shouldn't be asking for my forgiveness, I should be asking for yours. I love you Em, and I've missed you terribly. I'm fine with you and Sammy okay?"

"You are?"

"Yes. As long as you make sure she doesn't hurt me."

"Speaking of that, what did my baby say to you?"

"Baby? More like crazed monster. Um, I can't tell you what she said or else she'll murder me."

"Come on...I won't tell, promise."

"I can't Em, just know this, there is absolutely _nothing_ that girl wouldn't do for you. She loves you more than life itself and trust me, she's willing to risk _anything _to keep you safe and happy."

"She said all that?"

"She didn't have to." Mona got up and went for her phone.

"Who ya calling?"

Mona looked at Emily lovingly, but also with sadness. "Paige." She needed to apologize profusely to her other best friend.

XXX

March was a rough month for Spencer and there was only one person to blame. Maya. Her texts were non stop and she refused to back down or go away. Everyday Spencer came to class with a new gift waiting for her. Some of the things Maya left for her made Spencer's heart flutter, and she hated herself for it. But no one, besides Aria, knew Spencer better than Maya did. So, she knew the things that would get to Spencer. She knew how to make her feel nostalgic and remember the old times, the good times, the great times. Worse of all, Maya knew how to re-enter her ex's life and make her miss her. Spencer hated herself even more. Meilani was perfect, or as close to perfection as she could get. Spencer knew she had finally found what she's been looking for her entire life. But Maya was making it almost impossible to enjoy, what's more is, she was clouding Spencer's judgment, and her thoughts. March came and went and Spencer was glad it was April. She decided not to tell anyone about Maya because she'd be leaving soon. She wasn't completely sure when, but she knew sometime this month.

"Hey Bugg."

"I was wondering when you'd show up again." Spencer hadn't seen her ex since her birthday, but her gifts and flowers never stopped, not even for one day. On Mondays there would be three tokens of affection waiting for her, making up for the weekend.

"I was just waiting for the right moment. You look so good Bugg."

"Maya Ann St. Germain, if you do not stop calling me that!" Spencer didn't need to finish her thought.

"Sorry, sorry. Geez woman. Can we talk? Please?" Maya asked not waiting for an answer, taking a seat.

"What?"

"I know I hurt you." She looked at her hands in her lap, fighting back tears. "Bugg, uh Spencer, you have no idea the amount of regret I'm consumed with everyday. Spence, I never cheated on you." She said quietly, still looking at her hands.

"What?" Now Spencer had to battle her own tears. "What are you talking about Maya?" She asked with a shaky voice.

Maya finally looked at Spencer, having loss the war with the water in her eyes. "I never cheated, I just told you I did. I haven't been with anyone else since the day I met you. I haven't even so much as looked at another girl. But I knew that I had to make you hate me in order to make you stay away."

"Why...why the hell did you even want me to stay away?"

"Because I was scared. My manager and agent scared the fuck out of me with all that "You can't be out" shit. And I thought they were right. So..."

"So what Maya?!" Spencer yelled.

"So I knew how fucked up it would be to ask you to hide in the closet with me. Instead of telling you all of this, I lied to you. I figured if I told you the truth you'd stay, and the bottom line is, I thought you could do better than me. I knew it would be selfish of me to let you stay, so I lied." Maya repeated. "It was my dream Bugg, I'd dreamed my whole life of growing up and being a successful actress, I couldn't give it up. Not even for the love of my life, so I pushed you away hoping you'd find someone who you could be with, that didn't have to hide."

Spencer stood up, she looked at the clock, she still had forty minutes until her next class. She knew she would need every second to absorb what she'd just been told and try to pull herself together. "Get out."

"Bugg please." Maya said standing too.

"Get out!" She screamed at the top of her lungs.

"I love you."

Spencer had lost the war too. Both she and Maya were close to sobbing. "You love me huh? Fuck you!" Maya had never heard Spencer curse, not once. She shoved Maya. "How could you do that to me? And what about now? How can you just come back after more than three years telling me the truth, and that you love me? Huh? I'm talking to you!" She said when Maya didn't answer. She shoved her again. "Aren't you scared to be out, don't you think it'll ruin your _dream_?" She asked sarcastically.

"I don't care. I can't live without you anymore. I'm willing to risk whatever may happen to my career because I'm in love with you. I _won't_ go on living without you anymore Bugg. I just won't. Please just...I'm sorry." She moved closer, Spencer shook her head, unable to form words. "Bugg please." She was right in Spencer's face now. "Bugg..." Her sentence was interrupted by Spencer's hand slapping her face.

"Fuck you." Spencer said weakly as tears continued to spill from her eyes.

"Bugg." Maya wasn't phased by the slap, she just moved closer to the love of her life. "Bugg please, I love you." Her lips were inches apart from Spencer's and she was glad her ex didn't move. Just as she leaned in, Spencer's door opened.

"WHAT...THE...FUCK?! You must want to die!" Before Maya could blink, she was on the floor.


	20. Chapter 17

**LACK OF FEEDBACK MAKES HUGZFORFREE A SAD WRITER**

**BUT HERE'S ANOTHER CHAPTER ANYWAY...**

It all happened so fast. Before Spencer knew what was going on, Maya was on the floor being punch in the face repeatedly. It took far too long for Spencer to register what was going on. Once her brain started to work again, she grabbed her tiny friend by the waist finally pulling her off.

"Aria, what the hell?!" She pushed Aria halfway across the room. Spencer rushed to Maya's side. Maya held her head back as blood was spilling out of her lip and nose. Spencer opened a drawer in her desk to pull out some paper towels. She ripped a generous amount off then threw the roll on the floor, pressing the towels to Maya's face. "Oh my God Maya, are you okay? Jesus, keep you head back and apply pressure." She turned back to Aria. "What is wrong with you?!"

"What's wrong with me? What the fuck is wrong with her, showing up here!" Aria charged towards Maya again but Spencer stepped in her way. She roughly grabbed Aria by her wrists and ushered her towards the door. "No, let me the fuck go! How dare you come here! You fucking bitch, let me the fuck go Spencer!"

"No, you need to calm down!"

"I'm not calming shit the fuck down! Let me go, imma fuck her up!"

"Aria! Stop it please!"

"The fuck?" Aria stopped struggling to get away from Spencer and looked at her with disgust. "You defending that lying cheating bitch? How long has this been going on, you fucking around behind Meilani's back with this piece of shit? What the fuck is wrong with you?! You fucking idiot!" Aria screamed at Spencer.

"What's going on in here?"

"Oh God, Vice Principal Long, I'm so sorry."

"Don't be sorry Ms. Hastings, just tell me what is this, is she alright?"

"Not if I have something to say about it. What's going on is that I'm about to kill this bitch!" Aria hollered with no regard for her superior.

"Vice Principal Long, I can explain, she's an old friend of mine." Spencer gestured to the injured Maya. "Aria and I have been friends my whole life and these two don't get along. They both showed up to my classroom unexpectedly and got into it, I'm so sorry for the commotion."

"I see. You ought to go to the nurse to get that looked at. Ms. Hastings I trust you'll see her to it?"

"Yes sir."

"Ms. Montgomery, come with me please." Aria didn't move, she just sent death stares at the bleeding Maya.

"Aria, please." Spencer begged.

"Ms. Montgomery?"

She finally moved, walking out the class backwards, keeping her eyes on Maya. "This ain't over you filthy bitch!" She stressed the word bitch.

"Aria!" Spencer was terrified her best friend was about to get fired.

"Don't let me see you again."

"That's enough Ms. Montgomery, let's go."

"If I see you outside these walls, I SWEAR TO GOD!" She left the room with her boss in tow.

X

"There, you should be all better now." The nurse said beaming at Maya. She was so excited Maya was in her office, she asked for an autograph before looking at her injuries. Maya just chuckled and signed away. "I'll be right back."

"You ever get used to that?" Spencer asked when the door closed behind the nurse. "Not being treated like a human being anymore."

"Naw, I'll never get used to this shit. The other day I'm buying tampons at Wal-Mart and someone asks for a picture. I'm thinking to myself, damn I can't even buy fucking tampons in peace?" She and Spencer both laughed.

"I'm really sorry about Aria. If someone hurts someone she loves..."

"I know. Hey, you know I could have beat her little ass right?"

Spencer smiled knowingly, Maya had let Aria hit her in the face multiple times, only raising her arm to ward off the punches. "Yes I know."

"I didn't want you to be mad at me Bugg. I love you. I'm tired of you hating me. I don't want us to spend another second mad at each other, ever again."

"Maya..." She sighed.

"Baby please...no one could ever be me. And I don't need to share my bed with anyone else to know no one will ever be you. Bugg please. I'll do anything."

"How do I know what you were telling me is the truth? How don't I know you're just acting? You _are_ a really good actress."

Maya looked away from Spencer, pain clear on her face. She turned back around with a tear sliding down her cheek. "I can't believe you just said that to me. I can't just turn it on like a light switch. I..." She shook her head.

"Maya, I'm sorry."

"Are you considering it?"

"Huh?"

"Us? Just think about it. I'll give you all the time you need."

X

The rest of the day passed in a blur, Spencer needed to talk to Meilani, but there was another dark-haired woman she needed to speak to first. Spencer hadn't seen Aria after the incident. When she caught up with the Vice Principal, he informed her he had sent the woman home for the rest of the day to cool off. But not before receiving some stern warnings about her behavior and language. He even made a joke about Maya St. Germain turning up missing and knowing who did it, which even Spencer had to laugh at. She stood outside the door she had freely walked in so many times before, and knocked.

"What the fuck do you want?!" Aria was just as loud as when she say Maya earlier. Spencer's heart began to ache, Aria and she had never gotten into a real argument before. Nor had she ever looked at Spencer the way she was now. Aria barely had the door open.

"Could I please come in munchkin? Please?"

"I'm not your fucking munchkin! Go fuck yourself!" She slammed the door in Spencer's face. She immediately burst into tears and turned around. She tried to walk but her legs gave out and she slid to the ground. With her back against Aria's door, she sobbed. Countless moments later she fell back on the floor to look up at Aria who had finally opened the door. Aria tossed some balled up tissue in Spencer's face and walked away. She blew her nose and wiped her eyes, stood up, closed the door and sat next to the person who meant the world to her. No one could come before Aria in her heart, not even for a second.

"I'm still your munchkin." Aria said, barely audible.

"Huh?"

"I said I'm still your munchkin! Damn!"

"Can I explain what's going on now munchkin?" Aria said noting. Did nothing. Spencer knew she would be in more trouble with her best friend since it was the middle of April and Maya had shown up on her birthday. She explained to Aria in detail everything that had occurred in the past month. The gifts, the flowers, the late night texts about their past that made Spencer swoon. She left nothing out. Every second since March fourteenth, that she could think of , Aria now knew. Spencer wanted to leave out how she was feeling, but knew she'd be asked and she couldn't lie to Aria, not anymore. It wasn't exactly a lie, but she had kept something from her, and that was a first. Aria grimaced during most of Spencer's words, in fact she looked sick to her stomach, but she listened, and waited patiently for Spencer to finish. She tolerated hearing Maya's name over and over. And she tolerated all the emotions Spencer was explaining that made her want to strangle her best friend. Without any ambiguity, Spencer let Aria know she never cheated on Meilani. The face Aria made told her she better explain what she had walked in on at school. Would she have let her Maya kiss her? If she was being honest with Aria and herself, the answer was yes. After she shoved Maya twice and then slapped her, she had no more fight left in her. What's more is, she wanted, needed to feel those lips again. She needed to make sure there was nothing else left there, it was the only way she could move on with Meilani. If she felt something, then she didn't exactly know what to do, if she felt nothing she knew she could finally move forward and leave Maya in the past. Most importantly, she would never have any doubts about her relationship with Meilani.

Aria seemed to take all this information in stride. There were no more curse words hurled around, no more shouting, just conversation among friends. After Aria had completely calmed herself from the day's excitement, she apologized amply, which Spencer readily accepted. Them being at each other's throats was not something that had ever happened, and they promised one another it would never happen again. Not before Aria made Spencer promise to never keep anything from her, no matter how she thought she might react. Spencer agreed.

"Are you going to think about it?"

"I think I have to. I wish to God I knew this back then. I've been kicking myself for not guessing something was off. Her eyes, they were sad but, not "I cheated on you" sad. More like "I wish I didn't have to do this" sad. But I was so distracted I didn't notice. She must have been dying inside all this time. And to have all that fame and money with no one to share it with. Knowing she wanted to share it with me. Now I know she sacrificed us, so that I wouldn't be miserable..."

"That doesn't really change anything Spencer." She knew she was right, so she had nothing to say. "What are you going to do about Meilani?"

"I'm going to kiss her, I need to see how it feels. If it still feels the same then maybe I'm not affected by Maya like I think I might be. If it doesn't then I'm going to go to Philly to talk to Maya, and go from there."

"That's about the stupidest shit I've ever heard. But, you _do_ need to resolve this, and the sooner the better. If that's the only method you can think of then do it."

"If I got back with Maya?"

"I wouldn't even come to your wedding." Aria loved Spencer in a way that wasn't, by any means, describable. She didn't even really understand it sometimes, but she would never, not even for a split second, support a reunion with the actress. That was fair and Spencer knew it. So she went off on her mission.

X

When Meilani got home she saw that Spencer had made use of the key she had given her ages ago. Spencer leapt into her girlfriend's arms and kissed her with purpose. She didn't even say hello, she didn't even let Meilani get her jacket off or put her keys down. Meilani didn't mind, she loved the woman, she craved the woman, her soul mate. Since she figured Spencer was in a rush, she started taking off her clothes right where she stood. Spencer immediately ripped Meilani's clothes off too, then backed her up into the library which was a few feet from the foyer. Also the closest room. Still not wanting to waste time, Spencer lowered herself on the floor in the doorway, as Meilani quickly followed, laying on top of her naked body, completely bare too. Spencer's eyes went to the massive collection of books right above her when Meilani moved to suck on her neck. They still hadn't said one word to each other and Spencer hoped Meilani didn't ask her anything.

Spencer moaned loudly when she felt fingers fill her. It seemed as though Meilani was in her head and knew exactly what she wanted and how she wanted it. She felt so good, so perfect, like their bodies were made for each other. Meilani's mouth left Spencer's neck and began to aggressively suck on her nipple. Spencer's muscles contracted just then. The explosion of pleasure could have been heard miles away. Meilani moved her mouth again, she wanted to lick Spencer clean. She always did, and it always caused Spencer to climax again.

Her hands found their way in Meilani's hair tugging to pull her up. Meilani thought maybe Spencer wanted to kiss, but found herself being moved upwards until she was hovering over Spencer's face. She wasted no time tasting Meilani, she couldn't get enough of her taste. It was more than intoxicating, it was addictive. Spencer was a slave to everything that was Meilani, particularly her taste. She licked up and down as Meilani moved her hips in rhythm. She stuck her tongue inside and Meilani started to ride it. She was at the perfect angle to go deep, and she did. Meilani was whimpering and struggling to keep her balance, so Spencer put one hand on her lower back and reached the other around her thigh. She started to stimulate her clit while holding her up, her tongue showing no mercy. With her hand on her back she was able to push Meilani down harder and faster as her tongue jetted in and out, her hand rubbing quick circles. Before long Meilani was screaming in Hawaiian along with Spencer's name. She came undone on top of Spencer in a manner she'd never before. She fell down beside her girlfriend and Spencer wiped her face as best she could. Spencer eventually turned to face Meilani who was curled up, facing away, clutching her center, still whimpering.

"You okay?" Spencer tried to touch her but she shifted so she wouldn't.

"Don't touch me." Was Meilani's breathy response. Spencer watched her girlfriend for an endless amount of time. She wanted to go clean up, but she had to make sure Meilani was alright. Finally she turned around.

"Fuck me."

"I already did that. You okay?"

"Better than that nani."

"Have you ever..."

"Squirted before? No. Never. That was...my God, how did you do that to me?"

Spencer smiled arrogantly. "I have no idea, sometimes things just happen in the throes of passion."

"You might wanna clean yourself off beautiful." Spencer smiled as she watched Meilani rise above her wearing nothing but the chain she got her for Christmas. In that moment, Spencer forgot all about Maya. There was only Meilani, there could only be Meilani...forever.

X

Since their fight, Emily hadn't talked to Samara. It happened on a Thursday and Samara skipped school on Friday because Emily texted her not to pick her up. She was happy that things were back to normal with her two best friends, but very unhappy with her girlfriend. It was Sunday and she looked at her phone, which she'd ignored all day, to see twenty new texts and eight missed calls, all from Samara. That was basically her weekend, ignoring her girlfriend. She wasn't sure what to say so she said nothing.

She was home alone after church, her mom had to run some errands, so she sat in her living room and watched TV. Until her doorbell interrupted her. Of course it was Samara, she was surprised it had taken her this long to show up at her door. What was more surprising was her appearance. Samara always dressed impeccably wearing the most expensive designers money can by. Emily was sure that her tee-shirt collection cost more than her entire wardrobe. But Samara didn't look like her normal flawless self, she looked torn down. She'd put no effort into her hair or what she wore. She had on a simple hoody and track pants, and her mane disheveled. That wasn't what was alarming to Emily, it was her face. Her eyes were dark and puffy and there was a steady stream of tears cascading down her cheeks.

"This is so fucked up Emily! Just...just put me out of my misery already okay. Just...would you just tell me we're done to my face! At least I won't be sitting around hoping. This is exactly why I never wanted a girlfriend! I knew you'd break my heart!" Emily grabbed Samara so she would stop shouting on her front porch, she didn't need the neighbors telling her mom. She shut the door after she pulled her in. "Just..." The rest of what she was going to say dissolved behind her cries and Emily had never been so hurt in her life. She just wanted to teach her a lesson, she never meant for her to think they were over.

"Sammy, I'm so sorry." She hugged her and rubbed her back until she soothed her and her crying let up. "Baby look at me, we're not done."

"We're not?" They pulled back a little.

"No, I'm so sorry I made you think that."

"But...we had that fight and you left and you haven't talked to me since, it sure feels like you're done with me."

"Sammy every couple fights, it doesn't automatically mean breakup."

"We never fought like that before, and then...you left."

"I know, I'll never do that again okay? No matter how mad I get. I'll stay and we'll yell and then makeup."

"You swear?" Samara sounded like a wounded child.

"I swear baby. I love you so much. I'm not even mad anymore." She held Samara a little tighter, but still maintained eye contact.

"I'm sorry you felt like I was pushing you. It's just that I wish I could scream from the mountaintop you're mine. It's so difficult hiding our relationship when all I wanna do is give you all the love and affection you deserve no matter who's watching, it's really tough."

"I know...it's tough on me too. When I'm ready, we'll go find that mountaintop, together." Samara finally smiled and Emily finally breathed. "I know what will make you feel better, and before you ask, no it's not sex. But we will do that after."

"Okay, after what?"

"Wanna smoke?"

"You never have to ask me that, the answer will always be yes. So smoke, then sex?"

"Smoke, then sex." Emily confirmed. "Do you have any with you?"

"Shit, no. We can go to Jenna's place, Garret should be there, if not we'll just get some out his stash."

"Let's go." Samara turned to open the door but was stopped by Emily. "Hey, I don't ever wanna see tears on that beautiful face of yours again." She gave her a long loving kiss before heading out.

X

They were at Jenna's for a half hour before her boyfriend Garrett showed. He had more weed than Emily thought four people should consume.

"How much you want?"

"You really gonna make me pay?" Samara joked.

"We go through this every time blondie."

"I'm just messing with you Garrett, relax. Shit, I left my money in the car."

"I'll get it for you."

"You sure?"

"No problem." Samara handed Emily her car keys and she left out, only to bump into someone the second she walked out into the hall. "Oh sorry."

"Emily, what the hell are you doing coming out of Jenna Marshall's apartment?"

"What are you doing here?"

"I live right there."

"Oh."

"Answer me."

"She's my girlfriend's cousin."

"Your girlfriend is Samara Cook?"

"Why did you just say that like I said I'm dating Lucifer?"

"Close to it."

"Hey."

"I'm sorry Em, she's just a little...old for you."

Emily chuckled. "She's only a year older than me."

"She behaves much older than that." They were quiet for a moment. "I know what Jenna and Garrett do in that apartment, hell I used to do it with them.

"Oh my God are you serious?"

"Yeah, this past summer. But we had to stop, teachers get random drug tests." Spencer paused. "Look I've got nothing against you smoking weed, I think weed is awesome, but Garrett, he's into more than just weed Em."

"I know, but he would never bring that stuff here."

"Just please be careful okay?"

"I will."

"I'm not just talking about Garrett Emily. Samara isn't the greatest kid, I know you like her." Spencer said quickly when she noticed Emily's discomfort, "but just be careful okay? I don't want to see you get hurt."

"Okay Spencer, thanks for looking out for me."

"Always, and hey, don't tell the other students where I live. I'd never be able to get rid of you guys then. But if you need anything and you're around, you can always knock on my door." She winked then disappeared into her apartment.

X

"Alright guys settle down. I know everyone is a bit restless with only two days of school left." She paused. "I thought I would give you guys a project, just to make your last days a little more interesting." Almost everyone groaned. "Hey shut it. I'm the teacher and this is my classroom and I do what I want. So the assignment is...for you to tell me what you think about the movie I'm about to show you." The class went from silence to soft cheers.

"You have to be the most awesome person ever in the history of life." Sean loved Ms. Hastings, and although he was excited for summer break, her was broken up about not seeing her for three months. As were most of her students.

"Hmmm...I think Jesus probably has me beat, but other than that, I'd have to agree." She went to her closet to pull out her TV and stand, she rolled it to the front of the class and told them their choices. Almost everyone wanted to watch the Dark Knight, so she popped it in. "So can I trust all of you while I step out for a bit? If I come back and hear or see something I don't like I'll make all of your lives a living hell next year. Em, you'll be my eyes?" She smiled and nodded. "Sean, you'll be my ears?" He gave her a thumbs up. "Ryan you'll behave?" They all laughed at the class clown.

Spencer walked into Aria classroom, they were having a pizza party and she was invited. Her party would be on the last day. Aria handed her a couple of slices and they sat at her desk.

"Aria, where did you get pizza at 8 in the morning."

"Don't ask questions son." Spencer laughed at her very silly best friend. "Has she contacted you?" Aria asked about Maya about once every ten days. Ever since Spencer called Maya to tell her she was happily in love and wouldn't be taking her back, she hadn't heard a peep from her.

"Nope. I keep telling you she won't."

"That's what I thought the first time." Spencer shook her head and enjoyed her inappropriate breakfast.

**HEY, SO TALK TO ME...**

**AND PREPARE FOR A TIME JUMP, A LARGE ONE. WE'RE VERY CLOSE TO THE 1ST BREAKUP.**

**AN: YOU KNOW YOU HAVE JUST GOTTEN SOME REALLY GOOD SEX WHEN YOU SAY "DON'T TOUCH ME" LOL...SPENCE REALLY WENT IN...**

**WHAT Y'ALL THINK, FEEL ETC.?**


	21. Chapter 18

**THIS CHAPTER IS BASICALLY ALL DIALOGUE. I'M NOT THRILLED WITH THIS CHAPTER IN THE SLIGHTEST. BE KIND. OR NOT. WHATEVER. I'LL TRY TO DO BETTER...**

AMR 7/2/13 . chapter 20

Did you happen to get Mel's name from Janel Parrish's middle name? :P I love the story!

**YES that is exactly where I got the name from and how I decided she would be Hawaiian! : )**

Out of nowhere Aria paused the movie she and Spencer were watching. They just got back from their yearly vacation in Dubai and were jet lagged, so they decided to relax on Aria's couch with a movie with popcorn. Spencer was sitting up while Aria was laying down with her legs laying on Spencer. Aria stared at the ceiling while Spencer waited to hear what she had to say. She knew there was something going on, she hadn't been herself in the past couple of weeks. She thought maybe she was upset that she hadn't seen Ezra since before they went to Dubai, and he was visiting his family in Pittsburgh. She wouldn't see him again until the end of July. Instead of asking what was wrong Spencer waited until Aria was ready to talk, she wasn't the type of person you ask "what's wrong" to. She's the type to clam up and hold everything inside. With Spencer knowing this, she always let Aria come to her when she was ready to talk, she guessed this was that moment.

"I cheated on Ezra." Spencer wasn't surprised in the least bit. Aria had never been in a relationship and she has been seeing Ezra just as long as she's been seeing Meilani, that makes ten months. She knew Aria wasn't keen on being exclusive with one guy, but there was something different about this one, something that had made her fall in love. However, being in an exclusive, monogamous relationship was less than ideal for Aria. Spencer knew her best friend, better than anyone else. She was surprised it had taken this long for Aria to stray.

"When?"

"The week before we left for Dubai."

"With who?"

"I don't wanna say."

"Why did you cheat?" She already knew the answer, but asked anyway.

"I've never done this relationship shit Spency, it's so weird to me. Not only that, we say we love each other. It's...creepy."

"Yeah...sooooo creepy."

"Shut up! It is to me."

"How did this happen?"

"Uh...she called me up, said she was in New York for work and wanted to see me."

"The Dominican?"

"The Dominican." Aria confirmed. "She said we could meet in Philly and go to Sole Food. So we went and ate and, well, you know Sole Food is at the bottom of the Lowes Hotel, so we went to the hotel bar." Aria paused, recalling the night. "After I'm not sure how many drinks, she said we should go up to the highest suite with a bottle of wine and enjoy the view. She got the penthouse suite on the 36th floor and we took some chairs and faced them towards the window." Aria still hadn't removed her eyes from the ceiling, but Spencer's eyes were fixed on her clearly sad best friend. She wanted to help, but she didn't know how, except to listen. "We were reminiscing about old times and she brought up Cory, said she ran into him at one of his games. He plays for the Knicks now, did you know that?"

"Yeah, I knew. He's not half bad."

"Yeah well, she said they got into a pissing match over me. They were joking but she always wondered if I stopped fucking her because he was better in bed."

"What did you tell her."

"The truth. My three-month rule and...that no one on earth was better in bed than her." Spencer nodded in thought. "So she got up and sat on my lap, then she kissed me."

"And you didn't try to stop her?"

"She was looking good as shit Spencer. I mean, I was wet as hell all through dinner. She's even sexier if that's possible."

"Okay..." Spencer dragged out the word. "Then what happened?"

"She pulled away to look at me, she said she missed my lips...both sets. I was a goner after that. She licked me clean right in that chair. Then we moved to the floor, then the couch, then the counter, then the bed. We rested for a little after round four then we went back at it. We fell asleep, when we woke up we fucked again, then we fucked in the shower. I didn't even think about Ezra. Not once." Aria started to tear up and Spencer rubbed her leg. "Not once the whole time I was fucking her or she was fucking me, did he once enter my mind. It wasn't until I dropped her off at 30th St station that I thought "Holy fuck, I have a boyfriend". I can't just fuck who I want when I want any more and that's unnerving. But...I love him, which is even more disturbing. But the worse of it all...I feel so fucking guilty. Never in my life have I _ever_ felt guilty about a fuck, especially a good a fuck as she is. I can't even describe it...it's like my whole chest is sinking in. So I guess my relationship is over now."

"What? Why?"

Aria pulled her legs off Spencer and sat up, folding them underneath her body. She looked at her best friend like she had three heads. "Because you idiot! He's going to break up with me!"

"Don't tell him." Spencer was calm, and serious.

"What?"

"Do you plan on cheating on him again?"

"NO! If he forgave me, I would never. I'm sure the thought wouldn't even cross my mind."

"Then what would be the benefit of telling him?" Spencer watched Aria ponder her question. "You made a mistake, and you won't make it again. Don't tell him. Plus if you hadn't had sex with her you would have had sex with someone eventually and you would have realized what you have now. Be grateful for this mistake because now you're certain about you and him, and certainty is priceless. Telling him might make you have to pay a price you can't afford. Don't tell him. People only tell their mates they cheated for selfish reasons. They want to relieve their guilt, but end up crushing their mates feelings and trust in the process. Don't be selfish munchkin, do not tell him, trust me." Spencer was speaking from experience.

After Spencer made Meilani squirt they took a long shower together where they made love again. They made love on the bathroom floor as soon as they were done, and again on the bedroom floor. When the finally made it to Meilani's bed Spencer sat up and prepared to be honest about everything that had occurred with Maya. Meilani flew into a fit of rage and she and Spencer argued. At first Spencer let Meilani get everything off her chest, but once she started calling Spencer names, Spencer stood up for herself. This only enraged Meilani more and she almost backhanded Spencer. She was too shocked to move a muscle, she just held her gaze and a few tears left her eyes. Meilani grabbed Spencer by her neck and was about to kiss her when Spencer pushed her off. She cried and pushed Meilani again. She asked her how could she think to do that, she screamed and cried and Meilani let her. She apologized over and over and eventually Spencer gave in. She couldn't help but think how she hadn't even cheated, but should have kept everything to herself. She was madly in love with Meilani and she promised to never think to do it again, that was little over three months ago. Their relationship is stronger than ever, but she'll always have it in the back of her mind that her girlfriend is capable of violence.

"Wow, Spencer." Aria said, breaking Spencer's moment lost in thought. "Sometimes I think you're a fucking genius."

"Only sometimes?" Spencer smirked and Aria hopped in her lap and covered her face with as many kisses as she could.

X

"I haven't seen you in two weeks! I thought we were going to spend some alone time together Mel! You could have warned me!"

"Nani, please." Meilani went to take Spencer's arm, but she jerked it away.

"Don't nani me!"

"They just showed up, it was a surprise."

"Whatever I'm leaving."

"Don't go, please." Meilani followed Spencer to her bedroom door and grabbed her arm.

"What the hell are you going to do? Hit me?" Spencer spat.

Meilani closed her eyes and smiled a wry smile. She inhaled deeply then let go of her girlfriend's arm. "How many times do I have to apologize for that? I thought we were okay, I didn't hit you."

"But you were going to. Look just have fun, I guess I'll see you when you have some time for me."

"What do you want me to do? Send them away? They are my brothers and sisters and I rarely see them as is, I didn't know they were coming, can't we all just hang out? You'll have me all to yourself tonight." Meilani tried to touch Spencer but she moved away again. "Spencer."

"You ever hit any of your other girlfriends?"

Meilani sighed. "Spencer..."

"Have you?"

"The woman before you. We had a very...volatile relationship, we fought constantly. The only time we weren't fighting is when we were having sex. She...hit me first, I hit her back, that was how it began. Things weren't always violent, but it happened one time too many. That relationship really messed me up Spencer." Meilani sat on the edge of her bed. Spencer could hear and clearly see just how damaged she was. "I would never hurt you baby, that's why I caught myself, I was mortified that I even..." A single tear rolled down her cheek. "Is this going to ruin us? I can't lose you..."

"No Mel, of course not. I'm just frustrated, I'm sorry, and we are good. We're great actually." She ran her fingers through Meilani's hair as she pulled her close and Meilani laid her head on her chest. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come here and flip out on you, I just wanted us to have some alone time, but I'm acting like a brat, I'm sorry."

"It's okay baby, you were upset, I get it." Meilani looked up at Spencer. "When are you going to get serious about me?"

"I am serious."

"No, I mean serious, serious."

"Like marriage?" Spencer hoped that's what Meilani was hinting at.

"How many kids do you want?"

"One."

"Beautiful, I'm one of six and you only want one? My mother is not going for that, she wants tons of grandkids."

"Her other children can give them to her, I only want one."

"Why?"

"So that we can give him or her our undivided attention. So that we can spoil it to death. So that it won't have a brother or sister who hates it."

"Spencer...we are not you parents. We can raise our children to love one another, respect one another. And most importantly they will know that we love both of them, with all our hearts."

"I don't want history repeating itself."

"Nani..."

"One Mel, that's it."

"If that's what you want nani, you're lucky I can't get you pregnant." She joked.

"I want you to carry it." Spencer said cautiously.

Meilani laughed harder than Spencer had ever heard her then her face turned serious. "Never gonna happen."

"Okay well, then I want to carry your baby."

"As in you be the birth mom and I be the biological mom?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Have you looked in the mirror lately? You're so gorgeous, I want a little boy or a little girl that looks just like you."

"If that's what you want. You're every wish is my command." They kissed a long passionate kiss until they heard Hawaiian on the other side of the door. Meilani's youngest brother told them to stop sucking face and come downstairs.

"I think I'll let you spend some time alone with them, just call me tomorrow."

"No, come with me. Do you not like my siblings, I thought..."

"No baby, they're great but...I'm um...not sure they all like me."

"None sense nani."

"Baby, I'm actually sure of it."

Spencer watched Meilani's eyes grow so dark she became fearful. "Which one." Her voice was low and angry.

"Enakai."

"What did she do?" Meilani's rage was growing by the second.

"She just...she doesn't like me. She thinks I'm after your money."

"Let's go." Meilani pulled Spencer by her hand and swung open the bedroom door, she rushed down the steps and into the game room where her five brothers and sisters were setting up a game of twister.

"Enakai!"

The room that was just filled with laughter fell silent. "what's got your panties in a bunch?" She glanced over at Spencer who was standing in the archway.

"You think Spencer is after my money?"

Enakai's eyes immediately darted back over to Spencer. She spoke in Hawaiian, telling her oldest sister that she simply didn't trust her, there was something off.

"You do realize I've learned and practiced the language for almost a year now, right?" Spencer asked.

"Whatever, I don't trust her. There."

Meilani got in Enakai's face, Spencer could have sworn she saw steam coming out of her ears. "You listen to me and you listen to me good. I don't give a damn what you think about Spencer. She's the most honest, trustworthy person I've ever know. She's even honest with me when she doesn't have to be." Spencer knew she was referring to the Maya debacle. "I'm in love with her and she is my future wife and the mother of your future niece or nephew. You don't have to like her, but you will respect her, got it? If not you can get the hell out of my house!"

The regret and fear painted on Enakai's face almost made Spencer wish she kept her mouth shut, almost.

"I got it big sis. I'm sorry Spencer."

"Okay, thank you." Spencer said politely.

"Now," Hikialani spoke up, "who wants to get their ass kicked at twister?"

"You're on Kia, nani, you wanna play with us?"

"Uh, yeah, only if no one cries when I beat them."

"Oh please, I'm the twister champ." Hikialani boasted.

"We'll see about that."

X

Spencer hurt everyone's feelings after winning three rounds of twister. She was laying in the arms of her lover with their sweat soaked naked flesh pressed together. They just finished round three and Spencer was ready for more, she began sucking lightly on Meilani's neck.

"Whoa nani, you're literally insatiable."

"It's you, you do this to me, I can't get enough." She alternated between licking and sucking on Meilani's most sensitive spots.

"Hold on just a minute, I need you to do me a favor." Spencer pulled back to look in her lover's perfect brown eyes. "I need you to stop trying to get me angry."

"What are you talking about?"

You've tried to get me angry ever since that night. You want to see if you can get me upset enough to hit you, I'm not stupid nani."

"I just wanted to...make sure."

"Spencer, if I'm being honest, I probably _can_ get that angry. Why risk it? Why try to provoke me?"

"I just want to know you won't. Not matter how angry you get."

"Fair enough. Beautiful, I will never put my hands on you in a violent way. That's a promise."

"No matter what?"

"No matter what baby."

"I love you Mel."

"Why don't you show me just how much you love me?"

X

"So? What do you think?" Samara asked half expecting her girlfriend to say she was crazy.

"California? What would I do there?"

"You could open up your restaurant like you want. Or you could start with a catering business and expand. It's a lot of money to be made out there. You could do whatever you want."

"I'm not sure. That's a long way from Rosewood."

"Duh, that's the point. They have these things called airplanes, you can visit your mom and dad whenever you want."

"And what will you be doing?"

"I haven't figured that out yet." Samara said solemnly. "But that's why I want to leave Rosewood, so I can find my dream."

"And you think your dream is on the other side of the country?" They were laying in Samara's bed on the last day of August, holding each other as they normally did after they made love.

"Emily I have no idea where my dream is, but it's not here, and I need to go find it. It doesn't have to be California, I was just throwing it out there. Wherever you are is what I dream of, I just want to be with you, but I want to leave Rosewood, that's for certain. Emily, if you want to stay, then this is where I'll be."

"I can't ask you to do that."

"You aren't asking. I'm not leaving here without you, that's not an option. Look, I know we're young and this is still really new to you, but I know what I want, and it's you. Forever."

"Forever? As in married with babies forever?"

"If...if I'm lucky enough. I hope you keep me around. As long as you want me, I'm yours."

"Sammy...I love you so much." She kissed Samara on her cheek, nose and forehead before her lips. With their arms and legs intertwined, their lips and tongue did what they had perfected over the last eight months. "I bet they have really good culinary schools in LA."

"Oh my God, are you serious or you just fucking with me?"

"I'll come with you, but that means you have to stay in Rosewood for another year after you graduate."

"I don't care I'll do whatever just as long as when I do leave this place, you're by my side."

"It's settled then."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes baby." Emily kissed Samara's nose. "You do realize it's two years and ten months before I graduate right?"

"Of course, you're worth the wait though. I love you Emily."

"I love you too, so much." They nuzzled into each other's necks. "So, so much Sammy."

X

September

October

November

X

"Mel?" Spencer walked into the home that she normally slept in. It was dark, no movement, no sounds, no Meilani. "Mel?" Spencer text her girlfriend.

**Mel where are you? I thought you said you'd be home be 6, it's 7:30**

**I'm still in Philly**

**Are you working?**

**No, just thinking**

**About?**

**Just got a lot on my mind...Spencer could you come here?**

**To the Comcast Center?**

**Yeah, there's something I need to talk to you about**

**Good something or bad something?**

**Something I'm not gonna discuss thru text.**

**Fine, I'm on my way**

Spencer turned back towards the door, hopped in her car, and headed for the expressway. When she arrived at Meilani's office building, it was dark. The lights were dimmed and the jumbo screen was blank. She thought it was unusual since there had never been a time day or night, it wasn't playing. Soon as she walked in the doors she saw her name light up on the screen.

_Spencer, I can't believe I'm so blessed to have found you. You're perfect in every way imaginable. You Spencer, have changed my world. I'm so madly in love with you. Please Spencer, be mine forever._

As the words flashed across the screen, Spencer didn't blink, she was afraid she might miss something. Two dozen men in all white tuxedo suits lined up on either side of the building. That's when she saw Meilani, dressed in a form-fitting black cocktail dress. She was holding a single white rose and she slowly made her way to Spencer who was still standing inches from the door.

"Nani, I knew there was something special about you the moment you walked into the Grille. Then when we came here, I knew I'd make you my wife. I think we know everything a person should know about someone before the take the next step. And I know, without a shadow of a doubt, there is no one else on this planet for me. Spencer Hastings, will you be my wife, will you marry me?"

Spencer's heart was beating a 100 mph she thought, her face was covered in happy tears and she could barely speak, but she managed to whisper "yes". Meilani squealed and picked her fiancé up and spun her around as two of the twenty-four men threw white rose petals over them. She sat her down and turned her attention to the men.

"Gentlemen?" Meilani said and all twenty-four men pulled a black velvet ring box from their jacket pockets, they one by one opened them, Meilani turned back to Spencer. "Pick one."


	22. Chapter 19

Spencer admired her seven six carat engagement ring. All twenty four rings were five carats or more, she chose a pear shaped pink diamond ring, it was perfect. She was so engrossed with her ring that she didn't hear her door open.

"Is that...is that and engagement ring? Spencer, are you engaged?"

Spencer turned around to see a horrified look on her favorite student's face. She stood up and was eye to eye with the 15-year-old. Emily had grown two inches over the summer and was now five nine just like Spencer, she also had developed quite a bit. Spencer thought she was growing more gorgeous by the day, not to mention she was one of the sweetest people she had ever met. Since last year Emily would come a lot in the morning to sit and chat with Spencer, but once Samara go her car, Emily's visits had become less frequent. One day Spencer playfully said Emily doesn't love her anymore which Emily was offended to hear, she apologized for disappearing on her and promised to visit her one morning every week with her favorite muffins. She hasn't missed a Friday since.

"Yes, I am. My girlfriend, you've met her a few times, Mel, she proposed last night."

"I don't...um, wow...uh, I don't know what to say."

"Typically people say congratulations."

"Oh right, uh, congrats." Emily put down the muffins and hugged Spencer. "Are you happy?" Emily asked as she pulled away.

"Over the moon."

"Well then I am too. I guess these are congratulatory muffins." She said looking at the Tupperware.

"Oh, my favorite." They ate their muffins and talked about nothing until the first bell rang.

X

**The next day**

"Are we going on vacation?" Spencer asked as she walked into Meilani's bedroom. She was scurrying from her closet to her bed where there were two open suitcases.

"I wish." Meilani said without looking at Spencer. "My mother had a heart attack."

"Oh my god." Spencer dropped her bag and rushed over to her girlfriend. "Is she okay?"

"Yeah, I think so. I have to leave, the jet is waiting on me."

"I'll come with you." Meilani looked like she might think about it but quickly shook her head. "Why not?"

"Baby, please, I just need to make sure she's alright and I'll be right back okay? You can't just abandon your students, I don't have a timetable for my return so, just hold the house down until I get back. Can you do that for me?"

"Absolutely, no problem." Spencer kissed Meilani who pulled away hastily.

"As much as I love your lips, I gotta go. Be expecting me to Skype you in about ten to eleven hours from now, my mom will want to see the ring."

"Okay. I love you."

"I love you too nani."

X

"Hello?"

"Hey Spencer." Not a good sign, Meilani sounded exhausted and she rarely used Spencer's name. She'd been in Hawaii for four days and Spencer was going crazy.

"Hey baby, how's your mom?"

"She had another heart attack. A massive heart attack...she didn't make it." Meilani said calmly.

Spencer gasp and covered her mouth, she tried to fight off the tears that were stinging her eyes. "Oh my God baby, I'm so sorry." She didn't know what to say or what to do. Meilani and Olina shared a love and bond Spencer never knew with her own mother. She knew her girlfriend was beyond distraught at the loss. "I thought she was doing better."

"Yeah," She sighed. "She was. Her doctors told us the found an irregularity with her heart last year and they advised surgery, which she of course refused. She told them she would just eat better and exercise more and that would fix it. Doctors said had she gotten the surgery she could have lived another 20 years or so."

"I'm so sorry baby. Oh my God how's Kia?"

"He's a wreck, he's inconsolably. He's really torn apart. He's the baby ya know, he was closer to her than any of us."

"How's your dad?"

"Just as bad as Kia, maybe worse."

"Baby, how are you?"

"I'm holding up. I have too much to take care of at the moment. My dad, my brothers and sisters, my mother's affairs. I can't afford to be mush right now, everyone's depending on me."

"I'm sure no one is expecting you to be superwoman, you just lost you mom."

"No one might be, but I expect that of myself. I'm the oldest, this falls on my shoulders, and my mom would...she'd be ashamed if I didn't handle everything properly. Trust me, when I'm done here and I get back to Rosewood, I'll break down. I just need to know you'll hold me."

"That's not even a question, of course I'll be there for you. When's the funeral? I'll book a flight."

"No need, I'll send the jet for you. Bring something white to wear, we wear white to our funerals. We choose to celebrate one's life rather than grieve for their death. We also carry pieces of ti leaf and alae salt on our bodies to chase away the evil spirits and bless our house. She'll be cremated and we'll scatter her ashes in the ocean, just thought I should prepare you."

"Okay baby. I love you."

"I love you too nani. I'll text your flight info, I'll have a car pick you up though. Talk to you later. Bye."

"Bye."

X

Spencer was back in Rosewood minus her fiancé, Meilani had much to do regarding her mother's assets and estate. There was also a lengthy discussion about the family business after the beautiful ceremony. Spencer was back on a plan the same day she landed, and missed Meilani terribly. But she understood that as the oldest, her girlfriend was responsible for taking care of her family. It's been five days since she left Hawaii and Meilani's house seemed even bigger without her there. She insisted Spencer stay there, to look after things, and Spencer agreed. She was in awe of how calm and serene Meilani was the whole time she was with her, but she hadn't forgotten that Meilani needed to break down, but only when she got home. She was about to go to sleep when her phone rang, she smiled at the picture of Meilani that popped up.

"Hey."

"Nani, baby, it's so good to hear your voice."

"You too. I miss you."

"I miss you too baby."

"How are you and everyone?"

"Better. Spencer, we need to talk."

"Nothing good ever follows that sentence, what is it?"

"I've decided to stay in Hawaii. I need to be with my family."

"Right, of course. I'd do the same thing if it were me, for how long?"

"Spencer, what I mean is that...I'm moving back here."

"What about work?"

"I'm resigning, I've come to terms with the fact that I have to take my mother's place in her company. Plus I have to take care of everyone."

"So you plan on being there...permanently?"

"I don't know yet, more than likely. Her home offices are here, so..."

"Oh..." Spencer let a silent tear roll down her cheek

"Spencer, we can make this work, this doesn't have to be..."

"I can't do long distance. I learned that about myself a long time ago. Long distance just doesn't work."

"It could."

"Not for me."

"Move here. Come be with me here."

"Mel...I can't"

"I know it's bold to ask you to pick up and leave..."

"Yet you're asking."

"Spencer. Please."

"Aria...I can't leave her. And under different circumstances, she would come with me. But for the first time in her life, literally the first time, she's in love. She'd kill me if I leave. My life is here Mel, my job, my..." She wanted to say her family, but they were never close. "Everything is here. I can't move to Hawaii." More silent tears fell and her heart was barely beating.

"I want to marry you, I want you to be my wife...is that not a good enough reason?"

"My students. I love them so much. Do I leave them behind? Do I abandon 125 kids who I told I would be there for, since day one? Do I sacrifice everything?"

Meilani begins to cry "Spencer..."

Spencer had never seen nor heard Meilani cry in the year and two months they'd been together. She didn't even shed a tear during her mother's ceremony. "Meilani, please don't cry." Even though she herself was crying.

"I just...I can't, not be here Spencer. This is where I have to be, I don't really have a choice."

"I know, I understand believe me."

"So what, this is it? This is the end of us?"

"I'm sorry Mel, but we can't be together like this. It just...it won't work. And I can't move, I can't leave my home"

"Spence, please. I love you. You're everything I never knew I needed. You make feel like I can fly and I don't want my feet to touch the ground, not like this."

"Mel, you just need to focus on your family, and being there for you brothers and sisters, they need you more than I do."

"This is a mistake. Please we could..."

"Meilani, I can't!" Meilani began to sobbed as Spencer felt her heart crumble.

She cried for a long while but Meilani knew she had to face the reality of the situation. "Can we talk still?"

"I don't think that's a good idea, how are we suppose to move on still holding on to each other?"

"I don't want to move on Spencer! I don't want you to let me go. Please."

"This is what's best, Mel." Spencer wanted to break down like Meilani, but she had to be strong for her.

"I love you." Meilani whispered.

"I love you too Mel, you should get back to your family."

"Spencer..."

"Bye Mel." Her heart wasn't working anymore, it couldn't take anymore devastation.

After a long moment Spencer heard the dial tone.

X

Over the next few days Emily noticed a change in Spencer. What she didn't notice was the missing ring. When the bell rung everyone exited the class except Emily. Spencer didn't notice, it was like she was in a daze. She just slumped in her chair and put her head on her desk. Emily waited to say something, she wanted to see if she would cry, when she didn't, Emily spoke up.

"Spencer?" Her head shot up, she then glanced at the clock.

"Em, you're late for class, you better get going."

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what's wrong." Emily said firmly. "Spencer, you're really scaring me."

"God Emily, I'm sorry. I'll try a little harder to not bring my personal problems to work."

"Spencer?" Emily got up from her desk and walked over to sit in the chair next to Spencer's desk.

"I know I'm just a kid in your eyes..."

"That's not how I look at you."

"How do you then?"

"Like a smart, incredible young woman, who's gonna be famous one day and come back with a camera crew and tell the world I'm the best teacher you ever had." Spencer's half smile warmed Emily's heart.

"You _are_ the best teacher anyone could ever ask for."

"That means so much to me Em, really."

"Are you gonna tell me what's wrong, I'm sure you know by now how good I am at keeping secrets." Spencer did know she could trust Emily, she proved it on more than one occasion. And even though she was her student, the way they interacted felt more like a friendship.

"I had to break off my engagement."

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Why?"

"She lost her mother, who is, was, a billionaire businesswoman. So with Mel being the oldest of her six kids, she put in her will she wanted Mel to take her place in the event of her death. Mel had the option to either take the position or relinquish her share and sell it to the rest of the board members. She chose to take over her family's business, essentially pick up where her mom left off."

"Why did that cause y'all to break up?"

"She had to move back to Hawaii in order to take over. A ten-hour plane ride to see my wife? I just, we couldn't, there was no way. She suggested I move there but...I couldn't pick up and leave. Leave the only home I've ever known, leave Aria, leave you guys. There was no other way." Spencer said sadly as a unwanted tear left her eye.

"Oh Spencer." Emily got up and hugged her teacher, Spencer didn't hesitate to welcome the embrace, she wrapped her arms around Emily's waist and soaked her shirt.

**TALK TO ME PEOPLE...**


	23. Chapter 20

**PLEASE READ**

**IF YOU ARE A SENSITIVE PERSON (LIKE ME) DO NOT START READING THIS WITHOUT SOME TISSUE BY YOUR SIDE OKAY? OH YEAH, THERE'S SOME SMUT IN HERE...YOU'VE BEEN WARNED**

December

January

"We have been together a year and a month right? Over a year and you still can't tell your parents? Your friends know, practically everyone at school knows, my family knows. Yet here I am still your dirty little secret." Samara complained.

"Sammy please not right now. If you're just gonna jump down my throat for the millionth time because you want me to tell my mom and dad, I can just go home." Emily started to get up from Samara's bed.

"Wait." Samara said, pulling Emily back down.

"I really, really hate it when you call yourself my dirty little secret. It really gets under my skin and hurts my feelings. Like I _want_ to hide us or something. I don't, I'm just not ready to tell them."

"Baby," Samara said softening her tone. "After a year? We plan on spending our lives together right?"

"Of course, don't ask me that like I'm not sure about us." Emily took Samara's face into her hands. "I love you more than you could ever imagine. Sometimes I think my heart is gonna burst out my chest. Please just...I'm not ready. You can't determine when I'll be ready nor can I. We can't put a timetable on it."

"What if we could?"

Emily paused. "I'm listening."

"When we leave for Cali, then any backlash you may get wouldn't matter because one, you'll be eighteen and two, you'll be out of their house and on your own."

Emily thought about it for a moment. "I think that could work, unless I feel ready before then."

"Okay so we agree?"

"Yes baby."

"I love you Emily."

"I love you Samara."

They moved slowly to the other's lips, relishing the sensation once they touched. Emily parted her lips so Samara slipped her tongue in her mouth. Their tongues dueled with one another until they found the perfect rhythm. Emily laid down and pulled her girlfriend on top of her. She began tugging at the hem of her shirt. Samara helped her out by removing it completely. She reattached her lips to Emily's. Samara felt Emily's hand cup her backside. Her hands inched up to her bra and it was quickly discarded. Emily rolled on top of Samara and gazed at her for a bit. She stroked her hair and told her she loved her, to which Samara reciprocated the affection. They kissed again. Emily removed her own shirt and bra before going after Samara's jeans which found their way to her floor. They kissed some more. When Emily pulled back again Samara asked her to make love to her, a request that wasn't often made. Samara liked it fast and rough, but tonight she seemed to want it sweet and delicate, and Emily was more than happy to give in. She leaned back down to kiss her girlfriend, Samara's lips and tongue felt perfect attached to her own.

She laid in between her legs, kissing her, for a long while, slowly grinding her hips to cause a little friction. Emily heard her name being whispered softly when she started to lick and suck Samara's neck. Emily pulled back again to look at the girl who had changed so much since they met. She no longer skipped class, she no longer talked ill of her parents, she had actually tried to get to know them a little better. She and Emily would go to New York every Saturday to hang with her dad. She didn't hang around Garrett so much anymore, and she had matured greatly. She was getting straight A's and Emily couldn't have been more proud. She recalled the first A she had gotten her entire high school career. Samara swooped Emily into her arms and kissed her repeatedly in front of a highly populated hallway. She told Emily how much she loved her and how much she is a better person just from knowing her. From then on their secret was out at school.

Emily kissed down Samara's body and paused at her nipple. She gently licked circles and sucked. She kissed all over both of her breast as Samara moaned and gripped her hair. She made her way down her midsection and pulled her panties down, leaving a trail of kisses down her legs. Emily took Samara's leg by her ankle and kissed it. She laid slow, loving kisses down until she reached the inside of her thigh. Then she took the other leg and repeated. Emily looked in amazement at the wetness between Samara's parted legs. Samara sat up and pushed Emily down on the bed. She took her jeans and underwear off at the same time. She kissed her body up and down then turned her over. She kissed Emily's neck, then back, then legs. Each kiss more tender than the last. She turned Emily over and slid up her body placing her lips on hers. Emily rubbed her hands up and down Samara's back. Samara sat up and straddled one of Emily's thighs. She spread her legs and made their centers meet. She made sure to part her folds, and Emily's too, before completely lowering herself onto her girlfriend, the love of her life. Samara knew how lucky she was to have Emily and if she had a say in it, she would never let her go.

Samara placed her hands on either side of Emily and started to roll her hips. Emily moaned out Samara's name and told her she loved her once again. Neither had ever tired of hearing it, and she was sure neither ever would. Samara picked up her pace but only a little. She was sensual and graceful, soft and sweet. Perfect Emily thought. The thought of Samara being her only lover for the rest of her life put a smile on her face. A smile that was quickly interrupted by her girlfriend's lips as she leaned down to kiss her. Their centers still connected, the friction between the two superb. Samara felt so good Emily was brought to tears, which Samara kissed away. She told her she loved her and Emily promptly replied. Samara sat back up and quickened her pace again, while still being unrushed. She grinded on Emily as their wetness increased and they climaxed at the same time. Emily's nails dug into the back she had left marks on so many times. Samara loved the pain, the pain of bringing Emily pleasure. Emily would always kiss the scratch marks she would leave, and Samara would always feel better.

After catching her breath she climbed off Emily and told her she wanted to do everything together. She laid on her side and so did Emily. She slid her hand between her legs and Emily did the same. They both bent their knees and entered each other at the same time. They pumped in and out at the same pace and they once again climaxed at the same time. Samara climbed back on Emily and straddled her face, she lowered herself and was faced with Emily's womanhood. Emily quickly began to devour Samara from behind, and Samara ran her tongue up and down Emily's wetness at an agonizing pace. Emily stopped eating to ask her girlfriend to stop teasing her. Samara said she wanted Emily to follow her lead and move at the same speed she was. Emily complied. They leisurely licked one another until they brought each other to erupting orgasms. Once again Emily clawed at Samara's back, her lower back was all she could reach. Samara knew there would be more than a few marks, but the were worth it. She got off Emily and turned herself around to be face to face with her. They kissed each other sweetly for two hours, until Emily had to go home.

X

**The next day**

Emily was waiting on Samara to pick her up for school like she did everyday except Fridays. Her phone rang.

"Hey baby, I thought I'd go to Wawa and get you your favorite breakfast sandwich and some tea."

"That's so sweet, you didn't have to do that."

"I know, I wanted to. Figure I'd treat you nice since you made me come so hard yesterday."

Emily giggled. "You are so nasty Sammy."

"And you love it. I'll see you in about 15 minutes."

"Okay, I love you."

"I love you too. Bye"

"Bye." Emily looked at her phone, 30 minutes before they had to be to school, 15 minutes away, 10 minute drive to school, they had time.

X

Pam fields hesitantly walked onto her porch and stood in front of her door. Her head hung low as she wiped her eyes. It was 9:02am. She knew her daughter hadn't gone to school and would more than likely be downstairs. She would have no time to collect herself, so she had to pull herself together before she put her key in the lock. She shut her eyes tight and inhaled deeply. She exhaled slowly and took her keys out of her purse. The door unlocked and in an instant her daughter was in the entryway of their home, phone pressed to her ear.

"Mom! I'm so sorry I ditched school but Sammy was supposed to go to Wawa and come here to get me only she never showed up and I've been calling her and texting non stop but she hasn't responded I have no idea where she is..." Emily didn't stop to take a breath in between her words explaining why she wasn't at school, she also didn't see how sad her mom's eyes were.

"Emily, let's go sit in the living room." Pam softly took the frantic Emily by her elbow and lead her into the room she and her best friend stayed up many a nights in. She sat down on their couch as did Emily. "They brought Samara into the hospital a little while ago." She knew she had to get right down to it.

"Oh thank God." Emily stood from the couch and put her hand over her exasperated heart. "Is she okay?" Pam pulled her daughter back down in a seated position, as close to her as possible, readying herself to console her only child.

"Honey, there was a high-speed chase. A man, he was trying to evade arrest. Samara was driving." She didn't know how to say it but it couldn't go unsaid. "He ran a red light, the front of his car collided with the driver's side of her car."

"Mom? Please..." Her heart raced, she feared it would escape her body. Tears freely fell from her eyes upon realizing what her mom was trying to tell her. But she hadn't said the words yet, maybe there was a chance. "Please mom...please tell me she's alright." Her words were quite, weary, uncertain, pleading. "Mom?"

Pam knew she had to be strong, Emily needed her. She suppressed the tears building up resolving to cry later. She swallowed the lump in her throat and continued. "Emmy, He was going over 100 miles per hour. She...she died on impact."

Emily screamed, shaking her head as if it would help her un-hear what her mother just told her, what she feared just might be true. It couldn't be true. She was only 17 years old. She had her whole life ahead of her. She had plans, she wanted to leave Rosewood, and Emily would follow her wherever she wanted to go. They would build a life together. Sammy would forever be her first, last and only. Her first kiss, her first love, the first person with whom she had made love, and the only. Forever. How could Samara's life be over, how could their "forever" only be a year? This wasn't happening, this couldn't be happening this was impossible. They'd just spoke on the phone, she was getting her some breakfast. Wait...she was getting _her_ breakfast. If she wasn't at Wawa she would still be alive. Was this her fault? Was her girlfriend being kind and sweet as she always is...was...what got her killed. Wrong place at the wrong time. Following the traffic laws, riding through an intersection, her light green, his red, and in a blink of an eye, she was gone?

"No. NOOOOOOOOOO! Please mom, please! NOOOO. Please no...please. Sammy! Noooo, please Sammy! Not...not...why!? I can't live without her, she was..." She was her everything, she was one of her best friends, she was her lover, she was her confidant, she meant the world to her. She loved her, and Sammy loved her back. How could she go on living in a world without her Sammy? It wasn't possible, she didn't want it to be possible.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry." Damn human emotions taking control, spilling out her eyes at the sight of her daughter breaking down. She wanted to wait and cry in private, be Emily's rock, but it was a loss cause.

Emily slid off the couch and crumpled on the floor. Holding her sides in an effort to hold herself together. If she let go of herself, she knew she would shatter into a million pieces. Why was this happening?

"WHY!? WHHHHHHHHHYYYYY?! She...can't...NOOOOOO...how could she...how could she leave me?" Pam could barely make out what her daughter was saying through her screams and sobs. She knew her little girl would never be the same again, but she'd deal with that later. Right now, all she could do was lie beside her daughter on the floor and take her into her arms.

**I HAD THIS PLANNED FROM THE BEGINNING, BUT AS I WROTE IT, I BEGAN TO THINK AGAINST IT. PARTICULARLY WHEN I STARTED TO CRY. I THOUGHT "MAYBE THEY COULD BREAK UP ANOTHER WAY" BUT IN THE END I HAD TO DO IT.**

**DON'T HATE ME.**

**BTW I DID LITERALLY CRY, I WAS SO SAD WRITING THIS EVEN THOUGH IT'S ONLY A STORY, I CRIED FOR SAMMY AND I CRIED FOR EMILY.**

**POOR EMILY, BUT SHE'S A FIGHTER...**

**WE AREN'T TERRIBLY FAR FROM "SPEMILY"...PERHAPS THAT WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS CHARACTER DEATH...**

**BTW THOSE OF YOU WHO COULDN'T WAIT FOR THIS OR MISUNDERSTOOD SAMMY, YOU'RE THE REASON I STAYED ON THIS PATH, WHY I COULDN'T BREAK THEM UP ANY OTHER WAY**

**R.I.P. SAMARA COOK**

**ANYTHING YOU'D LIKE TO SAY TO ME?**


	24. Chapter 21

She wasn't sure she'd ever been this sad in her life, not even after Maya. Spencer was so distraught, even though it's been two months, that Aria had been by her side almost every waking moment. They sat at Aria's kitchen table eating grilled cheese sandwiches.

"You think she got the ring?" Aria wondered out loud.

"I highly doubt she's been back to Rosewood since...I doubt it."

"You think she'll call?"

"Once again doubtful." Spencer removed everything she owned from Meilani's house. However she left any and everything the beautiful Hawaiian had ever brought her, including her engagement ring.

"She'll probably be pissed." Ezra chimed in.

"Why do you say that?" Aria wanted to know.

"It's a pride thing. From you girls talking about her and the time I spent with her, especially alone, she's kinda like a guy. She'll be pissed, trust me. I'd be."

"I'm not following." Spencer admitted.

"It's like this Spencer, she wanted you to spend the rest of your lives together, to which you agreed. Then, for some unforeseen circumstances, y'all had to break up. She gave you all those fancy expensive gifts not because she was trying to buy you or show off, but because she loved you and wanted to spoil you rotten. Now here comes the ring. It was her way to show you she wanted you to be hers forever, then you broke her heart. You pack up all your shit and leave every gift she ever brought you? Once she gave those things to you they became yours, she doesn't want them back. You've given her all the ammunition she'll need to call you and possibly berate you for leaving the stuff, but that won't be what she's truly upset about, it'll be because you left the ring. I _guarantee_ you she never wanted to see that ring again, what the hell is she supposed to do with it? She's not gonna take it back to where she purchased it, she's not gonna give it to someone else. She'll have to keep it and have it be a constant reminder of her failed love. I'm sure she would have been less upset if she found out you pawned it, not left it in some envelope with a Dear John letter."

Both Spencer and Aria allowed Ezra's words to marinate in their brains. He made perfect sense.

X

Spencer stared at Emily's empty seat as Mona Vanderwaal read her oral report. In the two years she's been teaching, Emily had never missed one day. Not even when she was sick, she would just quietly work and blow her nose. Spencer was wracked with worry, she thought to call Pam Fields to see if maybe she had a doctor's appointment or something. Then she thought about Samara, Emily's too old, and wreckless girlfriend. She knew they had been together for at least a year, and Emily had never skipped class before, but what if Samara had convinced her today. Spencer's thoughts were so wrapped up in Emily's absence that she didn't hear the bell ring. She stood up from her desk ready to chastise her students for leaving, then she looked at the clock and felt a bit silly. She waved goodbye to her beloved students and sat back down, still wondering where Emily could be. Her classroom door flung open and Aria stood in the doorway with a weird expression on her face.

"Munchkin? Is everything alright?"

"One of my students was killed in a car accident this morning." Aria said so fast Spencer almost didn't catch it.

"Oh my God? Who?" Spencer asked, leaning back in her chair.

"Sammy Cook." Aria said clearly shaken.

Spencer shot up out her chair so fast that it crashed against the chalkboard with a loud thud. "Emily!"

"She wasn't with her, it was just Sammy." Aria said with tears in her eyes.

Spencer and Aria had gotten into a little argument over Samara when she found out she and Emily were dating. Spencer had a huge problem with it and talked it over with Aria. Problem was, Samara was one of her favorite students. She loved how brash and witty she was, Aria said she reminded her of a younger version of herself, only more badass. And a not so shabby painter. Spencer could see the similarities, but she didn't think she was good enough for Emily. With that aside, a life is a life, and she may not have been fond of her, but it was still heartbreaking to know that life was now over. She walked over to Aria and took her into her arms, she smoothed her hair as Aria let tears fall freely. In that moment she thought of Emily, her heart ached knowing she couldn't console her this very second like she was consoling Aria. Then it dawned on her why Emily wasn't in school.

X

Yesterday was Samara's funeral. Emily hadn't said so much as one word since monday when her mom told her about Samara's passing. She hadn't been to school all week and today was no different. Mona or Paige or both would come over to give her homework and missed assignments, which she would complete with tears in her eyes. Crying had become almost second nature. It was as if she no longer had any control over her tear ducts. A steady stream of tears plagued her for hours before they'd let up. After twenty or so odd minutes, they'd resume. Emily wept on her living room floor for hours with her mother holding her tight, as she too wept silently. She knew her mom was devastated, Samara had become a permanent fixture in the Field's home, almost like a second daughter. But Emily couldn't worry herself with how others felt about the lost. She selfishly thought only she'd be affected. That was until she saw Samara's mom and dad at the funeral yesterday. Mrs. Cook was a blubbering mess and Mr. Cook looked like he was barely holding it together. Samara's mom gave Emily a box that had her name in large letters on it written in Samara's handwriting. She knew what the contents were. Samara always gave Emily cards and gifts, sometimes for no occasion at all. Fearing that Pam would find them she gave Emily a box to put them in and stored it in her closet. When Mrs. Cook found it, she figured Emily would want it. She hugged Emily tighter than any other attendees, and she didn't seem to mind that Emily hadn't so much as greeted her, they could barely look at each other. Mr. and Mrs. Cook knew Emily and Samara were in love, and they knew she was torn apart.

At some point during the funeral, where they sat in the front row, because Mrs. Cook insisted, Emily looked at her mom. She was silently crying again. The pain on her mom's face made her finally realize she wasn't the only one who lost her, everyone in this church did. Emily couldn't help but roll her eyes as the preacher delivered the sermon. Although she attended church every sunday with the Fields, Samara hated organized religion. Emily semi scoffed at the fact that Samara's funeral was being held at a church, she would have much prefered a crazy party where everyone danced to hip hop music, smoked weed, drank alcohol, and looked at a slide show of her pictures. In fact, that's exactly how she wanted her home going, she had told Emily one night on their way back from Philly. Unfortunately for Samara, Emily couldn't tell her parents of their daughter's last wishes, she couldn't tell anyone anything because she hasn't spoken in four days and didn't plan on it anytime soon. She looked at her mother again who looked broken, and wondered when she would force her to go back to school.

Emily laid in her bed with tears spilling down the side of her face into her ears. With her covers pulled all the way up to her chin, she looked at the ceiling as she recalled the last moments she spent with her dead girlfriend. They fucked each other senseless for hours after church. Then they ate lunch and watched a movie. After the movie they got into a little spat about Emily still being in the closet, then they made love for hours. Emily replayed the day over and over and paused on her favorite portion. After their lovemaking, they made out for hours before Samara drove her home. It was so sweet, it was angelic almost, she could still feel her perfectly soft lips. Emily shuddered at the thought that somewhere deep down inside all of us we know our last moments. Had Samara known her life would be cut short the following day? Somewhere deep in her soul informed her to make love to her girlfriend and kiss her like she would never see her again. Emily thought that could very well be a possibility. Samara asked her to make love to her that night which was rare. She looked into her eyes like she would never see her face again.

She repeated how much she loved her countless times, and she wanted them to climax together, every time. She didn't want one moment to pass that they weren't showing each other how much their union meant, together. As crazy as the thought sounded in her head, she thought it was more than possible. Then why go to Wawa? Why not go straight to Emily's to be safe? Could she feel like something bad might happen and wanted to protect Emily? That could be true, Samara's actions on more than one occasion let Emily know she'd do anything to keep her happy, but most of all, safe. As she replayed their last day together for the millionth time, her mom entered her room, clad in her scrubs. Emily didn't move nor acknowledge her mother's presence, like she hadn't for the last few days. When Pam laid her breakfast on her bed, Emily briefly thought of Spencer and how she was missing their normal Friday morning breakfast and quality time. Just as the smallest amount of guilt filled her, her mom spoke.

"Honey, I've let you stay home this week to mourn. But you have to go to school on Monday okay?" She wiped the tears on Emily's face, only to see new ones appear. "I'm not saying you have to stop hurting, and I'm not saying you have to stop missing her. What _I am_ saying is that you have to continue living. A part of your life is going to school. You have to start putting the pieces back together again." She paused and looked at the uneaten food on the tray she'd left her the night before. She looked down at the breakfast she had just made and hoped beyond hope her daughter would finally eat. "You have to start eating again sweetie, you have to get out of this room. You have to live. I'm going back to work today, I'll have Mary come check on you, she'll probably bring Paige okay?" Emily didn't respond but Pam wasn't shocked. The first few days she tried to get her to talk, but at this point she knew her efforts would continue to be fruitless. "Alright honey I love you. I'll be home around ten."

Pam walked out of the room and closed the door behind her. She reached into her pants pocket and pulled out a wallet sized picture. Samara had given it to her one day after they made lasagna. It was her and Emily hugging each other with their cheeks pressed together. Their smiles were so wide Pam thought it was impossible for anyone to ever look happier. She watched water fall on the picture and realized she was crying again. She wiped her tears and descended the staircase, resolving to remember Samara in that way, happy, smiling, beautiful, instead of the last time she saw her. Emily broken in pieces to have lost Samara, but at least she didn't see her body. Pam shook her head of the last images of Samara and looked at the picture again. She put it back in her pocket, wiped her eyes, and left out the front door.

X

Emily looked at her clock which read 12:01. She had let a full minute pass with the doorbell ringing. She had no desire to see who was bothering her self wallowing. Besides that, a pain coursed through her heart because Samara would always ring the bell repeatedly, like a crazy person. Her mom would yell at her then forgive her the second she gave her a hug. Emily would laugh and ask her mom why it wasn't that easy for her to get out of trouble. Without fail, every time Samara came to her house she'd ring the doorbell just like whoever was doing right now. She knew it couldn't be her girlfriend, she saw her lifeless body lying in a casket. Then saw said casket being lowered into the ground to be buried for eternity. Emily groaned loudly at the constant ringing and realized whoever it was, wasn't going away. She threw her covers off to the side and flew downstairs and angrily ripped open the door. The scream she was ready to let out at the pestering, uninvited guest got swallowed when she saw Spencer Hastings' huge grin.

"Hey there. Do you know how much I've missed you? Can I come in? I've brought goodies." Emily moved to the side to let her teacher in. Even in the deepest depths of despair, she could not help but notice how unbelievably stunning Spencer looked. "Where's the kitchen?" Emily pointed in the right direction and walked through her house with Spencer behind her. She sat the bags down on the kitchen island and pulled Emily into her arms for a long tight embrace. "I'm so sorry about Sammy sweetie." Emily began to sob uncontrollably. Spencer just stroked her hair and let her get it all out.

"I feel like I can't even breath." They were the first word she spoken since asking God why he took Samara away just four days ago. After a good long cry, they let each other go reluctantly and sat on the stools. "What are you doing here on a school day?"

"I've asked Mona and Paige how you were doing and neither seemed to know how to answer that question. So, as wildly inappropriate as this is, I took the day off to spend it with you. Honestly...I couldn't go a second longer without seeing you. You just can't tell anyone, okay?" Emily nodded. "You hungry?" She nodded again. For the first time since Monday morning, she _was _hungry. As much as Emily tried to fight it, all the unrequited feelings she had for Spencer were rushing back like a stampede of raging bulls. The emotions pulled on her heart with a combination of guilt and ease. Why did Spencer Hastings have to be so deliciously perfect?

X

By six Emily had eaten lunch and dinner and watched four movies with Spencer. When Shallow Hal went off Spencer got up and stretched and plopped back down on the couch.

"Wanna talk about it Em?"

"I'm...this is..."

"It's alright, take your time."

"I've never known pain like this. She was my first...everything. She was supposed to be my forever. We started out as just friends and the next thing I know we're rolling around in the snow making out." The smile on her face was the first since Monday morning. "My first kiss was so magical, and it seemed like every moment after that had the same amount of magic behind it. She was pretty much an arrogant butt hole when I first met her, but then I started peeling back the layers and she was..." Emily drifted off thinking about how much Samara had grown, and what she would have become. "She was so incredible Spencer. Sammy wasn't perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but she was my baby, and I loved her. I love her." Emily didn't know she was crying until Spencer scooted closer and wiped her face with both her thumbs. She held Emily's face in her hand and gave her a look of compassion and what Emily thought might have been love. Spencer kissed Emily's forehead and left her lips there a few seconds longer than she should have.

"Em, I know you probably can't see the light at the end of the tunnel here but I _promise _you, you will be alright. One day you'll wake up and it won't hurt as much. Until that day and everyday after, I'm here for you...whenever. Will your mom be home soon?"

"No, she'll be home around ten." The doorbell ringing startled both of them. Emily got up and opened the door to find Paige on the other side.

"My mom said your mom wanted her to come over and check on you but since you've become a mute, I figured I'd come myself. Since I clearly see you are as alright as you could be, I'll leave."

"Paige..."

Paige whipped around faster than she thought humanly possible. "Oh my God Em, I've been waiting for you to come back to me!" Paige exclaimed as she enveloped Emily in a tight hug.

"Thank Spencer for that."

"Who?" Paige asked as she pulled back.

"Ms. Hastings."

"Oh. Um, did give you some sort of sexual favor or something because that's like the only thing I can think of that she could do to cheer you up."

"I most certainly did not have any type of sexual relations with my 15-year-old student Ms. McCullers." Spencer said sternly with a look of anger on her face. Emily smirked.

"Oh, I was...um, I was just kidding around Ms. Hastings, I swear." Paige stammered as the color faded from her face in embarrassment.

Spencer started to laugh so hard she had to hold her sides. Emily joined her and the laughter never felt so good. Paige stood on the Fields' porch dumbfounded. Once Spencer composed herself enough, she looked at Paige.

"Paige, you should see your face." She said in between laughs. "Clearly you were joking, I'm just messing with you. I came over to make sure our little Emily was alright. Now when will you be back to school, I miss having you there." She said directing her attention to Emily.

"Monday."

"Good, I'll bring _you _muffins." Spencer walked back over to the couch as Emily let Paige in. She gathered her things and made her way to the door. "I think you should spend time with someone your own age for a little while." She kissed Emily on the forehead again and patted her shoulder. "See you ladies."

"Bye Spencer. Hey, thanks so much for dropping by."

"Anytime. If you're having a rough day don't you hesitate to get a hold of me, you have no excuse. You have my number now, you know where I work, and where I live." She smiled at Emily and disappeared in her car.

"Holy moly, you spent the day with _Spencer_?" Paige asked teasingly.

Emily sat with Paige in the living room and talked until her mom came home. She didn't want to live without Samara, but she didn't really have a choice. At least she had Spencer in her life. Deliciously perfect Spencer.

**SOOOOO? FEEDBACK? THOUGHTS? SUGGESTIONS? COMMENTS? QUESTIONS?**


	25. Chapter 22

**A TON OF YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE! I'M SOOOO EXCITED FOR YOU TO READ. (NOT SPEMILY JUST YET, TOO SOON)**

**MAY I JUST SAY HOW MUCH YOUR FEEDBACK MEANS TO ME? IT IS SO INSPIRING AND HELPS ME MOVE THE STORY ALONG (THANK YOU SO MUCH!) THE BEGINNING OF THIS CHAPTER WAS INSPIRED BY A READER CHALLENGING ME ABOUT SPENCE AND MEL'S BREAKUP, THE READER CALLED IT A "PLOTHOLE"...SINCE I DESPISE PLOT HOLES, I HOPE THIS CLEARS IT UP...**

**-MANAGEMENT**

"You didn't even try."

"It wouldn't have worked!"

"How could you know that?"

"I just do, I don't want to talk about this Aria." Spencer whined while laying on Aria's couch, with Aria hovering above her."

"Why didn't you even try to see..."

"Why are we still talking about this two months later?"

"Because Spency, you're still sleeping in my guest room. Because you're still crawling in my bed in the middle of the night. We're still talking about this because you're still hurting. Once you stop hurting we can stop talking about it. Now, tell me why you didn't give the long distance thing a try." Aria demanded as she took a seat in her recliner.

"It's really simple Aria, I don't do long distance."

"I get that, but Mel wasn't your girlfriend, she was your fiancé, you planned to spend your life with her, how could you give up so easily, why not even give it a shot?"

"It wouldn't have worked! Aria, the second she said she was staying there, I knew it was over. I know myself and better yet I know Mel, trust me, it was a disaster waiting to happen. She wasn't moving back here, I wasn't moving there. What the hell? Are we supposed to be married and live a ten-hour plane ride away from each other? My rational told me that was silly. Don't you think it's better I ended things immediately than holding on to some false hope? There's also that little green monster that lives inside of her. We probably would have argued on the phone or Skype the whole time, with her accusing me of sleeping around and or lying to her about this and that. I didn't want to go through that, I didn't see the point. This whole thing was the universe's way of telling me it wasn't right."

"But I thought..."

"Maybe it was timing, maybe we both have a lot more growing to do, maybe we'll end up together, maybe I'll never see her again, I don't know. Meilani was simply incredible and I miss her like crazy, but I'm not completely sure it was meant to be, at least not right now." Spencer said sadly.

"Okay, okay. I didn't mean to upset you. If you say you knew it wasn't right, I believe you. I'm sorry for pushing the issue."

"Things happen for a reason munchkin, the events that took place two months ago was no mistake, everything is planned, I just try to follow the signs you know?" Spencer sighed "I should go home."

"No!"

"Aria, I've hidden in your apartment since November, I think it's about time I face reality. I love you so much for taking care of me."

Aria got up and walked over to the couch, she laid on Spencer and she wrapped her arms around her as best she could. "I'll always take care of you, always."

"I leave for twenty minutes and I come back and you guys are practically making love, get a room!" Ezra boomed as he came through the door and made his way to the bedroom, causing Aria and Spencer to giggle.

X

"_Who. Is. That_?" Spencer drooled over the petite blonde. She could see her piercing blue eyes from across the lunchroom. She wore a tight black dress with a loose-fitting black shirt with white polka dots. Her stilettos extenuated her sculpted legs.

"Oh that's the guidance counselor." Ezra told her.

"I thought Miss Rose was the guidance counselor." Aria said.

"She was just filling in while she was on leave." They all looked over, the blonde was greeting fellow colleagues "Her three-year old got really sick and had to be admitted to CHOP. A few days later she passed away. Principal Wilson is her mom, she told her to take all the time she needed and her job would be waiting for her."

"That's so awful." Spencer said.

"That's not even the worse part." Ezra looked at his girlfriend and her best friend.

"What could be worse than losing your child?" Aria snapped.

"Being pregnant with you second while having to deal with the death of your first."

"Oh God..." Spencer's stomach turn into knots hearing what the strikingly beautiful woman had dealt with.

"Yeah but she's back after being gone for two years, so she must be doing better." The blonde made her way towards the table the three teachers occupied.

"Ezra, so good to see you. I see you cut your wild locks." He got up and they embraced.

"Yeah, my girlfriend wanted me too." He looked over at Aria who smiled. "Aria, this is Hanna Marin-Rivers, Hanna, this is Aria Montgomery, my girlfriend. She teaches Art, and she's an incredible artist."

"Oh stop. So nice to meet you, welcome back." Aria greeted cheerfully.

"Thank you so much Aria, it's good to be back. And who do we have here?" She asked looking at Spencer who seemed to be in a trance.

"Uh, hi, I'm Spencer, English."

"I swear she's better at it than that." Aria joked looking at her best friend ogle the guidance counselor, they all laughed.

"Well it's very nice to meet you Spencer English, if you all will excuse me, I have a ton of work to catch up on. Ezra could I steal you for a minute?"

"Sure Hanna, I'll be right back losers."

"Love you too." Aria smiled as she watched her boyfriend walk off with Hanna. She looked at Spencer and her smile faded. "She's married Spency."

"I know."

"Don't try to fuck her." Warned Aria.

"I'm not." Spencer turned crimson at Aria's words.

"You have that I'm-going-to-fuck-you face on, don't even try, we work here."

"Aria since when do I "try" to you know what anybody?"

"Since you broke up with Mel, you've been a little whore. Fucking everything in sight." Aria said in a hushed whisper. "Now don't get me wrong, I'm super proud of you recent whore-ish behavior, and even more proud you've been getting laid without the world's best wing man." She pointed to herself. "But don't you dare try to fuck our straight, married guidance counselor. I'll kick your ass."

"She was giving me the eye Aria. She wants the D."

"Spencer..."

"Alright, geez _mom_. I'll _try_ to not try."

"That's not good enough." Aria threw a pea at Spencer's head."

"Hey, is that necessary?"

"Say you won't."

"She looks like she tastes really good." Spencer said while licking her lips slowly.

"Spencer I swear..."

"I'm just fooling around, I won't even think about it."

X

**Later on the next day**

"You gonna be alright tomorrow?"

"It's just a stupid day."

"Emily..."

"What?"

"Tell me you'll be alright." Spencer and Emily were sitting in her classroom after school as they did every day since she returned. Spencer would grade papers and write up lesson plans, and Emily would do her homework. They would often sit in comfortable silence while they worked and Emily didn't want to be anywhere else in the world. Now she spent her mornings and her afternoons with her favorite teacher.

"I'm not sure I'll be alright or not Spence, tomorrow isn't here yet."

"You can ditch class if you want, skip first period. Come to school during second and hang with me, I'll mark you present. That way you can avoid all the early morning gift giving."

"You have to be the sweetest person that has ever lived." Emily said affectionately.

Spencer hung her head bashfully and smiled to herself. "I'm just trying to help Em."

"Yeah, I know. As tempting as it is to hide, I'd rather not." Emily said truthfully.

"That's progress!" Spencer said, pleasantly surprised.

"Yeah, yeah. I feel...it still feels so weird without her. Sometimes when I go to her grave to talk to her, I think she's gonna pop up and say this was all some sick joke." Spencer grabbed Emily's hand. "But here we are a month later and, it's not a joke, she's...dead. I think...I can manage, it's only Valentine's day."

"Okay, if you're sure."

"I'm not sure of anything Spence, but I'll try."

"Okay Em...finish your homework."

X

Emily was laying in her bed on her side facing away from her door. Spencer, as she did most days, dropped her off at home after a much-needed pizza run. She couldn't believe the beautiful, classy, sophisticated Spencer Hastings actually liked to hang out with her, but she wasn't complaining. Since the day Spencer surprised her at her house they have been practically attached at the hip. Emily hated weekends because she wouldn't have the escape that Spencer provides, but she managed to get through it by just staying in her room and laying in her bed. Emily no longer left the house unless it was for school, her mom stopped forcing her to go to church, telling her she was old enough to make the decision for herself. So it was school and home. She didn't hang out with Paige and Mona too much anymore either, and they gave her space. They did, however, come over to try to cheer her up or perhaps get a glimpse of the Emily they once knew, but she was clearly gone. The way she saw it, there was only two things positive in her life right now, music and Spencer. Samara's death did that, it brought her closer to Spencer and it gave her the one last push she needed to get serious about music. Alone in her room on her bed was a notebook and a pen, she would write songs for hours, especially after a good cry. She knew she had to pursue music now, she felt like she didn't have a choice. Life was too short and Samara's untimely exit from earth taught her that. Once high school was over, she was going to go to school for music, not to sing but to write and learn to produce for other artists. This was the life she wanted so it would be the life she would create for herself.

She heard her door open but she didn't turn around, she just closed her notebook and sat it on her night stand. Her mother's hand ran through her long dark locks. Emily watched her mom come over to her side of the bed and sit down. She sighed and put her hands in her face.

"Emily please, you...you're like a zombie. You go to school, come home, you don't talk to anyone anymore, you barely eat. Then you just lay in this bed. Sweetheart, you gotta start functioning again. I understand, please Emily believe me when I say I do. I...I loved her too. It's so hard knowing I'll never hear her laugh again, she'll never cook with me again, never be at my door, ringing my bell like a crazy person." She chuckled half heartedly. "It's so tough to lose someone you're so close with, I know she was your friend but..."

"She wasn't my friend." Emily said emotionless, without looking at her mother.

Pam didn't speak again for a long while, trying to figure out what her daughter meant. "Emily? What in the world are you talking about?" The irritation and hurt was crystal clear in her voice.

"You said you know she was my friend." Emily sat up on the bed and looked her mom dead in the eyes. "She wasn't just my friend. She was my girlfriend. We were together. I was head over heels in love with her and she was in love with me..."

"Emily..." Pam started as she stood up from the bed and looked at her daughter like she was a stranger.

"We talked about growing old together, about raising a family. Now she's just gone. She begged me to tell you and dad. She wanted the whole world to know how in love we were, and I was a coward, now she'll never..." Emily trailed off, not knowing how to finish.

Pam looked at her fragile daughter with wide eyes. "Are you saying..."

"Yes mom, I'm gay. And Sammy was my lover, my everything. I didn't lose a friend, I lost the girl I thought I'd spend my life with."

"How long?" All the love and compassion was no longer present in Pam's tone or demeanor. Her gaze had suddenly turned cold.

"We were together since last December, remember when her parents went on Safari? That was the first time we made love..."

"Stop it!" Pam screamed. Emily returned her gaze with an icy look of her own. Her mom said nothing else, she hurried out of the room and slammed the door behind her.

_I knew that would get her to leave me alone_. Emily mused to herself, picked up her notebook, laid down, and started a new song.

**HOW'S YOUR MIND? BLOWN?**

**I'M LITERALLY DYING TO HEAR WHAT Y'ALL HAVE TO SAY...IF YOU'VE NEVER TALKED TO ME BEFORE, AT LEAST TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS ONE. I'M OUT OF MY MIND PLEASED WITH THIS CHAPTER, KINDA LIKE I'M A READER LIKE YOU, I'M SO IN LOVE WITH THIS STORY. WE'RE ALMOST AT THE END THOUGH (AT LEAST ANOTHER 5 CHAPTERS), SPEMILY IS AROUND THE CORNER, THEN I'LL START WORKING ON PART II : )**

**TALK TO ME PEOPLE...**


	26. Chapter 23

**UPON REQUEST I WILL NOT END PART I...I HAD PLANNED ONLY A FEW MORE CHAPTERS, I'LL GIVE YOU MORE...ONCE AGAIN I'VE BEEN CHALLENGED ABOUT MEL & SPENCE'S BREAKUP SOOOO...**

**ALSO IT'S BEEN BROUGHT TO MY ATTENTION THAT THE S/O FENDER18 GAVE ME IN HER STORY IS THE CAUSE FOR MOST OF YOU READERS/FAVS/FOLLOWS ETC. AND HERE I WAS THINKING IT WAS MY AWESOMENESS : (**

**KUDOS TO YOU FOR BRINGING ME ALL THESE LOVELY READERS...PLEASE FENDER18 ENJOY THIS INCREDIBLY LONG CHAPTER, IT'S FOR YOU**

Two days before Valentine's day, Spencer had seen one of the most attractive women she had ever laid eyes on. It was pretty confusing to her since she wasn't normally attracted to fair-skinned woman. She preferred women like Meilani with her natural tan, or Maya with her caramel skin. If she was being honest with herself, she thought Emily was ridiculously gorgeous, and if she wasn't her student, she'd be just her type. Dark hair, dark eyes, golden skin. But this woman was an all American blonde, Spencer didn't go for white women, and she definitely didn't like blondes. If she went after a Caucasian woman, chances were she had dark hair, she just wasn't particularly attracted to blonde haired women. But this blonde was on another level completely. And with the little interactions she had with her over the past month, she found out Hanna was unbelievably sweet. She kept her distance though because, even though she told Aria she was joking, she truly did want to find out what Hanna Marin-Rivers tasted like. She avoided her at all cost, but there isn't much one can do when your crush shows up at your door.

It was Spencer's twenty-fourth birthday and Emily wasn't in her normal chair by her desk. She had told Spencer she was going to spend much of her morning with Sammy at her grave. So Spencer was all alone when she heard a knock on her door.

"Come in."

"Good morning Miss Spencer English." Hanna called Spencer this since Spencer could barely talk when they met and called herself "English". Hanna looked stunning as usual in a pair of light grey slacks and a light blue dress shirt with a white collar. The color of the shirt made her eyes sparkle even more. Yeah, Spencer had it bad for a woman who was the exact opposite of her "type". She was carrying what had to be twenty balloons, all of them saying happy birthday, and a bouquet of white lilies. "A little birdie told me it was your birthday so I thought I'd get you a little something." She released the balloons and handed Spencer the flowers."

"My goodness Hanna, you didn't have to. That's just...you're too kind for words."

"Well honestly I thought you deserved a little special attention."

"Yeah? Why's that?" Spencer asked as she sat her flowers down.

"I've had regular meetings with kids who were affected by the unfortunate vehicle death of Samara Cook, one Emily Fields in particular."

"You've been talking to Em? She didn't tell me that."

"Well _it is_ confidential" Hanna winked at Spencer and she almost lost her balance, standing in front of Hanna was pure torture. "But I will say this, you have handled Emily exceptionally well, I've never known a teacher to be so involved and caring towards a student. I'm very impressed." Hanna looked up at the balloons. "It's just some balloons and flowers, but it's the thought that counts right Miss English?" She smiled and Spencer once again found it difficult to stand so she took a seat."

"Yes Hanna the thought was sweet and a pleasant surprise, thank you very much."

"Thank you for being such a fantastic teacher and clearly a wonderful person." She moved behind Spencer's desk and lean on it right in front of her. The proximity made Spencer swallow the imaginary lump in her throat. "I really don't know what kind of shape that young lady would be in if it weren't for you, so thank you. We're lucky to have you here a Rosewood."

"Um...thank you, I mean, it's my pleasure to teach these kids. Being there for such a special girl like Emily, it's just an added bonus."

"Are you doing anything tonight?"

"Uh, no, not really. Aria's cooking me dinner like she does every year, but other than that no."

"Why don't you let me take you out for after dinner drinks later than? My treat."

Spencer thought long and hard about Hanna's offer. She wasn't sure she could continue to control herself while they were in her classroom. She was certain she wouldn't be able to keep her hands to herself if they were alone, in a bar, with alcohol in her system. _Screw it_. She thought.

"Uh, well, if you're buying, I'm drinking. I have to warn you though, I'm a fish so drinks could get pretty pricey."

"A fish?" Hanna asked with a wide smile, clearly amused.

"Yeah I'm a Pisces, we're fish and we drink...a lot. Our tolerance is higher than any other zodiac sign."

Hanna laughed a beautiful melodic laugh. "Well I'm a Virgo, I don't know what animal I am, but my alcohol tolerance is probably higher than yours."

"A virgin."

"Excuse me Miss English?"

"A virgin, the Virgo is a virgin woman."

Hanna laughed again. "Hmmm, I'm far from a virgin. Aren't virginal women suppose to be sweet, pure, and innocent? I'm none of those, and I can drink anyone under the table, including you Miss English."

"Wanna bet?" Spencer challenged.

"What do I win?"

"You're assuming you're gonna win? Funny. When I win, you have to be my slave for a week. You have to do whatever I say and can't complain no matter how ridiculous the request."

"Fine, so _when_ I win, you'll be my slave for a week? Great, I like that idea."

"Whatever. You got yourself a bet, what's your number." Spencer pulled out her phone and let Hanna save her number.

"Hey, so I'm not misreading anything here, you're into women right?" Spencer simply nodded. They shook on the bet and Hanna left. Spencer knew she wouldn't be able to keep her promise to Aria, not anymore.

X

Spencer and Emily sat in the same Cold Stone Creamery she and Meilani frequented during happier times. There weren't many people in the store seeing how it was the middle of winter, but Emily and Spencer couldn't have been more content sharing an ice cream cake.

"March 14th should be a holiday or something." Spencer said.

"Why?"

"Do you know how many awesome people were born today?" Emily shook her head. "Well let's start with the obvious, you and me. Stephen Curry, Albert Einstein, Billy Crystal, oh, Quincy Jones, that man is a legend!" Spencer said with glee. Emily just shrugged and continued to eat her cake. "How's it feel to be sixteen?"

"Like it felt to be fifteen not twenty-four hours ago."

"What's wrong Em? Are you sad because of Sammy?" Spencer asked.

"A little, but it was nice to be with her this morning. And by that I mean sit and talk to her tombstone like a crazy person."

"Hey," Spencer took Emily's hand. "If it makes you feel better or closer to her, then you shouldn't belittle that. Plenty of people visit gravesites of loved ones, it's comforting."

"I guess...I told my mom I'm gay a few days ago."

Spencer paused for a moment wondering if she heard her correctly. "You what?" She asked in a monotone.

"I came out to my mom."

"Wow, I...how'd that go? What made you do it?"

"She was getting on my nerves."

"I'm not following Em." Spencer shook her head.

"She was getting on my last nerve talking about how I need to start functioning again and do this and do that, and stop being in my room all the time. I'm sick of her. So...I told her I was gay to leave me alone."

"Um..." Spencer couldn't really digest what Emily was telling her. "Well, uh, how'd uh, what she say?"

"She was pissed." Emily snickered. "It was perfect. I was kinda a dick about it though."

"How so?" Spencer was growing perturbed.

"I just gave her way too many details, like how in love we were and how we were gonna start a family, oh, and I told her about the first time we made love. Her face was priceless." Emily was full on laughing at that point."

"Stop laughing!" Spencer sneered causing the employees and two other customers to look in their direction. "This isn't funny, what the hell is wrong with you?! When you come out, you wanna do it with ease, with grace, so hopefully there won't be much fallout. Especially with a religious mother like yours! You shouldn't have done that and this isn't a damn joke!" Spencer reprimanded, sharply.

Emily's face fell and tears began to pool in her eyes, once Spencer saw she had almost brought the girl to tears, she changed her tone completely. "Shit, I mean shoot, I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have raised my voice. I just need you to understand the seriousness of what you did. That was pretty foul Em."

"I know."

"How has it been around the house?" She was now concerned more than anything.

"I've barely seen her, and when she is there she won't look at me."

"But that's what you wanted, wasn't it?"

"Yeah."

"Emily, what in the world made you tell her now? Seriously, _after _Sammy was already gone...it couldn't have been just to get her off your case."

"Honestly Spence, I felt like such an idiot for never telling everyone, including my mom, that Sammy and I were in love. Sammy wanted my mom's approval so bad, she loved my mom like so so so much, they were butt buddies. She just wanted my mom to accept us and to know how in love she was with me. She begged me literally all the time to tell them, but I was always too afraid. So when my mom started saying how she understood because they were close too, I had to let her know, she could never understand unless my dad was killed. Then she'd know, she'd know my fucking pain." Emily let a few tears fall before wiping them quickly.

"Em...eat your cake. I need to process what you've just told me before I can be of any help. Chances are you're gonna need a lot of it to smooth things over with Mrs. Fields." Spencer phone rang and it was the last number she'd thought she'd see.

"Who is it Spence?"

"Mel."

Emily froze for a moment, she felt like a tank just ran over her heart, she didn't want Spencer's ex fiancé to be calling her. She didn't like having her birthday with her favorite person, alive, to be interrupted, especially not by her. "Don't answer that." Emily said firmly before she could stop it from flying out of her mouth.

"I...I have to, something could be wrong." Emily rolled her eyes as Spencer pressed accept.

"Hello?"

"Nani."

"Mel."

"How are you?"

"Well, and you?"

"I've been better."

"Oh God what's wrong?" Spencer heart started to race a mile a minute.

"Nothing exactly, just been burying myself in work trying to get over my fiancé leaving me after my mother passed away suddenly. It's been a rough four months." Meilani paused. "I'm sorry, that was a low blow."

"Yes, it was." Spencer said quietly.

"Um, I really just called to say happy birthday, not to make you feel bad, I swear."

"Uh, thanks."

"Nani?"

"Yes?"

"I've been trying here, but I don't think I can do it."

"Do what?" Spencer asked suspiciously.

"Continue life without you being by my side, I'm trying and I'm failing miserably. I don't do anything but work because it's the only thing that keeps my mind off you. But I can't just work twenty-four seven."

"What do you expect me to say Meilani?"

Meilani sighed deeply. "Nothing I suppose. I didn't mean to be a bother, I just had to give it another..." She fell silent. "Happy birthday Spencer." She hung up.

Spencer hadn't realized she'd stopped breathing until oxygen inhabited her lungs again. She looked across the table at Emily who had sort of a smug grin dancing on her lips.

"I told you don't answer it." She shook her head and finished her cake.

X

After an amazing early dinner with Aria, and shaking off Meilani's unexpected call, Spencer was dressed to impress for her night out with Hanna. It was a school night but tomorrow's Friday which is her movie day, so she wasn't worried. She knew she couldn't get too drunk, but planned on having a good time. She couldn't stop thinking about the motivation behind Hanna asking if she were into women. Hanna was a straight, married woman with a toddler at home, why did it matter. She shook those thoughts off and gave herself the once over in the mirror. Hanna told her casual so she wore her black studded leather jacket over a white v neck long-sleeved shirt. Black skinny jeans and fire red pumps. Just as she finish applying her last touch of mascara, Hanna texted to say she was downstairs. Hanna took her breath away as soon as she walked out of her building, she was standing by a taxi with her long blonde hair in messy waves. She wore a navy blue combat jacket which was unzipped revealing her light blue jean shirt. Her jeans matched perfectly and she had on nude pumps, she looked good enough to eat. As Spencer got closer, she saw the smokey eye makeup she wore which only made her clear blues eyes pop.

"Hey slave." Hanna said playfully as she gave Spencer a hug.

"Don't get ahead of yourself."

"Yeah, yeah whatever slave, get in."

"Why are we in a cab?" Spencer asked once they were both seated comfortably.  
"Cause I'm getting wasted and so are you, someone had to be the designated driver." Hanna said, laughing.

"Oh...good move."

X

"One more s-shot birthday girl." Hanna slurred as she poured more tequila in Spencer's shot glass.

"Hanna, I can't." Spencer said in almost a whisper.

"What was that?"

"I can't!" Spencer shouted and Hanna clapped her hands. She threw back her shot.

"Okay so since I'm clearly less drunk than you are and you j-just denied to drink another shot, I win."

"Yeah, whatever, you win."

"What was that?"

"You heard me."

"I can't believe the all mighty fish didn't stand a chance against the virgin." Hanna teased. She asked the bartender for a water to give to Spencer and called them a cab. When they arrived back at Spencer's, Hanna paid the fare and walked Spencer to her apartment.

"You got any bananas?" She asked once Spencer managed to get the door open.

"Yeah, on t-top of the uh, the uh..."

"The fridge? I see them." She laughed and took her jacket off, throwing it over a chair.

"Why do need one?" Spencer slurred.

"Here eat it, it'll sober you up, and you won't have a hangover in the morning."

"Oh." Spencer grabbed the fruit and struggled to peel it. After watching her and laughing, Hanna finally helped. "How are you g-gonna get home?"

"I have some clothes in my giant pocketbook here, is it alright if I stay?"

"Sure...what time is it?"

"Uh..." Hanna sat on the couch and Spencer joined her, she went in her purse to fish out her phone. "It's only a little past midnight.

"Oh, that's not that bad." Spencer said feeling a little less drunk. "Don't you want a banana too?"

"I want something else in my mouth slave."

Spencer perked up at the possible implication. Hanna seized the moment to inch near Spencer, in an instant, she connected their lips. Spencer pulled Hanna off her.

"Hanna, what are you doing, you're married."

"And you're my slave, wasn't that the bet?"

"Yeah but..."

"But nothing, I see the way you look at me, I'm not blind Spencer."

"Han..." Before she could continue to protest again, Hanna pressed their lips together. Spencer slid back to the arm of the couch and pulled Hanna on top of her. Hanna helped Spencer out of her jacket and tossed it on the coffee table. Spencer ripped open Hanna's shirt and attacked her neck and chest, placing sloppy kisses everywhere eagerly. She roughly grabbed Hanna's breast while she sucked on her neck. Hanna's moans only fueled Spencer to start biting. She removed Hanna's bra and started to circle her nipple with her tongue. Hanna abruptly pushed Spencer down, and sat up.

"You have a strap on slave?"

Spencer averted her eyes. "Yes, why."

"Because I want you to fuck me with it silly. And you better fuck the shit out of me, you're young, you should have tons of energy." Hanna pulled Spencer's shirt over her head, she bent down and sucked on her neck. Spencer hadn't felt this good in months. Even with all the casual sex she was having, she wasn't exactly having fun, Hanna was loads of fun. "Plus, you're my sex slave for the next seven days, so you have to do whatever I want you to do, wherever. Got it?"

"Got it." Spencer held Hanna tight as she got up from the couch, she carried her into her room and threw her on the bed. She went in her closet to get the strap she hadn't used in who knows how long. She tore the rest of her clothes off, put on the toy and went back into the room. Hanna was already completely naked with her legs spread wide on the bed and her hand in between her legs. The small circles she was making elicited the sexiest moans Spencer had ever heard. She hurried over to the side of her bed and ripped open her dresser drawer, looking for a condom. When she found it, she rolled it on and hopped on the bed.

"Damn, you couldn't wait for me?" She asked, staring at Hanna pleasing herself.

"Mmmm, just tryna get warmed up."

"This is this is the hottest thing I've ever seen.

"Yeah? How long have you been wanting to fuck me?"

"Since the second I saw you." Spencer replied without taking her eyes off Hanna's center.

"Mmmm, really?" Spencer nodded her head. "You wanna taste me?"

"Fuck yes, I mean..."

Hanna giggled. "Come eat then."

X

Spencer woke up groggy and sore, but minus a hangover. She instantly got nervous feeling a body wrapped around hers. In all the one night stands she had since her and Meilani broke up, she never brought one home. She wondered how she could have got so drunk, then wondered where Hanna was. After blinking multiple times to focus her vision, she pulled away from the body beside her. There she was, Hanna, the woman she'd been dreaming about sleeping with for the last month. In her bed. Naked. Spencer was thrilled but upset she couldn't remember a thing. Her clock read 5:47am. She shook Hanna awake.

"Hanna. we gotta get ready for school in a bit."

Hanna groaned. "Ugh, let's hooky."

"I can't today is Friday."

"Exactly, so let's sleep all morning and fuck all afternoon slave. Did you forget you have to do what I tell you."

Spencer felt flushed hearing her words, but stood firm. "Friday's are my special day with Emily."

Hanna opened her eyes and wiped sleep out of them. "Don't you spend everyday with her?"

"Yeah...but Fridays are special. Look it's our thing okay, and I can't miss Fridays, she'd kill me."

"I guess you have two people you take orders from now, huh?" Hanna chuckled.

"Shut up. Um...what happened last night?"

"I'm offended. You don't remember? I'm so good in bed, how dare you not remember." Hanna taunted.

"Yeah well things are a little foggy."

"Okay well let's see, you ripped my shirt and popped my buttons, then you started to lick, suck, and bite all over me. Which I'm sure has left a mark."

Spencer moved Hanna's head to the right and gasped at the rather large hickey on her neck and the bite marks on the top of her breast. "Oh my goodness Hanna, I'm so sorry."

Hanna shrugged and continued. "Then we made out on the couch for a little before you picked me up. I got undressed while you got your strap on. I played with myself and when you got back you watched me. You said it was the hottest thing you had ever seen."

Hearing Hanna retell last night was turning Spencer on to know end. But she quietly listened.

"You watched me for a little while before I asked if you wanted to taste me. You over zealously devoured me. It was so fucking good, mmmm that mouth of yours. After I came in your mouth you turned me over and started eating me from behind. Out of nowhere you stopped and rammed the dildo in me. You started tearing my little pussy up, but it wasn't nothing I couldn't handle. I started throwing it back, but it was nothing _you _couldn't handle." Hanna winked. "Then you pushed me flat on the bed and got on you feet to ride me. You were fucking the shit out of me saying some of the nastiest things I ever heard. Who would have known Spencer English was and expert dirty talker? Anywho, you flipped me over on my back and by that time I had at least four orgasms."

Spencer propped herself up on her elbow and absently ran her fingers through Hanna's hair as she listen to the events that took place just hours ago.

"So you're on top of me, pounding my pussy, hard as fuck. I screamed so loud I'm surprised no one called the cops, but trust me, the neighbors know your name." Spencer burst into laughter and Hanna joined her. "So you're on top and you're all like "you love this dick don't you?" and of course I'm screaming "yes, yes, yes!" Then you're like "say my fucking name" and I started screaming your name. So you asked me if I wanted to ride your dick, to which I obviously replied fuck yes. You pulled out of me and climb up my body and told me to suck it first."

"I what?!" Spencer asked mortified at her aggressive behavior. Hanna rubbed her face and smiled. "Hanna I'm sorr..."

"Spencer, I loved it, every second. So you shoved the dildo in my face and I started to suck my juices off. You told me that was the _second_ hottest thing you'd ever seen. You start fucking my mouth and I almost came." Hanna bit her lip and moaned at the memory. "Then you got on your back and I rode you like a champion. We fucked for hours, we just finished only a couple of hours ago." She said looking at Spencer's alarm clock. "You're amazing, and you aren't too bad in bed either."

At that moment Spencer knew she was in a world of trouble. She felt like she was in quicksand, unable to stop the sinking. The fact of the matter was, she liked this woman, this married woman. It was wrong to have slept with her, but the deed was done.

"You have a very vivid way of telling stories."

"I try."

"Hanna, I know it's a little bit too late to be asking but what about your husband..."

"Oh, him. He lets me do what I want. The truth is Spencer he and I haven't been intimate since Lizzie died. I was broken and empty and five months pregnant. I didn't want him touching me I can barely look at him to be honest."

"Why?" This was the first time Hanna had mentioned her daughter or husband, so naturally Spencer was curious.

"Because...he was grieving just like I was but I couldn't deal with his grief, the bond between a father and a child has no comparison to the bond between a mother and a child. Not to say he wasn't feeling the loss but he could never understand what I felt. I guess I resented him because I thought there was no way he could be in as much pain as me. It was selfish and stupid and it caused a major rift between us." Hanna sighed and took a deep breath. "Eventually he started sleeping in our guest bedroom. When Abigail was born and the six-weeks passed and we could have sex again I still didn't want him touching me. But I wanted to feel...something. One night I went to this bar and this married couple was checking me out, I was drunk and they were drunk and asked if I wanted to join them."

"And you did." Spencer deduced.

"Yeah, and it was awesome. But I really liked the way the wife made me feel. So I started hooking up with random women. It's been exhilarating and fun but I decided to stop sleeping around like six or seven months."

"Why me?" Spencer wondered.

"I find you to be so beautiful Spencer, not like typically beautiful, but classically beautiful. Like Sophia Loren or Audrey Hepburn. And you're graceful and kind. When I first saw you I was immediately drawn to you but we work together so I tried to keep it in check."

"What changed?"

"Emily. She talks about you all the time and the things she tells me...you're simply wonderful Spencer English. I really couldn't help myself."

Hanna smiled at Spencer and she smiled back, they almost kissed but Spencer's alarm went off. As they got ready she thought about how Emily had gotten her laid.

X

The time Emily had spent with Spencer was marred by her coming out story and Meilani's impromptu call. But they continued to talk and enjoy their ice cream cake. When Emily got home her mother wasn't there, as usual. There was a birthday card waiting on her pillow but that's it. Emily tossed the card in her nightstand drawer without opening it. Her mom hadn't said much of anything to her since she came out, and Emily was grateful. She quickly tired of her mother trying to help her feel normal again, there was no feeling normal. The knock on her door surprised her, especially since her mom hadn't bothered to come anywhere near her room lately. She figured it was because it was her birthday.

"Hey Emmy."

"Dad! Oh my God dad, what are you doing here?" Emily jumped off her bed and flung her arms around her father's neck. "Dad its a thursday don't you have to work?"

"And miss my baby's birthday? I don't think so." He hugged Emily tightly for a while before her let her go. "Let's sit down."

"Is mom here?" She asked warily.

"No, she's still at work. Um, Emmy, I came for your birthday but also because your mom asked me to come."

"For what?" Emily suddenly felt defensive, she knew why her mom called her dad.

"She told me that...you told her something. It really upset her. She thinks you told her with the intention of upsetting her."

"I did, that was exactly my intention."

"So it's not true?" Wayne asked looking relieved.

"No, it's very true. It's the most true thing about me. Sammy and I were in love. When she died, I didn't lose a friend, I lost my girlfriend." A single tear left her eye before she could wipe it.

"Oh." Wayne stood up and walked over to Emily's dresser where he stood still and silent for what felt like forever. "Okay. Um...so you're...gay?"

"Yes. And mom is handling it like a trooper." Emily said sarcastically.

"Emmy, you have to give her time, she wasn't even sure if what you told her was the truth or not. She thought yo were trying to hurt her."

"Hurt her?! So she's in pain because I'm gay?!" Rage was bubbling inside of her.

"Emmy calm down. It's not...it's not an easy thing to find out about your child."

"So you hate me now too?"

"Of course not, and neither does your mother. We're just shocked."

"Speak for yourself Wayne." Pam said from the doorway.

"Look!" Emily said as she stood up from her bed. "I don't need this, it's my birthday!"

"Emily, do not raise your voice to you mother or me. Sit down. Pam let's talk about this."

"What is there to talk about? So this is true huh, you were with Sammy...in that way, for over a year?"

"Isn't that what I told you?"

"Emily..." Wayne warned.

"Did you have sex in my house?"

"Yep, tons of it."

"Emily!" Wayne wasn't pleased with his daughter's behavior in the least bit. "Cut that out right this instant."

"Would it have been better if I was screwing a guy? Would that make you happy mom?"

Her mom looked like she was about to pass out. "Emily, you're not who I thought you were, in fact I don't know you at all. You're disgusting."

"Pam, why would you say something like that?" Emily watched her father close in on Pam, she was stuck after hearing what her mom really thinks about her. "Don't say things like that, she's still our little girl."

"She's a sinner Wayne, she was having sex with a girl, and she's telling us she's gay? That's disgusting and it's wrong and she's going to burn in hell."

"Pam!"

"Are you okay with this?" Pam grilled her husband.

"I'm not thrilled, but she's my daughter and she's still the same person she was before you called me. Who are you to say she's going to hell?"

"Because it's true. You think I want my daughter to live a life like this, and to know she's going to burn in hell?"

Emily stood up and wedged herself between her mom and dad. She was much taller than her mother so she looked down at her with fire in her eyes. "Fuck you." She said as cold and menacing as she could, then ran down the stairs and out the door.

X

"It's so messed up, I know. But now you see why I didn't want to tell them, well her." Emily said while leaning on Samara's granite headstone. "I wish you were here Sammy, you have like no clue how much I need you. You promised...you promised you'd never leave me Sammy!" Emily began to weep.

"Emily?"

She jumped. "What do you want? Here to disrespect the dead?"

"Of course not, I would never."

"Well you've been disrespecting me, can't imagine what you think about her." Emily said throwing her thumb over her shoulder to Samara's grave.

"Emily, I loved Sammy...so so much." Pam took a seat next to her daughter. "Hearing that you two were...involved, doesn't diminish my love for her."

"Just for me right?"

"I deserve that. But what I didn't deserve were those foul words you said to me before you ran out the house. I shouldn't have said the things I was saying, but don't ever speak to me like that again."

"Whatever."

"Em, after not knowing where you were for all these hours and driving around talking to your dad, I realized how wrong I was. I'm very sorry. This is your life and you may live it the way you choose. I don't like it, but I...I'm not going to judge you anymore. That's what I was doing and I'm very very sorry. It's not my place to say who gets into heaven or not. Plus your dad read some scriptures to me to knock me down a few pegs, can't argue with the Bible. I've asked God to forgive me for my vile behavior and I hope you can too. You're my daughter and who you love...it has nothing to do with that. I'm sorry. I love you so much sweetheart."

Emily knocked the wind out of Pam when she crashed into her body for a bone crushing hug.

X

"So...your husband." Spencer started as she waked Hanna to her office.

"What about him?"

"Have y'all worked on your relationship?"

"We don't want Abby to grow up in a broken home so until she's old enough we'll stay there together. After that I don't know, but we haven't been husband and wife for a very long time."

"Oh. So...uh Pastor Ted, he's not your dad right?" Spencer asked, changing the subject.

"No, he and my mom got married years after she and my dad got divorced."

"Oh. Okay."

"Anything else you wanna ask detective?"

"I'm sorry." Spencer flushed in embarrassment.

"It's okay, you're trying to find out about me...I like it. Walk me in?" Hanna pointed to her office door. Hanna closed the door behind Spencer and slowly pushed their bodies together until Spencer hit the door. "How about a quicky slave?" Hanna placed a soft kiss on Spencer's lips. Their tongues met and the kiss deepened. Hanna pulled Spencer as she walked backwards to her desk, which she hopped on. She put her legs around Spencer's waist bringing her closer. Her hands went up Spencer's shirt as she moaned at the feeling of her lips on hers.

"You're a good kisser." Spencer breath against her mouth.

"Likewise Ms. English. Now take your pants off and sit in my chair so I can taste you." She kissed Spencer again, but she reluctantly pulled away.

"As much as I would love that, I have to get to Emily. I'm already late." She kissed her again, this time Hanna broke the kiss.

"What does that Emily have on you?"

"Nothing." Spencer said innocently.

"She's got some type of hold on you." Hanna said narrowing her eyes at Spencer.

"Okay well...as inappropriate as it is, she's my friend." She admitted. "She's an awesome kid, and crazy mature for her age, I feel like I can talk to her about anything. And...she's my friend." She repeated. "She's had a rough few months and I'm just trying to be there for her."

"Spencer, your kindness is so rare." Hanna kissed her again, this time more tender. Spencer noticed the difference. "I guess I'll let you off the hook this one time, but you have to come back at lunch, I'm sure you'll be a remarkable meal."

"If you don't stop talking like that Emily is gonna wring my neck cause I won't make it." The next kiss lasted another five minutes before they could tear themselves apart. Spencer unwillingly left Hanna's office. Emily was waiting outside her door.

"You're never late Spence."

"I know. I'm sorry sweetie, I had a little too much fun for my birthday."

"No such thing as too much fun."

"If you say so." Spencer opened her door while smiling to herself. "How was the rest of your special day?"

"Ugh."

"What's wrong?" Spencer asked with more panic than she intended. Emily told her of the evening she had and although the story started out less than favorable, Spencer was glad to hear how it ended. "Well that's a start."

"I suppose." Emily hung her head.

"You know what you need?"

"What?"

"A hug!" She scooped Emily into her arms and her feet dangled until Spencer put her down. She didn't let go, she held her for a while as Emily rested her head on her favorite teacher's shoulder. Her deliciously perfect teacher. For the first time in almost a year, Emily wished she could do more than hug Spencer.

**FEEDBACK? THOUGHTS? QUESTIONS?**

**OKAY SO THIS CHAPTER IS OVER 6000 WORDS, THAT'S THREE CHAPTERS IN ONE SOOOO BE PATIENT FOR THE NEXT ONE.**

**Guest 7/9/13 . chapter 26**

**HOW DARE YOU LEAVE IT THERE. DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE BECAUSE IM NOT A PERSON WHO LIKES WAITING OK IM GONNA BE LAYING IN MY BED FOR DAYS WAITING FOR AN UPDATE CRYING**

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**SORRY I KEPT YOU WAITING...DON'T CRY**


	27. Chapter 24

**I'M FRUSTRATED...**

**YOU'RE NOT GOING TO ENJOY THAT...**

**SMUT IN THIS ONE...**

Aria walked into Spencer's apartment around noon on Saturday. Her face told Spencer something was very wrong. Aria stood in front of her scowling. Spencer knew her well enough to know she was in big trouble. She tried to wrack her brain for something she may have done wrong, but she came up empty.

"Munchkin, what's wrong?"

"Don't munchkin me."

_Uh oh_, Spencer thought. "Aria..."

"Are you fucking Emily Fields?"

That threw her for a loop. "What!? Why the hell would you ask me something like that?!"

"Just answer the question Spencer!"

"I can not believe I even have to answer this...of course I'm not having sex with my sixteen year old student!"

"How do I know you aren't lying to me?" Aria was fuming. Just the thought of Spencer possibly keeping anything from her was enough to throw her into a fit of rage.

"I'm not!" Spencer yelled, clearly offended by her best friend's outlandish accusation. "What the hell Aria? You really think I would do that?"

"I'm not here to judge you." Her tone and disposition transformed completely. "A blind man could see Emily is hot as fuck, and she's madly in love with you. I wouldn't blame you if you lost the moral battle of sleeping with a student. I would however be really pissed if you were holding out details though. I mean that's hot. Student, teacher."

"Aria, you're gross."

"Nothing new there. So spill it!"

Her frustration was growing. "I'm not having sex with Emily." Spencer said through her teeth.

"And you have no feelings for her?"

"No! And she's not _madly in love_ as you put it."

"Once again, a blind man can see that." She studied Spencer's expression. "Shit, I thought you knew." Aria said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"There's nothing to know, where are you coming up with this crap? Emily is my friend. She's my student yes, but she's my friend. Have we grown rather close? Yeah. Maybe that's what you're picking up on, nothing more nothing less." Spencer said as evenly as she could.

"Wow, you really are clueless. I'm getting this "crap" from what I saw yesterday. I just didn't say anything because I was too pissed to think you might be keeping something else from me, like you did with that filthy bitch Maya."

"What are you talking about? What did you see yesterday?" Asked Spencer, ignoring the dig about Maya.

Aria sat on the couch. "So you know my students are putting art around the school for an exhibition type of project. Yesterday morning I had to come to work early to set a few things up. Since you're always at work earlier than any human should be, I thought I'd come see you. When I got to your door I saw you and Emily talking, it looked serious so I contemplated knocking or just walking away. Something made me stand there and watch, next thing I know she's off the ground in your arms. Then when you put her down you just held each other. She had her head on your shoulder facing me, but her eyes were closed. The look on her face, it looked like contentment. Like there was no place else in the world she'd rather be than in your arms. When you pulled away, she didn't try to hide the look from you, and when I looked at your face, I saw the same thing. You looked at her like she was your prize or something, and like you didn't exactly want to let her go. Plus you're always spending loads of time with her."

Spencer thought carefully about what Aria told her she saw. No one knew Spencer better than Aria, and Spencer knew she should consider what she was being told. If Aria had seen something on her face that she didn't know was there, it could be very well the truth. Spencer didn't want to think about having feelings for Emily. That would complicate her life. Did Emily have feelings for her? It wasn't like she could ask her. For the first time since she met Emily, she wished she wasn't a high school student, she wished she was her age, then this would all be far less complex. It'd be easier to admit any feelings she was denying herself. None of what she was thinking or feeling mattered, because Emily was not her age and she was her student. She tried hard not to think of Emily that way, but with Aria bringing this to her attention, it was unavoidable. Suddenly Spencer became painfully aware of the feelings she was harboring.

"Aria, I really don't know what to say."

"Say you want her." Aria said matter of factly. "I saw it in your eyes Spence. I mean _it is_ kinda wrong Spency. Most of the time, the truth hurts. Just tell me the truth."

"I...I never thought about it." She said truthfully.

"Well just a minute ago I saw the wheels churning in your head, you were just thinking about it then weren't you?"

Spencer furrowed her brow. "She's my student."

"And if she wasn't?"

"That doesn't matter, she is."

"Aha! So you do want to bone her!"

"It's not that cut and dry Aria."

"I bet it's never _dry _around Emily is it?"

Spencer wanted to laugh, but she was too shaken up over what she was revealing to herself. Her underlying, surreptitious feelings for her student. Something she's kept tucked away longer than she cared to remember.

"Aria..." Spencer groaned.

"Sorry. So what are you gonna do? You gonna fuck her on your desk?"

"Aria!"

"What, she totally wants it."

"Stop it and be serious here for a minute."

"Okay, okay. Sorry Spency. So..."

"I guess I should stop spending so much time with her."

"If that's what you think is best."

"Aria?"

"Yes?"

"In the spirit of us not keeping secrets from each other...I had sex with Hanna on my birthday. And yesterday at lunch, and last night in the back of her car. And this morning, but it was only a quicky, she had to take her little girl to mommy and me class. Before you go off on me, she got me drunk and begged for it. Also I'm kinda her sex slave until thursday. And she's not exactly with her husband anymore, at least that's what she's telling me." Spencer rushed out.

Aria took a moment to process. "Okay...give me all the dirty details, and don't you _dare_ leave anything out."

X

Monday morning Spencer prepared herself for a conversation she truly didn't want to have. When Emily walked in, she noticed Spencer's awkward demeanor. She asked what was wrong but all Spencer did was ask her to take a seat at a desk. Spencer stood in front of the desk looking at Emily as she patiently waited for Spencer to talk. She started pacing back and forth, thinking of how to explain to Emily what needed to be explained. Spencer was conflicted and pained, but knew she was doing the right thing, for everyone.

"Emily, have you ever seen the movie Antwone Fisher?"

"Yes."

"Did you like it?"

"It was terrific, why?"

"Do you remember the part when he told him their sessions were over?"

"Yes, her gave him that book and he got all upset in the bathroom. He told him about his best friend and stuff, I remember. Why?"

"Did you understand why he ended their sessions?"

"Not really, I was always confused by that part. I'm not sure I understand your line of questioning at the moment. So..."

"He ended their sessions so Antwone could stand on his own two feet. He ended them so he could grow on his own. I'm afraid I'm going to have to do the same thing."

"I still don't understand." Emily said, clearly confused.

"Emily, since Sammy's death, you've been a shell of your former self. You've hidden here and have been leaning on me like a crutch. While I don't mind being used by you, it's time you stop. We won't be spending our mornings and afternoons together anymore. You can still come on Fridays, but that's it."

"Why?" Emily's voice was full of so much hurt, Spencer almost lost her resolve.

"Because you need to be stronger, you need to face your life again. In the morning if you're here early, you should go to the music room. After school, you should go home, or hang out with your friends. I can't be the only person you communicate with, not anymore. It's time you start being yourself again. Death is hard, especially at your age and especially in the sudden, unexpected manner you had to deal with, but life goes on. You've woken up every day since Sammy's death and you haven't lived one of them. I'm putting a stop to that this instant. You're stronger than you think Emily, you don't need me to be your crutch anymore."

Emily got out of her seat but left her book bag, she raced towards the door. Spencer caught her by her forearm

"Em, where are you going?"

"You're leaving me! Just like her!"

Spencer felt more pain because of Emily's words than she cared to admit. "I'm not leaving you, I'm not going anywhere! How could you say that to me?" She was definitely hurt. "Did you not hear anything I just said?! I care so much about you Em, I just want you to be better! Look in the mirror, you aren't getting better, you're stagnant and I won't allow it anymore!"

Emily ripped her arm away and ran out the door. She re-entered right when the first period late bell rung. She picked up her book bag, which Spencer moved behind her own desk, and sat in her assigned seat. Emily did her class work without participating and without looking at Spencer once. Seconds before the bell could ring, she was halfway out the door. Spencer didn't see her around school for the rest of the day, not even at lunch. The next day was exactly the same. She made it to class just on time and was out her the door three seconds before the bell rung. On Thursday Spencer tried to ask her to stay, but Emily mumbled something about the bathroom. On Friday, Emily didn't show up for their special breakfast. It was the first Friday in a long time that Emily had missed. Spencer decided to let Emily be mad at her, even though it stung. She noticed her socializing with Paige and Mona again, and she was smiling more.

Once Spencer noticed Emily had stop skipping lunch a week after their argument, she started spending her lunch hour in Hanna's office. They would have sex and try to be as quiet as possible, which proved a daunting task for Hanna. One day that week Hanna inquired about Emily no longer coming in to speak. Spencer told Hanna about their argument and Emily's subsequent behavior. Hanna told her she was proud of her for pushing Emily, but could tell Spencer was saddened by Emily's refusal to speak to her. Hanna attempted to make her feel better which caused Spencer to walk into her next class late, but with a smile. Spencer tried to tell herself it was just sex, that Hanna is married, even if her and her husband don't sleep in the same bed. But Spencer liked Hanna, a lot. Hanna, on more than one occasion, told Spencer just how much she liked her, but Spencer stayed tight-lipped. She didn't want to reveal her feelings because she knew the possibility of her being crushed was large. Spencer missed Emily though, and she was devastated that Emily barely talked to her for the rest of the school year. She knew she hurt Emily's feelings, but she thought Emily's reaction was juvenile. The last three months of school was the only time Spencer had ever looked at Emily like she was a child.

X

With Hanna's legs secured tightly around her waist, Spencer had her pinned against her front door. They were kissing with fever as their hands roamed about their bodies. It was the fourth to last day of school and they'd been having as much sex as possible since her birthday. Any moment of time they could steal was a moment they were wholly wrapped up in one another. The sex was incredible, Spencer thought it got better each time. Hanna had her hands in Spencer's long locks when Spencer lowered her feet to the ground. They started removing their clothes while staying planted on the door.

She stepped back. "Tell me what you want me to do to you." Spencer said after all her clothes vanished.

"Mmmm...okay. First things first, I want you to eat my pussy." Hanna, also now naked, slipped her hand in between her legs. She pulled it up and put her fingers to Spencer's mouth. Spencer slowly licked them. "After I come in your mouth, I want you to sit on my face."

"Then?" Spencer loved the way Hanna talked dirty. Sometimes it was all she could do to not rush into her office when she sent her nasty texts. She had to learn to ignore her phone during school hours.

"Then you're gonna ride my face while I smack your ass and make you come down my throat. Then I want to lick you clean."

"Then?" Spencer backed up a little more.

"I want you to put that big dick of yours in my mouth. I want you to choke me with it."

"You want me to fuck your dirty little mouth?" Spencer licked her lips.

"Yes, please, fuck it hard, I wanna swallow it, get it nice and wet. Then I wanna ride your dick. I want you to push inside of me and fill me up, like only you can."

Spencer found something so erotic about not touching Hanna while she told her all the things she wanted. They stood about a foot apart now, just watching each other's arousal grow, this was the ultimate foreplay. "So you're riding my dick, then?"

"You're gonna pull out and stuff your dick back in my mouth so I can taste myself. Then I want you to turn me on my stomach. When you put your dick in, don't be gentle, ram it. Then pound my pussy, hard. Pull my hair, and don't forget to smack my ass, you know I love that shit. When you're done, I'll get on all fours and you'll eat my pussy again until I come. Then I'll get on my back, I want you to choke me while you pound my pussy with your big tasty dick."

Spencer couldn't take it anymore. If she stood at her door for one second longer, she would have exploded without Hanna so much as touching her. Spencer grabbed Hanna in her arms and carried her to the bedroom. She did everything Hanna wanted and more for the rest of the evening.

X

"Caleb asked about you." Hanna said out of nowhere. She was laying half way on top of Spencer. Her arm draped on Spencer's stomach and Spencer had both her arms holding Hanna tight.

"Oh?"

"Yeah." Hanna said somberly.

"What did he want to know?" They didn't talk about Hanna's husband too much, only when Hanna needed to. So Spencer was there for her, lending her an ear when necessary.

"Abby, she told him about Ms. English." Initially, she hated the nickname Hanna used for her more often than not. But as the months passed, she grew to love it. Especially when Hanna's almost two-year old daughter started calling her that too. Spencer didn't want to meet Abigail, she thought that was crossing a line. One Saturday afternoon Hanna invited her to spend time with the two of them at the park. Spencer refused but Hanna sent a picture of her and her daughter pouting, the little girl was too adorable to say no to. Ever since that day, she spent more and more time with Abigail, she adored her and Abigail clearly felt the same way.

"What did she tell him?"

"She told him about how you were the tallest woman alive, and your smile was perfect, like the sun, her exact words. She said that she loved when you chased her around and how you never got tired like mommy does. She told him about when you two were pretending to be airplanes after we got ice cream the other day." She paused, Spencer could tell she was sad. She instinctively held Hanna tighter. "She talks about you to me all the time. She's always asking when she can see you or if you could come to something when we're going out. So...we took her to the movies the other day, together, you know like a family. She asked if Ms. English can come too. It was the first time she mentioned you in front of him."

"Did he...was he mad or? How did he react?" Spencer knew their situation was messy, and that she was only making it more difficult. But she couldn't stop what she was having with Hanna, not even if she wanted to.

"He gave me this look then he asked who that was. So she went on and on about you the entire ride to the theater. He just listened and occasionally asked a question. He didn't say anything else, we watched the movie then headed home. She was asleep before we even buckled her car seat. We drove home in a super uncomfortable silence."

"I thought he knew...of your, uh, extra curricular activities."

"He does, but I've never brought any of them around Abby. And I certainly never stuck with someone this long. It's always been like "wham bam thank you ma'am, I'll probably never call you again". I think that's what helps him deal with it, the fact that whoever I mess with never means anything to me."

"And now?" She asked although she was already very much aware of Hanna's feelings.

"Don't play dumb Spencer. You're everything." She nuzzled a little more on Spencer's chest. "So we get home and he put her to bed. I heard him pacing in his office for like an hour, then he comes barging in my room. He told me he knew I had something with someone, he just didn't want to believe it. Then he interrogated me about you for like an hour. I didn't tell him where you work, that would be bad. Anyway after I explained my...feelings for the woman I'm seeing her started to cry. I felt like shit, I couldn't do anything but hold him. I haven't seen him cry since Lizzy's funeral."

"Damn Hanna, I'm sorry, I don't mean to cause anyone pain."

"Well...listen Spencer, it's not your fault and you know it. He uh, he...he wants to...work things out."

"Uh..."

"He want's us to see if we can be a family again. He wants us to try and if it doesn't work, get a divorce so we can both move on. I told him I'd think about it."

"He's...he's your husband Hanna, you owe him at least that much." Spencer told her despite herself. She cared deeply for Hanna but never let herself get _too _emotionally invested. That would simply be foolish.

"I suppose. I don't want this to stop Spence. I really really don't. Any what about Abby? She'll be asking for you."

"Well, you can bring her by, it's not like we'll have sex with a toddler around. It's warm out now so we can go to public places with the kid. We don't have to tempt ourselves by being here, we can still be friends Hanna."

"Is that what you want?" Her voice cracked and Spencer felt warm liquid on her chest. "You want to be just my friend."

"I would love to continue to have you in my life, in any capacity. And I love that little girl, I don't want to..." It was Spencer who cracked this time. "I don't want to disappear from her life. I also don't want to stand in the way of your marriage." With her last words, Hanna began to sob openly. "I'm here for you Hanna, I'm not going anywhere."

X

All 752 students at Rosewood High School had to have a meeting with the guidance counselor before being approved to go on to the next grade. The entire month of June was filled with fifteen minute meetings with the student body, starting with the seniors ending with the freshman. With three days left of school and almost every student having already had their interviews, Emily wondered why she hadn't had hers yet. In first period she finally got her appointment slip, it was at 9:45, midway through her second period class. She walked towards the office she spent many afternoons in. Ms. Marin was a great listener and gave useful advice, she'd grown to like her but stopped going to talk to her after her blow up with Spencer. Emily kept telling herself it was easier to be mad at Spencer than to be hurt, but no matter what, nothing could cushion the blow. She felt indescribable pain which she took out on Spencer. She stopped their Friday breakfast, she stopped talking to her. She ignored the texts that came in regularly for a week after their argument. She stopped calling her Spencer and started calling her Ms. Hastings again. Emily felt a twinge of delight in the face Spencer made whenever Emily would say her name. It had been so long since she called her Ms. Hastings, and she knew it hurt Spencer. Emily wasn't dumb, she knew everything Spencer said to her the day of their argument, was nothing but the truth. That didn't matter though, not now at least, not when their friendship was over. She took a breath, then opened the door.

"Okay doc, let's get this over...what is she doing here?" Emily asked harshly.

"You know what Emily, I have to run to the principal's office, sit in here and wait for me. I'll be right back." Hanna hurried out of the tension filled room and closed the door behind her.

Spencer felt odd sitting in the office she had many a dalliances with Hanna. Particularly because just the night before they ended their affair. But what was more odd was sitting there with the girl who barely wanted to look at her.

"So you're never going to talk to me again?"

"What is there to talk about _Ms. Hastings_?" Asked Emily, with a slight sneer.

"Stop that."

"Stop what _Ms. Hastings_?"

"Stop being an asshole!" That cause Emily to look at her finally.

"Oh, I'm the asshole?! When you're the one who promised to always be there for me and then just..."

"Just what?! I didn't do anything wrong! Please tell me how it's wrong for me to want you to get better! I needed to remove myself so you could heal some. And look at you, you're better. Now can we put this nonsense behind us. Not only because we've grown so close, but because I'm your teacher for the next two years whether you like it or not. And don't think I don't know about you trying to get transferred.

Emily scoffed. "Whatever."

"Stop being so childish, you're better than this. Emily...please" Spencer pleaded.

Her hard shell was beginning to crack, but she said nothing. Spencer got up and towered over her, she grabbed Emily's face to force their eyes to meet.

"Fine, you want it to be like this? Fine. I'll deal. But you hurt me Emily. This...hurts." She let her face go and walked out the room.

X

Four more weeks of vacation before school started back up and Spencer couldn't be more content. Hanna just left with Abigail in tow. It was difficult at first, but they managed to keep their hands off each other long enough for Hanna to work on her marriage. After Hanna emphatically told Caleb she wasn't going to stop being Spencer's friend, he demanded to meet her. Much to her surprise, they ended up having a five-hour long talk in the park and he actually liked her. He cursed himself aloud, but he in fact liked her. She assured him she would respect his marriage and he believed her. He stopped being so self conscious about Hanna and Abigail spending time with Spencer and that made the transition from cuddie buddies to platonic friends much smoother for them all.

Spencer was sitting on her big comfy couch getting yelled at by Sean Ackard through her Bluetooth headset. They were playing Halo and he was kicking her butt.

"Ha! Got you!"

"Settle down Sean, we've played what? A million times and this is your first time beating me? Relax, it won't happen again."

"Whatever, you're just a sore loser. Loser!" Sean teased.

"Maybe you're just a sore winner. I'm sleepy, I'm off my game." Reasoned Spencer.

"Loser!"

"Goodbye." She ended their connection on the headset and the console. She stretched her arms above her head and laid down. Her eyes were closed and before she knew it, she was sleep. The loud knocking at her door woke her up some odd hours later. She thought it could be Aria who constantly left her keys upstairs in her own apartment. Instead of going to retrieve them, she'd just bang on the door. Spencer got up and yelled she was coming. What was waiting for her on the other side of the door was shocking to say the least. After a brief discussion and some confusion being cleared up, she let her unexpected guest enter her home. They sat on her couch and sipped iced tea. Spencer didn't know what to say once they were done exchanging pleasantries, so she sipped and said nothing.

"I want to make love to you."

"Whoa, what the hell?" Exclaimed Spencer. "You can't just show up here telling me you wanna make love. What makes you think I'd go for that."

"Because, we never had our "last" time. You know, a proper send off. I regret losing you but I also regret that. I always wished we could at least have one last time. I'm single, you're single, what's the big deal?"

"Maya...I really don't know about that."

"I know you're sitting there asking yourself "why" but ask yourself this instead. Why not?" Maya sat her iced tea down on the coffee table and did the same with Spencer's. She scooted closer until their lips were a breath away from each other. "Why not Bugg?"

The first kissed they shared in a little over five years surpassed remarkable. Her lips weren't as soft, the were softer. Her taste wasn't as sweet, it was sweeter. The instant and familiar ache between her legs was almost unbearable as Maya's lips moved against hers. The sensational response Spencer's body was having to Maya straddling her hips was extraordinary. The nerves at the ends of her fingertips burned with passion as they found their way to Maya's bare skin. While Maya buried her hands in Spencer's hair, Spencer inched up her shirt to caress her back. Small cries of pleasure left both of their lips with their tongues tangled. Becoming reacquainted with each other's bodies was easier than either women would have imagined. Maya began grinding her hips up and down and Spencer mimicked her movements unconsciously. Maya's shirt was behind the coach in an instant. Spencer's soon followed. Both women were equally bare in another few seconds. Maya was on the floor on her knees spreading Spencer's legs wide. Spencer moved so that she was slightly hanging off the couch. Maya looked into her eyes, and told her she missed tasting her. Not another word was spoken.

X

"What?! I'm going to kill you Spencer Hastings."

"Oh boy. Aria calm down. Please?" She was a week removed from her goodbye sex with Maya. It took her just as much time to get the courage to tell her best friend. Plus she didn't want Maya to be in the same state as them, so she waited until she was safely back in California.

"When did this happen? Why did you let it happen? Where is she so I can kill her too!"

"Aria..."

"Don't Aria me! Answer my fucking questions!"

"It was a week ago. Because I wanted to. And she's far enough away that even if I did tell you, she'd have more than enough time to find safety."

"Don't be a smart ass." Aria flopped down on Spencer's bed in a huff. Spencer sat up and put her back against the headboard with her legs in front of her and waited patiently for her fiery friend to calm down. "How was it?"

Spencer's laughter shook the bed. "Oh my god!" She was laughing so hard she was doubled over, holding her sides. "You're such a perv! Even though you hate her." She tried between laughs. "You still wanna know! That's hilarious!"

Aria cracked a smile, Spencer had a point. "How don't you know she's not out there fucking a million bitches bringing you some diseases and shit?"

"She swore Aria." Spencer calmed down a bit before she continued. "She told me over and over she hasn't had sex since the last time we did."

"And you believe her?"

"Well...yeah. It makes sense. Up until now she didn't have the confidence to be out. She was terrified of being found out so she threw herself into work. Anytime she even thought about maybe hooking up with someone, she didn't for fear of them running to Us magazine for a tell all. She said after awhile she became celibate."

"Until last week?"

"She met a girl she really likes and she didn't want to open one door without closing the other so to speak."

"So she used you?"

"Yeah, she used me up." Responded Spencer with a sly smile.

"You're gross."

"Pot." She pointed to Aria. "Kettle." She pointed to herself.

"Whatever, so you both got the closure you need? Cause she better not come back around here, I'll fuck her up!"

Spencer doubled over in laughter again. "Yeah, yeah munchkin, no need to jack her up. We both...it was very therapeutic. We needed that."

"You're okay with her dating some new girl?"

"Yeah, I mean I was engaged wasn't I, even though it was only for like two weeks. Maya really just wanted to see if there was anything left here, if we could salvage "us" you know. We worked through it, shared some tears, shared some orgasms, and some conversation, not in that order, and we're both past each other. I'm glad we did that, now I'll never have to wonder."

"You still didn't tell me how it was." Aria pressed.

"Ha, you're something else you know that? It was better than I remember. It was really really good.

X

Emily's summer was blasé to say the least. More than uneventful in June and most of July. That was until the house next to hers was inhabited by the Dilaurentis'. They had a daughter Emily's age and much to her delight, they became fast friends. It started with sleepovers at Paige's mini mansion tree house. Then frequent trips to the mall and movies. Paige, Mona, Emily, and Alison had more fun than they could measure. On a particularly humid day in August Paige was away and so was Mona. Alison and Emily were left to their own devices so they made their way to a local stream. Always the little dare-devil, Alison suggested they skinny dip. Emily wasn't nervous because she didn't want to Alison to see her body, she was more nervous at the idea of seeing Alison's. Emily's growing attraction to her vibrant, charismatic neighbor served as an impediment. When Alison insisted, Emily gave her a firm "no". Alison shrugged her shoulders and started to shed her clothes. Emily looked away, but couldn't help but steal a few peeks.

"Come in! Come on Em, the water's amazing, it's just the right temperature!" Alison said, trying to coax Emily.

"No way Ali not gonna happen."

"Please." This girl wasn't above begging and her puppy dog eyes were Emily's kryptonite.

"Fine, fine, you big baby."

"Yay!" Alison swam a little farther into the stream as Emily undressed. Once she caught up, Alison put her hands on top of her head and dunked Emily. Emily came up laughing and splashed a gob of water in Alison's face. Alison readily responded with a splash of her own. They played around some more before swimming a little further.

"You hear that?"

"No, what."

"Just the water and the wild. It's so peaceful so...serene. It's perfect out here. I'm really loving Rosewood."

"Yeah it is." Emily agreed. "That's a good name for a song, the water and the wild."

"Hey, if it goes gold I want my cut." They shared a quick laugh before Alison's face fell serious. "Emily?"

"Hmm?"

"Why don't you have a boyfriend?"

That was the million dollar question she'd been waiting for. "Uh, I was in a year-long relationship up until January. I don't really think I'm over it just yet."

"But, that was six months ago. He couldn't have been that great if he let you go."

"She died."

Alison gasped. Emily was sure it was because she was gay. She was trying to avoid having to come out to someone all over again, but she had no desire to go back into hiding, she asked so she got the truth. Emily braced herself for whatever reaction might come her way. To her surprise Alison's face got incredibly sad, she looked like she might cry. She raised her hand to her gaping mouth and swam the short distance to Emily, wrapping her in a hug.

"I'm so sorry to hear that Em. I'm so sorry." She whispered into Emily's neck. Emily wasn't sure if she should hug back, they were stark naked after all, but she went against her better judgment and returned the embrace. Their bodies were melded together as if they were one. There wasn't a single inch of space between them and Emily fought to calm the awakening of her sexual desires. That part of her has been sleep for far too long, and Alison's perky breast rubbing against her own was doing nothing to help. She wasn't sure how long they held each other, nor was she sure of Alison's intentions. Perhaps Alison was just that comfortable with her, perhaps she wasn't as aware of how naked they were as Emily was. Perhaps...

"Emily, if you want...I could try to make you feel better."

Emily had trouble having her mouth catch up to her brain. She immediately began comparing Alison to Samara after the offer. Her eyes were blue like Samara's but lighter. Samara's was an ocean blue. Her hair was blonde too, but a dirty blonde where Samara's was light. Her hair was much longer than Samara's had been. She liked to keep her hair shoulder length, never letting it grow too much beyond. Alison's mane flowed past the middle of her back. Where Samara's hair was straight, Alison's was full of curls, currently washed away by the stream. Emily looked at Alison's lips, they were pink, not as pink as Samara's had been though. Fuller, they were definitely fuller. Emily would often stare at her pouty lips when Alison wasn't paying attention. She looked at Alison, studied her every feature. Her dimple on the left side of her face, her unpronounced cleft chin, the way she cocked her head to the side waiting for an answer. She was pretty, not as pretty as Samara, but she was pretty.

"Make me feel better...how?"

"Like this." Alison placed a restrained kiss on Emily's lips. She could tell Alison wanted to do more, feel more, but was waiting for Emily's okay.

"I don't want another relationship. Not for a while, or forever maybe I don't know. But I have no interest in anything serious. Like, at all."

"So...friends with benefits?"

"If that's okay with you then it's okay with me."

"Okay then...let me work on making you feel...better." Alison slowly moved her hand from around Emily's neck and slid it down to her breast. She massaged it while she kissed Emily again. This time deeper, with more want. Her hand didn't stay long, it soon traveled down Emily's torso and spread her legs. Alison was inside Emily in a second flat.

X

On 1st S Broad St in downtown Philadelphia, Spencer was enjoying a nine ounce sirloin steak at McCormick and Schmick's. She's spent the better part of her afternoon perusing the racks at her favorite stores on Walnut and Chestnut street. She made a reservation for one during for lunch the day before. Spencer sat at the bar and ate, completely unaware of the eyes that were burning a hole in the back of her head. Once done with her lunch, she made her way to the restrooms. She was flossing in the mirror when the door angrily swung open, she looked in the mirror to find lustful eyes staring back at her. Spencer turned around to speak, but before words could be formed, lips were on hers. They kissed one of the most passionate kisses Spencer had ever experienced. She was far too engrossed in the kiss to stop it, even though everything in her body screamed stop. Before she opened her eyes again, Emily was out the door.

**MUST I ASK FOR FEEDBACK?**


	28. Chapter 25

**A READER ASKED ME: "But I have to ask, why use a condom on a strap on?"**

**BECAUSE IT'S LESS MESSY, AND IT'S BETTER HYGIENE. IF YOU USE THE SAME STRAP, ON DIFFERENT GIRLS, JUST USE CONDOMS : ) PLUS WHEN YOU SWITCH WHO'S WEARING THE STRAP, NEW CONDOM. IT'S JUST CLEANER IN MY OPINION.**

**SO I'M NOT FRUSTRATED ANYMORE, I THINK YOU HAVE ALL SUFFERED LONG ENOUGH...**

**A WEEK BEFORE THE KISS**

"Emily, Em...fuck! You feel so good, don't stop." Alison panted out while Emily swirled her tongue against her. "Right there...yes, yes! Like that. Fuck!"

Emily moaned as she tasted Alison. She tasted sweet, but Emily couldn't help but think she wasn't as sweet as Samara. She worked her tongue up and down then sucked Alison into her mouth. Alison began to inch up the bed. Emily smirked thinking about the lessons Samara taught her _"Back arching is definitely a good sign. And when she bites her lip. Also if she tries to run from you. And if you can make her toes curl, you're doing great."_ Emily pulled away from Alison and placed two fingers inside, once she found a rhythm, she glanced at her toes. They were gripping the sheets. She looked up at Alison, her back was arching off the bed as she chanted Emily's name. She occasionally bit her lip, then covered her face. Emily's smirk returned as she took her into her mouth again and Alison tried to squirm away. _Sammy taught me well_, she mused to herself. She pulled her fingers out and attacked every inch with her mouth.

For reasons she wasn't all that certain of, she thought about Samara every time she had sex with Alison. The little things that were the same, the other things that were drastically different. Often she wondered if Samara could see her, if she was over her shoulder fuming or egging her on. She wondered if the love of her life would be mad that she's sleeping with someone else, or jealous,_ I bet she's jealous._ The last time she visited her grave, she told her about her new "friends with benefits" situation. In her mind, they argued about it. She could hear Samara telling her she could have sex with someone way hotter than Alison. In her mind Samara wasn't mad she was having sex, she was mad that the girl wasn't "sexy" enough. She always told Emily that if they break up or she cheats, that the other girl had to be way hotter than her. Alison wasn't what you'd call sexy, she was wholesome and sweet, the typical girl next door. If she hadn't initiated sex in the stream, Emily would have never thought she was gay, she just didn't seem like the type. She was daddy's little princess and mommy's perfect daughter. There was a bit of an edge to Alison, but a sexy lesbian, she was not. Much to Emily's surprise, Alison's parents knew she was gay and was perfectly fine with it.

Emily spread Alison's legs a little further, when they were where she wanted them, she slipped her fingers back inside while still licking. She pumped in and out of her until her juices spilled her all over her hand, chin and the towel Emily put beneath her. Alison always got really wet, wetter than Samara. Emily had to change her sheets every time they had sex, until she had the presence of mind to put a towel down.

Emily climbed up Alison and laid fully on top of her, per Alison's request. Their bodies hugged closely and they both sighed contently. Emily laid her head in between her shoulder and neck. Alison ran her left hand up and down Emily's back and her right massaged her scalp. Emily was half asleep when Alison spoke.

"You wanna come to Philly with me next week to celebrate me getting my car? We can shop and I can make a reservation at McCormick and Schmick's. Their seafood is out of this world."

"Really? I've never been." Emily replied sleepily.

"Oh, we have to go then. Plus I really just want to see center city."

"It's nothing special."

"Philadelphia is one of the most special cities in the world. It's the birthplace of America. Can we go see the liberty bell?" Alison was always excited about things she discovered in Pennsylvania. Her family lived in Courtland, Virginia her whole life until her father got a job offer in Rosewood. The population there is 1,284, so almost anything excited the blonde.

"I could take you to see love park, and the liberty bell." Offered Emily.

"What? Seriously? You're literally the most awesome person ever! I can't wait." Alison held Emily a little tighter. "What was she like?"

"Who?"

"Sammy."

Shock. Sadness. Neither properly described what emotion took over her body. She felt like Alison's question ripped her heart out and tossed it in a shredder. Her body became a statue, unmoved and hard. She closed her eyes, held her breath, and counted to ten before she thought to compose herself. The question was innocent enough. She wondered when Alison would start to ask questions about..._her_. It truly was only a matter of time. But for Samara's nickname name to effortlessly leak out of Alison's lips was displeasing to say the least. This was out of nowhere, this was after talking about a trip to Philly, this was after _sex_.

"Uh...where'd, uh, where'd that come from?" It was all she could think to say.

"You're vulnerable right now. Thought I'd sneak it up on you."

"That's...mean. And calculating."

"It's honest Emily."

Emily sighed. "Why do you want to know?" She was stalling.

"Because you loved her."

"Care to elaborate?" Emily's nerves were rattling, her heart rate was slowly creeping to an erratic pace. She never talked about Samara, to anyone. Except Spencer. When the thought of Spencer filled her mind, her heart sped up more. She missed Spencer in an eerily similar way to how she missed Samara, but Spencer wasn't dead.

"Could you tell me please? I really want to know what she was like. How she got you to fall in love with her."

"Why?"

"Because you're so closed off and I'm sure that has to do with her death, but I'd like to get a glimpse of the real you, the girl who could have possibly loved me. I'd also like to know about the girl she loved and lost in the most tragic way. Is that such an odd request?" Alison's boldness and honesty never bothered Emily. Until now.

"Do I look like I want to talk about her?" Emily asked with a ton of bite.

"No. Do you ever talk about her?" Emily answers Alison with silence so she continues. "That's unhealthy Em, what did she do to make you fall in love with her?" Alison wasn't the type to back down. A fact Emily was all too aware of.

"I don't know." Emily starts to relent. Talking about Samara is certainly not her favorite pass time, but holding in the bittersweet memories is slowly tormenting her.

"How'd you meet?"

She tells her the story of her first encounter with Samara with a wide smile on her face. She recalled being instantly attracted to the brazen stranger in the gymnasium. Emily explained how she was just coming to terms with her sexuality and Samara helped her out after inviting herself over to her house. Reminiscing about one of the most significant moments of her life about the most impactful person who has ever loved her was alleviating. Surprisingly so. Emily had all but locked up and thrown away the key pertaining to all things Samara. Anything she thought, felt, or said was for her and her only. Except Spencer, she could always open up to her. Once the floodgates were open, her history with Samara came pouring down like a rainstorm. Every joke, all the sex, all the fights, everything.

"Well...I clearly see why you fell in love." Alison expressed once Emily was done. "One more question."

"What?"

"What were your last words to her?"

Emily would love to agonize over her last words to her deceased girlfriend. She felt sickened by the fact that she took solace in their last conversation. If they had argued or exchanged harsh words, then she can hold on to that guilt forever, she could always feel pain. She didn't want to get better. When Spencer told her one day it wouldn't hurt as much, she panicked. Not feeling sadness about Samara's death is what made her not want to move on, not get out of her bed except to go to school, alienate her parents and friends. The one thing she took both equal parts joy and disgust in was their last words. Maybe she should have said more, what if Samara had never called her, maybe she was wrong to be happy that their final words would always be a sweet memory. Having "final words" with Samara was the last thing on her mind, she thought she'd see her girlfriend in only a few more moments. Only the next time she saw her, she was laying still in a pine box.

"She was getting us breakfast and tea, she called to tell me she'd be at my house in 15 minutes. We told each other we love each other and hung up." Her recount of the last things they'd ever said was small, timid.

"Wow," Emily braced herself for whatever Alison might say. "That's amazing, that's beautiful. At least you can live with that forever. Knowing the last thing you expressed to each other was love. She left this earth knowing you love her." Alison pulled her head back to smile down at Emily and they didn't speak another word.

**TWELVE MINUTES BEFORE THE KISS**

Staring at Spencer Hastings was something Emily did so often, she didn't even recognize it when she did it. As Alison went on and on about the sights they had seen already and what else they were going to do that day, Emily watched the back of Spencer's head as she ate what looked like steak. After the heart wrenching episode inside of the guidance counselor's office, Emily skipped the last few days of school. Astonishment washed over her body when she finally allowed herself to look in Spencer's eyes. When she grabbed her chin and their eyes met, she saw it. Something so familiar, and so apparent. Spencer was hurt, that was clear, but there was also a yearning there, maybe even lust. The days that followed were confusing and she didn't need to sit in a class for over an hour looking at and listening to the source of that confusion. How could Spencer have those feelings for her? It couldn't be could it? The question is the same one and the answer is walking toward the bathroom.

It's now or never so Emily excuses herself and heads for the clarification she desperately needs. She pushed the door open with more force than she meant. Spencer stares at her through the mirror and she stares back. Before she left her seat she was sure all she wanted to do was talk. Unfortunately for her and her libido, Spencer was wearing the tiniest jean shorts and a thin Phillies tank top. By the time Spencer turned away from the mirror, Emily grabbed her face with both hands and attacked her lips. Her mouth tasted better than anything her dreams could ever come up with. Her beautiful lips were so soft and Emily wanted more. The second Spencer's lips parted, Emily stuck her tongue inside. Spencer whimpered and that only drove Emily more. She massaged Spencer's tongue just like she's been taught. Only she wasn't thinking of her teacher in that moment, no, Samara was nowhere near her mind. The only teacher that had her attention was on the other end of her lips. She tilted her head to the other side as she kissed Spencer with a little more power. Their breathing increased. The fact that Spencer's hands never left the sink she was holding onto behind her, was not lost on Emily, she'll have to ask about it later. Right now her mouth feels too good. Their kiss slows down from its frantic pace as Emily lays three more pecks on the beautiful mouth she just consumed, then she ran out of the bathroom.

Someone from high above must have pulled her away from Spencer in that very moment because Alison was making her way to the restroom area.

"I thought you fell into the toilet." She chuckled at her own joke. "What took you so long?"

"I was...thinking."

"About?"

"Why do you always want to be in my head?" There was a little more aggression in her tone than she would have liked. But Alison was never put off by aggressive Emily.

"Because you always try to hide it." She winked. "Come on let's go to Rita's and get some water ice. Your treat since I already paid for lunch."

Emily silently thanked God for Alison in that moment. She hadn't acknowledged him since the day Samara died, but he was obviously still looking out for her. She looked over her shoulder towards the restrooms as Alison pulled her out of the restaurant. No sign of Spencer.

**PRESENT TIME**

_Holy shit! I just let Emily Fields stick her tongue down my throat. Fuck! This is not good, this is as far from good as anything could possibly be. Wait was that even real? Maybe I was fantasizing. But my lips, my mouth, that impossible feeling between my thighs. A fantasy couldn't do that, right? Her lips, her taste, my God that was...WRONG. That was wrong. Keep telling yourself how wrong that was. But it felt...that doesn't matter. She's your student. She's a kid._

Spencer's more than entranced by her own thoughts as she tried to avoid her reflection in the mirror. When she came to from the heavenly trance Emily lips put her in, she turned around and gripped the sides of the sink. She hung her head and stared down the drain which she hasn't looked up from. She has no clue how long the kiss was or how long it's been over. She certainly doesn't want to see Emily out in the restaurant so she takes a little more time before washing her hands again and exiting the bathroom.

**OVER 500 REVIEWS, ALMOST 200 FOLLOWS...I'M THRILLED WITH THE INTEREST IN THIS FIC. THANK YOU LOVES...**

**FEEDBACK?**


	29. Chapter 26

**I REALLY, REALLY DON'T THINK YOU'RE READY! THE A/N AT THE BOTTOM IS IMPORTANT TO ME SO PLEASE READ. WARNING: SMUT IN CHAPTER...I DON'T NORMALLY MAKE IT FLITHY...FORGIVE ME**

It was all good just a week ago. Was Spencer's life perfect? No. Was everything gumdrops and rainbows? No. But there was no turmoil. Currently Spencer is drowning in the most confusing, unexpected turmoil she's ever endured. A week has gone by and Emily still won't return her calls or texts. Emily has given her no choice but an unwanted, ugly confrontation. School starts in three weeks and Spencer has zero intention of the first time they speak being in a class setting. Going over to the Fields' house was more than risky. Her friends could be there, or worse her mom or dad could be home. She could not be there or she could choose to not open the door. But this is a risk Spencer has to take, she needs answers.

"What are you doing here Spencer?" _Rude, so this is how she wants to play it?_ Spencer wonders to herself.

"Are you home alone?" Spencer matches her discourteous tone.

"Yeah."

Spencer pushes pass Emily without another word until she's firmly seated in her living room. She reached for the remote and turned off whatever reality show Emily was watching. "We need to talk Emily. We didn't do much of _that_ the last time I saw you."

Emily rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. She stood in the threshold of the living room, seemingly wary of coming closer. "Talk about what?"

Spencer stood up with haste. "Talk about what?! Are you kidding me Emily?! Stop acting like a petulant child and come in here so we can discuss this!"

As much as she was dreading it, Emily knew she couldn't hide from Spencer for long. At the very least, she'd have to see her first thing on the first day of school. Then there would be other people around, then she'd be able to make an escape. There's no escaping Spencer's wrath in her own home.

She sat back down. "Why'd you do it?" On her way over to Emily's, Spencer thought she'd handle the matter with sensitivity and delicacy. But the attitude she was given, as soon as the door opened, torpedoed her plans. So, she got straight to the point.

"Be more specific."

"The kiss, why'd you kiss me Emily?"

She sighed heavily. "Because I could tell, I could just tell you wanted me to."

"How?" Spencer asks instead of trying to correct her.

"That day in the office, I could see it. I wanted to maybe talk to you when I saw you in the restaurant but, I couldn't just talk. I had to..." She trailed off.

Spencer thought back to their impromptu meeting in Hanna's office. She knew she wouldn't be able to hide her pain from Emily on that day two months ago, even if she hadn't told her just how much Emily's behavior was hurting her. She so desperately tried to keep the longing from reaching her eyes, to now gain the knowledge that she failed, hurt even worse. "What? You had to what?"

"Do what I've been wanting to do since the first day of 9th grade." If they were going to have an honest talk, she figured she might as well be honest.

Too many moments that she couldn't explain began to make sense to Spencer. The mornings, the baked goods, the smiles, the hugs. None of it was innocent, and she was more than a willing participant. Although Emily never tried anything until a week ago, Spencer realized none of Emily's motives were ever pure. She felt sick.

"Emily, what you did was wrong!" She wasn't just talking about the kiss, but she couldn't' bring herself to ask Emily to confirm her suspicions.

"What I did? I don't remember holding a gun to your head Spencer! You kissed me back! You want me too."

Spencer stood up, horrified. "I, I wasn't...I didn't act...fuck Emily. I don't want you. I shouldn't have kissed you back but, I was taken by surprise."

"You were surprised for damn near five minutes?" Skepticism colored her tone.

"Emily. Have you told anyone?"

"No. Why would I?"

"Good. Don't. I have to go." Spencer's path to the front door was intercepted by Emily's long body. Spencer was now at least two inches shorter than Emily. Two summers in a row she had gone through growth spurts. She was lean and fully developed. Emily may be sixteen, but she looked like a full grown woman. She stood in front of Spencer with confidence neither of them knew she had.

"Wait, Spence. Please don't go." Emily pleaded.

"I have to Em."

"Wait, just...can't we...shoot, I don't even know what I'm asking here." The rude, abrasive Emily was gone. She wanted Spencer to stay and she only had a chance of being persuasive, with kindness. "Just stay, please?"

"For what? What would be the purpose?"

Emily put her hand on Spencer's elbow. She ran her hand slowly up her arm, to her shoulder, to her neck, to her face, as she watched Spencer's breathing change. Spencer didn't move, she couldn't. Her entire body felt weighed down, like every limb was lead. As Emily leaned in, Spencer's mind told her this was wrong. But her heart and body fought her mind, saying it felt right. Before Emily could initiate another heated kiss, Spencer's mind won the battled.

"Emily..." Spencer breathed out. She placed her hand on Emily's chest to stop her progression.

"Please..."

"No." The word wasn't harsh, but the shove she gave Emily was. She continued her walk to the door, but not before glaring over her shoulder at her former favorite student. "Don't you ever try to do that again. Are we clear? Oh, and you wanted out of my classroom? You got it. For the record, I was the one who declined your transfer request in the first place. But for obvious reasons, I can't have you in my class anymore." The next thing Emily heard was the door slamming.

X

**THREE DAYS LATER**

Spencer cradled a crying Abigail while Hanna showered. Caleb was out of town and Hanna asked Spencer if her and Abigail could come over so they wouldn't be alone. As the restless toddler calmed down, Spencer felt a hand on her shoulder.

"You're so good with her." Whispered Hanna.

"I'm not, not good."

"Come on Miss English, you know you aren't supposed to use double negatives." They both chuckled then turned their attention to the now sleep Abigail. "Here, give her to me..."

"No, I got it. I'll put her down." Spencer insisted.

Hanna followed Spencer into her guest room where she and her daughter were sleeping. She watched Spencer carefully lay Abigail down then pull the comforter up to tuck her in. She then placed a few pillows around her so she wouldn't roll around. Hanna's heart melted when she saw Spencer stroke the little girl's dark hair and kiss her temple. Spencer turned off the lamp and walked to where Hanna stood.

"Going to bed?"

"Not yet, gotta brush my teeth and stuff. Plus it's not that late." Answered Spencer.

"Wanna watch a movie?"

"Yeah. Meet you in the living room?"

"Okay."

Spencer was in the middle of brushing her teeth when Hanna appeared in the mirror behind her with an all too familiar facial expression.

"Remember that time I blew you when you brushed your teeth?" Hanna asked a little too casually.

Not expecting such an inquiry, Spencer's hand stilled. Her mouth hung open slightly as a little toothpaste slipped past her lips and into the sink. She regained her composure and finished brushing her teeth. She spit and rinsed then wiped her mouth with her towel, she then laid it on the sink. When her eyes locked with Hanna's in the mirror, her lustful gazed had intensified.

"Of course I remember that." How could she forget.

"I really don't know what I miss more. Your dick in my mouth or your pussy."

Spencer's gulp was audible. "Han, you can't talk like that."

"Why not?"

"Because, you just can't. Okay?"

"I miss you Spencer." Hanna slipped her arms around Spencer's waste from behind, bringing her front to Spencer's back.

"I'm right here Han."

"You know what I mean."

"We can't."

"Why not?" Hanna wondered.

"Because...Caleb trusts me."

Hanna dropped her arms. Their eyes still connected. "You had to bring him up didn't you."

"Are things not working?"

Hanna lowered her head. "Actually...things have been great. Better than before."

"So then what are you doing right now?" Spencer needed to know what was motivating Hanna to seduce her.

She looked at Spencer again. "I miss you. I miss making love. I miss kissing. I miss fucking. I miss role playing. Spencer seriously, that was the best sex of my life."

"Is sex not good with him?"

"No, no it's not that. It's great. But you..." Hanna licked her lips while blatantly looking Spencer up and down. "You're just...can't I have you both?"

"I don't think Caleb would go for that." Spencer said, laughing.

"Please, he let me fuck whoever I wanted for almost two years. I don't really think it would take much to convince him, plus he really likes you."

"Are you being serious right now? You want me to be your mistress that you husband approves of?" She was starting to get offended.

"No, I want my husband, but I want you to be my girlfriend too. I think he'd be okay with it."

"So you want us to be in a three-way relationship?"

"No, more like I have you and I have him and I keep you two separate."

"That's selfish."

"It's what I want."

Spencer thought about it for a few more moments. "I'd have to think about that Hanna."

"Okay, I'll talk to him."

"How can you be so cavalier about this?"

"What's the big deal?"

"Nothing I guess." She shrugged.

"So come back into your bedroom and fuck me."

"Hanna..." Spencer warned. "How about not and say we did?."

"How about we _not _get drunk and say we did? That way we'd have an excuse when he asks." Her face was innocent but her intentions were pure evil.

"I'd rather not."

"Spencer." Hanna whined.

"Good night Hanna." She turned around, kissed her forehead, and pushed her out of her bathroom and bedroom, locking the door behind her.

X

"Okay so you have sex with girls?"

Paige, Alison, and Emily all erupted with laughter. It was the first time since Mona found out about Samara that she's asked any questions.

"Well I'm pretty sure you know I have sex." Emily continued laughing.

"Okay...but how?" Mona asked.

"What do you mean?"

"What do y'all do? I mean I know what a guy and a girl does, but..."

"It's not all that different."

"Plus it's hotter." Alison said. All eyes fell on her.

Paige spoke up first. "You've been with girls?"

"You didn't know I was gay. Oh, well, I'm gay. Thought I mentioned that." She shrugged.

"Okay, uh...Em, even though you didn't answer my sex question, I gotta ask another one. Did you know Alison was gay? Like with your top-secret gaydar?" Mona questioned, only to be met with thunderous laughter by the other three girls.

X

There were three loud knocks in concession at the door. Spencer walks over and looked through the peephole to see Emily. It had been a week since she they spoke in Emily's living room and two weeks since the kissing incident, she'd been counting. She opened the door and looked at her student. Spencer hung her head and closed her eyes tight, she didn't feel like dealing with the emotional rollercoaster Emily's been putting her through. She huffed and groaned loudly before she raised her head again to look at Emily. They stood there for a moment, not knowing what to say.

"Emily what are you doing here?"

Emily held her arm and stroked it nervously while looking at Spencer. It was a while before she spoke. "Can we talk?"

Spencer titled her head back and looked at her ceiling. She wasn't sure if she should let Emily in, but she was positive they needed to talk. She put her head back down to look at Emily and silently moved aside to let her in. Spencer shut the door and barely turned all the way around before Emily's lips were on hers. Her mind told her to push Emily off, that this kiss was even more wrong then the first. This was her and her 16-year-old student, alone in her apartment, kissing, but she grabbed Emily's waist and pulled her closer. Emily tightened her grip around Spencer's neck and eagerly slipped her tongue in her mouth. Spencer couldn't help but reciprocate by sliding her tongue against Emily's. She felt so wrong, so dirty, she felt like she was going to go straight to hell for this but couldn't stop herself. Emily moaned into the kiss and Spencer finally snapped out of her haze. She placed her hands on Emily's shoulders and pushed her far enough that she was arms length away.

"This is so wrong on so many levels! We can't do this Emily!"

"We're already doing it." Emily tried to lean back in but Spencer moved from around her and walked to her couch. She stood there with her back still to Spencer contemplating her next move. She gingerly turned around to she Spencer sitting on her couch with her face in her hands. "Spencer I've wanted you from the second..."

"Stop! Just stop it Emily! I can't...we can't..."

"Why not, I'm 16 now, that's the legal age of consent in Pennsylvania."

Spencer glared at Emily and was almost impressed. "Yes that's true, but I'm a teacher so the law considers me to be in a position of power over you and you aren't 18. Meaning if we had sex and anyone found out I'd be charge with Corruption of a Minor which is a felony."

"No one would find out..."

"Emily..."

"Spencer, I need you. I want you. I have since the moment I laid eyes on you, Spencer, please. Don't act like you don't want this too."

"Emily you..." A pair of soft lips cut Spencer's words short. Before she even had time to blink, Emily was straddling her thighs and her tongue was exploring her mouth. Once again Spencer thought of the countless reasons she should stop this, but couldn't find the willpower to. She put her hands on either side of herself, gripping at the couch. She thought that if she could just resist touching Emily, she could pretend it wasn't real. Emily's hands were running through Spencer's hair before gripping it tightly, pulling Spencer's mouth closer. Emily was wearing a thin black skirt and Spencer could feel the wet heat on her thighs. It took her another two minutes before deciding to give up. She reached behind Emily to firmly grab her and push her down on her thighs, making Emily groan in pleasure at the contact. They kissed heatedly for a long while, both in a frenzy. Emily was so wet that the fabric of her underwear could no longer contain it. She dripped onto the thighs below her which made Spencer stand up abruptly. Emily swung her legs around wrapping them at Spencer's waist, their lips never parting. Their tongues danced as Spencer walked them into her bedroom.

When she softly lowered Emily on her bed she finally pulled away from her lips. She took off her shirt and Emily quickly discarded her tank. Spencer slipped her shorts and underwear down in one swift motion while Emily pulled her skirt down and kicked off her underwear. Emily sat up and reached behind her back to unclasp her bra. Spencer drank in the sight of a completely naked Emily in her bed before removing her own bra. They stayed motionless, taking the other in. Emily wanted to tell Spencer to make love to her but she didn't think now was the time to speak. She slid back on the bed watching Spencer watch her from the edge. Spencer still hadn't moved and Emily thought she might be thinking about not finishing what they started so she slowly spread her legs. Spencer's eyes went wide. Emily put her hand between her thighs to collect some of the wetness. She lifted her hand and sucked her fingers into her mouth moaning at the taste of herself, enjoying the look Spencer was giving her. She put her hand back between her folds and rubbed herself, never breaking eye contact. Emily put some wetness on her right nipple then collected more only to bring her fingers to her left nipple and smear her juices. She looked down at her chest and looked back at Spencer, giving her a silent invitation. Spencer had never seen something so erotic in all her life.

She lunged forward in an instant, taking Emily's right nipple in her mouth. She licked and sucked until the only moisture left was her own saliva. She moved her attention to her other breast cupping the bottom and licking the erect nipple. Emily's held flew back while Spencer gave her chest and breast attention with her soft lips and thick, long tongue. Spencer, without warning, rammed two fingers inside of Emily.

"Is this what you wanted?" Spencer asked then reattached her mouth to Emily's breast.

"Yesssssss!" The elongated word came out loud and breathless.

Spencer quickly and forcefully thrusted in and out of Emily, slapping her center with the bottom of her palm every time she went back inside. Emily had a fist full of sheets in both of her hands. Spencer moved up to her collarbone, keeping her fast pace of thrusts steady. She ran her tongue from one side of Emily's shoulder to the other, sucking her flesh in her mouth, surely leaving a mark. Her mouth moved to Emily's neck where she bit her, hard. Emily screamed in reaction and tried to squirm away from Spencer's mouth and unrelenting hand, but with little success. Spencer thrusted back into Emily harder every time she pulled out. Emily had her eyes squeezed shut when she released on Spencer's hand. Her mouth was wide open as she screamed Spencer's name. Spencer wasted no time moving her mouth down Emily's sweating, panting body. Leaving light kisses that sent chills through Emily's body. She moved lower not stopping until she was positioned between Emily's thighs. They made rare eye contact as Spencer's mouth connected.

Emily eyes and head rolled back at the sensation. Her hands moved as if they had a mind of mind of their own to rest in Spencer's hair. She massaged her scalp as Spencer's tongue massaged her clit. Spencer was moaning as much as Emily was, and the slurping and suction noises were aiding Emily to another orgasm. Emily almost pinched herself to see if this moment was real, but she didn't want to risk it. Emily lifted her hips off the bed slightly to reach Spencer's mouth. She grinded up and down on Spencer's face and they were in perfect sync. The second time Emily climaxed was harder than the first, and she was loud enough to clue Spencer in. Not that Spencer needed any clue as to how well she'd taken care of Emily. The massive wet stain on her sheet was evidence enough. They both panted as Emily laid limp on the bed with Spencer resting her head on the inside of Emily's thighs.

Emily broke the silence that lingered first. "What are you thinking?"

Spencer crawled up the bed on the other side of Emily to avoid the wetness on the bed. She sat up and leaned against her headboard. Emily faced her and propped her head up on her hand. Her knee was bent and her long leg swayed back and forth lazily. Spencer took in the stunning sight. Her eyes raked from her ankles to her eyes.

"I'm thinking you can't tell anyone about this." Spencer stated seriously.

The content smile on Emily's face was replaced with a look of annoyance. "I know that Spencer, I wouldn't tell anyone."

"I'm serious Emily. Not a soul on this earth can know about this. I'd get in a lot of trouble."

"I know." Emily felt small, like a child being scolded for coloring on the wall. She laid on the bed waiting for Spencer to put her in a time out for misbehaving.

"Okay...good." She looked away from Emily and stared at the wall in front of her bed. She wanted Emily to touch her but didn't think to ask.

"I should go." Emily was out of the bed and pulling on her bra before Spencer could say anything else. She looked around for the rest of her clothing. Once fully dressed she looked over at a still naked Spencer who hadn't even tried to cover up.

"Emily we should talk about this."

"What's there to talk about? This was a fantasy of mine. I hit, so..." Emily's word tore through Spencer. She watched helplessly as Emily darted out of her bedroom. The next sound she heard was her front door closing.

**HEY...PLEASE GO CHECK OUT MY NEW QUINNTANA STORY IF YOU LIKE THEM AND EVEN IF YOU DON'T. IT'S CALLED "HOLDING MY LAST BREATH" IF YOU LIKE MY WRITING, YOU'LL LIKE THE STORY. I'M NOT ABOVE BRIBERY, BUT JUST GO READ AND REVIEW SO IT DOESN'T HAVE TO COME TO THAT, MKAY? : )**

**WHAT DO YOU THINK? SHOULD HANNA AND SPENCER START THIS THING UP AGAIN? HER AND EMILY AREN'T TOGETHER AND THEY ARE BOTH CONFUSED. WHAT IF SHE HAS THEM BOTH? WHAT ABOUT WHAT EMILY IS GOING TO DO WITH ALI NOW...SOOOOO WHAT DO Y'ALL THINK/WANT? WHAT'S YA THOUGHTS ON THIS CHAPTER?**


	30. Chapter 30

I'm Dealing with A death, among other complications, excuse my absence.

-Dee


	31. Chapter 27

**SERIOUSLY, PLEASE READ...**

**THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH FOR YOUR WELL WISHES.**

**ONE OF YOU CALLED MY WRITING "FILTH" AND TOLD ME I'M WASTING MY TIME ON FF AND THAT I SHOULD, IN FACT, DELETE MY PROFILE. BECAUSE I HAVE TO "ANSWER TO GOD FOR WHAT I'VE WRITTEN AND HOW IT AFFECTS THOSE WHO READ IT". OKAY "GUEST", BUT IF YOU CONSIDER WHAT I WRITE TO BE "FILTHY", WHY THE HELL ARE YOU READING? I'D ALSO LIKE TO ADDRESS YOU SAYING "These are just characters that you didn't even create."**

**WHILE I'M NOT AN ARROGANT PERSON, I'D LIKE TO BEG TO DIFFER. NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS ARE LIKE CANON, ARE THEY? I'VE DEVELOPED THEM...ME...THIS IS COMPLETELY OF MY MIND, JUST WITH PRETTY LITTLE LIAR'S NAMES. I COULD EASILY CHANGE THEIR NAMES TO WHATEVER I'D LIKE AND THIS COULD BE A COMPLETE WORK OF FICTION. COULD IT NOT?**

**FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T MIND THE FILTHY, SINFUL MATERIAL THAT I SUBJECT YOU TO, PLEASE READ ON.**

Emily rode her bike to Paige's as slowly as she could. Every second since Spencer opened her door was burned into her memory. She knew she handled what Spencer asked her in the most immature fashion. Their intimate encountered was now marred by a silly argument. She shook her head and peddled on. It was official, she was head over heels for Spencer. The sex was incredible and she was certain she wanted, no needed to be with her again, she just wasn't sure how it was possible. She parked her bike at the bottom of the tree house, hopped off, and climbed the stairs.

"What is that on your neck?" Paige asked.

Emily absently lifted her hand to rub her neck. "What does it look like?"

"Who are you messing around with?"

She intentionally avoided Alison's eyes. "People."

"People? As in plural? Wait. You're having sex?"

"Yeah."

"But..." Paige and Emily stared at each other, silently communicating. Everyone in the tree house knew where the conversation was headed.

"Say it." Emil demanded. When no one said anything she repeated herself. "Say it."

"Sammy." Paige almost whispered her name.

"She's dead." She stated coldly and the room fell silent. Emily pushed the palms of her hands into her eyes, willing herself not to cry. She inhaled and exhaled a deep breath and moved her hands down her face. "Am I suppose to be celibate the rest of my life? I think not."

"So who are these girls?" Alison asked with an expression Emily could read.

"Just girls."

"Someone special?" Mona wondered.

"No." Emily said quickly and firmly. "Just fucking."

Alison's eyes never left Emily, but the other two girls exchanged a look. "You didn't tell me you had fuck buddies." Alison said calmly.

"I don't tell you guys every move I make, and I don't have to. I'm single, I can fuck who I want."

"Two F bombs in one day." Paige laughed. "That's a record."

"Okay so since I'm the only one in the tree house who isn't currently sexually active, maybe you two lesbians can explain what it is you do."

"Mona..." Paige began.

"No It's alright. You have Sean and I was with Sammy for over a year and Ali, well we don't really know your dating history but I'm sure you're not a virgin." Emily smirked at Alison's annoyed expression. "So, if Mona wants to know about sex, I'll gladly tell her what I know. Plus if we keep her informed, it's less likely she'll make a mistake with some loser behind the 7-eleven." The girls laughed.

"Well you'd be correct Em, I'm far from a virgin. There's actually a girl I'm messing with now."

"What? Seriously?" Mona asked. "You've been in Rosewood for like two seconds and you've already found some chick to bone."

"Yep."

"Who?" Paige wanted to know.

"This really, really hot girl. You wouldn't know her."

"How do you know?" Emily challenged.

"Because I know everyone you girls hang out with. She isn't someone you know at all. Trust me." Alison's words had a little bite to them, but Emily just rolled her eyes and looked elsewhere.

"Maybe you should tell us her name at least. So you and Emily can make sure you aren't hooking up with the same girls. You know since Emily has multiples." If those words came from anyone but Mona, Emily would have got offended, but Mona was just speaking logically as she always did.

Emily's laughter rang through the tree house as her friends gave each other quizzical glances. "There is NO way Alison and I are hooking up with the same chicks, I would know."

"So anyway," Alison interrupted Emily's laughing fit. "I met this girl one day while I was walking near that stream about three miles from here. We got to chatting and she told me she liked the ladies."

"And." Mona prodded.

"And we went skinny dipping."

"You went skinny dipping with a perfect stranger?" Paige asked, bemused.

"Yep. She was hot and the weather and water were perfect. Then...I made my move."

"Move? What kind of move?"

"Mona, don't act like girls can't have moves. I just swam close to her and kissed her."

"What?! A stranger?"

"Relax Mona." Paige said. "She was a hot stranger, weren't you listening?" They all chuckled. "Go on."

"She kissed me back and I slid my hand down her body. Then I fucked her right there in the middle of the stream. I had her screaming my name so loud she probably scared the animals." Alison's smile was smug and Emily's was wide. Alison had in fact told her to say her name and she probably did scare anyone or anything within a five mile radius. "We've been hooking up ever since."

"She any good in bed?" Questioned Emily.

"A. Fucking. Mazing, actually." She lifted her eyebrow at Emily.

"Okay." Mona apparently wasn't done with her inquiries. "You said you, uh, you-know-what her. How?"

"I fucked her with my fingers." Alison held up her pointed and middle finger.

"Ah, I see."

"Want a demonstration?"

"What?! No!" All the girls laughed at Mona's overreaction.

"Jesus Mona I was just kidding." Alison said between giggles.

"Yeah, yeah. Whatever."

"So Emily,"

"Yes Paige?"

"Your girl, or girls. Dish."

"Uh, well one girl goes to our school, and no I'm not telling who because that's between us and it's no one's business. And the other girl is much older than me. She's out of college."

"What's her name."

"That's none of anyone's business either Ali. Anyway, I met her, uh, while I was playing the piano. At the mall, and we hit it off. But she took like forever to show any real interest in me. Today I went over to her house and she fucked me. And left a passion mark apparently."

"She you know what..._you_?" Mona's face was contorted in confusion.

"Well yeah, I had to meet you guys so we only had time for her to do me." The lies that were spilling out of Emily's mouth tasted like acid. The truth was she would have been with Spencer all day and night if she hadn't got so upset with her.

"_Do you_?"

"Yeah Mona. She fingered me and then she gave me the best head of my life."

"Excuse me for a second guys." Alison got up and walked to the bathroom. She shot Emily a look before she closed the door behind her.

X

Sitting on the bed, naked, and confused was all Spencer could do. It had been over an hour and she hadn't made any attempts to move from the spot Emily left her in. Her brain was racing with too many thoughts to sort, so she didn't move, she just stayed put to think. Guilt was the main subject on her mind. She felt so incredibly guilty for having sex with her underage student. She felt guilt flood her entire body because she just couldn't control herself. She had feelings for Emily. It was the unavoidable conclusion. Everything she felt for Emily proved to her that you can not control your feelings, if she could she wouldn't have thought twice about Emily, not in this way at least. Fear was the other emotion plaguing her. What if Emily told one of her friends? What if the girl's parents found out. Her career would be over and she'd have to register as a sex offender. This was bad, this was the worse thing she's ever done. But unfortunately she was falling in love and had been since she heard her sing for the first time. _If only Emily was older_, the stray thought made her chest hurt. None of what she was feeling mattered, she couldn't carry on with Emily. Her phone broke her out of her trance.

She hoped it was Emily and she didn't know why, but it wasn't.

"Hanna, hey."

"Hey hot stuff, have you given our discussion any thought."

Truthfully, she hadn't. "Yeah. Han, I'm not sure it's a good idea. In fact I'm positive it's not."

"Spencer..."

"I deserve more than to have to share the person I'm with don't you think?"

"You deserve the world Spencer." Hanna said, sincerely.

"I'm not sure about that, but I'm sure we should remain just friends. I care about you so much and Abby, that little girl lights up my whole world. I don't want to lose you guys."

"You won't. You'll never lose us. I was just taking a shot in the dark. We had our time, we had our fun and as much as I'd like it to continue, I totally respect where you're coming from."

Spencer sighed in relief. "Great. but I have to go right now, I'm...I have some things to attend to."

"Okay Miss English. Wanna hang with me and the little one tomorrow?"

"Definitely."

"Okay I'll call you tomorrow and we'll make plans."

"Talk to you later Han."

"Bye."

Spencer sat on her bed in the same spot for another hour, lost in her thoughts. There was a plan that she needed to come up with, but she had no clue where to start. Her phone rang and once again she was disappointed that it wasn't Emily.

"Hello mom, to what do I owe the pleasure?" She asked sarcastically.

"Spencer I've been trying to get a hold of you for two days."

"Yeah well, I've been busy. What can I do for you?"

"Melissa had her baby."

"Oh? Okay."

"Please don't sound so enthusiastic about being an aunt."

"Don't worry mom, I'm not."

"You're unbelievable Spencer." Veronica Hastings hissed.

"I'm unbelievable? You don't even call me. You don't know anything that's going on in my life and you nor dad and especially Melissa care, do you?" Spencer didn't try to hide the fact that she was hurt.

"I'm not getting into this with you."

"Of course you aren't."

"Listen, there's a new life that can potentially bridge the gap. Her name's Emma."

"Oh God..."

"What? You don't like the name?"

"No, no...that's not it." _It's that Emma sounds way too much like Emily, the girl I have feelings for and just had some really inappropriate sex with_. But she couldn't tell her mom that.

"Don't you wanna know how much she weighed?"

"Uh..."

"Six pounds and eight ounces. Twenty one inches long, and she's beautiful. I want you to come here to see her and your sister."

"Maybe."

"Spencer, Melissa will be released in two days, I'd like you to visit your sister and your niece before they leave."

"Why? Will they be jetting off to St. Lucia once the leave the hospital?"

"Spencer..." Veronica sighed and Spencer could almost see her shaking her head.

"I can't just drop everything and come to Philly to 'visit'."

"Drop what Spencer? It's summertime, don't you teachers have off?"

"You teachers? Okay this conversation is over."

"Spencer wait. Will you at least think about it. Please. She's at Penn."

"I'm not thinking about anything. I have way more important things to tend to."

"More important than your family?" Veronica raised her voice.

"Family? That's real rich coming from you. You have no idea the day I've had. Hell the year I've had. You didn't even call me for Christmas."

"Spencer, we were out of the country."

"Whatever mom. You wanna know where I spent this past Christmas? In Hawaii, with my girlfriend and her family."

"You have a girlfriend?"

"Not anymore, shortly after she became my fiancé."

"My goodness, Spencer, you're engaged to be married? That's wonderful." She said, clearly excited.

"And here's where things get interesting mom, I don't have a fiancé anymore. The engagement lasted all of a week."

"Oh honey, I'm sorry, what happ..."

"Don't you see there's something wrong with the fact that I was engaged and you didn't even know?" By now Spencer had tears streaming down her face. "You weren't there for me when everything fell apart, you're _never_ there for me. You never have been and I've accepted that you never will be. Why the fuck did you and dad even have another kid after your perfect Melissa was born?"

"Spen..."

"Save it! And now you want me to just hop in my car and waste my gas to see your perfect little grand baby? I hope all of you are real happy together." Spencer hung up the phone and finally moved from her bed. She cried in the shower and came up with her plan.

**OKAY SO I STARTED A TUMBLR AND I'D REALLY APPRECIATE IT IF YOU GUYS WOULD FOLLOW. I THINK I'LL HOLD THE NEXT CHAPTER HOSTAGE FOR SOME FOLLOWS : ) (sgt-awesome)**

**THANKS AGAIN FOR THE CONDOLENCES, I'M NOT QUITE OKAY BUT I'M GETTING THERE. DEATH FREAKIN SUCKS AND I'VE NEVER DEALT WITH IT IN MY ADULT LIFE UNTIL NOW. I LOVED HER AND I MISS HER AND I HOPE SHE'S RESTING WITH GOD. THANKS FOR YOUR SUPPORT AND PATIENCE.**

**SO WHAT DO Y'ALL THINK?**


	32. Chapter 28

**TO THE PERSON WHO MADE ME FLIP MY LID, YES I FORGIVE YOU AND YES WE CAN BE FRIENDS. ALLOW ME TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE AFOREMENTIONED LID FLIPPING. I'M GOING THROUGH A ROUGH TIME.**

**OKAY...LISTEN, I WASN'T GOING TO HAVE SPENCER TELL ARIA BUT YOU GUYS INFLUENCED ME INTO IT WITH YOUR MULTIPLE REVIEWS (SEE HOW USEFUL THEY ARE?) ABOUT HOW YOU "CAN'T WAIT FOR HER TO TALK TO ARIA". SO...**

**PLEASE ENJOY THIS "FILTH" THAT I HAVE WRITTEN FOR YOU. (NO I'M NOT LETTING THAT ONE GO)**

A plan of action was required. A plan that had yet to be fully formulated. First step: talk to Emily. Have a long, frank discussion about what transpired and why it can never happen again, and make sure she doesn't hate you and will not tell anyone. How to actually accomplish such a goal was why she needed to meticulously plan how to go about it. What exactly, and how she'd say what needed to be said. Spencer wasn't sure what should follow that inevitable talk, so she needed to plan for multiple outcomes. Hopefully she wouldn't be met with much resistance from Emily, hopefully Emily cared and respected her enough to agree to her plan, whatever that might be. Perhaps she should play it by ear, she had no clue how Emily would react and they hadn't spoken yet. It's been a little over twenty-four hours and neither has budged in being the first to make contact. Spencer knew she had to suck it up and make the first move, she _was_ the adult after all.

The couch had become her temporary bed now that she couldn't step foot in her bedroom. In hindsight, she and Emily should have stayed put in the living room, then she wouldn't have to avoid her room like the plague. Every touch, every kiss, every moan all came flooding back when she went anywhere near the location their love-making occurred in. If you could even call it that. Even though the memories haunted her right where she sat, it seemed to be worse in that room, so she steered clear. She stared at the black television screen in front of her, slumped on her couch, thinking of how to solve the monumental problem in her life. A plan, she needed a plan beyond calling Emily and saying: hello. The banging on her door made her jump out her skin. She was so lost in her thoughts that the world had disappeared around her and the knocking on her door sent her crashing back to reality with a thud.

"Okay coming!" She threw her Eagles blanket off herself and stomped to her door, throwing it open to reveal a very frazzled Aria. "You have a key. Use it!"

"This is the worse day of my life! Seriously, a zombie apocalypse would be more welcomed than this nightmare." Aria fell face down on the couch. Spencer closed her door and walked to stand over her friend. She studied her for a moment, waiting for an explanation as to why the thought of the undead trying to eat their brains was more appealing than her current circumstance, this must be bad.

After Aria laid still, offering no words, Spencer pressed. "What's going on?"

Aria sat up and patted the cushion next to her for Spencer to join. "Ugh! Mike called me." It wasn't unusual for Aria's little brother to call. In fact he and Aria were exceptionally close, even though they were nine years apart. So Spencer waited for the other shoe to drop. "He was crying and I started panicking, I haven't seen or heard him cry since he was like five or six. Once he calmed down." She took a breath and closed her eyes. "He asked if he could come live with me."

"Oh." This was definitely bad. "What's going on at home?"

"My parents are getting a divorce."

This bit of information sparked a feeling Spencer hasn't truly every felt toward her best friend. Rage. "And you're just now telling me?! I get that you talk when you feel like it, hell I know you better than anyone else on this planet. But this Aria, what the hell?"

"I didn't know! I'm here in Rosewood just like you, okay? How the fuck am I suppose to know what's going on in Philly?"

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry." She paused. "You had no idea they were having problems?"

"Not end-our-marriage type problems." She said sadly.

"Wow, they've been married what, twenty-eight years."

"Yeah." Answered Aria, quietly. "But fuck them, this is about Mike."

"Why does he want to come live here?"

"Because mom and dad are fighting over who he's going to live with so he calls me crying, begging me to move here. He doesn't want to live with either of them and I can't say that I blame him."

"What did you say?"

"How the fuck am I supposed to tell my fifteen year old brother he can't come live with me?"

"Oh."

"Yeah...hence why this is the worse day of my life. My freedom, my precious freedom."

"It won't be so bad."

"Won't be so bad? How am I supposed to get my freak on with him around?"

"You could just go to Ezra's." Spencer pointed out.

"And leave him by himself?"

"Munchkin, he's fifteen not five, he can take care of himself. Plus I'm here, I can make sure he's okay if you're out and about." She had no problem looking after Mike, she loved him like a brother.

"Really?"

"Of course. And he's tall and athletic, we can get him involved with basketball or something at school. And we could put him in karate too, keep him real occupied so he doesn't get into any trouble, plus it'll keep him busy while you're _getting_ busy."

Aria smirked at her. "We?"

"Yes. We. He's family to me too and if he's coming to live with you that means he's as much my responsibility as he is yours. You're not alone munchkin." She pulled Aria into her side with her right arm and secured her other arm around her waist. "You're never alone as long as I'm breathing, I got your back. Same way I would if there really was a zombie apocalypse. Speaking of, we should go get some emergency possible-zombie-outbreak supplies, you can never be too ready." Aria laughed loudly and buried her face in Spencer's neck, allowing her to comfort her.

"Do you have any idea how much I love you?" Aria whispered.

"I have a little clue." Spencer smiled.

Aria pulled back so they could look in each other's eyes. "No. I'm serious." Her face told Spencer as much. "I love you so fucking much Spencer. I couldn't live without you. I know it. You're the best thing that has ever happened to me." Aria leaned into Spencer and placed a lingering kiss on her lips. She pulled back and smiled, then gave her another one.

Spencer smiled widely. "I love you too Aria, so so much." She held her tighter and Aria place her face back into the crook of Spencer's neck. "I'm not sue what I'd do without you either, we should make a suicide pact or something cause you can't die before me."

"Okay,iIf one of us gets sick, we take each other out."

"What if one of us dies suddenly?"

"Uh, I don't know...the other drives off a bridge or some shit. Poison our cereal, I don't know." They both chuckled lightly. "I do know my life would suck major donkey balls without you Spency. You have no idea. You really just saved my life. I've got no clue how to raise a kid."

"Munchkin, he's not a kid anymore, and you can't treat him as such. You have to treat him like a young adult. And have Ezra spend time with him, show him manly stuff."

Aria pulled back suddenly, jerking herself out of Spencer's tight grip. "You evil fucking genius! Yes! Why didn't I think of that. He can hang with Ezra and they can talk about...I don't know, scratching their balls and shit."

"Yes Aria, because that's exactly what guys talk about." Spencer commented dryly.

"Shit, I don't know what dudes talk about." Aria curled back into Spencer's side then her head shot up again. "Why are you living in your living room?"

How Aria could tell was beyond her, perhaps no one knew her better than the woman sitting next to her. She shouldn't be all that surprised that she could tell something was amiss. Aria wiggled out of Spencer's grasp.

"Uh, get to talking. What is it?"

Spencer groaned. She had absolutely zero intention of telling Aria what was going on. She wanted to fold it up, put it in a box, and stuff it in the back of her mind until she needed to retrieve the information. She didn't want to unload the contents just yet. But knowing Aria as well as she did, she knew there was no getting out of talking about it. About _her_.

"Aria. I messed up. Really, really messed up. Like bad. I could go to jail, bad."

Her eyes grew impossibly wide and fear spread across her beautiful features. "Oh God Spency what did you do? Do we have to like...hide a body or something? I'm not judging or anything, I'm down with whatever."

Spencer couldn't help the laugh that rip from her chest. She was laughing so hard at Aria's wild assumption that she had to hold her sides. She calmed down a little only to begin laughing again because her friend's face was so serious.

"Okay so you _didn't _kill anyone." She said skeptically. "Okay...what is it?"

"I had sex."

"Did you rape her?"

"Not exactly."

"What the fuck does that mean Spency? We aren't playing Taboo here so just spit it out. Why would having sex send you to jail and why has it made you camp out in your living room?"

"Because we had sex in there."

"Is it some weird 50 shades shit? Erotic asphyxiation or something? Which would lead back to having to get rid of a body."

"Aria. You're a strange girl."

"Says the weirdo that probably has whips and chains and handcuffs and ball gags and..."

"I had sex with Emily! And there weren't any whips involved." Spencer closed her eyes afraid of Aria's reaction. When she didn't hear anything she peaked at her with one eye. Aria's face was stoic as she stared straight ahead, seemingly lost in thought. Spencer opened her other eye and stared at what she assumed Aria was looking at. A long moment stretched between the two, both unmoving and silent.

"You had sex with your student?"

"Yes."

"Spencer," Aria turned to face her, her expression deathly serious. "How could you?"

Spencer shook her head and let a tear fall. She wasn't expecting this kind of reaction, not from Aria. "I thought you said you wouldn't judge. You said it would be 'hot'."

Aria's eyes changed from shock, to disappointment, to sadness. "I know what I said but I was just fucking with you. I didn't think you'd do it. I didn't think you'd actually fuck one of your students. I completely understand that you can't help the way you _fee _about the girl. You might not have even realized how you felt about her if I hadn't brought it up, but you _could_ help fucking her."

"I know." Spencer looked down at her lap, unable to continue to look in Aria's eyes. Aria had never once been disappointed in anything Spencer had ever done. The feeling of knowing her actions had let her best friend down were foreign and left an unpleasant aftertaste.

"How the fuck did she even know where you lived Spencer?" Aria's tone was accusatory and harsh. Spencer flinched at the question.

"I told you, Jenna is Samara's cousin."

"Right." Spencer knew Aria could piece together that Samara had been over and Emily had accompanied her, therefore she saw where Spencer lived. "I didn't invite her."

"But you let her in." Her tone was colder with every sentence.

Spencer nodded, ashamed. "I'm...it was a mistake."

"A mistake that has you afraid to go into your own bedroom. A mistake that could land you in prison, not jail Spencer, prison, if anyone found out, a mistake?" Aria huffed and shook her head. "A mistake is stepping on someone's sneakers, not fucking your student. That wasn't a mistake, that was an epic fuck up."

Aria's words had bite that Spencer had never heard. Sure Aria had yelled at her before, even slammed some doors in her face, but she wasn't yelling. She was calmly reprimanding her and she was sure she heard disgust. She fought her tears, there was no need to shed them, clearly Aria had no sympathy for the situation Spencer had gotten herself in.

"So she comes over you, stupidly as fuck, let her in, and y'all go from zero to boning in sixty seconds or less?"

"No, uh, we...I...I guess that's how it happened actually now that I think about it. She jumped me before I closed the door all the way."

"She jumped you, and...?"

"Kissed me."

"And you kissed her back?"

"Yes."

"This was your first kiss?" Spencer wanted to lie because she knew the next revelation would get her in way more trouble than she already was in.

"No."

"Fuck me Spencer! What the fuck? When?"

"A couple of weeks ago."

"A couple weeks ago?! What. The. Fuck? I could kill you! You swore to me after that Maya bullshit you weren't going to keep stuff from me!" She stood up and walked around the coffee table. She started pacing back and forth. "You're too damn close to you students Spencer! Especially Emily! I should have seen this sooner, maybe I could have steered you away from this shit." She seemed to be admonishing herself.

"I..." She truly didn't know what to say.

"Do you think she'll tell anyone?"

"I don't know."

"Well go find out! She's a sixteen year old girl Spencer, if you ignore her this could end up very badly. You have to talk to her, you don't have a choice." Aria walked to the door.

"Wait, where are you going?"

She paused with her hand on the door knob. She didn't turn around. "For the first time since I've known you, I don't want to be anywhere near you. It's not because you had sex with her. Hell, under different circumstances it _would be _hot. But I can't look at you or be here because you've done something that could ruin your life. And worse," She looked over at Spencer and her heart broke seeing the single tear sliding down Aria's cheek. "you've done something that could take you away from me."

Her head swayed from side to side with her eyes closed, as if she couldn't bear the thought. "Not just for a week or two, but if this gets out Spencer, you could go to prison, for years. I just can't believe you'd be so reckless with your freedom." She opened the door, pausing for a beat before she spoke again. "Mike will be here in three days. I won't be able to keep him away from you once he gets here. And I won't want to explain why I'm not talking to you so just give me this. Give me three days to process this and I'll talk to you then." Aria left, not leaving any room for her words to be interpreted as a request.

Since she was unable to sleep that night, she took a shower around six a.m., trying to wash away the images of sex with Emily. And the other images of Aria. It was six thirty by the time she was fully dressed with her phone to her ear.

"Hello?" A very groggy sounding Emily answered.

"Hello Emily. I'm sorry to have woke you but we need to talk and I can't sleep and..."

"No, no. It's okay."

"Good. Can we talk?"

"Come over whenever, I'm not doing anything. But the sooner the better. My mom's going to be home around noon."

"Oh, I thought we'd just talk on the phone."

"This isn't really an on the phone type of conversation, wouldn't you agree?" Emily countered.

"Yeah, I suppose so. Could I possibly come now?"

"Yeah. See you when you get here."

**HIT ME ON TUMBLR: sgt-awesome : )**

**BET NONE OF YOU WERE EXPECTING IT TO GO LIKE THAT...**

**THOUGHTS?**


	33. Chapter 29

**THIS CHAPTER IS DEDICATED TO COWTRIPPEDONTHEMOON FOR BEING SO ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT THIS STORY.**

**PLEASE ENJOY THIS CHAPTER EVERYONE, IF YOU LIKE FILTH THAT IS...**

**OH AND I WROTE THE FIRST LIKE 17 PARAGRAPHS OF THIS WHILE I WAS _HIGHLY _INEBRIATED, BUT I ENDED UP LIKING THE RAWNESS OF IT SO I'M PUTTING IT OUT THERE. (I WAS SUPER NOT SOBER THO...) ALSO, IF I'M BEING HONEST...THE SMUT MAY BE A TAD BIT DIRTY IN THIS...UH, SORRY IF THAT UPSETS YOU**

Walking up the Fields' steps and stopping in front of the door had Spencer's heart pounding. She had difficulty swallowing the lump in her throat as she raised her fist to knock. Her hand paused, just inches away from the wood, and she stood frozen. This moment could go any number of ways so she took a moment to silently pray for something positive. She blew out a shaky breath and knocked. Emily opened the door wide with a huge smile on her face. She moved aside to let Spencer enter. Before Spencer could say anything, Emily was on her way up her stairs. Spencer's heart rate increased even more when she got a good look at what Emily had on. The tiniest black track shorts were on her bottom and a ripped up baggy white tee-shirt covered her torso but bared her shoulders. It hung half way off exposing her right shoulder and most of her chest, she wasn't wearing a bra. A fact that Spencer didn't notice until Emily turned around and gave her a curious look.

"You want me to wait here, or...?"

"We can talk in my room." Emily said, sounding innocent.

"That's a very bad idea. Emily..."

"Spencer, we're in my house, at the crack of dawn, when I could still be asleep. _You _wanted to talk so _you _and I are going to talk where _I_ want to." She turned back around and climbed the rest of the stairs.

Spencer shook her head and eventually, seeing no other option, followed. Emily stood in her doorway and backed up when she saw Spencer approaching. She let her into her room and closed the door, then locked it.

"I'm sorry for being a dick, I'm just really grumpy first thing." She closed the short distance between them and tugged at the button on Spencer's jeans.

"Emily. No." Spencer gently put her hands on Emily's shoulders to stop the girl's movements. "We can't..."

"I know what you're here to say. You're going to say 'don't tell anyone and this can't happen again'." Emily mocked as she rolled her eyes. "And fine, that's perfectly fine, but there's just one thing." Emily glanced down at her hands and undid spencer's jeans.

"What?" Spencer let out, breathing becoming a hassle.

Emily unzipped her zipper and pulled Spencer closer to her by the top of her pants. She leaned down and pressed her lips to Spencer's ear before whispering. "I never got a chance to see how good you taste."

Spencer closed her eyes and moaned at Emily's words and bit her bottom lip when she felt the tip of Emily's tongue slid from the base of her neck to her jaw. Emily put her hands flat on Spencer's hips and inched her hand down, slipping them into the sides of her panties, with her lips still attached to Spencer's neck. Slowly, her hands moved down and Spencer's jeans and panties were just above her knees when she felt Emily's finger slid through her lower lips. She put her arms around Emily's neck and they made eye contact. Spencer was drenched and had mistakenly misplaced all her willpower. Truth be told, she had none when it came to the girl in front of her, that had already been proven at the apartment and this moment was only confirmation. Emily's finger slid up and down the middle of her clit slowly, then she started making tight circles. Spencer was growing frustrated with most of her clothes still on, restricting Emily's movements.

The emotional connection she felt with Emily began to confuse her. She knew she deeply cared about the girl, but when they touched it set her body alight in a way she'd ever experienced. Her heart began to beat harder, but not with fear or nervousness like before. But there was an unhealthy amount of anxiousness, and something else...happiness?

Chills shot up and down Spencer's spine when Emily cupped her and rubbed her hand up and down. The moisture that laid in Emily's hand when she pulled it back was a bit embarrassing. Emily studied her hand then took two long licks from her palm to her middle fingertip. Then she placed her finger in her mouth and pulled it out slowly, putting on a show for Spencer. Her center was invaded once again by Emily's lone finger.

Emily pulled her finger away again and smeared the wetness on Spencer's lips. She then took a long, slow swipe of Spencer's lips and moaned at the taste. She crashed their lips together and Emily began to nip at Spencer's lower lip, which earned a low groan from Spencer. Their hands moved about each other's bodies, trying to touch as much as possible. Spencer pulled at Emily's shirt, trying to get her as close as she could.

Emily's tongue slid between Spencer's lips and it was at that moment that Emily realized she had all the power when it came to this confusing situation with Spencer. The willpower Spencer lacked was more than evident to Emily. She kissed her harder after she came to a decision as to what she would do with her new found power.

A tornado of garments flew around the room as they frantically tore each other's clothes off. Spencer was on top of Emily propped between her legs after they fell back onto the bed. Emily roughly pushed Spencer's shoulders and in a flash, was laying between her legs. Her mouth descended Spencer's body non stop until she reached her goal. Emily had never wanted anything more in her life. The moan that traveled from deep within Spencer to fill the room was loud and full of satisfaction. Spencer was her instrument and she knew just how to play her. Emily worked her tongue deliberately as if she were a conductor instructing an orchestra. There were purposeful licks, precise execution of her lips wrapping around Spencer throbbing core. All of which had Spencer crying sounds of passion and gripping the sheets on either side of her.

Obscenities left Spencer's mouth in a string of incoherent ramblings. She chanted Emily's name as she grabbed the girl's hair and lifted her hips, making Emily moan at the proximity. Spencer was already close, Emily could tell so she plunged her fingers into Spencer. Her movements underneath Emily had become violent and erratic. Her hips thrusted into Emily's fingers and relenting tongue. The intensity with which Emily's mouth and fingers sucked and pumped, had Spencer seeing stars behind her tightly squeezed eyes. Since Emily never really talked during sex, she was pleasantly surprised at the next words she said.

She removed her mouth from Spencer. "Come for me baby." She said in a sultry tone that made Spencer oblige immediately. Spencer jerked and trembled as she came hard on Emily's fingers, which hadn't stopped moving yet. Emily kept her pace until Spencer orgasmed again five minutes later and ripped Emily's hand from inside her by her wrist. Her hand clasped Emily's wrist tightly as she attempted to collect herself after unraveling. She breathed shallow breaths and her whole body was shaking. Her lip was beginning to hurt due to how hard her was biting it. Slowly, she returned Emily's arm back to her, she rolled on her side and her whole body tensed. The clenching between her legs at her thighs squeezing together was euphoric. Emily touched Spencer's back which caused her to swat her hand away and move further over on the bed. After a few long minutes Spencer turned slightly to see a joyful and angelic expression on Emily's face. She was half expecting to meet a smug smile, but there was no arrogance anywhere to be found.

"Wow." Spencer breathed out.

"I'd have to agree." Emily's smile grew and she leaned down to kiss Spencer. Emily turned her so that she was lying on her back. She climbed on top of Spencer and they wrapped their arms around each other's bodies. Emily placed all her weight on Spencer and stroked her cheek with her right hand as their tongues moved together. Spencer's hand caressed Emily's back, while the other threaded through her thick hair. They kissed each other passionately for a couple hours.

Android's default ringtone woke both Spencer and Emily. The younger girl reached over her English teacher and answered. It was Alison, she wanted to hang out and Emily agreed they could meet in a half hour when her mom came home. Alison accepted and they hung up. Noticing the time when Emily spoke of her mother's return, Spencer hopped up before Emily finished her conversation.

"Some talk huh?" Spencer pulled her shirt over her head and smiled at the naked girl still laying in the bed. "I should go."

Emily pouted. "I know."

"Who was that, Paige?"

"Uh, no. Listen, in the spirit of full disclosure, that was a girl I'm..." She paused and looked around the room before her eyes landed on Spencer's again. "A girl who I'm having sex with." She rushed out.

"Oh?"

"It doesn't mean anything. She's just a friend."

"Are you going to maintain a sexual relationship with her?" Spencer asked too coolly for Emily to gauge whether she was angry or not.

"Um...not if you don't want me too."

"That wasn't my question."

"Uh..."

"I just prefer to not have sex with someone who's having sex with other people."

"So we're having sex now? Like...this is going to be an ongoing thing?" Emily asked with hope shining in her eyes. Spencer looked at down at the floor and shrugged. "Are you having sex with other people?"

"Not currently, no."

"Well then neither will I. You're the only one I want to do any of this," She looked at the bed beneath her. "with." Emily got off the bed to stand in front of the fully clothed Spencer. She pressed her lips to hers in a slow, tender kiss. "I care so much about you and I don't want this to stop. I'll never do anything to jeopardize your reputation or livelihood, I swear. I'd just like the chance..."

"The chance to what?"

"Do this...often." She answered honestly. Emily leaned in to kiss Spencer once more. The kiss was longer than the last and a little rough.

"I have to go Em. We'll...we'll talk later, okay?"

"Okay." Spencer didn't want to leave Emily, she rather they stay in bed all day. But Emily's mom was due any moment and that was an encounter she needed to avoid. "Wait Spence. Can I make a proposal?" Emily asked tentatively.

"I'm listening."

"How about I talk to Ali about our friends with benefits situation and come over to your place when I'm done. My mom will be catching up on sleep so she won't even notice I'm not around. We could spend the rest of the day making a wet mess in your bed." she said the last part of her sentence in Spencer's ear, with her naked body pressed against her.

"Emily, we really, really need to discuss some very important things." Spencer said as her hands moved to squeeze Emily's backside.

"Okay. We can talk, and then make a mess." Emily pulled back to face Spencer and smiled at her.

She squeezed harder. "Um...okay. Just, call when you're on your way. And we _will_ talk first. Understand?" She smacked her ass.

"You're the boss." Before Spencer could reply, Emily kissed her again. If there was one thing Spencer was certain of, was that she never wanted to stop.

XXX

Somewhere between Emily's house and her own, Spencer received a phone call. She had completely forgot her plans with Hanna. They met at an ice cream shop and headed over to Abigail's favorite park. Spencer sent a text to Emily letting her know she wouldn't been home for a while, but they could still meet later. Hanna sat on a bench and Spencer carried Abigail over to the swings. She pushed Abigail and smiled when the little girl giggle. Suddenly Spencer became aware of the battle her mind and heart were in. Her mind gripped her heart and tossed it to the ground, yelling that it was beyond wrong. Her mind told her heart that it's actions were immoral and would only lead to insurmountable trouble. The stubborn heart that dwells in her chest shot up to face the mind head on. The heart countered the mind's accusations with confessions of deep affection for one Emily Fields. The heart shoved the mind and pinned it to the ground, telling it that Emily caused feelings that were so strong, they couldn't be ignored. The mind struggled to get from underneath the firm hold it was under but the heart was much stronger. The mind threw a flurry of insults including accusing the heart of being foolish, impractical, and impulsive. The heart slapped the mind saying that love was never foolish, especially the kind of love that it felt for Emily.

After a little more squirming, the mind was able to kick the heart off of it. The heart went flying in the air and landed with a thud. The mind raced over and kicked the heart again, this time harder. The mind said it was illegal, stupid, and far too risky, no matter how it was feeling. It argued that the heart needed to be smart instead of selfish. The heart was kicked again. The mind stood over the heart, daring it to retaliate. The heart told the mind that it didn't know what it was like to feel because all it could do was think. The mind punched the heart, blood flew from it and it laid helplessly on the ground. Bending down, the mind quietly said the one thing that had the potential to break the heart's will: Aria. The heart began to weep, knowing how right the mind was, but not wanting to admit it. The mind continued its verbal assault. It told the heart that there was no way it could carry on with Emily and have Aria know about it, but it couldn't be hidden either. Aria wouldn't accept it, she'd be so disappointed and upset that the heart didn't have better control. The heart wept louder, knowing that every point that was being made was the absolute truth. Spencer saw her heart take another blow, this one, almost shattering the heart to pieces. The mind said that it was right and the heart was wrong, point blank, and that things will only get worse from here if the heart didn't take its words seriously. The heart looked up at the mind and said its final words, it was done with this fight. "How can love _ever _be wrong?"

"Higher, Miss English! Higher!" Abigail yelled. Spencer grabbed the bottom of the swing and pulled it back as far as she could, then let it go. The little girl squealed with excitement.

"Hey Abby, you wanna get on the slide with me?" Hanna came over and asked.

"Yes!"

XXX

Hanna pulled in front of Spencer's building and turned her car off. She glanced back at her sleeping daughter and smiled.

"God, she looks just like Caleb, like I had nothing to do with that." She shook her head and laughed. Noticing Spencer's spaced out expression, like it had been most of the day, she asked her what was wrong.

"So much, Hanna. So, so much."

"Wanna talk about it?"

"My heart hurts." She said simply.

"Why, what's wrong?" Hanna placed her hand on Spencer's arm, rubbing it soothingly.

"Aria is so pissed at me and I tried to make it better earlier today but...but I just ended up messing things up even more. It's like I can't even control myself anymore. Like my actions don't even belong to me and there isn't anything I can do about it." For the first time since Emily kissed Spencer, she cried about it. Not because of Aria, or because of the feud between her heart and mind. But because she realized what she's been trying to ignore, she doesn't just have _feelings _for Emily, she's in love with her.

"Hey, we all make mistakes Spence. I'm sure she'll forgive you, you've been friends forever."

"Yeah, she'll forgive me but..." Spencer took a breath, only to have it get choked by her sob. Hanna pulled her as close as she could with the middle console in the way. "She'll forgive me for what I've done but will she look at me the same?"

"Spencer, I gotta ask...what exactly did you do?" Spencer pulled away and contemplated telling Hanna the truth.

_I fell in love with Emily Fields_. "I fell in love with someone who's really bad for me. Aria...well I've been hiding it from Aria and she found out. Well, she questioned me and I was honest, finally. When I told her the truth she said she couldn't even be around me because I'm being so reckless. Which I am. Oh God, what have I got myself into?"

"Sweetie, what's so bad about this person?"

"That doesn't matter." Spencer wiped at her eyes. "She's just so wrong for me and the situation I'm putting myself in is...it's fucking dangerous."

"Spencer...you're scaring me." Spencer looked into Hanna's baby blues and saw an immense amount of fear.

"Shit, Hanna, I'm sorry. It's not _as_ bad as I'm making it sound. But there's no doubt that it is, in fact, a bad situation. One that has Aria hating my guts."

Hanna studied Spencer for a long moment and neither woman said anything. "Then end it."

"I can't." Spencer whispered and felt her mind attack her heart again for the sheer stupidity it's displaying. Throughout the last few weeks Spencer wasn't sure about many things concerning Emily, but when she admitted she couldn't stop seeing Emily, she knew that was the only thing she _was _certain of. That, and her love for Emily.

"I don't want to see you hurt Spencer and I'm sure Aria feels the same way or else she wouldn't have reacted like she has. You're not giving me the full story here and that's okay, but whatever _is _going on, ask yourself, is it worth the risk?" Hanna rubbed Spencer's back as she leaned forward to rest her face in her hands. They stayed quiet until Spencer sat back up and looked Hanna dead in her eyes.

"It's worth everything."

**HMMM...**

**OMG...OMG..OVER 100,000 WORDS : ) *DOES HAPPY DANCE**

**THOUGHTS?**


	34. This is Chapter 30

**YOUR GLOWING REVIEWS OF THE LAST CHAPTER (ONE IN PARTICULAR) IS TO BLAME FOR THIS SPEEDY UPDATE...**

"Hey mom." A freshly showered Emily greeted her mother when she heard her walked into their kitchen.

"Hi, Em. What are you making?"

"French toast. Want some?"

"No thank you, I'm just going to head to bed."

"Okay. Uh, if you wake up and I'm not here, don't freak. I'll be with Ali."

"Just keep your phone on and we won't have any problems." Her mom sat her pocket book down and started sorting the mail that was on the counter. Emily plated her two pieces of French toast and sat at the island. "Emily?"

"Hmm?" She hummed with her mouth full.

"I need to ask you something." She sat down beside Emily. "You and Ali...is there something going on...there?" Clearly uncomfortable, she avoided Emily's eyes.

"You want the ugly truth or a beautiful lie?" Pam's breath caught in her throat and her face morphed into one of pain. "Mom? What is it? I know that you're still struggling with me being gay so don't ask questions that upset you." Emily put her fork on her plate and turned towards her mom.

"It's not entirely your choice of lifestyle that has me...Sammy used to say that." She pulled a small picture from her scrubs and looked at it.

"What's that?" Pam turned the small photo around, it was the picture Samara had given her. "Do you carry that with you at all times?" Pam nodded. "Oh. You really miss her don't you?"

"So much. I honestly still can't believe she's gone. It just doesn't feel real. I keep thinking one day she'll ring the doorbell like mad woman and tell us she played a sick joke on us." Her smile was sad.

Emily hung her head and willed herself not to cry. In all the despair she lived in, her mom was taking it just as hard, but she wasn't there for her. "I'm so sorry you lost her mom. I know you two had a really special connection outside of me." She brought her hand to her mother's back. "And you...you saw her at the hospital, you saw them bring her in. I'm so sorry you had to go through that."

"Oh Emily..." A single tear rolled down her cheek. "It was like having two daughters. She was just so special, you know? We would talk for hours sometimes. Her mind was so beautiful. The first time I asked her about her home life she said, 'you want the ugly truth or a beautiful lie?'. Obviously I asked for the truth and boy was it ugly." She shook her head in disgust. "I always wondered how her parents didn't cherish her."

"Things got a little better towards...the end. Mom, you cherished her and that's what matters. And trust me, she cherished you too. The fact that she got more love from you in the year you knew her than she'd got all her life from her family was priceless. Trust me mom, she told me, all the time. And she was so scared for you to know the truth about us but she wanted you to regardless."

Pam looked at her daughter. "I think I recall you saying something along those lines when you told me about, uh...about the two of you."

"She wanted to be honest, and she was proud of us. I was the one who was chicken. Anyway, she was fearful that you wouldn't love her anymore."

"I would have never stopped loving her, like I could never stop loving you. Some things might have changed though."

"Like?" She asked, curiously.

"No more sleepovers that's for sure." Emily laughed. "Thanks for this talk Emily, I haven't truly dealt with this yet. I'm still holding on even though I know for a fact she's gone."

"You don't have to thank me mom." She rubbed her back. "We both loved her, we can talk about her."

"Okay. So, back to my original question."

"Right, so..."

"Give me the truth Emmy."

"We have sex."

Her face scrunched up. "You what?"

"Have sex?"

"But, so soon after Sammy?"

"Seriously? That's how you respond?"

"How am I supposed to respond? It was merely seven months ago, and you're having a sexual relationship already? And furthermore," She stood up from the stool. "You shouldn't be having a casual relationship like this at your age."

"Mom..." Emily groaned.

"Can girls even protect themselves?"

"Uh..."

"You don't even know do you? Yet you're sexually active? Seems you have things backwards. When did this start?"

"I don't know." She shrugged one shoulder and looked down at her cold breakfast. "Not too long ago."

"Well I don't want you to be alone with her."

"Mom, we've already done the deed. There really isn't much you parents can do to stop us hormonal teenagers. Sex will happen, it just is what it is." Emily left her stunned mother open-mouthed in the kitchen.

XXX

About a half hour later Emily walked into Alison's bedroom with the blonde on her heels. They sat on the bed and faced each other.

"So..." Alison attempted to give Emily a kiss.

"Let me stop you right there, I need to talk to you." She pressed her hand to her chest stopping her momentum.

"Okay. About?" She sat back and crossed her legs indian style.

"We need to remove the benefits from our friendship." The face that Alison made gave Emily the impression this wouldn't be a clean break.

"Why's that?" She asked quietly but it felt like the calm before the storm.

"Because, the other girl I told you about, I want to see where things can go with her. I can't do that if you and I are still...you know."

"Who's this girl?"

"I told you she..."

She narrowed her eyes and interrupted. "Cut the bullshit. Funny thing about being inside of a girl, it becomes easier to read her, and I know you're lying about her, why not just be honest?"

"Ali, I don't owe you any explanation. We're friends who fuck." Emily feared she'd have to be much harsher than she originally intended. Fact was, Alison _didn't _have any right to question her. She got up from the bed and glared at Alison. "Actually friends who _fucked_. I'm not trying to be an ass here but I told you from jump what this was and what this wasn't, did I not?"

"Yes but," She got up to stand in front of Emily, "I thought, we could...I don't know, see where this could go maybe."

Emily took a deep breath and blew it out through her nose. "We were never going to be anything more than friends Alison."

"All this time I thought you didn't want anything more with me because you were still trying to get over Sammy's death. What does this other girl have, that makes it okay to try again, that I don't?"

"She...she...I was interested in her before I even knew Sammy's name. It's taken me a while but I think I am finally ready to share a deeper connection beyond sex. But I want that with her."

"Why not me?" Alison was less than happy with the current topic of conversation, that much Emily could tell. However, she'd gone to Alison's with one thing in mind: Spencer. Nothing was going to deter her from ending things with Alison.

"Ali..."

"No Emily, I want to know." She said with a slightly raised voice. Emily let it slide since she knew she was hurting her friend's feelings.

"Alison, you're great but you can't feign fire."

"What? What the hell are you talking bout?"

"There are so many things you can fake with people, fire isn't one of them. You and I, we don't have that fire. That burning passion for each other and I can't pretend like we do. We don't get to decide who we have that connection with, it just happens and it's happened with Sp...her."

Alison folded her arms across her chest. "So what was I, just something to do until you found something better."

"Alison you're the one who came on to me!" She yelled. She was trying to handle the situation delicately, but Alison wasn't allowing it.

"I don't remember you pushing me away!" She shot back, getting into Emily's personal space.

"I'm a sixteen year old lesbian and my cute neighbor wanted to fuck me, what else would I have done?"

"Fuck you Emily."

"Already have." She turned to leave and was halfway down the stairs when she stopped. Plainly put, she felt awful. Alison was her friend and she'd just spoke to her like she was someone she didn't care for at all. After cursing herself under her breath, she walked back to stand in Alison's doorway. She was lying on her bed with her back to Emily.

"Ali?" When she received no response she walked over to the bed and laid beside her friend. She pulled Alison's back snug to her front. "I don't feel like me anymore. Honestly, I've been a mess since Sammy died." Her mouth was directly next to Alison's ear so she spoke softly, just above a whisper. "I thought I found my soulmate and she was taken away from me in the most unimaginable fashion. You can't begin to even _try_ to understand what that's done to me."

Alison backed into Emily so that their bodies were curved into one another's. Emily put her chin on Alison's shoulder and pressed their faces together. Turning around wasn't necessary for her to know Emily had begun to cry, the tears were leaking onto her cheek.

"I'm not sure that I've dealt with her loss properly, and I'm not sure that I'll ever stop loving her or thinking about her but..." She paused as Alison's hand gripped her own. "But I'm pretty damn sure about one thing, I'm in love with someone else and I think I've always been in love with her. Even when Sammy and I were together, I had feelings for someone else. That someone is finally giving me a chance and I don't want to screw it up. Can't you understand that?" Alison nodded and tightened her hold on Emily's hand. She turned her head slightly which caused Emily to have to lift hers. Alison kissed her and she kissed her back. After a few long, slow kisses, saying goodbye through the actiton, they got comfortable, and were both so drained, they drifted off to sleep.

XXX

For the second time that day Emily woke up to the sound of her phone ringing. She reached in her pocket and saw Spencer's name. Briefly, she thought of how she should change her name in her phone. The phone stopped ringing before she could press accept. Alison stirred in her arms and opened her eyes slowly.

"Em?"

"Yeah. We must have fallen asleep."

"Yeah..."

"Hey listen, I've got to get going." She sat up, stretched her limp arm, and rolled her neck. "Are we okay?

"Yeah Emily," she sat up as Emily moved off the bed, "we're good."

"Friends?"

"Friends."

Once outside Emily pulled her notifications up on her phone and hit her missed call from Spencer. It rang three times before she heard the voice she's been longing for.

"Hey Em."

"Hey Spence. You okay? You sound kind of down."

"Well...how soon can you get here?"

"I'm on my way." They hung up and Emily dashed to her porch. Her bike was in the back yard but Samara's bike was on the porch. She had left it there a few days before her parents brought her car. For a moment Emily stared at the bike, she felt conflicted about using her dead girlfriend's bike to go see her potential girlfriend. After deciding Samara would probably pat her on the back for sleeping with a teacher, all apprehension went away.

The twenty-minute bike ride was much-needed. Emily didn't know what Spencer was so upset about and she feared the worse. What if she told her they needed to stop, what if she regretted everything that's happened between them? She quickly decided she'd use the only weapon she had: seduction.

Swimming down her memory bank, her thoughts traveled to the first moment she laid eyes on Spencer. When the tall, slender woman walked in front of her desk to address the classroom, Emily could barely breathe. The sight of her was mesmerizing, terrifying, and breathtaking all in one. All summer long she'd been trying her damnedest to ignore her attraction to women, and she'd, for the most part, got it under control. Seeing Spencer destroyed what little progress she'd made. There was no denying that she looked at girls the way she should have looked at boys.

Just as she locked up Samara's bike to the rack just outside Spencer's apartment building, she heard her name.

"Emily?"

"Shit." She said under her breath then turned around. "Hey Jenna."

"How are?" She asked. Her tone was sorrowful and it made Emily's skin crawl. She hated people constantly asking how she was, especially right after the accident. People would talk to her like she was a child who lost her favorite toy and pat her shoulder like she was a family pet. People's condolences were unwelcomed as far as Emily was concerned and Jenna's were no different.

"Uh, I'm...I'm just taking it one day at a time." That seemed like the appropriate response. Emily wanted to distract Jenna long enough to think of an excuse as to why she'd be out in front of her building. Jenna reached for Emily and pulled her in for a hug, when she pulled back both their eyes were glistening. Emily had just about enough of talking about Samara for one day. First her mom, then Alison, now a family member of the lost girl, she needed to get away.

"God, I still can't believe it." She said distractedly as she looked at something over Emily's shoulder.

"Yeah..."

"So, what are you doing here?" There it is, the million dollar question.

"Well, I guess I just ended up here. Her bike's been sitting untouched on my porch and I took it for a ride. When I stopped I was here." She looked up at the building then back down to Jenna. "We spent so much time here last summer, I guess it was an unconscious destination." She shrugged and gave herself a mental high five for being so believable.

"That makes sense." Jenna bobbed her head up and down in understanding. "Well don't ride around too long without an actual destination, you might get lost."

"Good point, but I think I'll just go for a walk now and grab the bike later. I just need some time to myself."

Jenna looked sympathetic then gave Emily another hug. "Sounds good sweetie. Well, I'm off to meet Garrett, we're headed to AC, so..."

"Oh, have fun."

"I'll try. You take care of yourself Emily. And Sammy...she's watching over you, don't ever forget that."

"Not even if I wanted to."

"See ya."

"Bye Jenna." Emily walked in the opposite direction from which she came and waited until she saw Jenna drive past her to turn around.

XXX

Sat in her living room, Spencer bit her nails in nervous anticipation. She was waiting for the girl, she's not suppose to love, to arrive. Too bad no one told her heart not to fall in love with Emily because now she was completely helpless. She hadn't decided whether or not she was going to tell Emily how she felt, if ever. Emily didn't give her any clues as to what her feelings might be so Spencer thought it best to keep her emotions to herself.

Still, her thoughts ran rampant in the depths of her weary mind. This thing with Emily was a mistake anyway she sliced the pie. It was illegal, risky, dangerous, and wonderfully wrong. But when Emily smiled at her, the dangers of their affair looked like a bunny compared to the lion it actually was. When Emily kissed her, the whole world vanished and her heart beat heavily in her chest. Emily's touch. The feelings that flowed endlessly through her body when Emily touched her were incomparable to anything she'd ever felt with anyone.

When she fell in love, she couldn't tell you exactly, but Emily caused her to trip and fall somewhere along the way. Emily held a special place in her heart from the start and now Spencer knew why. The sound of her phone ringing snapped her out of the comatose like state her thoughts put her in. She looked at a text message from her mother.

I'VE CALLED YOU SEVERAL TIMES AND YOU HAVEN'T RESPONDED.

Another came in shortly after.

I DON'T APPRECIATE BEING IGNORED, ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU'RE THE ONE WHO HUNG UP ON ME.

Spencer continued to ignore her mother and sat her phone on the couch next to herself.

_Knock, knock._

Spencer leapt from the couch and jogged to the door. Not bothering with her peephole, she swung the door open.

The corners of her mouth turned up upon seeing the girl of her every waking dream. She looked scared and confused so Spencer pulled her in for a long, tight hug. The hug turned into a kiss without her realizing it. Right in the middle of her apartment hallway, where anyone could see, she was kissing Emily, deeply. That type of reckless abandon would have been very hot if it weren't for the loud gasp she heard. Emily's lips left hers and they both turned to see who had caught them kissing passionately.

"Oh no." Spencer sighed. There stood Hanna with a look of horror on her face and a bag of groceries in her hand.

** WOULD YOU BELIEVE ME IF I SAID I _NEVER _KNOW WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN BEFORE I WRITE IT? LIKE I HAVE AN IDEA ABOUT THE GENERAL DIRECTION OF CHAPTERS BUT THINGS JUST SORT OF TAKE A LIFE OF THEIR OWN... TBH I HAD NO IDEA HANNA WOULD CATCH THEM...**

**THOUGHTS?**


	35. Chapter 31

**I'M SORRY ABOUT HANNA. I REALLY DON'T WANT TO SOUND PRETENTIOUS HERE BUT AS AN ARTIST (YES, I CONSIDER STORYTELLING ART) YOUR ART DOESN'T BELONG TO YOU. IT'S LIKE ANOTHER PART OF YOU ENTIRELY AND IT DOES WHAT IT WANTS. I PERSONALLY STRUGGLED WITH WRITING THAT. I DIDN'T WANT THEM TO BE FOUND OUT SO SOON EITHER BUT...THIS STORY DOES NOT BELONG TO ME, IT BELONGS TO THE CREATIVE MONSTER THAT LIVES WITHIN ME. I'M MERELY A VESSEL FOR HER TO WORK THROUGH...HOPEFULLY YOU ENJOY WHAT SHE'S CREATED HERE...**

**I DON'T USE A THESAURUS OR ANYTHING, MAYBE IF I DID THIS WOULD BE "BETTER", I'LL THINK TO DO THAT IN THE FUTURE SO THAT I CAN "IMPROVE"**

* * *

Not knowing is always frustrating and just terrible. Not knowing the outcome and having to wait is worse. Standing in her hallway just outside her apartment door between two people she cared deeply for and not knowing what was to come, had Spencer's stomach in knots. Mentally, she cursed herself for not dragging Emily into the apartment the second she arrived.

Hanna looked back and forth between them and shook her head. Spencer wished she could read minds. Hanna looked down at the bag of groceries and walked towards Spencer, she silently held up the bag and Spencer cautiously took it. She handed the bag to Emily when Hanna walked back towards the elevator without saying a word.

"Emily, could you put this in the kitchen and wait for me?" She kept her voice even and her face void of emotions. She knew she couldn't show one sign of fear lest Emily would freak out. Emily nodded, took the bag, and disappeared behind Spencer's apartment door.

Hanna was patiently waiting for the elevator to arrive by the time Spencer caught up to her. The door dinged and opened. Hanna stood still and stared into the empty lift.

"Hanna?" The doors closed, minus Hanna.

Without turning around, she spoke. "So that's the girl?"

"Yes."

"How long has this been going on."

"Not long." She finally turned around and their eyes met. Neither said anything for a few long moments. "Hanna, I'm in love with her. I haven't told her yet, but I am."

"She's a minor." Her tone wasn't judgemental, it was matter of fact.

"And you think that fact is lost on me? I've tried to fight it..."

"Spencer..."

"Hanna I need you to understand. When you lost your daughter you did things that were reckless didn't you?"

The calm face of Hanna morphed into one of anguish. "Spencer, I had something traumatic happen to me, what the hell happened to you?"

"I fell in love." The two women fell quiet again. "You think I want this? If you do, you'd be dead wrong. Hanna please..."

She cut Spencer's plea in half. "Do you have any plans of ending this?"

"No." It was clear to her, she didn't want to let Emily go. No matter what.

"Is this worth your career and then some?"

"Yes."

"Spencer..."

"I thought I already made that clear to you in the car earlier. When I said this was worth everything, I meant it. If I lost everything but I still had her..." Her shoulders lifted in a shrug. "Please don't tell anyone."

Hanna looked downright offended. "I would never hurt you like that Spencer, honestly. The thought didn't even cross my mind. Just...just be careful Spence." She pushed the button for the elevator for the second time. "Can we finish talking about this later? I'm still...in shock."

"Whenever you want to talk, I'm here I mean we don't have to, or you could pretend like this never happened." Spencer tried.

"Not possible. It's just that now that I know specifically what's going on, we can actually have a conversation about it."

"Of course. So, I'll see you later?"

"Definitely." The elevator dinged again and Hanna stepped halfway in before leaning up to give Spencer a kiss on the cheek. "I hope you know what you're doing Spencer." She got into the elevator and their eyes remained locked until the doors closed.

"Me too." She said to elevator door.

This was less than ideal. Aria knew and it was costing her greatly already, but she knew her best friend would never out her. Hanna now knew and that brought on an entirely different set of fears. Even though she knew what Hanna tasted like, she didn't know her as well as she knew Aria. She didn't know for certain she'd keep this secret. After all, Hanna was in a position of power over Spencer, and her mother was the principle of their place of work. Hanna had a responsibility to her students, one that she was now blatantly ignoring for Spencer's sake. Right there at her elevator, she decided that if their relationship ever became public knowledge, she'd deny that anyone else ever knew. There was no need to bring Hanna and, or Aria, down with her. Her phone buzzed in her pocket.

_I thought I'd cook you dinner to cheer you up and we could chat, so put those groceries to use._

_How sweet of Hanna_, Spencer thought.

Back in her apartment was a pacing Emily. She was biting her nails but stopped once she realized Spencer was watching her.

"How much shit are we in?"

"Technically Emily," she started as she walked over to take a seat on her couch, "I'm the one who'd be in deep shit. Not you. You'd just be the student who banged your hot teacher. I'd be the one behind bars and orange is not the new black despite what the people of Netflix say."

"This isn't funny Spencer! Is she gonna tell or not."

"Not."

Emily breathed a sigh of relief and sat next to Spencer. "Wait. What was she doing here in the first place?"

"We were at the park earlier and I was completely out of it, she was going to cook me dinner to make me feel better."

"No, I mean what was she doing _here_? I didn't know you were close."

"Oh." _Shit. To tell or not to tell, that is the question. Maybe I could_... Spencer's inner monologue was interrupted by the girl to her right.

"Hello?"

"We're friends Emily."

"What kind of friends?"

"Emily..."

"Was there ever anything between you two because I can't imagine a 'just friend' not telling someone about this. Wait! Isn't she married?"

"It's quite a complicated marriage those two have." She sighed and figured she might as well be honest since Emily didn't seem like she was going to drop this. "We had a sexual relationship while she and her husband were separated. He found out about us and he asked her if they could try to piece their marriage back together. I told her she should and we let that part of our relationship go and remained friends."

Emily sat quietly and listened to Spencer. Once she'd finished, they just looked at each other. "Okay, so that's over?"

"Yes."

"And she won't tell anyone about us?"

"As of right now, no."

"What are we anyway?" Emily asked.

"That's what we should have discussed earlier today instead of having sex." Spencer smiled and felt relief to receive one back.

"I know, but... you're just so beautiful. I wanted to make love to you." She scooted closer to Spencer who rose from the couch.

"No Emily, none of that. We need to talk." She sat on her coffee table.

"So...what are we?"

"What do _you _want Em?"

"You. Everyday. Every which way." She smirked but Spencer frowned.

"Can you get your mind out of the gutter long enough to have a conversation about this?"

"Yes, I'm sorry. Spencer, I don't want it to be just sex, but I also don't think I'm ready to have a serious relationship yet. Not to mention we can't even have a _real _relationship until I'm eighteen."

To hear Emily casually mention their future filled Spencer with hope of just that; a future with Emily. Then again she could just be pointing out the fact that they can't have anything real therefore would be nothing serious. "So what do you want to do then."

Emily pouted. "Why are you leaving all the hard decisions up to me?"

"I'm not, I just...Emily, you're the one who started this thing and now I don't really know how to stop. I know what _I_ want so I need to know where _your _head is."

"What _do _you want Spencer? It seems to me you want me as much as I want you so..."

"I've enjoyed the times that we've been intimate. But like you said, the just sex thing doesn't work for me either and we can't hardly begin an actual relationship. For way more reasons than one." Spencer wanted to know what Emily felt for her but didn't want to ask out of fear. She knew Emily cared for her but thought that this was nothing more than an experience to tell her friends about one day. If Emily was here to use Spencer for her body, then she was more than a willing participant.

"So what do we do?" She put her hand on Spencer's knee. "I don't want to stop this, like at all."

"Me either Em."

"So then we don't stop and we don't worry about labels or anything else. We just enjoy each other's company, as much as possible." She slid her hand further up her knee, dangerously close to Spencer's center.

She stopped Emily's hand by laying her own on her wrist. "Whoa Em, I'm so spent, I seriously can't handle sex right now."

"What's wrong." She retracted her hand as she sat up straight.

"I'm just so emotionally drained and we still have some talking to do."

"About? I mean, I'm pretty sure we covered the important parts."

"Emily, this is very serious. How we behave around other is crucial to not being found out."

"Right."

"So I'll repeat this, you can't tell anyone. Not another living soul. Aria already knows and now Hanna. That's two too many already so..."

"I understand."

"Good. Also, you should change my name in your phone."

Emily smiled to herself as she pulled out her cell, recalling the moment she thought of doing what Spencer just told her. "Okay..." Her finger slid across her screen and tapped a few times before she put it back in her pocket. "Done, anything else?"

"What did you change my name to."

Emily laughed like a joke was just told. "That's for me to know and you to probably never find out."

"Anyway," her eyes rolled at the still giggling Emily, "we can only do stuff here from now on okay? I don't want to chance your mom catching us. At school...just act as you always have. Try to refrain from lingering looks and googly eyes."

"I don't know how I'll ever manage." Emily teased.

"I'm serious Em..."

"So am I. But, I will try to not look at you like I want to rip your clothes off, which is more than likely exactly what I'll be thinking of."

"Nice. Also I suggest you stay away from Aria."

"Why?"

"She's probably hates your guts."

"Why?" Emily was alarmed at the thought of Spencer's best friend hating her.

"Because, she sees you as someone who can really hurt me. Not just emotionally, but, well, I don't have to repeat everything I could lose because of this." Her finger swung back and forth between their bodies. At that very moment Emily set her mind on doing any and everything she could to make sure no one would find out about them until it was too late to do anything about it. Which wouldn't be until her graduation day but she was willing to put in whatever effort and hard work she had to, in order to protect Spencer.

"She's just looking out for me." Spencer continued. "And she's less than thrilled with what's going on. She won't even speak to me."

"Oh Spence, I'm so sorry."

"It'll be fine. I'll see her in a couple of days and hopefully we'll hash everything out. I mean we will, there is no other option."

"Good." She paused and rubbed the back of her neck. "So, no getting freaky anywhere but here, don't alert anyone about us, due to behavior, and don't tell anyone anything."

"Exactly."

"What if we get caught?" She didn't really _want_ to ask the question, but it'd been nagging her since the very first kiss in Philadelphia, where anyone could have easily seen them. Spencer's sudden and obvious discomfort sent a pain through her whole body and made her regret asking even more.

"Deny, deny, deny. Unless someone has proof, we tell them they're crazy."

"Sounds like a plan." Emily stood and lifted Spencer to her feet as well. "I guess I should let you get some rest."

"You don't have to leave." She leaned in to kiss Emily. The soft touch of Spencer's lips lifted Emily from the ground.

Pulling away was harder than she imagined. "Actually, if I stay here I'll probably rape you so...I should go."

Spence laughed loudly and she laughed even harder when she looked at Emily's serious facial expression. "Okay. Will I see you tomorrow?"

"Ugh, I'll be in Philly tomorrow with the girls, we're going to the Phillies game and we'll more than likely make it an all day thing. The day after that?"

"I'd love to but I'm helping Aria and her little brother move his things up here from Philly. The next day?"

Emily thought for a moment that maybe it would be very wrong to spend the day making love to Spencer on that specific day, but she couldn't resist. "Perfect."

Their goodbye kiss lasted a long time before Emily found the strength to leave.

* * *

The doorbell intruded upon Emily's Keeping up with the Kardashians marathon. For a flicker of a moment she thought maybe it was Spencer because she couldn't keep away, but she knew better. Who stood on the other side of her front door shocked her into silence. She didn't know how to greet him, she didn't know why he was there. Most of all she didn't know how seeing him would make her feel, she hadn't even thought about it. But the moment their eyes met she felt like bursting into tears. It was too hard to look at him, the reminder too heavy. This was far worse than her encounter with Jenna earlier, this was painful in a way she hadn't expected.

"What are you doing here?" She asked after the silence became awkward and he didn't seem to be in any rush to speak first."

"I really need someone to talk to."

He sounded so wounded and she thought if she spoke too loud or made any sudden movements, he'd shatter. He looked pale, frightened, and his eyes were puffy as if he'd been crying, so Emily didn't have it in her to dwell on _her_ varying emotions. She gently shut her door and gestured for him to sit on their patio set. She took a seat right by him and angled her body to face him slightly. He stared straight ahead and Emily noticed his lip quivering.

"Hey, tell me what's going on Noel." He looked at his dead best friend's bike that Emily had haphazardly laid on the porch.

"Out of all the things you could have taken, you opted for her ten speed?" He looked at Emily, his eyes showing the tiniest bit of amusement.

"No, well she left it here like a day before she got her car and every time she said she'd take it home, she never did."

"Oh." His heavy sigh reminded Emily that he was at her house with a burden weighing him down.

"So...what is it you need to talk about."

"If Sammy was here, she'd know what to do. She'd talk me down off the ledge."

"Why are you on a ledge."

"Emily I wanna jump. I wanna disappear."

"Noel..."

"I got a girl pregnant."

"Why weren't you using protection?" She hoped she didn't sound as judgmental as she felt.

"We did, we were. Just not every time." Tears welled in his eyes. His eyebrows furrowed in sadness. "My mom is going to kill me." He sounded genuinely petrified.

"Noel, sometimes these things happen. I'm sure she'll be upset but..."

"No. You don't know my mom. She'll give me two options. Marry the girl or I die. She's crazy religious. If she knew I was having sex..." He trailed off, shaking his head as if he couldn't bear the thought of his mother knowing he's sexually active. "She's going to kill me Emily and I don't know what to do."

Teenage pregnancy never crossed Emily's mind. One of the many perks of being gay, so she had no idea what to say.

"I could always... take care of it." He said slowly.

"I hope you aren't suggesting you ask this girl to get an abortion."

"Emily, what the hell else am I supposed to do? Tell me what to do." Pleaded Noel.

"Listen Noel, I can tell you that I don't believe in abortion unless in extreme cases such as rape or incest. I could say that you shouldn't ask her to terminate the pregnancy because you both were too stupid, lazy and or horny to get a condom and that abortions should not be used as contraception. I can say that you should talk it out with her and her parents and your mom. I can give you my opinions all day long but bottom line, this isn't just about you and her. There is an innocent little life involved now and I can't make any decisions for you." He nodded thoughtfully. "You have to man up and work this out, no matter the repercussions because an unwanted pregnancy because you didn't strap up is only the beginning."

"Emily, I'm only nineteen, I'm not ready to be a father."

"What does the girl want?"

He sighed and his shoulders slumped forward. "She wants to keep it. She doesn't believe in abortion either."

"So then how were you planning on making her get one?"

"I don't know. All I know is this shit isn't fair. If I wanted to keep the baby and she wanted to have it aborted then I get no say. But she wants to keep it and I don't and I still get no say. This shit is ridiculous. Did you know that a man sued his wife or something because he didn't want her to terminate and the supreme court ruled that men have no right to say whether or not his child is born?"

"No. I didn't know that. You're right, that isn't fair at all, but it's the reality we're in. Reality is that a girl you were sleeping with is now expecting your child, you have to face that Noel. I'm sorry this is happening to you, but it is."

Noel gave Emily the strangest looked which caused her to look away. When he didn't say anything but continued to look at her, she returned his gaze. "What?"

"You and Sammy. I just never understood you two. Sitting here talking to you, I'm even more confused now then I was when y'all were together."

"What's there to understand? We fell for each other."

"Yeah, yeah I know. But you two are like night and day. You're so different from one another."

"Were."

"Huh?"

"Past tense Noel, we _were _different." Emily didn't mean it how it sounded, she was just so tired of talking about Samara.

"I'm sorry." He spoke, quietly.

"No, I am. You lost your best friend and at one of the most troubling moments in your life, you don't have her. That sucks."

"It does. I guess that's why you're the first person I thought to talk to. Seeing you and talking to you...it somehow makes me feel close to her."

Emily couldn't agree more. That's why it was so painful opening the door and seeing him and even more painful sitting next to him. "I know what you mean. So...what are you going to do?"

"Pray to God my mom doesn't chop me up and hide my body Dexter style."

"Noel..." She laughed and he joined her.

"I'm scared Emily." He admitted once they stop laughing.

"I know." She put her arm around his shoulder and tried to comfort him. "The Bible says that every child is a gift from God. You may not be ready but that baby is ready for you. Everything is already planned Noel. From before you're even born so God knew this would happen, and he knows you won't screw it up."

"How can I do anything _but _screw it up?"

"Because God doesn't give us more than we can handle."

"I really don't know about that. I'm not exactly handling Sammy's death that well."

Before she responded, she thought long and hard about how difficult losing Samara was. She thought about how everyday it gets a little easier but the pain never really goes away. "Mother Teresa has this quote. It says 'God doesn't give me more than I can handle, but sometimes I wish he didn't trust me so much.' I think that's what these moments are, God trusting us...a lot. Losing her is the most difficult thing I've ever dealt with, I'm still dealing with it, but he trusts me and I'm still here, you're still here. Life is hard but I'm grateful I wake up everyday no matter what gets thrown my way. I'll help with the kid, no matter what I can do, I'll help. You're only at Hollis so I can see the kid when you do, maybe not leave you alone with him or her all the time, until you get used to it."

"You'd do that." The appreciation in his eyes told Emily she was doing the right thing by offering to help.

"Absolutely."

"Emily, I don't know what Casey would think about this but I'd like you to be the kid's God mom."

"What? You serious?" The smile playing on her lips dared to break free.

"If Sammy was still alive, you'd both be the kid's God Moms. So, yeah."

"Well I hope this Casey is okay with it because I'd love to." She wrapped her arms around his neck and he eagerly returned the gesture.

"Noel?" They let each other go to see Emily's mom walking up the steps. "Is everything alright?"

"Yeah, Noel just needed someone to talk to."

"Ah, say no more. It's nice to see you Noel,you haven't been around in some time."

"I know."

"How's school."

"Classes are great."

She smiled at him. "That's excellent. Would you care to stay for dinner, I'm making lasagna."

"My favorite, I'd love to stay, thanks Mrs. Fields."

"Why don't you two go inside and watch TV while I cook?"

"Okay." The said in unison.

* * *

There was this feeling of flying, like she was suspended in air, soaring above Rosewood, completely untouchable. That's how Emily made Spencer feel. They'd just hung up after an hour-long conversation about all the things Emily wanted to do to her the following day. Spencer would have never pegged Emily for the sexual deviant she clearly was, but she wasn't complaining. Today was the second day in a row that they wouldn't be able to spend any time together and the feeling of flying turned into something empty. A bottomless hole that she fell deeper into the longer they were apart. Now that she was risking it all to have whatever it was they had, she hated being away from Emily. She couldn't dream up what it'd be like once school began a week and a day from now.

Knock, knock.

"Just a minute." Spencer wiped the goofy smile off her face and opened her door. Aria walked in, without speaking, and walked into the living room. "Hello to you too."

"Did you end it?" They stood not too far apart, eyes battling.

"No. And I'm not."

"Fuck. You're a fucking idiot."

"Thanks, I love you too." Aria closed the space between them and wrapped herself around Spencer. Shocked at the sudden embrace, Spencer had to gather herself before she returned it. Aria pulled back and pulled Spence down to her mouth, peppering her face with kisses. Spencer pulled Aria closer by her waist, relishing being so close after three too many days apart. A dozen or so kisses later, Aria pulled away.

"I _do _love you and I'm scared shitless this will blow up in your face. But I've known you for sixteen years and I know you're going to do what it is you want regardless of how anyone, including me, feels about it. I'll just pretend like it's not happening."

"That's the route you wanna take?"

"I just can't Spence...I can't be actively aware of something so dangerous."

"I'm in love with her."

Aria stood on her toes to pull Spencer closer. "That's what's so dangerous." She spoke into Spencer's hair. They stayed intertwined for a long while before Aria peeled herself away.

* * *

The only sound in Aria's car was her radio, blasting Lady Gaga. Spencer didn't care for the singer in the slightest and Aria often avoided playing her music. She could only guess that her best friend was trying to annoy her. _Twenty more miles and I can get away from this music. Twenty miles, that's it._

Grateful couldn't begin to cover Spencer's mood when Aria turn the radio off, although the acapella version of Born This Way that was playing wasn't half bad, she still was happy it was over.

"I've tried really hard to fight myself about this."

"About what?"

"I have a question about that which shall remain nameless."

"And?"

"And a part of me doesn't want to ask and another part of me needs to know."

"Know what?"

Aria let out a frustrated groan. "Come on Spencer, you know what I want to know. As much as it's killing me to even think about asking, I have to know."

"Know?" At this point, Spencer was simply playing with Aria. She knew exactly what she wanted to ask.

"The sex Spencer."

She tried so hard not to laugh but she failed. Aria's hard glare helped stifle her laughing, but she had to cover her mouth to hide her smile. A few soft chuckles left her against her will. "Okay, okay." She choked back her laugh again. "Okay, um, what is it you want to know?"

"How was it?" The question was asked through clenched teeth.

"Amazing."

"Well duh, if you're making it with a damn sixteen year old I'd have to assume it was good. I'm talking details Spence."

"I thought you didn't want to talk about this."

"You know I can't help myself, just tell me already."

"Well...the first time was unbelievable. She jumped me while I was sitting on the couch. We started kissing real passionate like. Mmmm...anyway I picked her up and took her into the bedroom. We undressed ourselves. You know she did one of the nastiest things I've ever seen."

"Which was?" The anger and irritation was thankfully absent.

"She rubbed her wetness and smeared it on both her nipples."

Aria's face scrunched up. "Fuck...that's hot. And then?"

"I was a mad woman after that. I went straight for her nipples of course. At some point I started freaking her, it was like my hand had a mind of it's on. I was really...rough. I guess it's because I was mad at the situation. Still am."

"How do you mean?"

"I mad that I'm her teacher, I'm mad that I fell for her, I'm mad that she's the age that she is. I'm just mad about it all."

Aria bobbed her head in understanding. "You're really into her huh?" The way she asked the question made Spencer think that maybe Aria didn't believe how strong her feelings were until that moment.

"Yes munchkin, I really, really am."

"Where can this go Spencer?" She sounded very tired of Spencer's current sort of relationship. Not that Spencer blamed her.

"We'll just have to see."

* * *

Emily rolled on top of Spencer giggling before her face grew serious. She stared at Spencer like she was the most beautiful piece of art she had ever seen. To her credit, Spencer didn't question Emily's gaze, she simply offered her a sweet smile. Emily started placing soft, loving kisses all over her face. Starting with Spencer's eyes, moving to her cheek, then the other, her nose, her forehead. She pulled back and smiled down at her. She ran her hand down Spencer's rib cage and enjoyed the feeling of their naked bodies rubbing against the other. Right before she was about to tell Spencer how gorgeous she thinks she is, Spencer's phone rang.

"Ugh." Spencer deadpanned. Blindly, she started reaching for her phone which was attached to her charger on the night stand, without taking her eyes off Emily's. Once in her grasp she didn't look at the caller I.D. and just pressed the green button she saw in her peripheral.

"Yes."

"Spencer, what on earth is wrong with you?"

"I don't know mom, but I have the sneakiest suspicion you're about to tell me." Spencer replied with a hefty amount of sarcasm.

"You never showed up at the hospital and Melissa has been home for a three days now. We haven't so much as heard from you and you haven't made any attempt to see or talk to your sister. You have a niece now and she did nothing to you. She's an innocent life who deserves to know her aunt." She lectured.

Spencer stayed quiet for a breath and a half. "You done?" she asked, coarsely. "That was a great speech, it really, really was. However, I'd have to respectfully decline your invitation. I'm in the middle of something," she licked her lips at the look Emily gave her. It was full of yearning and lust. "I have to go." She hung up without a second thought and pressed her lips to Emily's, hard.

* * *

Their afternoon was filled with passionate love-making, they were on round eight when a loud knock at the door interrupted them. Spencer cursed the air but got up and put her robe on. It could only be one of two people, each of which knew about Emily, still, she didn't want them to see anything involving their sexual activities.

"Put your clothes on."

"Just get rid of whoever that is, come back in here and fuck me...hard."

"Where have you been all my life?" The question was rhetorical, but she really did wonder. "As tempting as that sounds...put your clothes on." She left the room, closing the door behind her.

Mike Montgomery's shaggy jet black hair was all she could see through her peephole.

She opened the door and smiled at two of her favorite people in the world. "Any reason you literally never use your key?"

"I left it upstairs." Answered Aria.

"Of course you did." She scoffed. "How are you settling in Mikey?"

"Great. Thanks for all your help Spency."

"Anytime."

"So...I was thinking you guys could hang out, I've got some...things I need to do."

"Sure. We can play Halo since your sister won't be around to complain about it."

"Hell yeah."

"Don't say hell." Aria chastised.

Spencer balked a loud laugh. "You said way worse when you were like ten."

"Shut the hell up." Both Spencer and Mike laughed.

"Mikey, why don't you walk your sister to her car, make sure she gets there safe."

"Spence, it's Rosewood, it's so safe here there's only like two police officers."

"One, that's a hyperbole, two, I'm not _decent _in here and need to get myself together." Spencer titled her head a bit and raised her brows when she said 'decent', hoping Aria would take the hint. Of course with their connection, Aria caught on right away.

"Oh, yeah. We'll let you get _decent_."

"I'll be right back Spency."

"Ok Mikey."

Spencer rushed into the bedroom and gave Emily an appreciative smile. Then an appreciative kiss, which turned into a mini make out session. "Damn, you've got to go before Mike gets back."

"I know." Kiss. "I really don't." Kiss. "Want to leave." The next kiss involved Emily's tongue caressing Spencer's.

"I'm sorry."

"It's alright, I have somewhere I really need to be anyway."

Suddenly she felt hyper aware that it wasn't her place to ask where Emily "needed" to be, although the desire to know was strong. "Okay. I'll talk to you later?"

"Yeah, just call me when you're done being a Halo geek."

"Whatever." One last kiss and Spencer watched Emily go.

* * *

"So I have some Reese's cups, some Vitamin water triple X, because you're a perv, and a double chocolate cupcake. I know that's your favorite."

Sat with her back against Samara's tombstone, she pulled out all the goodies she brought. A large part of her didn't want to go see Spencer today, but her teenage hormones won out. When Samara passed away she promised herself she'd go to her grave once a week. At first she was there four times a week, which turned into two, until she could finally handle gong only once. Today however was a special day. Samara's eighteenth birthday and Emily wouldn't have missed it for the world. She thought of all the promises of the future that died along with Samara but them spending her eighteenth birthday was one promise Emily couldn't ignore.

"Okay so I have something to tell you. I'm not sure if you know already or anything but I think it's best to be honest with you." She took a deep breath. "I'm having sex with Spencer...Hastings. I know, she's my teacher and we shouldn't be doing this but... Sammy, the thing is, remember when I started asking all those questions at our very first sleepover and I wouldn't tell you who I was crushing on? Well it was Spencer, it _is _Spencer. My crush on her never went anywhere but I ruled out the possibility of us. She is my teacher after all. Never in a million years did I think she'd go for me, but here we are."

She turned her head to look at the tombstone. She sat the Reese's cup on top of it and turned back around, taking in the graveyard.

"Well, yeah Sammy, I do love her. I'm sorry, I love you too but...do you want me to lie to you? I love her. What? No Sammy, no one is better than you. You taught me everything I know. What we shared can never be duplicated so don't even worry about that okay?"

Whenever she visited Samara's grave, she'd talk to her like they were holding a conversation. The one time Pam accompanied her, she gave her quizzical looks for about a week after. She didn't care though, it made her feel close to her. It gave her peace.

"I miss you too. It sucks that I'm starting school without you. I know you would have aced senior year. Oh yes you would have, I would have made sure." Her smile faltered. "Sammy? You aren't suffering, are you? Just give me a sign or something."

Two minutes of silence passed before Emily thought to say anything else, but just as she opened her mouth a large Tiger Swallowtail butterfly landed on Samara's candy. It's wings were yellow with rich black spots streaking through them, at the bottom were sky blue spots. The way it's wings fluttered seemed to be in slow motion. It stayed on the candy for what felt like forever, then it flew away.

"Holy shit Sammy, was that...you? I knew you were alright, I knew it." Emily's face hurt with the intensity of her smile. Her heart felt at ease for the first time in a long time. "Since you came to see me, does that mean you aren't mad about Spencer?" She paused, waiting for an answer. "I love you Sammy, you're the best. I gotta be honest, I was really nervous to tell you. Okay, how about we get this birthday celebration going huh?"

Just as she reached in her backpack for the rest of her supplies, she saw a familiar car pull up near Samara's plot. She squinted her eyes and horror took over her joyful mood in an instant. The driver stepped out the car and walked towards Emily.

"Miss Montgomery?"

"Please, after you've fucked my best friend, I'm sure it's okay for you to call me Aria." She wasn't hiding her displeasure, not in the slightest.

"You don't seem too happy about that."

"You could ruin her life." she sneered.

"Why would I do that. I love her."

Aria scoffed and put her hand on her hip. "Love? You're a child, she's an adult."

"We aren't that far apart in age." Emily reasoned with Aria the same way she reasoned with herself. Truth of the matter was Emily was nervous about their age difference. She felt fearful that someone older might come along and look like a better option. Now that she finally had Spencer, no part of her was willing to let go.

"She's three years removed from college, you're just about to start eleventh grade. I'd say that's pretty far. You don't know what the hell real love is."

Emily stood and mimicked Aria's stance. She felt a rush of dominance since she towered over her, but Aria didn't back down, she just moved closer. "So are you saying I didn't love Sammy?" She motioned behind her, that shut Aria up. "What are you doing here anyway?"

"I just wanted to bring her some flowers for her birthday." For the first time, Emily noticed the bouquet of white roses in Aria's hand.

Her heart softened thinking fondly of all the lives Samara touched, and she let her guard down. "You two were pretty close huh?"

"Not as close as you and Spencer. Stay the fuck away from her."

Her guard shot back up, standing firmly in place, readying herself for a possible battle. "If she wanted us to be apart, then we would be."

"Stay away from her Emily!" She shouted in the empty grave yard.

"What are you going to do about it." They stared each other down, until a thought hit Emily. "Oh my God, you're in love with her."

"I am. I'm in love with her in a way you could never comprehend."

"What's there to comprehend, you're in love with your best friend and you're trying to prevent her from being happy!" Emily spat.

"I'm not in love with her, not in _that _way. See this is what I'm talking about, you're little sixteen year old mind could never understand what she and I share. It's not romantic, it's..." Aria looked around as if the proper words could be found somewhere besides her mind. "Emily, it's the strongest thing I've ever felt, like she's my heart. You can't live without your heart you know. I can't breath without Spencer. I'd willingly walk straight to my death for her. I'd take a life if need be, I'd do anything for her. I'd do anything to protect her. You're damn lucky I can't tell your parents what's going on. That'd only hurt Spencer, but you need to leave her alone."

"Why?"

"Because your relationship is a crap shoot. Where the fuck can your relationship go Emily? Soon you'll be off to college and she'll still be here, living her life, paying bills, doing what grown folks do. You have so much growing up left to do and growth is fucking impossible with 120 pounds of extra weight attached to you." Emily's confused look spurs Aria on.

"What I'm saying is that you can't figure out who you are or grow as an individual when you're trying to figure out who you are as a couple. You have to focus on "me" before you can focus on a "we". Relationships take a lot of hard work, dedication and self-sacrifice. But Emily, how can you put yourself in that position when you don't even know yet what it is you're sacrificing?"

Emily thinks hard on Aria's words. Aria walked pass her and placed the flowers on Samara's grave. Emily watched her kneel down and say a few hushed words.

"You're too young and dumb to be with Spencer. That woman is very sure of who she is and what she wants out of life." She stood up and turned back around. "Do you even know what the fuck your dumb ass wants to major in?" Emily looked to the ground. "I didn't fucking think so. Idiot." Aria started walking back to her car. "Stay. The. Fuck. Away. This is your first and last fucking warning Emily Fields. Oh, and tell Spency about this talk...let's just say you'll regret it if you even think about it."

Aria sped off and Emily stood frozen for a few minutes. The initial shock of the unexpected encounter wore off so she sat back down. "I'm so sorry you had to hear that. What the hell am I going to do Sammy? You know what, I shouldn't bombard you with my problems on your 18th birthday." She reached in her bag and pulled out Samara's cupcake. She stuck a candle in it and lit it. The version of Happy Birthday that she sung was slow and jazzy. "Happy birthday Sammy." Emily blew the candle out as a tear traveled down her face. "I love you baby."

* * *

**THE NEXT DAY**

Standing outside the Hastings residence was a bit unreal for Spencer. Most of her adolescence was spent in a hotel style center city condo, so to see that her mom and dad purchased an actually home, stung a bit. To her knowledge, they became homeowners during her second year of college. She's never set foot in this house and was about to do so for the first time. Basically, she was an emotional mess. Staring at the doorbell, she briefly thought of fleeing, they would never know, they didn't even know she was coming. Since she'd driven all the way to Ambler, she sucked it up and rung the bell.

Veronica Hastings opened the door and her eyes lit up. Her smile spread wide across her face as the two of them looked at each other for the first time, in a long time.

"Spencer! My goodness." Her mom went to hug her but she moved her outstretched arms to the side and walked into the foyer. She looked around and was impressed with the double winding marble staircase.

"I know your husband has a wet bar around here, mind pointing me to it?" Spencer said, dryly.

Her mom stood at the door with her back to her, she slowly closed it and turned around. Her smile was long gone and she pointed to Spencer's left. "Yes, in his study, this way."

Spencer followed her mother and was soon in a large room with books lining every inch of the walls save the floor to ceiling window. She went straight to the wet bar and poured herself two fingers of scotch. She downed it in one swig.

"Damn Peter, that's some good scotch." She poured another and nursed it this time.

"Aside from raiding my scotch, what are you doing here?"

"Well," she looked at her mother who was still by the door, "I thought you could call Melissa and tell her to bring over that baby she just had."

Spencer watched her mother's smile return, even brighter than before. "Really? I'll go call her right now." She seemed so happy, she just floated out of the room.

Peter stood up from his desk and walked over to Spencer who was admiring her father's encyclopedia collection.

"No one uses these anymore, it's a lost art. Who needs these when you've got the internet?"

"Are you still a lesbian?" Leave it to her dad to ask the hard-hitting questions.

"Are you still an asshole? I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that the answer to both questions is yes Peter."

He sighed as she poured her third glass of his scotch. "Spencer, you're a beautiful, intelligent girl. You could have your pick of the litter when it comes to men, why waste your time with..." He stopped short.

"You can't even say it huh, Peter? Let me ask you a question. Melissa went to Harvard like you wanted, Yale law like you wanted, married some Abercrombie wearing, country club membership having, blonde haired blue-eyed dude like you wanted, and pushed out a grandchild like you wanted. If you and mom have the perfect daughter, why the hell do you need me to be all your ideals too?"

At some point during her spiel, Veronica reentered the study. "Spencer..." She sighed and came to stand next to Peter who was silently fuming. "We love you sweetheart, you're our daughter, is it too much for us to want the best for you?"

"Got a man cave somewhere in this place?" She asked, completely ignoring her parents. "I really need to catch up on my ESPN."

"V, could you show her where she can 'catch up'." He said mockingly.

"Sure honey." She kissed her husband and walked out with Spencer following her.

"See you later Peter." Spencer said without turning around. She doesn't really remember when she stopped calling him dad, but after the one and only time he objected, he learned she'd be calling him Peter for a long time.

They walked back through the foyer and descended the black and white marble stairs. They walked through a finished basement complete with a pool table and a few arcade games. Her mom led her through a door and they walked into a theater room . The screen had to be at least a hundred inches. All the chairs were oversized black leather recliners with cup holders in both armrests.

"Melissa will be here shortly. I can't wait for you to meet Emma, she's so perfect. Can I get you anything sweetie." She put her hand on Spencer's shoulder, which she shrugged off.

"Why are you acting like this isn't the first time we've been in the same room in six years?!"

"Spencer, I thought you came here to make amends, not jump down our throats in our own home." She said evenly.

"Amends? For what? You have no idea what's going on in my life, and I'll bet my left arm you don't give a fuck. I came here so I could see Melissa's brat and you'd get the fuck off my case." Spencer threw back the rest of her scotch and instantly wished she had more.

"Try not to be drunk when you hold your niece for the first time."

"I'm not holding it! You guys didn't even come to my fucking graduation!"

"Spencer, how many times do we have to apologize for that? It was a mere mishap. Melissa lost her passport and we had to wait..."

"Wait for her?! You could have left her in Rome! It's not like she cared to come see me graduate anyway!" Her throat started to hurt from how loud she yelled.

"Spencer, calm down please." Her mom tried to move closer but Spencer just backed away.

"Give me the remote and leave me alone. Come get me when your daughter and her spawn gets here. I'll make nice for a couple of minutes then I'm out of here and you can leave me alone." She sat in one of the chairs and reclined it.

"Why are you behaving like this? You're a grown woman Spencer, you should act like it."

"Whatever. Remote?" She looked over her shoulder and her heart momentarily stopped. Her mom had tears flowing from her eyes with the most devastated expression on her face. She wanted to crack, she wanted to get up and hold her mom, apologize for reducing her to tears, but her pride got in the way. She wore a mask of indifference and stuck her hand out.

Veronica looked at her for a moment then shifted to lift up the universal remote tablet. "I really don't know what to say." She handed to her.

"Say nothing, it's what you and Peter are best at." She faced the large projection screen and played with the remote. "Save the tears mom, they don't even come close to the amount I've shed."

"You don't know how many tears I've shed over you hating us. You don't know a thing Spencer Hastings." The door shut, and Spencer's tears flowed.

* * *

With all her might she tried not to feel anything when she saw her niece for the first time. She tried and failed. Her heart expanded three times it's normal size in her chest. Melissa was sitting on the couch with Emma in her arms when Spencer followed her mother into their family room. It'd been much longer since she's seen Melissa. It had been around eight years. When Melissa would come home, Spencer would disappear until she left. Then Spencer went to college and hadn't seen anyone in the room until today, well except for Emma, who was perfect.

She always thought Melissa had invited her to her wedding just because it was the proper thing to do, she knew her older sister didn't really want her there so she tore the invitation up without even looking at the details. She only knew what Melissa's husband Joshua looked like because her mother insisted on emailing her their wedding pictures.

"Hello Spencer." Melissa's voice made Spencer's skin crawl.

"Melissa."

"How is...teaching?" The condescending tone made Spencer want to slap her, but she was holding a baby.

"It's very rewarding. How's being a blood thirsty attorney?

"Practicing law is a very respectable profession Spencer." Peter defended.

"Whatever. So..." She moved a little closer to where Melissa sat. "That's it huh?"

"This is Emma, your niece."

"Uh...hi." Emma blinked her eyes sleepily which made Spencer wear her first smile since earlier that day.

"Do you...want to hold her?" Melissa asked, sounding unsure.

"Oh, no. I just came to see her."

"Spencer, you should hold her." Veronica reached down to pull Emma from Melissa's arms. "Hey there, you ready to meet your aunt?"

"I really don't want to hold her mom." Spencer held her hands up defensively and back away. "Actually, I should go."

"Spencer, no wait, you just got here." The look of devastation was slowly making it's way back onto her mother's face.

"Mom..."

"Please stay a little while longer." Spencer was about to dart out the room but her mother's earlier tears kept her put. "Here, hold her."

Spencer reluctantly allowed her mother to place the infant in her arms. Emma looked up at her, she had the prettiest brown eyes, they actually looked a lot like Spencer's. She blink back tears.

"She's a really good-looking kid Melissa."

"Thank you. Are you seeing anyone."

That cam out of nowhere. "Nothing serious."

"Will you be giving us grandkids, I mean do you think that's in your future?"

"I don't know mom." Spencer couldn't look away from Emma who was wiggling in her arms. "Would you and Peter accept my wife? Would you accept our kids even if they weren't biological mine? I honestly only want one, what if my wife gives birth, would you love that kid as much as you love Emma?" Peter clear his throat and readjusted the newspaper he was reading. "I guess that answers my question."

"Spencer, we'd accept any children you choose to raise as your own, right Peter?"

"I don't see how that child would be my grandchild, it wouldn't."

"So if I had a husband and we adopted a child, you wouldn't love it?"

"That's different."

"How, because there's a penis involved?" Spencer was beginning to feel closed in, hot and unable to breathe. "I think it's time I go." She walked over to Melissa who stood and took Emma back.

"It was good to see you Spencer, you've grown into a very beautiful woman."

"Uh...thanks." She felt uncomfortable. She didn't know if this was Melissa all grown up and mature or the same Melissa, trying to impress their parents.

"Maybe you can come to Philly every once in a while? You know, so you can get to know Emma, watch her grow. Josh is an only child and I want her to know her only aunt."

"Yeah...uh, I'll call you."

"You don't have my number."

"Mom can text it to me." She ran her hand over Emma's curls. "Bye Emma. See you Melissa. Peter." She walked out with her mother close behind. She got in her car and stuck her key in the ignition, turning it on. She rolled her window down and looked up at her mother.

"You ever think that the reason you and Peter clash so much is because you're the exact same person?"

"I'm _nothing _like him, don't insult me like that if you really want me to come back."

"Spencer..." She sighed and looked around the quiet neighborhood. "I'll admit I haven't done everything right and we didn't take your coming out as well as we could have but it's been years Spencer."

"You're point?"

"My point is that you've spent so much time hating us and being bitter about the mistakes we've made that you keep making the same ones over and over. I know we haven't been there for you like we should have and I'm sorry, but you're not the easiest person to be there for. How can we be there when all you do is run away. You went to college on the other side of the country and refused to come home for holidays. You never call and barely answer when we do..."

"I get it mom."

"Do you? Spencer, we love you. So much. Spencer, you're my baby. I want you around."

Spencer wanted to get out the car and throw her arms around her mom but decided against it. The words were too little too late. If her mother was right about one thing, it was that she was very bitter. Her parents showing up out of nowhere, only because Melissa had a baby, fueled her resentful attitude."

"I'll think about it mom." She said, stepping on the brake pedal and putting the car in reverse.

"What's there to think about Spencer? We've already spent far too much time apart."

"I'll let you know mom."

* * *

On the road, with Evanescence blaring through her speakers, she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. She almost ignored it but turned her radio off when she thought it might be Emily. Her hand blindly went into her pocket and she didn't look at who the caller was, instead just pushing accept.

"Hello?"

"Hello nani."

"Mel?"

"Someone else calling you that these days?"

"No, no, I'm just surprised. What can I do for you?"

"I just walked into my house for the first time in a long time and it feels cold and lonely. What's more is that you left a lot of your things here."

"They were things you brought me, very expensive things."

"Does that make them any less yours?"

"I..."

"Come over." That was no request.

"Um..."

"Tomorrow night, I'll cook for you, say eight o'clock?

* * *

**I really think this is the beginning of a lot of changes in these character's lives. I'm thinking Noel and Emily has just begun a beautiful friendship and what about Spencer finally seeing her family? And Meilani...I don't know where my brain will take this but even if she only makes a small appearance, I assure you, this is not the last of her.**

**Oh and btw, I figure this is as good as time as any to tell you guys...this will be a never ending fic. I have no end in mind except for the end of their lives meaning I will write Emily through college and her career, Spemily's ups and downs, Spencer might have a career change (nothing major, same field) All the way up until marriage and babies. I will write until their children have children. Don't worry, I'll make it interesting. But I'll warn you right now, there WILL be lots of angst in between the happy times. I love angst, sorry...okay so...**

**Thoughts on this chapter are... (you're supposed to fill in the blank)**

**Make your thoughts clear, I'd really like to know what you think about the various things that just occurred.**

**Thank you**

**-Management**


	36. Chapter 32

**Hey...as always, if you're reading this, thank you.**

**For those of you who take the time to give me feedback, I want you to know your words are invaluable and help me with the writing process. For those of you who do not, you make me a sad panda...**

**Warning: This chapter will have NO Spemily. AND I'm going to focus on my unhealthy Quinntana obsession for a few weeks.**

**Enjoy...maybe**

* * *

Loving Spencer was the easiest, most difficult thing Aria had ever experienced, and she assumed it would be that way for the rest of their lives. Easy, because Spencer is sweet and generous. The type of person to give you the shirt off her back. She's a friend who knows when to push and when to back off. The type of woman who would drop everything without so much as a second thought if you needed her. It's very easy to love how comfortable she was in her own skin which was admirable. And easier to love how she's non-judgmental.

Aria had spent most of her life doing whatever and whoever she wanted and Spencer never even lifted a brow. All she did was listen and offer advice when Aria would take it. Perhaps even easier to love is the amount of affection she gives. Aria never has to settle for one-armed hugs of lifeless kisses. Hell, Spencer was her first kiss, and she is one of the most special people in the world as far as she is concerned. Affection wasn't something Aria easily accepted but Spencer had always been an affectionate kid and that only grew the older she got. Yes, Spencer was very easy to love. Her care free spirit, her big heart, her loyalty, just...her. Aria thought that no one could love anyone more than she loved Spencer.

There were only a handful of people Aria knew she truly loved. Spencer, Toby, Mike, her mom and dad, Ezra. That was it. She didn't have any family in the states, most of her mom's side of the family still lived in Greece and her dad's side was non existent. She didn't have too many friends either. Spencer and Toby were more than enough to fill her friend quota.

Boyfriends? That was a joke. Aria never in her life thought a man would be capable of capturing her heart and she was even more certain that she never wanted the responsibility of having someone's heart in her hands. Then Ezra happened and altered the way she's wired.

But Spencer, Spencer always has and always will be the most important person in her life. The person she knows without any shadow of a doubt, that she cannot live without. The separation anxiety she suffers from when she's not in her presence is so strong it's almost tangible.

The woman's simply a joy.

Aria never asked, mainly because she knew the answer, but she always thought that if they weren't in each other's lives, then Spencer would have never hesitated to go to Hawaii to live with her then fiancé. Knowledge of this made Aria's heart twist uncomfortably for months after their break up. She only felt the slightest bit of relief when her best friend started sleeping around with strangers. Still, she knew she was partially responsible for Spencer's adamant decision to call off the engagement.

As easy as Spencer was to love, was almost equally as difficult for Aria.

If she were gay, her and Spencer would have the most epic love story to tell. A story that little girls fantasize about when they watch the prince rescue the princess. A love story so unbelievable Hollywood would come banging on their door to make a sickeningly sweet romantic movie about it. However, she wasn't gay. Her love affair with the Dominican happened because having sex with a woman was on her bucket list, the girl wouldn't stop trying to get in her pants, and she had to admit, the girl was as hot as every inch of hell. Crossing making it with a chick of her list aside, she had no romantic feelings towards woman. Sure she would occasionally see one she would totally roll in the hay with, but after the Dominican she thought it best not to get a girl's hopes up. Women were just too emotional.

The difficulty in loving Spencer, more times than not, lied with her sexuality. She'd be lying if she didn't _sorta_ imagine once, _maybe_ twice, what it would be like, but those thoughts were always quickly dismissed. It was sometimes a struggle to think about what _could_ be oppose to _actually_ being. Her and Spencer once had a drunken conversation about what it would be like if she were gay. Aria admitted how in love with Spencer she was, but how that love never quite reached the romantic variety. She couldn't see herself throwing Spencer up against a wall and ripping her clothes off. They would be like an old married couple who walked hand in hand on the beach and had separate twin beds like in the fifties. That was what was so difficult for Aria though. Often she felt confused by how deep her love ran but how it came up _just_ short of wanting to have crazy monkey sex with Spencer.

There was no passion there, just _feelings_. Very strong, intense feelings. Spencer's been a permanent fixture since the day they met and not having Spencer around felt like the most important part of her was missing. That has always been difficult for Aria. It's always been a struggle walking the line that is loving Spencer. Knowing that Spencer's love is just as intense, just as deep. So deep that she gave up her fiancé, something Aria thinks about daily. That was more than difficult. Loving Spencer was hard. Spencer loving her back with equal amounts of adoration was hard. Knowing they could barely be away from each other was hard. It was difficult and complicated.

Their relationship has always been difficult to explain to other's. Until last year, when Meilani called them out on how "close" they are, she never examined their "closeness" or how they may seem to people on the outside looking in. She didn't want to have sex with Spencer, that would be gross. She didn't want to be Spencer's girlfriend, that would be weird, no matter how much they care for each other. All she knew, all she could explain was that she didn't know how to be anything other than a cuddle monster when it came to her best friend. When they kissed on the lips, there was never any arousal surging through her body. Even on the few occasions she's given Spencer a lingering kiss, one that might be construed as sexual, there was never anything there. She loves and appreciates Spencer so much and sometimes those feelings come out in the form of kisses. Whether they're on her lips or all over her face.

Yes. Her relationship and uncontrollable feelings for Spencer came to her easily, but not without difficulty.

Others might think them to be weird, maybe "too" close. Some might be confused when Aria utters how "in love" she is with her best friend. She is though. She's so in love with Spencer it scares her.

To Aria, being in love with someone isn't always romantic. In fact, before Ezra came into her life, she had never experienced romantic love. To her, being _in love_ wasn't completely about the feeling, that's not what the term meant to her. It was about the profound respect you have for the individual. Love isn't a _word _to Aria, it's actions, it's something deep in your soul that can't be explained and that never goes away. Love is everlasting. Being in love is a state of being therefore permanent. Aria knew she'd never stop loving Spencer, she knew that. She knew her emotions were separate from the state she's in. Sometimes emotions caused her to hate Spencer, sometimes Spencer made her cry. Emotions are ever-varying. Being inside of love is unconditional and it's forever. Much like a parent can say they are in love with their child, that's what her love for Spencer felt like. Something so intrinsically true. Something wild, untamed.

Times like these, when her deep love for Spencer was on display, was the most difficult. Moments when she wanted to slap the taste out of Spencer's mouth made her intense love taste bitter.

Lately, within the last two years or so, she noticed a mild shift in Spencer. Right around the time they began their teaching careers. At first Aria thought Spencer was still sour about her family issues. Maybe even still heartbroken over Maya. But one lie after another made Aria realize Spencer's shift was deeper than her mommy issues. Let's not even talk about her daddy issues. And completely surpassed her lingering feelings for the actress. To other's, the change went undetected, to Aria it couldn't have been more obvious. Aria kept mum on it, waiting and wanting to see how things would unfold. The Maya lie did her in and when she saw Maya for the first time, it was Spencer she wanted to punch in the face. Since she would never dream of striking Spencer, Maya made a good alternative. Sure she still felt raw about the actress' treatment of her best friend but seeing Maya so close to Spencer, she knew she just knew that wasn't the first time they'd seen one another. She knew Spencer had kept that a secret, and she was livid.

A few more lies, a few more uncovered secrets, and almost a year later, Aria witness something scandalous. Emily Fields and Spencer wrapped up in a hug like they were the only two people inhabiting the earth. Aria knows Spencer, well. Just like she knew about Maya, was just like she knew Spencer was madly in love with her student. Emily had always been ridiculously obvious if Aria was telling the truth. She spied her lusting after Spencer on their very first day when Emily was just fourteen.

Not for one second did Aria think Spencer would do it. She seemed quite oblivious to her student's affection but what she saw in Spencer's eyes that day, that said it all. Still, she was about ninety percent certain Spencer would never, ever have sex with her student. Maybe when the girl was eighteen and Spencer wouldn't be her teacher anymore. Then it would be really hot. Spencer would be twenty-six with a hot ass eighteen year old as her arm candy. Sure it would _still _be a bit unethical because of the former student teacher relationship but at least it would be legal. At least Spencer wouldn't go to federal prison if anyone were to find out. That, Aria could handle, but this, this was eating away at her.

* * *

She should have known Emily would be at Samara's grave. Now she was heartbroken and annoyed. Samara's eighteenth birthday snuck up on Aria. She'd put a reminder in her phone when Samara asked her too. The then sixteen year old Samara informed Aria that she wanted her to be the first person to take her to a strip club when she turned eighteen. Excited, Aria put a reminder in her phone right then and the morning when she woke up on her couch with Mike cuddled tightly against her, the reminder brought her to tears. Mike groggily held her and didn't ask the reason behind her tears. She was so grateful for the people in her life that knew her well enough to know, she _hates _questions. She talks when she feels like it and Mike is one of those people who understands. He might poke around but he never pushes.

After cooking her only sibling breakfast, which was more like lunch, she asked him if he wanted to spend some time with Spencer. Of course he did, he loves Spencer almost as much as she does. Emily's presence in Spencer's apartment was noticeable even as she stood out in the hallway with Mike. Normally when Spencer answered the door, she'd barge right in but Mike was with her and he'll be attending school with Emily, a grade lower, but they'll still be in the same building. Aria simply waited for Spencer's cue to throw Mike off, which she knew she'd give, and waited in the hallway.

Mike walked her down to her car and opened the door for her like the gentleman he is. She looked up at her little brother from her seated position. He was hella handsome if anyone wanted to ask her. His hair just as dark, his eyes just as bright as her own. They looked just alike. Two really hot half Greek siblings with evenly distributed amounts of sexiness and adorableness. Not everyone can pull off the hot-without-even-trying look, but the Montgomery children, in Aria's biased opinion, clearly did. He smiled a crooked smile, one that reminded her so much of her own, and he engaged her in the mindless chit-chat she initiated, waiting to see Emily exit the building. Mike told her that if she wanted to talk about her crying fit earlier, he was "totally gonna listen." But if not, she could feel free to cry on his shoulder anytime day or night. Her heart warmed and she momentarily forgot about how upsetting the day was without Samara and how pissed she was at Spencer for having Emily over. The warmth ran cold when she spotted Emily walking out and unlocking her bike. She asked Mike to give her a kiss on the cheek and shoed him off to go spend time with Spencer.

Driving to the only cemetery in Rosewood was pretty much the least fun thing she'd ever done. After she purchased two dozen white roses, she drove straight to Wine & Spirits, knowing she'd need to hit the bottle hard later, then off to Samara's final resting place.

Emily was there. Shit. Right there talking animatedly in the direction of the tombstone behind her, reaching in her bag for something. Rage. Annoyance. Sorrow. All mixed up into one very unpleasant knot in her throat that trickled down to her heart then kicked her in the gut. She wanted some alone time with Samara but Emily looked as if she was set up to be there for a while. She sighed and turned her car off. Suddenly she was grateful for Emily's unwanted presence, this gave her the chance to give her a piece of her mind.

Now Aria didn't really think Emily was an _idiot _. She thought she was behaving idiotically, but she knew she wasn't stupid. However, Aria had to make a point, she had to let Emily know how much of a child she actually is. The girl was running with the big dogs expecting to not get trampled or bit. Aria had to knock her down a few pegs. If that was going to be accomplished, she had to do it through insults. Emily was right about one thing though, the girl loved Samara, and Samara loved her. Samara would gush to Aria about Emily long before Spencer accidentally found out. Samara said that her best friend Noel was great but he was a guy who didn't offer much wisdom nor did he excel at "girl talk". So she asked Aria to be the ear that she talks off, Aria said yes without thinking about it. She adored Samara. She didn't like to play favorites but the spunky girl was most definitely her favorite, without even trying. They just connected and could talk for hours.

Somewhere, deep down inside, she knew Emily really loved Spencer. That love didn't stop their current situation from being dangerous. It didn't lessen Aria's disgust or fear. The two are eight years apart, how could this possibly work?

The vice principal was the one who told Aria about the accident. She turned on the news and it was true, Samara had been killed by some idiot evading arrest. Things like that wasn't suppose to happen in Rosewood, and seventeen year old girls weren't supposed to have their life taken. Aria was crushed and after sobbing quietly for what felt like eternity, she looked at her clock and realized first period was over. She needed her best friend's arms around her. Ignoring the fact that Spencer's number one reaction was her fear for Emily, she fell in her arms. Spencer's arms was the only place she wanted to be at that moment. However, she knew a storm was about to pour down over them and it had nothing to do with the life that was just lost. So she waited. Low and behold, half a year later, Spencer was having sex with the girl she feared for on that fateful day.

* * *

Emily looked damaged by every word Aria threw at her as if each letter had a blade that cut her deeper and deeper. Funny thing was, walking away, she shook her head because she knew that Emily had even less intention to stay away than Spencer did. Shame. Spencer seemed happy with Emily. When they would talk about her Spencer lit up in a way Aria had never seen, not even when she was co co bananas over Maya back in high school. Although she could clearly see how special their connection is, it didn't quell her fear for Spencer's future and safety. To her knowledge, Emily's dad is a military man. How will he react? There was no scenario where Aria saw him being okay with Spencer and Emily's relationship. What if they get caught before the girl reaches her eighteenth birthday? Even scarier, what if Emily gets bored. The likelihood, in Aria's eyes, of that happening was low, but the girl _is _sixteen and she _could _very well outgrow Spencer. What if they spend six years together, happy and in love. Spencer would be thirty, Emily only twenty-two. Those are vastly different points in one's life. At the moment where they are mentally and emotional is already a huge discrepancy. But thirty and twenty-two, that's a world apart.

Aria couldn't stand the thought of Spencer's heart being broken, and even less, the thought of Emily doing the breaking. So, yes she was harsh towards Emily, a stone cold bitch really, but she thought it vital for Emily to know where she stands. She thinks she's too young and she does _not _approve. The sullen look on Emily's face made it clear that she'd gotten her point across. She laid her flowers down and spoke to Samara.

"I'm really sorry about the drama on your birthday but come on Sammy, this is really fucked up. I know you're turning in your grave over this shit, I would be. I can't wrap my head around this, you know? Just...just do me a favor, watch out for them two, like do some scary ghost shit if you have to. Just don't let them get caught, if you can prevent it. Sammy, please, I'm begging you, don't let them get caught." She sighed and thought about stealing one of the Reese's cups that Samara, clearly, wouldn't be able to eat. "Damn I miss your crazy ass. I really, really miss you actually and I hope...I hope you're resting with God. I'll see you on your next birthday, yeah?" She stood up. "Bye Sammy."

She took a left out the cemetery and even though it was the middle of the day, she made good on her birthday promise.

* * *

Some random stripper with huge fake boobs had her ass in Aria's lap. She was sitting in a private room at Onyx in Philadelphia. The stripper's ass in one hand and a shot of tequila in the other.

"I thought I told you, no touching." The stripper named Geisha leaned back and whispered seductively.

"I thought I told you that ass was too fat for me not to touch. Get up, bend over, and make it clap." Aria reached over to her right where her pile of one dollar bills were sitting, grabbed some, and threw them in the air. The stripper did as instructed and Aria playfully slapped her wiggling cheeks. "Damn girl, you're a pro." She laughed when Geisha shot her a look.

"Duh."

"Right, my bad." Birthday Song by 2 Chainz started blaring from the speakers and Aria got excited. She poured herself and her stripper companion another shot, and stood up to dance with her. Geisha twerked better than the girls in the music video and Aria was loving every second of it. Geisha faced Aria and turned her around, bending her over in one swift motion. She grinded her front on Aria's ass and gave it a couple smacks for good measure. They danced out the remainder of the song and Aria asked for another lap dance. When the stripper put her hands on Aria's thighs as she sat in her lap, to bend forward a little, Aria pulled on her string bikini. Geisha's flirty smile made Aria offer one of her own. Geisha tossed her bikini top to the other side of the couch and leaned back. Aria took a fist full of ones and rubbed them up and down Geisha's front. Geisha's hips rolling made Aria's overly active sex drive speed up. She let the bills fall and cupped Geisha's full breast.

"You really don't know how to listen do you?" Geisha purred.

"Nope." She smirked and squeezed both her hands that were spilling over. Geisha turned around to straddle Aria, her hips still grinding.

"You know what I would love to do right now?"

"Is it going to cost me more money?"

"It wouldn't cost you a thing except earth shattering orgasms." She responded smugly.

"I'm listening."

The thick, brown-skinned stripper leaned closely to Aria's ear, her breasts rubbing in all the right places. Aria's hands instinctively went behind Geisha, grabbing as much ass as she could. "I want to fuck the shit out of you with my strap." She pulled back and their eyes met.

"You offer strap on sex to all your customers."

"Of course not but..."

"But what."

"I never get turned on in here, mostly because it's all men and I'm a lady lover, but even with the women, I keep it professional."

"And now."

"Now? You got me wet as fuck. And I would love nothing more than to see what your face looks like when you come."

"Fuck." Aria threw her head back. She was moderately drunk, horny and lonely. Ezra was in Seattle with his grandparents, who were apparently loaded, something she didn't find out until recently. He had already spent a couple of weeks in Pittsburg with his parents. He told her he couldn't wait to get back to be with her and to hang out with Mike, but next week couldn't come fast enough. Here was this sexy as hell stripper offering no strings attached orgasms, just the way she liked them, until Ezra that is. She wanted to, she wanted to let this stripper fuck her so bad. Her desire to forget about Emily and Spencer and her parent's divorce, by losing herself in emotionless sex looked appetizing. That was the old Aria though. The one who cheated on Ezra already and didn't plan on doing it again. She looked at Geisha and it dawned on her, she wanted to spend the rest of her life with Ezra. Never before had she been with someone who made her want to be with them and only them, that's how she felt and she knew that was priceless.

"As much as I'd love to ride your plastic dick, and believe me I would, I mean they never go soft, you could fuck me all day, but I can't."

"Why not sexy?"

"I have a boy...boyfriend." She struggled to say. "And I love him, I don't want to cheat on him, even with your fine ass. But, what you could do for me is put all your clothes back on and strip for me again." Geisha got up to do just that as Aria made it rain dollar bills again.

* * *

"Rough day?" Mike asked when he sat by Aria. She text him to say she was back home and he could come up whenever, she wasn't expecting him to come right away, but she was happy about it all the same.

"Ugh...I'm just a little drunk, that's all."

"Wanna talk about this?"

"A student of mine passed away not too long ago, today's her birthday."

"I'm so sorry to hear that Aria. You two were close?"

"Yeah. We were." Mike pulled Aria into his arms and she laid her head on his chest. "You're a good brother." She told him after he held her for a little while. She pulled out his embrace and cuddled into his side.

"You're a _great_ sister."

"I know." She replied cockily. "Michael, why didn't you tell me things were as bad as they were at home?"

He shrugged. "I don't know, I mean you're here and I was there and..."

"And?! When you called and said you needed me, was I not there for you? You asked if you could live here, did I not take you in?!"

"Yeah but..."

Aria sat up straight, looking at her brother. "But nothing! You can always come to me, I don't give a fuck if I'm on the moon, I'll find the first space ship to get to you as fast as possible. You understand?"

"Yeah, yeah. I get it. I'm sorry. I really just didn't want to burden you with mom and dad's stuff. You're out the nest you know, you don't have to deal with that crap."

"I may be grown and on my own, but their still my parents and this still...well sucks."

Aria saw Mike fighting his tears. "I know it's just...I don't know." He hung his head sadly.

"Mike, I didn't' know you were so...sad." She patted the top of his head.

"I'm not a dog Aria."

"Sorry, I'm just not used to comforting a man like this, guys don't cry."

"That's what's wrong with this world."

"Huh?"

"Society tells us it's not okay for a man to cry then we as men perpetuate that notion by trying to act hard all the time. Then men end up emotionally damaged, unable to express anything but anger and sexual desire. It's okay for a man to cry Aria, I don't want to cry but I can't remember ever being this sad in my life. I feel like a part of me has died and that's just..."

"Mike I'm sorry. Shit...when did you get so smart?" Her smile was wide and full of pride.

"It probably happened when I came out the womb."

She snickered at his mock arrogance and hugged him tight. "Mikey, you have me okay and I'm not going anywhere. Actually," She pulled back. "I was thinking of buying a house, and maybe asking Ezra if he...maybe wanted to get rid of his little studio."

"And what?" Mike began. "Move in with us? Into a house, like a family?"

It was devastating thinking of Mike growing up in a broken home. Apparently he couldn't handle it either which is why he asked to live with her. She wanted to make sure he never felt broken again. She wanted to provide a loving, stable environment. "Well...yeah. If that's okay with you?"

"I think that's a great idea, I like him a lot." Mike met Ezra on multiple occasions, in fact they hit it off fairly easy.

"I promise you Mike, you'll never feel like our home is broken, I'll make sure you're happy, okay?" Promises were important to Aria. She thought that if a person didn't have their word, they didn't have anything at all. This was a promise she'd raise every demon from hell just to keep.

"I love you Aria." He pulled her in for yet another hug, this one just a little tighter.

"I love you too little brother. More than life."

* * *

Aria's loved Spencer for most of her life. She's loved her for so long and so deeply that she doesn't even remember what it's like _not_ to have her in her heart. Sometimes she felt like when she met Spencer, a separate heart started to grow, one that was reserved for only Spencer to occupy. At the moment, things were messy and beyond complicated and her best friend wouldn't heed her advice. At the moment, she was more than aware of her love for Spencer, how easily it came to her, how nothing could change it. As she laid in bed trying but failing to find sleep, she thought of the difficulties that came with such a pure, unadulterated love.

Yes, Spencer was oh so easy to love, and just as difficult.

* * *

(Guest reviews appear in email before website. How neat)

**From: Guest**

** You are so fucking annoying, its just a story stop being so damn butthurt**

Nice review, thanks. Yes "guest" it is just a story, one I don't have to write. In the famous words of Heath Ledger "If you're good at something, never do it for free." Writers on this website do all this for free. For your enjoyment. If you don't like that I'm "Butthurt" don't read.

Even though I wrote this to be a smart ass, I REALLY liked exploring Aria like this. Plus some of you have been confused about Aria's feelings and intentions...so I'm pleased with how this turned out.

**Hey make sure you check out my reviews on this in a couple of hours, I'm sure there will be more hate for me to laugh at such as this disrespectful review above. (I really dislike being cursed at)**

So until next time people. Maybe check out my Quinntana fics to hold you over on this one?

Kisses...

-Management


	37. KINDA IMPORTANT

Hello awesome readers who I thoroughly enjoy writing for. I'm so sorry about my absence. At first, it was to get all these Quinntana ideas out of my head, so I was taking a brief break from "Control" to focus on my multi chapter fics as well as the one shots I'm itching to write. Regrettably, I'll have to take a hiatus with no timetable for my return. For those of you who could care less, stop reading, for those of you who enjoy the stories I write and will miss them, I'm sorry. I love to write and above all else, I LOVE talking to you guys about these stories. I love this site and there are some authors that if they had to take an indefinite hiatus, I'd be upset. So for those who care, I apologize again. Sometimes luck can be bad, I've had some of that lately. My laptop (sorta) blew up, in flames...well there was smoke. Anyway it's completely fried, along with SOOOO much of my writing (thankfully not all of it) and I haven't the slightest clue when I'll get another one. NOW of course I have access to this site through my phone (hence this update) BUT writing (and editing) 5,000 to 10,000 word chapters would be SUCH a pain. Personally I think my writing would suffer because of it. If I'm going to write, I want it to be at least half way decent. I'm not the best, no, but I want what I write to at least be of some quality. SO unless any of you would like to purchase and ship me a brand spanking new laptop, this is the last time you'll hear from me, for I don't know how long. SUPER SORRY, but life happens to get in our way sometimes. Still talk to me if you like, I'll keep up with my email. Even send me prompts still because I'll be writing by hand from now on. OH that reminds me, I WILL NOT STOP writing these stories. I WILL continue on, you just won't be able to read it. The second I get anywhere near a computer, I'll update, but I certainly can't tell you when (and when/if I update, they will be sporadic). Once again, sorry. I totally love (most) you guys! I've made some awesome acquaintances because of this site (who I talk to about more than just writing but especially that), and I've garnered some loyal readers. You're freaking awesome. You inspire me and give me the courage to write my own original work (maybe one day you'll read a book I wrote). So anyway, (sorry, I'm long-winded) thanks for reading these stories and being your awesome selves. Sorry to leave you like this.

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-Management


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